Their First Year
by Ellie Parker
Summary: Post-Crown. Follow Queen Eadlyn and Eikko through the first year following her Selection as they take on the world and learn how to rule together. Updates every Tuesday at 9 pm (ish) EST!
1. Chapter 1

I was queen of Illéa and no one was more powerful than me. Except for my parents, apparently.

"Eadlyn, we said no," Mom insisted as I stood in their bedroom the night of my engagement. Dad was apparently grabbing some things from the study to look over and give the final seal of approval on before passing them off to me but Mom was getting ready for bed, meaning that I had her cornered.

"But I know for a fact that you and Dad did it!" I argued.

Mom frowned and paused in the activity of brushing her hair. "Who told you?"

"General Leger," I answered triumphantly. While it had been awkward to ask General Leger about whether or not my parents slept together when they were engaged, I needed to do it to build my case.

It was around midnight and everything was finally dying down in the palace. Eikko and I had a few interviews with reporters and then went through any marathon photo shoot with various combinations of the two of us and my family and friends. I even managed to rope Lady Brice – _Aunt_ Brice – into a picture with my dad. I was able to eat the fastest dinner on record, consisting of a piece of celebratory cake and a few carrots, washed down by a glass of champagne. It was well past ten o'clock when everything slowed down long enough for Eikko and I to scratch our heads and ask ourselves the question, "What now?"

"I guess we go up to my room and get some sleep," I said to him. "We're going to have a long day tomorrow."

Dad, who had been walking a few paces ahead of us with an arm around Mom, stopped and turned to face us. "You will both get a full night of rest in your respective bedrooms," he said forcefully.

"What?" I snapped. It had only been hours ago when Daddy told me to marry Eikko and trust my heart and break the rules and on and on. Now he was trying to put restrictions on my love life?

"It's nonnegotiable, Eadlyn. Say goodnight here." With that he turned and continued walking up the steps to the third floor. I looked to Mom but she simply shook her head, following Dad upstairs.

My face flushed with embarrassment and I suddenly had a hard time maintaining eye contact with Eikko. "I'm sorry about that," I mumbled.

He smiled and put his hand on my face. "We'll have the rest of our lives to sleep in the same bed. If it means respecting your parents, I can make some sacrifices." We said goodnight there with the agreement that we were going to have a proper date at some point over the next couple days.

After getting myself ready for bed though, I realized that I was restless. I couldn't help but wonder if Dad was being just a little hypocritical in this decision. After all, they got engaged at my age and had no parents in the palace to enforce any rules. And the passion I could see between my parents wasn't something that suddenly manifested when they got married. It was something that was there from the very first kiss. Which, of course, led to a rather embarrassing phone call to General Leger, confirming that they had indeed slept together before they were even properly engaged. And that led me to standing in my mother's bedroom in nothing but my nightgown and robe, pleading my case.

She sighed and pressed her lips together. "We only slept together. It was completely innocent."

"And it would be the same for myself and Eikko." She scoffed and flicked the light off in the bathroom. Slowly she walked over to their bed and simply climbed in, lying down right in the middle. She always slept in the middle of the bed though, for as long as I could remember. "What? Do I not seem trustworthy?"

"You're forgetting that I was an eighteen-year-old girl at one time too."

"But you were married."

Her eyebrows rose like that should have been the obvious answer. "Exactly." She smoothed her hands over the heavy blue duvet and shook her head. "If your father finds out…"

My mouth fell open. "Is that a yes?"

"I didn't say yes," she told me in a measured voice, making it clear that she wasn't going to give me verbal permission but that she was going to let it slide. "But like I said, if your father finds out, I expect you to answer to him. And you'll need a better argument than what you provided me."

I blew a kiss to her and dashed to the door. "Love you Mom!" I called before ducking out. As I flew down the hall to the stairs leading to the second floor, Dad caught me outside the study.

"Your brother is on the phone," he said. That was enough to make me stop running. Eikko could wait for Ahren. I took the phone from Dad who grabbed the opportunity to ask me, "Where were you going?"

"Down to get a snack, I'm starving!" I whispered urgently to him, one hand over the receiver of the phone.

He nodded sympathetically. "Want me to send something up to your room for you?"

"No, I'll just go down after I talk to Ahren. Thanks Daddy," I said, offering a smile. "I mean, really, thank you. For all you did today." He kissed my forehead and strolled down the hall to his bedroom, his hands buried deep in his pockets.

Finally I lifted the phone to my ear and said, "Hello? Ahren?"

Instead of hearing Ahren though, Camille's squeal came through at a decibel only heard by bats. "The translator! _Quel toupet_! I was so sure you would choose Kile and then you pulled this. He's not bad looking, that's for sure."

"Camille, I think a simple congratulations would suffice," Ahren said to her kindly. "You're on speaker, Eady."

"I just can't believe it!" Camille breathed out.

I could practically hear Ahren rolling his eyes. There was some shuffling and the sound of a door closing and then Ahren saying, "Camille had to run out for something. It's just me."

"So?"

He chuckled softly. "So I wish I had taken the time to introduce myself to the guy more when I was home last. I'm not sure how I feel about my big sister being engaged to a guy I hardly know."

"He's really sweet," I assured him.

"Yeah?"

"And kind and generous and handsome and wonderful," I gushed. "I know it was sudden."

"You could say that," he teased. "The last thing I expected to wake up to this morning was news of you getting engaged. If I'd known I would have watched last night. But Eady, a constitutional monarchy?"

I rubbed my forehead, leaning against the door of the office. It was far too late for me to be thinking about the big changes being made to our country's government in the near future. "It has to be done, Ahren. And I thought you'd be happy. That's what you and Camille have."

"I am happy. It's just so…" He hesitated, looking for the right word.

"Sudden?"

"Yeah. When did you decide on all of that?"

"Honestly? About five minutes before announcing it."

He sighed and I knew he was shaking his head at me. "You're so much like Mom."

"Well if we're playing that game, you're just like Dad."

Another door opened in the background and I heard Camille's voice say something quietly that I couldn't quite catch. "I'll be right there, promise," he said to her in a reverent voice. "I have to go, Eady. And you should sleep anyway. Still doing New Year's in Paris?"

"I suppose. Is that really the next time we'll see each other?" I tried to mask the pain in my voice but the thought of going a whole six months without once laying eyes on Ahren felt like a death sentence.

"Not if you don't get married first," he said. My coronation was just a few days ago and I was still exhausted and I knew it wasn't even as crazy as my wedding would be. I had only been engaged for a few hours; my wedding itself was not on my mind yet.

"Well, maybe we'll just run away to France," I said. "You still owe me pictures, by the way. I want one of you and Camille to put on my desk."

"No problem." He groaned and I knew he was stretching behind his own desk. "I suppose Camille and I will have to stop in Illéa for a day or so for Dad's birthday. Maybe we'll get another surprise baby this year," he said, referencing Dad's twenty-ninth birthday where Mom accidentally announced to the whole world that she was pregnant with Osten.

"Maybe," I said even though we both knew that there was no way, not with Mom's health. "We'll see each other at some point in the next few months. Just promise to call at least once a week."

"The phone works both ways."

"Well, I'm queen and you're nothing more than a prince consort. I think you have more spare time than I have."

He laughed. "Ouch, already pulling rank. Alright, I'll call you once a week and at some point I need to sit down and actually talk to this Erik guy, okay? He needs to be reminded that even though I'm not there, I reserve my full right to exercise protective twin brother duties."

I rolled my eyes. Of course Ahren would still find it necessary to play the protective brother role from another continent. It wasn't like I had two other brothers here. "Okay Ahren. I'll talk to you next week? Maybe at a more decent hour for me?"

"Sure, sis. Congrats."

"Thanks. Love you."

"Love you too." I kept the phone pressed to my ear even after it disconnected, a ghost of a smile lingering. It seemed strange to think that just a few weeks ago, Ahren was the only one to bring me the most peace in life. Just thinking about Eikko and his now permanent presence in my life was enough to make my pounding heart almost stop altogether.

I left the phone sitting on my desk and pretty much ran the rest of the way down to the second floor. It took a few minutes for Eikko to answer his door but as soon as it was even partially opened I pushed my way through and crashed into him. "Eadlyn, what're you doing here?"

"Mom gave me unofficial permission to come down here. Goodness, I still can't get over how embarrassing that was," I groaned, letting my forehead rest against his chest. He chuckled and hugged me tight, shutting his door quietly. "I'm exhausted though so can we please get some sleep?" I started pulling him toward his bed but he hesitated. "What?"

"Henri's next door. I still feel guilty about this," he said, waving a finger between the two of us. "Can we go up to your room?"

I shook my head. "Kile is right down the hall. Not that it's a big deal but my parents would also be sleeping right across from us."

A mischievous smile crawled across Eikko's lips. "Sleeping," he repeated.

"They should be," I said, cringing. There were many late nights where I would be returning from the study and pass by their bedroom, damning Gregory Illéa for not making the palace walls thicker. Although I knew that Mom's heart was still healing so the probability of them being awake at all hours of the night were relatively slim for the coming weeks.

"Well then where do we go, Your Majesty?" he asked.

I could see the answer in his eyes. With a whole lot of other emotions. "Do you have any candles in your bathroom? Grab as many as you can carry," I instructed when he nodded. I scooped a few candles myself and a box of matches and then slipped inside the secret passage across the hall from his room. I led him for a few minutes down the dark passageway, occasionally hearing his feet trip up in the unfamiliar corridor. Finally we reached the spot we were just a few nights prior and we both got to work setting up the candles.

"I didn't grab any blankets or pillows," he realized, looking incredibly guilty, like he had somehow let me down.

"We don't need them," I told him, sitting down on the floor and pulling him down to sit across from me.

Eikko sat down with his legs crossed in front of him, our finger twisted together dangling between us. He was staring at me but not in a way that was unsettling. I stared right back, feeling like I was seconds away from drowning in his blue eyes. "Today was crazy, right? That's not every day for you?"

I smiled and shook my head. "Today was exceptionally crazy. I just can't believe that yesterday I was saying goodbye to you forever and now…"

"And now we're getting married?" he finished for me.

"Yeah," I breathed out, squeezing his hand. "I just feel like too much has been going right lately. Aside from the obvious drama of Marid, ascending was a dream come true. My mom is alive. Ahren is happy in France. And I get to have you, which is more than I ever let myself dream about. I can't help but wonder whether I really deserve all of this."

"Eadlyn," he said softly, sliding closer to put his hand on my face. "Even queens deserve happily ever afters. Probably you more than any other queen. Honestly, I think it's the happily ever afters that get you through this job. Just look at your parents. Could you imagine one of them going through all of this without the other?"

Dad's despair as he clutched General Leger like a life raft was too fresh in my mind. With what I had been learning about their Selection, I really couldn't imagine how they got their happily ever after but they did and I truly couldn't see them in any other way. "I guess I'll need to get you a meeting with the palace decorating team to start discussing your suite upstairs."

"My suite? I have my own room?" he asked me in disbelief.

"There are perks to being the queen's fiancé, you know."

"Well, we need to get you a ring, don't we?"

I smiled and looked down at his ring on my right hand. "Or…" I slid the ring off and handed it to him. "We could use this one."

His face broke into one of the largest smiles I had ever seen on him as he took the ring from me. "You're a queen though. You deserve a big diamond or sapphire or something besides an old heirloom."

"It's not the ring that matters to me; just the meaning behind it. You said yourself that this ring is for your wife so let your future wife wear it as her engagement ring."

"So controlling," he said sarcastically. He held the ring between his fingers, studying it for a few moments before meeting my eyes again. "You know, this whole experience and these past few days have been a fairytale enough. I don't need to make a big speech because I already know you love me. Today was just an example of how much you love me and I technically already agreed to tell you, so what I'm trying to say is that all I really need to do is put this ring on your finger."

"You don't need to give me a speech. You said yes; that's all I need."

He smirked and spun the ring around. "I know Hale made you this promise at the beginning of the Selection but it's not a bad notion. I want to spend every day from now on showing you how much I love you and cherish you." He slid the ring on my finger and I giggled. _I giggled_. That's what being around Eikko did to me.

"How did your parents take it?" I asked, knowing that he had gone to call them while I sorted things out with advisers.

Eikko smile. "Obviously they were a little surprised but once I told them that I had no idea it was coming either, they were excited. They want to meet you. Which reminds me…is there a possibility that the future prince consort could get a few days at home?"

"If you take security," I told him. "Why?"

"I need to sort some things out. Go get some more clothes." I started to remind me him? that he would be getting his clothes tailored from now on but he stopped me. "There are just some loose ends to tie up before I can really make myself permanent here. I need to sell my apartment, get clothes, say goodbye to some friends…"

"And then you and your parents can come here," I told him. "We can get your parents a house outside the city like my dad did for Grandma. Then they can be close."

For the first time, Eikko actually frowned. He was truly perplexed. "I don't think they'd want to move here."

"What do you mean? Why wouldn't they want to move here?"

"Because they have their own lives back at home. They have jobs and friends and a community."

I shook my head. "Eikko, I didn't mean that they should just drop everything."

"What are they going to do here though, Eadlyn? They're happy where they are. They were ready for me to leave home and have a job and everything. I'm not a kid and I don't rely on them."

"What are you implying?" I asked in a sharp voice, drawing away from him. A small part of my mind just kept repeating _stop, stop, stop, don't ruin this moment and this day. Don't fight, not tonight._

He huffed and ran a hand through his hair. "I didn't mean it like that."

For the first time since meeting Eikko, I could see the age difference. I could see the differences in life experience. In that moment, we weren't just Eadlyn and Eikko. We were Eadlyn the princess and Eikko the commoner. But surely we weren't the only ones who had this problem. Mom came from a much more troubled background than Eikko; she must to have had more culture shock. "I don't want to fight," I whispered.

"Me neither," he answered in a low voice. "I'll talk to my parents. It was wrong of me to assume that they would have no interest in coming here. They very well could."

"And you wouldn't mind? Them remaining in Kent while you're here?"

He shrugged and leaned back on one of his hands. "I don't need my parents the same way you do. And I don't mean that as an insult at all. I lead a different life than my parents. I'm actually a little jealous of how close you are to your mom and dad."

"Well, we'll see how jealous you are when we're married and they're still living right down the hall from us," I said sardonically, cringing at the thought. "When do you think you'd like to go?"

"Soon. The sooner I leave, the sooner I come back," he said, kissing the back of my hand. I detested the thought of him leaving when the country was somewhat precarious and the peoples' attitudes toward us were still to be determined but I knew that General Leger would send only the best men with him.

"I can't argue with that," I said, leaning forward to kiss him lightly. Still unnerved by our minor argument though, I pulled away quickly. "When you get back, we should do something fun. Like a fun date."

He smiled again, his eyes lighting up to their normal enthusiasm. "Okay. Any ideas?"

"I'll think of something," I promised. I leaned against his shoulder. Slowly he slid to the ground and I rested my head over his heart, listening to it pound through my ear. The sound of his heart was one of the most precious sounds in the world to me. Aside from my mother humming or Ahren's laugh, I could never feel more grounded than I did while listening to his heartbeat, strong and healthy under my cheek.

The Great Room was back to just being filled with my family the next morning. Except this time, there was an extra seat set at the head table. Henri explained that he would leave before breakfast, not wanting to disturb us and just looking to go back to his family and his kitchen. I made Eikko translate to him that he really did have to make our wedding cake, as a direct order from his queen. Kile was eating breakfast with his family separately, no doubt enjoying his last few days with them before leaving.

Eikko and I walked hand-in-hand into the Great Room and sat down across from my parents, Osten and Kaden at either end. I tried to cover up how sore my neck and back were from sleeping on the hard ground all night and I could see from the circles under Eikko's eyes that he didn't sleep very well either but we shared a secret smile with each other as we sat down.

Mom winked at me as she cut into the tart in front of her, making me blush. Dad glanced up from his eggs, looking carefully between myself and Eikko. "I hope you're both well-rested," Mom said. "Things are going to be getting pretty intense from here on out. Gavril will want to start getting things ironed out for the wedding."

"I have some ideas for your constitutional monarchy," Dad said. "That is, if you are willing to accept my input."

"Of course," I agreed. My elbow bumped Eikko's as we both reached for waffles. I drew my hand back and he plopped two on my plate, passing me the syrup and butter. "What were you thinking?"

"I like the idea of town halls but they would need to be redone…reformatted. As queen, it's too dangerous to put you in a room full of disgruntled citizens, no matter what the atmosphere is in the country."

I nodded in agreement. "Kile had some ideas about that as well, actually. He talked about redesigning the Throne Room into more of an attending room where people could come in one by one and voice their concerns."

"Exactly!" Dad said enthusiastically. "I was thinking that with thirty-five provinces, we could designate three per month, with the one month holding two being a month of your choosing. Your mother and I used to do something similar after the dissolution of the castes; we brought in specific citizens and told them in the Throne Room that they were casteless and let them choose their jobs. It worked quite well but as the workload increased and concerns decreased, the necessity for those meetings diminished."

"You know, Dad, I'm looking for people to offer input on the constitution we're drafting. I know you and Mom are supposed to be taking time off work, technically, but I would really like to have you two included. You've always been good at giving voices to the voiceless," I said to them.

Mom pressed a hand to her mouth and looked at Dad, pleading for him to agree. "Love, we should really consider. Perhaps with your health we should just go ahead and take that time off we've been discussing."

"Maxon?"

"Hmm?"

"I'm helping with this constitution," she said firmly, leaving no room for argument.

Dad sighed and relented. Kaden piped up from the other end of the table. "You know, Eadlyn, I can do some reading into the United States Constitution. Find out what it really contained and read it through maybe. Then I can help you get a clearer idea of what you should have in yours."

"I really like the sound of that Kaden. Thank you," I told him earnestly.

"I can help too!" Osten exclaimed, making us all groan.

"What are you going to do, honey?" Mom asked, her eyes sparkling.

Osten considered for a few moments and then nodded, as if deciding something in his mind. "I can be the scribe!"

We all laughed loudly, none of us following the rules of table decorum whatsoever. "He does have the best handwriting of the whole family," I informed Eikko under my breath, making him laugh even more.

Mom addressed Eikko. "I wish I could tell you, Erik, that not every meal in our home surrounds matters of diplomacy but I would be lying if I did," she told him.

Eikko waved a hand at her. "It's quite alright, Your Majesty. It's refreshing, really. It's my opportunity to get caught up on everything I'll be helping my future wife with." He lifted my hand to his lips as Osten pretended to gag on his scrambled eggs.

"Osten," Mom said in a warning voice. She turned back to Eikko. "Seeing that my husband and I won't be taking to retirement completely over the coming months, perhaps he could help you get acquainted to everything? That way Eadlyn can stay focused on the present issues at hand."

"I would love to do it," Dad assured him.

I met Eikko's eyes, silently urging him to take the offer. After all, I learned from my father. He was an excellent and patient teacher and that would only be amplified now that he wouldn't be actively working while teaching. "Sure. I mean, yes, Your Majesty."

"Honestly, Erik, call me America," Mom told him, rolling her eyes.

"I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that quite yet," he admitted bashfully.

"Mrs. Schreave?"

He nodded. "Yes. That's much better."

A butler entered with the day's papers on a tray, going in my father's direction but faltering when I waved at him to stop. "Sorry Daddy. You're working on the constitution but that's it. No more morning papers to fret over," I told him.

"Damn," he muttered. He looked to the butler. "Travers, you heard your queen. Take those papers back. Give them to General Leger; he could always use some more reading material." Mom shook her head at Dad.

I glanced at my watch and sighed. "I should get going. I'm sure I have quite a bit of damage control to see to today," I announced to the table. "Dad, can I leave Eikko in your care?"

"Of course. We'll take excellent care of your fiancé. We'll take him on the full tour of the palace, show him all of the best secrets and all of the places of your most embarrassing moments," Dad promised.

"Great. Sounds like a plan." I kissed Eikko on the cheek, my lips lingering a few moments longer than necessary. "I'll get everything arranged for your trip. Do you still want to leave tonight?" He nodded, squeezing my knee under the table. "Two nights, okay? Not a second longer."

"Not a second longer," he confirmed.

I pulled away from him and walked out of the Great Room, still smiling and remembering the feeling of his lips on mine, going headfirst into the future that was awaiting me.


	2. Chapter 2

I barely slept the next night. Eikko had left around eight so that he could sleep through the night on the flight back to Kent and be up early for the morning. After having the luxury of sleeping with him the night before, it seemed impossible to do by myself. Instead I found myself sitting in my study, reading through the packets of information Kaden had found for me on constitutional monarchies. Part of me wished that I had explained myself more thoroughly on the Report when I announced it, especially after hearing the advisers voice their complaints. But I wasn't that concerned about any complaints they had; they were really just worried that they would be losing their jobs.

I also wasn't ready to give up on being queen either. There had to be a way for me to stay in power and to split everything with a prime minister. After all, this was all supposed to make my people more accessible to me. I could do that by revamping the town hall meetings. I really just needed to find a way of giving the people a voice. And did I want to have a Parliament or Congress? Did a Prime Minister necessitate a parliamentary body? _Eadlyn, you've officially bitten off more than you can chew_ , I thought bitterly. Why on earth did I announce this decision on live television? Why didn't I think first? Maybe if I had, I would be able to pretend that I never made this decision and no one would know and I could keep things just the way they were. Then I could work on this quietly from the inside without the country breathing down my neck, demanding answers. The one thing that was absolutely true in all of it was that our current way of ruling wasn't working. Maybe from within the palace it looked fine but on the outside, I now knew it was a very different story.

Mom and Dad dissolved the castes, thinking that would solve everything. In reality, the castes weren't the problem. Being a Two wasn't enough to save you from getting thrown in jail for being pregnant without being married. Being a Six didn't mean that you had to be poor but it certainly kept you from being able to afford what would help save money, like contraception or land to grow your own food. The castes helped bring people together for a moment but there always had to be someone on the bottom. Now that there wasn't a system determining that, everyone was fighting to not be at the bottom of the social and economic ladder.

It all boiled down to the fact that there were still rules put in place by a power-hungry tyrant named Gregory Illéa. A power-hungry tyrant who thought that the easiest way to maintain order was to manipulate people, a notion perpetuated by every Illéan sovereign after Gregory until my dad. There was still a great deal of inequality simply between genders. Mom and Dad only thought about amending the laws of inheritance after I was born; they didn't consider making everything equal for men and women. No wonder people hated me so much. There I was, fulfilling a job that shouldn't have been mine in the first place - courtesy of my lack in Y chromosome - while my citizens lacked that same opportunity. The castes were a step in the right direction, but there was still a lot to do to transform Illéa into a global power-house to rival other leading nations.

At least Dad would be there to help. And Kaden. At the same time though, this was going to be my project. Mom and Dad reformed society, I would reform humanity. This would be my legacy. I didn't want to burden them by having to help me when they were supposed to be relaxing. I wanted to show everyone that I could undertake this massive project and not hold my father's hand through it. I maybe had only been queen for several days and I had no idea what the future held. If I wanted to make changes, I needed to do it right away, especially with Marid breathing down my neck.

Marid. I had no idea what I would be doing with him. He was just another item on a rapidly growing list of things I needed to get done as soon as possible. He would retaliate; he wasn't going to let me get away with what I had done. My hope was that my engagement would abate the rumors surrounding our forbidden affair – even if the people were upset over my choosing a man who wasn't a suitor, but that could just add fuel to the fire surrounding my engagement. My other hope was that I valued my people and their concerns and had a deep desire to bridge the gap between the monarchy and everyone else.

The phone on my desk rang and I had never answered the phone faster, looking for any excuse to give my mind a break. "Queen Eadlyn," I answered curtly.

"Is it customary for the Queen of Illéa to answer her own office phone? Here I was expecting to have to go through half a dozen secretaries."

I let out a long breath, running a hand down my face. "Eikko, you have no idea how glad I am to hear your voice right now."

"Funny, I was hoping I wouldn't hear you. You should be sleeping, love."

My whole body seemed to melt into my chair at the endearment. "I'm stressed. Can't sleep."

"I'm starting to get the impression that you never sleep," he said.

"Did you at least sleep on the flight?"

"Somewhat. The bed was comfortable. I daresay that bed was more comfortable than any bed I've ever owned and it's on a plane! If you were a brat, I wouldn't be able to blame you for it if this is how you grew up," he joked. "Want to talk about it?"

I appreciated the fact that he didn't ask me what was stressing me. After all, he knew everything that was stressing me. I had to resist the urge to say no. I didn't want to unload on him when he was technically supposed to be home worrying about his own life but he did ask and if he was going to be my prince consort - and ultimately, my husband - I had to learn to share the stress with him, just like Mom and Dad did. Besides, I couldn't voice any of my doubts to Lady Brice or Dad. Eikko was my only option and my best option. "I'm second guessing myself with this constitutional monarchy. I just don't know what I'm going to do or how I'm going to do this…how I'm going to pull this off."

"Well, you will do it. It will be hard and you're going to continue to second guess whether or not you're doing the right thing but with all great changes comes great discomfort. Unfortunately, you're the one taking the brunt of that discomfort," he said lightly.

I smiled. Somehow he knew exactly not what would soothe me but what I needed to hear. "Thanks Eikko," I said softly. "I'm sorry to unload on you when you're heading home. At least, I'm assuming you're calling to say that you've landed."

"Yeah, I'm on my way to my parents' house now. I really didn't think I'd get an answer from you."

"Well I'm glad you called anyway," I said sincerely.

"I'm glad I called too."

I slouched down in my chair, exhaustion suddenly claiming me. "How does a pool sound?"

"A pool?" he repeated.

"I've always wanted one but Dad said no. Now that I have control over the palace's renovation funds, I am considering putting one in. I know just the place for it. I need something fun to work on outside of everyday diplomacy, just to break up my day."

"Wow. A pool," he mused. "You command it and they build it, huh?" Nothing about the way he said it sounded accusatory at all. He was simply in awe.

"Something like that." I paused before saying, "I wish I could go home with you. Meet your parents, spend time in your community…see where you grew up. I really wish I was there it's just…"

He finished for me. "You have to run the country. You'll meet them."

"My parents will want to meet them," I added. "Preferably before the wedding."

He chuckled and I could see him shaking his head to himself. "Never thought I'd have to tell my parents that the king and queen would want to meet them. I never really thought that I would be marrying the queen."

I rolled my eyes. "You thought about it."

"I thought about marrying the _princess_ ," he said. We both were quiet, just enjoying the sound of each other's voice on the other side of the line. Finally he yawned and said, "I'm almost home."

"I'm not sure how much we'll be able to talk these next few days," I said honestly. "There's just so much to do. I promise I'll try to call at least once a night."

"Eadlyn, don't stress about it. I already miss you like crazy but I understand if you're busy. I shouldn't be your top priority right now."

I bit my lip. "I want you to be my top priority."

"I know I'm Eadlyn's top priority. I can respect that I'm not Queen Eadlyn's top priority." He sighed again. "I love you, Your Majesty."

"I love you too." He took one last deep breath before hanging up the phone. Just like that, I was no longer wide-awake. Closing the folders on my desk, I left the study and wandered back down to my room. I wished more than anything that I could have at least had a picture of Eikko to look at while falling asleep. My eyes flashed open and I ran over to my closet, ripping open the drawer of my favorite keepsakes. The picture of us from my coronation was there, tucked safely inside. I gently leaned it against the lamp beside my bed, laying on my side so that his smile was the last thing I saw before sleep closed my eyes.

* * *

Lady Brice poured me a cup of coffee and placed it in front of me. "There's still plenty of support for Marid out there. You're a smart girl, you must know that while you're engaged, getting engaged to a suitor who wasn't officially in your Selection confuses people. The people are happy for you but they have no attachment to Erik; they don't know him. We need to get you two in the studio these next couple days and do some interviews with Gavril so that they can get acquainted with him."

I frowned, knowing that I had committed a major fraud against her. "Um, Eikko actually won't be back for another few days."

She blinked at me and then nodded, brushing her hair back from her face. "That's okay. We'll sort something out. We'll figure it out." She snapped her fingers and started pacing as she thought things through. Now that I knew they were related, I didn't know how I could ever miss the fact that she was my father's half-sister. They shared so many mannerisms and even slightly resembled each other. They had the same blonde hair and strong facial features, the same excited light and determination in their eyes as they worked through a tough problem.

The head architects and designers of the palace came in then, answering my call from earlier that morning. They all had blueprints in their arms and various notebooks and bags of pens and pencils. "Your Majesty," the head architect greeted, bowing deeply.

"Thank you for coming Mr. Robs. Have a seat and we can discuss what I'm looking for." His men sat around my desk as I told them my ideas for the pool, all of them taking notes vigorously and one of them even starting a working design for it. After our meeting was over they moved over to another part of the study and continued working with the notes I had given them. This would be the first major renovation since my parents renovated the third floor before Ahren and I were born. They completely redid their wing to make more of a familial atmosphere, connecting all of our rooms with a common family room.

General Leger came in then with some other advisers, wanting to discuss Marid. "He's still at it," General Leger reported to me, helping himself to some of the coffee on my desk. "This morning he announced that your engagement to Erik was forced on you by the palace in order to stop the rumors of him proposing."

He wasn't wrong but he also wasn't completely right. "That only makes him look like the bad guy," I reasoned.

"Yes, but it also paints the palace in a bad light. It doesn't matter if his name is dragged through the mud in order to bring down the palace. You are more important, anything scandalous concerning you will always trump his wrongdoings in the rumor mills," Sir Rasmus said.

I rubbed my face with both hands. "What do we do? We need to shut him up."

"I'm still for killing him," General Leger said darkly but not dark enough to be actually serious.

"That'd just do more harm than good. It would make it look like we're censoring him and if we're trying to improve relations with Illéa's citizenry, killing such a popular spokesman for speaking out against us will do nothing to help that. Has he said anything yet about the constitutional monarchy?" I asked Lady Brice.

She shook her head. "But he will. He'll surely find some way to make this sound like a red herring for getting more control over the people or something like that. That's why the sooner we get an official statement out, the better. Right now, any response, positive or negative, is only speculation."

"We need to speak with Gavril's team then and start drafting a statement. We need to give the people something," General Leger said. "Right now, all they know is that their whole system of government could be changing. That's scary if you think about it. And with them already being restless…"

"Not good," I sighed. "Okay. First step toward that would be setting up the full team of people who will work on this constitution. Lady Brice, General Leger, both of you are obviously going to be there. Neena, I'll need you as well."

"Your parents, Your Majesty?" Neena asked, writing down the names furiously.

"Of course. They agreed to it yesterday," I told them. "Erik, of course. I'd also like Kaden to be part of it."

Lady Brice pursed her lips as she listened to the list. "Are you sure about this list, Your Majesty? I understand that these are the people you trust most but it is comprised of mostly family and friends. It could look suspicious."

"We can invite some mayors and governors, as well. I'll get a completely drafted list of people I would like to help. Camille and Queen Nicoletta could even help," I added. "I want this team full of women so that the people can know what to expect in the future." Neena and Lady Brice smiled at that. "Just, not Mayor Warren from Calgary."

We were so wrapped up in our discussion that I didn't notice Mom had come in until she was standing right in front of me. "Mer, what are you doing in here?" General Leger asked her, narrowing his eyes at her.

She ignored him and addressed me. "Eadlyn, I have a proposition for…what are the palace architects doing in here?" she suddenly asked, noticing the group huddled in the corner of the study.

"Drafting blueprints for the pool," I answered nonchalantly.

"What pool?"

"The pool I'm getting installed."

She frowned. "Did your father say you could do this?"

"Dad doesn't have exclusive control over our recreational money anymore. You guys never used it on vacations to the beach; I'm using it to bring the beach to us." She winced and I felt guilty. It wasn't her decision to not take us to the beach and I knew it was wrong of me to hold that against them, especially now that I knew the reason behind their refusal. She had to have known Dad had told me about it though. They didn't keep any secrets from each other. Briefly I wondered when Mom learned about his scars and Lady Brice.

"Where is it going? You're not putting it in the gardens, are you?" There was a bit of worry in her voice because the gardens were her special place. Well, her and Dad's. If the two of them were ever missing within the palace, it was most likely that they could be found on this one bench in a secluded corner of the gardens.

"No. We're redesigning the south wing conservatory. It's hardly used and we can design it so that it can be used in the summer by opening the glass ceiling. Similar to the football stadium in Kent," I explained.

She blinked at me, the football reference going directly over her head. "Fine, just leave some money for us for retirement." General Leger choked back a laugh. "Something funny, Aspen?"

"No, no," he said. "Just, Mer, do you even know what retirement is?"

"I know that I can still wring your neck when I'm retired," she snapped at him but her eyes were mischievous.

I set my pen down in front of me with a loud tap, grabbing their attention once again. "Mom, what brought you in here?"

"Oh, right! I have a proposition for you. I know you're really busy with all of these reforms and getting the government settled so why don't I just plan your wedding for you?"

I tried hard to bite back my smile but in the end it came out as more of a grimace. "You're not planning my wedding for me," I said in a firm voice.

"That's actually a really decent offer, miss," Neena said quietly.

I ignored her for the moment and focused on Mom. "You are not planning my wedding," I repeated. "Yes, its busy right now but I'll find time."

"Okay," she said with a shrug.

"Wait, you're giving up that easily?"

She sighed. "I'm not going to force you to do something that you don't want to do."

My mouth dropped open. "What would you call the Selection?"

"You're right, but look at how well that turned out!"

"I chose a guy that wasn't even competing. It worked great."

"Leave it to you to find a way around the rules even when you're forced to play by them," she said with a small shake of her head. "But I see your point."

"I see that you're trying to use reverse psychology on me and it's making my head hurt. Don't you have other things to do today, like keep Dad occupied?"

She smiled wickedly. "Oh, honey, we can't stay in our bedroom all day."

I smacked my hands over my ears as Neena, General Leger, and Lady Brice all laughed. "Okay, okay! Please leave before you embarrass me even more!"

"Admit it, you're glad I didn't die," Mom said sarcastically as she walked out, making me roll my eyes.

"If this is how she'll be for the next twenty years or so while she's retired and I'm here working, I might have to send her back across the country to Carolina," I said to General Leger.

He smiled and took a seat across from me. "She'll calm down once she gets grandkids."

I looked to the heavens. "Great."

"Oh!" Lady Brice suddenly exclaimed, snapping her fingers again. "I've got the solution to our Erik problem!"

We all raised our eyebrows at her. "Care to share?"

"You could go to Kent!" she said enthusiastically.

General Leger threw his hands up in the air and then placed them on his hips, pacing away from her. "She's the queen of Illéa. Engaged or not, she can't just run off to Kent for a few days for the sake of boosting some ratings. Do you have any idea how much coordination it would take to get her a security team and a camera crew?"

"We could just send one photographer," Lady Brice said. "Best not to overwhelm the people with a full camera crew."

I started to agree but General Leger cut in again. "I don't think so. She is busy enough with her duties here. You just said, the country is in a somewhat precarious state right now. We can't just let her take a few days off."

As Lady Brice started her rebuttal, I wracked my brain for other options. It was a genius idea. What better way to get to know someone than see him in his home? And she was right; only a couple photographers should be there. General Leger was also right though. How could I give up a full few days of work now with my to-do list being a mile long? There wasn't even a way of prioritizing what needed to be done; it was all equally important and demanding.

"Okay, stop," I said, holding up my hand to them. I stood up so that they would have no choice but to listen to me. "I can go for half a day. That way I'm really only gone for one day. We can make it a surprise so that what we lack in time spent with Eikko, we make up for in sappy photographs and quotes." Lady Brice and General Leger engaged in a silent argument, trying to see who could stare the other down more. "General Leger can come," I added as more persuasion for him.

He let out a long breath. "But who's going to be in charge here?" he asked me.

"Lady Brice," I said decisively, knowing that she would happily shoulder the kingdom for the day. "And Dad, if she needs help."

"I won't," she said, lifting her chin with confidence.

General Leger sighed again, drumming his fingers against my desk. "Do either of you understand the amount of security we'll have to arrange for this? Sharpshooters, spies, armed guards…not to mention the armored vehicles we'll need for transportation and the emergency responders there on site." He fixed his green eyes on me. "You're the queen. It's not like you can just go out for a stroll down the road."

"Lady Brice, Neena, could you both give us some space please?" I asked them in a cool voice.

My girls backed away and retreated to the far corner of the study, no doubt discussing what I would be wearing for this trip. I walked around my desk and stood in front of General Leger, pulling myself up to my full height (which was sadly still several inches shorter than him).

"General Leger, I understand that this is a dangerous trip we're planning. I understand what I'm risking by daring to travel across the country and spending a full day in a non-secure location. But I am not my parents and I am not my grandparents. I have no intention of holing myself up in this palace. My people have spent long enough stuck under the thumb of this monarchy and it's ignorance of their daily struggles. I am commanding you to put together a security team to escort Neena and myself to Kent tomorrow. This is not the last time I will be venturing beyond these walls so I suggest that you get used to this commandment. I am aware of the stress this puts on your job to ultimately keep me alive and functioning as queen but it only adds stress to my job if I spend my days tucked away in this study, guessing at what my people need. This is my edict. Can I trust you to obey or do I need to search for a new commanding general?" I spoke slowly in a low voice, making sure he understood the gravity of what I was telling him.

He swallowed and bowed his head. "As you wish, my queen," he said in a level voice. He exited the study swiftly, Lady Brice and Neena watching with wide eyes.

I took my seat behind my desk again. "So, Neena, we have an important matter to discuss about this trip," I informed her.

"Yes, Your Majesty?" she asked, sitting down across from me.

"What _am_ I going to wear?"

* * *

Neena brushed some last-minute powder across my nose and forehead as we waited for the go ahead for the plane's door to open. "Kent has always been a large supporter for your father's regime, given the favor he showed Lady Marlee during the Selection and her official pardon once he was king," Lady Brice said to me over the phone. "However, Mayor Goldsworth has been hesitant recently to implement the new tariffs with the high density of immigrants in Kent. He's worried that he'll lose favor with those citizens if he makes them pay more to import anything from their country of origin," she explained.

"So, this is also a business trip?" I asked.

"You have an appearance at a benefit concert tonight with the Kent Philharmonic Orchestra for orphaned immigrant children," she answered in a short voice. "Your dress will be waiting for you at your hotel with Neena."

I rolled my eyes and glanced at the time. "So how long do I have with Eikko?"

"Don't worry; you have six hours," she said as if that was all the time in the world. "It's a two hour drive round trip to his community. It shouldn't take more than a couple hours to get you dressed for the concert this evening."

"Anything else?"

"Just remember that Mayor Goldsworth is powerful in the central provinces. If you get him on board for a project like drafting the constitution or even if you can get him to attend the summit for it, that could dramatically improve your odds of recruiting Midston, Sota and Allens."

I sighed, smoothing my hands against my dress. "I have a proposal for you," I told her, realizing that I had accidentally cut her off.

"Yes, Your Majesty?"

"Eikko comes with me tonight," I said. "You want the public to get used to him? Let them see him at an event at my side. It will reinforce his place by me."

"That's a great idea. We'll contact a tailor in Curran with his measurements to get him a suit for the evening that will match your dress." There was some shuffling on her side of the line and she said, "Okay, Eadlyn, they're ready for you."

General Leger stepped out of the plane first and stood at the bottom of the steps, shadowing me as I approached the black sedan waiting for us on the tarmac. I heard him introduce himself to the local security detail for Mayor Goldsworth while I took my time waving to the press lined up by the fence. The bright plains sun burned my eyes but as this was my first domestic trip since becoming queen – and an engaged queen at that – I understood that I needed to look professional, thus restricting me from wearing sunglasses. My smile became more forced as I approached Mayor Goldsworth, remembering how Dad always complained about how horrible his handshake was.

"Your Majesty," he greeted, bowing to me. I nodded cordially to him and extended my hand, figuring I just needed to get it over with.

His clammy hand wrapped around mine like a vice. I really hoped he didn't see me wince. Quickly I said, "Thank you for having me in Kent, Mayor." I tried to pull my hand away but he kept holding on.

"It is an honor, Queen Eadlyn. May I be the first to offer my congratulations to you on your recent engagement," he said warmly. He was really a fine looking gentleman with wavy golden hair and rugged skin. Apparently while there were castes, he was a farmer but following the dissolution of the castes he became a powerful spokesperson for those trying to climb the socioeconomic ladder.

He was still holding my hand though. "Thank you, Mayor Goldsworth. I look forward to further discussing our future as leaders in this same nation. I am also excited for this evening. My mother has always said that you have one of the best orchestras here in Kent." Finally he released my hand. I folded my hands behind my back, stretching my fingers to hopefully regain feeling quickly. General Leger wasn't fooled though. He coughed back a laugh as he escorted me to the car waiting.

"That is quite the compliment coming from your mother. I heard she is quite the accomplished musician herself."

"If you say that to her, she will undoubtedly deny it and say that she plays only a few different instruments," I joked. "Because apparently being able to play multiple instruments is the pinnacle of mediocrity. I can't even speak the native language of my fiancé."

Mayor Goldsworth laughed out loud. I was jealous of the mayors. They never had to follow any rules of decorum. The mayor of Allens was known for cheating on his wife and the mayor of Paloma had his own brand of tequila. Mayor Goldsworth spent his childhood working and playing in cornfields; I spent mine in tea rooms. "You are very brave for simply attempting to learn Finnish," he said easily. "It was a pleasure to greet you here, albeit somewhat brief. We should catch up tonight at the concert. Any beer you like, I will order it for you."

I smiled politely and stopped beside my car. "Thank you, Mayor Goldsworth but I am more of a champagne girl myself."

"I'll keep that in mind," he promised.

I climbed into the backseat and arranged my skirt carefully to avoid it being wrinkled when I exited the car an hour from then. General Leger sat next to me in the car, passing me a packet to read through. "This is the most recent contract drawn up between your father and Mayor Goldsworth," he explained.

I thumbed through it, my eyes growing wider as the page numbers hit triple digits. "Any chance you have the summary of events here, General?"

He chuckled and said, "Yes, but only because I thought you'd ask me that very question. Short version is this: Kent is the top corn producer in the country, as well as dairy products, cheese in particular. Most of their crop is reserved and distributed throughout Illéa – almost seventy-percent – while the other thirty percent is traded with other nations, primarily New Asia and North Africa. Now, because of the tariffs from those two countries and the taxes placed on the importation fees, farmers here aren't getting what they feel is deserved. Things are better now than they were twenty years ago when King Clarkson was reigning. As King Maxon has been able to negotiate better trade deals with New Asia, he's been able to renegotiate these contracts here in Kent."

He reached over and skipped to a chart breaking down the annual production of corn and dairy products from Kent and how it is divided, along with the financial value of each division. "Who knew my father spent so much time talking about milk and cheese?" I asked sarcastically.

"Well the tension also comes from the increasing amount of immigrants residing in Kent, particularly the refugees from New Asia and North Africa," General Leger continued.

There had been wars being fought periodically in North Africa for the last century but Illéa was never involved, their primary war always being with New Asia. The wars in North Africa were all civil wars anyway and Gregory, Porter and Clarkson were all reluctant to engage in civil wars. Dad agreed but not because he didn't want to help the country; he claimed that involvement in civil wars just got messy with picking sides. For now, he said all we could do to assist was continue shipping them what they needed for food so their citizens wouldn't starve. Dad made sure to emphasize that the only reason to intervene would be if their president was in danger of being usurped. As a neutral country, citizens of North Africa came to us for sanctuary if they could afford it.

"Kent was always one of the best places to find a job in Illéa. With the main industry being agriculture, people always need farm hands. However, as more immigrants started their own farms they realized that their revenue from their production wasn't necessarily equal. Then the castes were dissolved and those immigrants – whose qualifications fit nothing aside from manual labor – had nothing to do but farm. Now all there is left for them to do in Kent is farm."

"So they're the primary voices in the tax complaints for agriculture?" I guessed. "Well, this is messy."

"It'd be wrong of me not to inform you that many advisers are excited about the prospect of Sir Erik being a first-generation Illéan from Kent for this very reason," he said.

I chewed on my lip and flipped over to stats on immigration and annual incomes nationally and how they compared to the local incomes in Kent. "Of course they are. If anyone has a strength, they will find it and beat it until it's dead at their feet," I mumbled, skimming through quickly. General Leger coughed, grabbing my attention to see his frown. "Okay, a little morbid, sorry. But you can't deny it."

"No, I can't, unfortunately. I watched them do it to your mother when she first became queen, using her as a chess piece to connect to the lower castes before they were dissolved. Then again when they needed to boost approval ratings and suddenly all they wanted to do was film nursery specials and talk about you two. Advisers come and go but they never really change."

"Well, hopefully once our advisers are appointed by the people and not by the sovereign, we won't have that issue. Not that Dad was wrong…" It had been a worry plaguing my mind for the last forty-eight hours since announcing my plans for a constitutional monarchy. As if my telling him to retire wasn't bad enough, now I was essentially reframing the government based off of his shortcomings as a king.

General Leger waved a hand at me. "You're your own queen. You have no duty to uphold any values he did. And he gets that. He based his reign off the mistakes of those who came before him, you're doing the same. It'd be wrong if you didn't."

"Thanks," I said softly. "I'm sorry about yesterday."

"If you knew how many lectures I've received from your mother, you'd know that you barely touched her level of vicious. Never underestimate a redhead," he said as his phone started ringing in his pocket. "Hello?...Yes, we just left…Just briefing her on the latest trading and tax contracts…of course...He what?!...Of course, of course. Here she is." He passed me the phone. "Lady Brice."

I frowned, my stomach tensing with what I knew was going to be bad news. "Can't even manage the palace for half a day without me?" I asked, trying to make my tone light.

Lady Brice wasn't amused though. "Marid's started talking. And it's not pretty."


	3. Chapter 3

The sedan stopped in front of a nondescript, U-shaped rancher. Most of the homes on the block were white or gray on the outside, all of them uniform with trimmed lawns that lacked any true landscaping. It seemed like such a desolate place to grow up. No color, no excitement, no deviation from the norm. Was this what it was like in all immigrant communities?

The ends of the U were closest to the road but there weren't any large windows to see through on the ends so there was no way of me knowing if anyone was home. I figured we wouldn't come all this way without someone calling to check that Eikko would be here in the first place. The U was connected by a five-foot wall of shiplap wood with a gate in it, no doubt leading to the front door.

"I like it," General Leger said, nodding in approval as he took it in. "Secluded, no easy second entrances or ways to sneak around…I feel slightly better about you being here." He winked at me. He was trying to make me feel better but I was still preoccupied by my last conversation with Lady Brice.

"I'm sure you do," I mumbled, craning my neck to get a better look. There was a car in the driveway, at least. Coming from the palace, I couldn't begin to imagine what it was like to grow up in such a small house. The reality was though that these houses weren't really that small. On the way into the neighborhood, General Leger explained that many of these houses were larger than Mom's was growing up and most definitely larger than his. And to think Mom came from a family with five kids. Seven people fitting in a house smaller than the ones I was looking at…it seemed unfathomable. There were days where I felt like I couldn't get far enough away from my brothers and we had the whole palace.

The wooden gate opened and Eikko emerged, frowning in confusion as he took in the caravan of unmarked black sedans and SUVs parked in front of his house. I recognized some veiled hope in his eyes and it took everything in me to not jump out of the car and run into his t-shirt clad arms.

One of the guards gave the all-clear for General Leger and the photographer hid behind one of the cars to catch the surprise on camera. General Leger held the car door open for me and even held my hand as I exited the sedan, smiling widely at Eikko's shocked expression.

"What are you doing here?" he asked me breathlessly, as if I had actually taken his breath away.

I smiled even wider and approached him at what was close to a run, unable to get to him fast enough. I crashed into him, my lips meeting his. "Surprise?" I said, pulling my face away from his just enough to look into his eyes.

"Did you know about this when we spoke yesterday?"

"No. It came up yesterday afternoon." He leaned down to kiss me again, his arms wrapping around me even tighter. He smelled different, like a mix of cinnamon and teakwood. But he still smelled like Eikko. He was in jeans too and just from what I had seen so far, I would need him to wear jeans more often for my own guilty pleasure. "So now would probably be a good time for me to tell you that there's a photographer behind that black SUV taking our picture right now." His eyebrows drew together in confusion and I was quick to shake my head. "I'll explain once we get inside."

"Which you should do now," General Leger cut in. His eyes swept the street nervously. Some people were opening their front doors, alerted by the commotion on their street. "I don't like you being out in the open like this."

I nodded in agreement and settled for keeping one arm wrapped around Eikko's waist as we approached the wooden gate. "I thought you didn't take orders from anyone else," Eikko joked, nodding to General Leger.

"Trust me, I take orders from him. He answers to my dad."

"Ah. Well in that case, we should all listen."

"Number one rule of palace survival: always listen to General Leger's orders. Right, General Leger?"

"You haven't broken any bones yet, Your Majesty," he confirmed. "I'm trying for a perfect record by retirement."

The gate creaked as Eikko opened it for me, sweeping me inside with General Leger on my heels. "My parents will be thrilled at meeting you, even if they didn't get a warning to clean the house," he said.

"Believe me, even the palace can get messy at times. You just don't see it," I told him.

"Must be all the gold and marble. It distracts one from seeing any messes."

I laughed and nodded. "Remind me to point out the stain that is still in the third floor carpet from when Osten had too many éclairs at Kaden's twelfth birthday party."

"Oh, I will not forget that!" Inside the wooden gate was a small courtyard with a little wooden table and two chairs, strings of lights strung just above us to join the roofs on either side. In front of us was a wall of windows looking into the living area of his parents' home. Through those windows I could see his parents standing over the counter, cooking something while chatting. They were both beautiful people, making it difficult to discern from whom Eikko had received his good looks. "Queen Eadlyn, welcome to my home," he said in a grandiose voice but I could hear how nervous he was with the way it shook slightly.

"Thank you, Sir Eikko," I said graciously, allowing him to open the front door for me and sweep an arm to welcome me inside.

His parents both turned to look at me when I walked in. "Your Majesty," his mother said, dropping into a deep curtsy. His father bowed at the waist, neither of them moving from their poses. Both of them had suntanned skin, their faces clearly weathered by being outside all day but not in a way that made them unattractive. They really were quite gorgeous in an exotically rugged way.

Eikko and I exchanged a quick glance after a few moments went by. "Okay, you guys can get up now," he said to them. "You realize I'm royalty now too, right?" he asked, stepping further to help usher me inside.

His mother walked around the counter and curtsied again right in front of me. "Queen Eadlyn, I'm Ilona. Eikko said you are not comfortable with Finnish. Call me Lennie."

"Lennie?" I repeated to make sure I was correct. It was so different from Ilona.

"Ilona, Helen, Lennie," Eikko explained, sensing my confusion.

"Oh! Lennie, okay."

She smiled timidly and moved out of the way for Eikko's father who was no taller than me. He offered me a firm handshake.

"Aulis," he said in a short voice.

"Al," Eikko whispered in my ear, getting him a thumbs-up from his dad.

I nodded and smiled. "Eadlyn. I don't really have a nickname. My name is obscure enough, no sense adding a nickname for more confusion." His parents laughed uneasily, as if they were unsure whether or not I was really making a joke.

"We are having lunch. Will you have some?" Lennie asked, her blue eyes wide and imploring.

"I'm starving. That'd be great. I apologize if I am a bit overdressed," I said, starting to feel awkward in my custom-tailored day dress from the palace.

"You're good," his mother said busily.

His parents went back to the counter to continue prepping lunch, giving me the opportunity to look around Eikko's home. The cabinets in the kitchen were painted a magnificent teal blue with a large white, pink and teal carpet beneath our feet. The living room was dominated by a coral sofa with white and gray accent pillows with a plain, scrap-wood dining table connecting the kitchen to the living area. There were shelves on one wall containing what I assumed were treasures from Swendway. The far wall of the living and dining rooms was also made of glass, giving me a view of the lush backyard.

"Want a tour?" Eikko asked from over my shoulder, placing his hand on my back.

I nodded up at him. "Sure."

Rather than walking into the living area like I suspected he would, he took me down the small hallway and through a door to what I assumed was his bedroom. The walls were a royal blue with light wood floors. His bed has a rich red and blue plaid comforter on it with rumpled up pillows. There was a suitcase open on top of it, rumpled clothes inside waiting to be packed and some other random items around it.

"You're not bringing much," I commented, turning to get a full view of his room.

"Well, let's be honest, am I going to be able to wear any of my own clothes in the palace?"

I wrinkled my nose. "Yeah, you're right." I walked over to the suitcase and saw some pictures piled on top of each other. "What are these?" I lifted the one on top, seeing a picture of a younger Eikko with his parents and some other people that looked vaguely similar to him but not enough to be siblings.

"That's from the one time we went to Swendway. Mom and Dad saved all year to buy the tickets and proper documentation in order to travel. We didn't eat out for weeks and were basically vegetarians, just eating what we grew in the yard." He laughed as if it was a fond memory but to me it sounded terrible. He clearly recognized my horror. "It wasn't as bad as it sounds. It was worth it. I got to meet my cousins face-to-face and see the village my parents came from."

"Well maybe when we go honeymooning in France, we can stop by Swendway," I proposed. "We can definitely go visit other times too." I took a deep breath and looked around his room again. "I like your room."

He raised his eyebrows dubiously. "Really? You, whose bedroom is the size of my whole house, like my bedroom."

I nodded. "Of course. It's…very you." He still looked unconvinced so I took his hands and guided him to sit on the end of his bed by me. "At first glance it looks really plain and nondescript but then as you look more and see the little things, it becomes something special. Like your bed, how you didn't make it completely shows that you're rushed but not so rushed that you don't care. And your closet? It's organized by color, showing that you are organized and also have an eye for color."

"How perceptive, Your Majesty," he said, squeezing my hand. "I really didn't finish making my bed because I didn't want to keep you waiting."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Uh-huh."

He swept some of my hair back behind me, peering at me closer. "What's going on? You're really tense, have been since you stepped out of that car. And this isn't meet-the-parents kind of tense. Something is on your mind."

"Want to talk outside?" I asked, nodding in the direction of the yard.

We stopped in the kitchen where Al had prepared fresh juice for us. "Passion fruit," he said, nodding to the yellow-orange juice.

"Thank you," I said graciously. Eikko held the door open for me as we stepped outside into the yard. "Can we review the common courtesy stuff again? Like please and thank you?"

"I'll do you one better and make you a cheat-sheet when we get back."

We sat down at a wooden picnic table underneath a large apple tree. The concrete façade of the home extended into a wall lining the yard, closing us in. Flowers and bushes lined the wall and in one corner was a small but impressive vegetable garden. General Leger stood guard by the gate to the yard that I presumed led to the road.

"How bad is it?" he asked.

I wrapped my hands around my glass of juice. "It's bad. It's Marid." Eikko blew out a frustrated breath, rolling his eyes. "He's saying that the constitutional monarchy is just a ploy for us to actually reinforce the dominance of the monarchy by putting more people between us and the citizens."

"That's stupid," Eikko said, shaking his head.

"Thank you," I said bitterly. "He's impossible. He finds a fault in everything I do and then exploits it. The PR team at the palace should get raises for all the work they're doing now because of him."

He chewed on his lip. "And we can't ignore him?"

"Sadly, no. It worked when he was just being an obnoxious ass. Now he's being a rebellious ass and taking the Illéan people with him." I shook my head, cursing myself. "I shouldn't have ever trusted the son of two of the most powerful rebels in the country. They say they support the monarchy but they can't stand this particular monarchy."

"I'm sorry." He reached a hand across the table and held mine tightly. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

"Are you free tonight?"

With a deep breath he nodded slowly. "Are we still distracting the people?"

"I'm sorry. I wish more than anything that it didn't have to be this way. Someday, in the future, people won't care about us anymore."

He raised his eyebrows. "When will that be exactly?"

I considered. "After our wedding, your coronation, six babies, and after those six babies have babies of their own. That's when they'll leave us alone."

"Oh, so soon?"

"Obviously."

Lennie slid open the back door and smiled at us. It didn't quite reach her eyes though, making her appear tense. "Lunch is ready," she told us.

We walked inside, Eikko whispering to me, "Her English is okay but my dad's is rather limited. He's comfortable with me as a translator though so if you have anything to say or vice versa…" he offered.

"Thanks," I said, squeezing his hand and sitting beside him at the table.

"We are overwhelmed by this," Lennie said, gesturing around her. I nodded, understanding what 'this' was. I was overwhelmed by my world at times and I had eighteen years to get used to it. To go from Swendway to being the mother of the prince consort of Illéa had to be overwhelming at the least. "But happy."

"Happy," Al repeated, nodding his head vigorously. It was while looking at Al across from me that I saw how similar he looked to Eikko. It was eerie, actually.

"Where exactly do you both work?" I asked her. Eikko had very briefly explained that they ran their own produce stand in their community and his mom did other things for preserving Swendish customs.

Lennie took a drink of her juice before answering, "We own a farm a few miles from here. We sell the produce and crops to the immigration shelters," she explained.

"Mom also teaches at the shelters," Eikko said, jumping in. "She teaches parents about adjusting to the new culture and gives them resources for different things. Medical clinics, grocery stores and markets, schools…the people really love her."

She waved her hand like it was nothing. "I do my part. Nothing like what you do."

"We both work to make other peoples' lives easier," I said. "The way I see it, you're luckier than me. You get to interact with the people you help. I have to hear about it through press secretaries."

She smiled kindly and looked at Eikko. "We do have questions about our son and his future at the palace, in your family," she admitted.

"Ask away. I understand that this is all very confusing and sudden."

"Very sudden," she repeated. "Eikko was not in the Selection. Now he is the prince…prince…"

"Consort," Eikko whispered.

She nodded and smiled gratefully. "Yes, consort. We are worried."

"Worried?" Eikko and I both asked simultaneously. At least both of us were confused.

"We think you are a good girl but Eikko has only had one girlfriend before you and it was for a couple months. You two have known each other for four weeks, barely, and are now engaged to run a country together?" his mother pressed. "Again, I respect you but the Selection seemed more like a, uh, quick fix for the problems in the monarchy than something you wanted to do."

"Lennie, I love your son very much," I said seriously.

"How? I'm sorry Eadlyn. You are single one minute and in love with my son the next. I am slightly…what's the word?" she asked, snapping her fingers.

"Skeptical?" Eikko supplied. "Look, I can't explain it either. But you two have spent the last twenty years watching Queen America and King Maxon and you can't deny how much they love each other, can you? He gave up being king to care for her. They met through a Selection. And they went right into being king and queen without any help from his parents. We're in love and we have even more resources than they did. We will be fine."

Lennie shook her head as Al grew increasingly uncomfortable, either unsure of what was being said or feeling differently from his wife. "I need time to understand," she said in a short voice.

Finally Eikko exploded, sitting up straighter in his seat and putting both of his hands down flat on the table. " _Miten kehtaat sanoa, että? Minä rakastan häntä. Vain koska et ymmärrä ei tarkoita en saa minun onnelliseen. Tämä on mitä haluan._ " Was there a god I could pray to for me to suddenly be fluent in Finnish?

Lennie leaned forward, the fury in her eyes indicative of the fact that she typically wasn't talked back to by her son. " _Me vain haluamme, mikä on parasta sinulle. Olet meidän poika._ "

" _Olen aikuinen. Voin tehdä oman paatoksia. Et ollut mitaan ongelmaa muuttamisen takia, Sota._ "

"Eikko," Al suddenly barked, his voice firm and fierce. " _Kuuntele äitiesi. Ei epäkunnioitusta_."

Whatever Al said to Eikko was enough for him to back down and he slouched down slightly in his seat, bowing his head. Eikko just kept staring his mother down and then said quickly, " _Perusasiat. Olemme mutterit ja pultit._ "

Al's eyes swept my body up and down, taking me in. Then he looked to Eikko. " _Tämä un päätos_?"

" _Jaa, herra_ ," Eikko said in a strong voice.

" _Sitten menemme takaisin Svendvee_."

" _Isä_!"

Al held up a hand to stop his son's exclamation. " _Olemme tehneet työmme taallä, poika. On aika lähtea kotiin_." Lennie bowed her head and wiped her eyes but didn't argue with whatever Al was saying. I could only assume the worst.

"I will be leaving then. This afternoon," Eikko told them both.

His father nodded and I had a sinking feeling that something major had just happened between them and I had no idea what it was. What could I say to improve things if I didn't even know what had happened? I just decided to stay in my seat and remain silent.

Lennie burst into tears then, abruptly rising from her seat and taking her plate with her to the sink where she began doing the dishes. Her shoulders were hunched over the sink, shaking slightly. Al slowly followed behind her and I could just barely hear him say kindly to her, " _Omenapiirakka_."

Eikko took my hand again and led me back to his bedroom, shutting the door behind him to give us privacy. "Eikko, what just happened?" I asked him, still slightly stunned from what I had just witnessed. I had seen my fair share of advisers yelling at each other but I had never seen a family yell together so viciously. Mom and Dad hardly ever raised their voices, particularly not to us, so to sit there and watch parents and their child yell back and forth…it left me rattled.

"They're moving back to Swendway," he answered in a small voice. "Apparently now that I've secured my future, they no longer feel the need to be part of my life."

"Oh, Eikko," I said, putting my hand on his shoulder.

He shook it off. "I'm sorry. I just want to finish packing and then head back to Curran with you tonight. If that's still okay…"

"Of course." I nodded. "How can I help you?"

"Just fold that pile of clothes?" He shook his hands a few times and I noticed them trembling. I reached my hand out to hold them still, waiting for him to meet my eyes.

"It's not too late to say no. If you choose your family over me, I won't stop you. All I want is for you to be happy and if that means choosing your family over me, then do it."

Tears pooled in his eyes, making his already glassy-blue eyes look like they were floating. "Let's just get moving." It only took us twenty minutes to finish packing and for a guard to carry his luggage out to the car. General Leger offered to send guards to Sota to pack anything he wanted from his apartment there but Eikko politely declined. "My landlord called today and said that she'll personally see to it that my apartment is sold to a good owner," he explained. "Everything else I need is either here or in the palace."

Lennie and Al stood awkwardly in the kitchen as the guards did a final sweep for my exit. She seemed ready to chew of a limb if it meant Eikko staying in Kent. He approached them stiffly, extending his hand to Al. They shook, a stiff gesture that contained very little paternal attachment. Lennie fell apart in his arms though, clutching her son close and whispering in his ear furiously. I didn't get a single word of the rushed Finnish. As Eikko joined me at my side again, they both bowed and bid me farewell, saying that it was nice to meet me. I wasn't sure how sincere they were being.

Eikko was quiet the whole way to the hotel. This was not how I imagined the car ride going. I had thought that this would be a great time to talk without any interruptions. Instead, I found myself holding the trade documents in one hand and his knee in the other.

"Is there anything in that I should know?" he asked halfway into the ride, nodding to the stack of papers in my lap.

"All of it?" I questioned, wondering how on earth he was possibly going to learn everything he needed to about foreign policy. There really wasn't enough time in the Selection for the boys to start learning and be trained like Mom had been during Dad's. At least she went into it with some idea of how to host foreign guests and which fork you eat caviar with. Eikko was going in completely blind. "I recommend reading it with a large cup of coffee nearby. Or if you have trouble sleeping at night."

His mouth pulled up on one side. "Duly noted." He looked away again, his hands still trembling.

I folded down the corner of the page I was reading and slid the papers into the back pocket of the seat in front of me, clipping my pen to the front of them. Then I leaned forward in my seat and spoke to the driver. "Officer Lindon, could you please pull over and stop the vehicle?" Once the sedan was stopped on the shoulder I asked, "Now could you and General Leger please leave the vehicle? This will only be a few minutes."

They both obeyed and stood with their backs turned to the car. I knew their eyes were sweeping the whole area but we were in an open field; any enemies would be clearly visible and the guards would take care of them first. Besides, these windows were basically missile-proof.

I unbuckled and turned my body to face Eikko, both of my hands on his knee. "Talk to me," I pleaded. "Say something because right now I'm thinking that you would have been far better off without ever agreeing to marry me."

His eyebrows drew together sadly as he cupped my face. "I love you. I was willing to risk my life to love you, remember? Selfish parents could never make me regret that."

"Then why? Why are they leaving? What did I do?"

"You did _nothing_." He reached into his backpack and pulled out the same picture from before, of his whole family in Swendway. "This is my sister, Lahja. This trip to Swendway…we went there as a family of four. While we were there, she met someone and they decided to get married. It was all really fast and didn't make much sense. She was always the preferred one of the two of us but my parents knew that I would have a better future in Illéa. Even if it meant leaving my sister behind in Swendway, they came back with me. But ever since then, it hasn't been the same. Mom misses her. I knew that once I got settled here they would consider leaving."

"But the life they've built here? They do so much good. And with you as prince consort, they could do even more."

He shrugged. "That's not lost on them. They know. But they also love their daughter. Mom said some stuff back there that I'm not going to translate for you but she sees it. She sees your family and how I'll never have to want for a family again. That's why they can leave. They may be skeptical about us but your family? They trust them."

"I'm so sorry, Eikko," I whispered, not knowing what else to say. The only abandonment I had ever experienced was Ahren's but I couldn't fault him for that. Not now that I knew what it was like to be in love with someone that much. His parents though…I couldn't reconcile that. Mom and Dad would never dream of going so out of the way for one of their kids and leaving the rest of us behind. They had always treated us all equally. Well, maybe Osten got away with more but he was their fourth kid; they probably needed to give him special treatment more than he did. "We don't have to go tonight if you don't want to."

"I want to go," he said. "I just have one request."

I smiled coyly at him. "Who do you think you are, making requests of your queen?" I teased.

"I want to have fun. Take my mind off of all these problems. Can we do that?" he asked. His eyes were wide and full of desperation. How could I say no?

"We can. But we also have to work," I warned.

He leaned in to kiss me, deep and gentle. "Thank you," he breathed against my lips. I pulled him closer by the front of his shirt as his hands twisted into my hair. I threw one of my legs over his to get even closer, sighing as his lips pulled away from mine to draw a line of fire across my jaw and down my neck.

"Man, if you had kissed me like this during the Selection, I would have broken the rules a lot sooner," I whispered in his ear.

"Trust me, there's plenty more where this came from."

When I emerged from the bedroom in the hotel suite, completely decked out in my royal blue dress with my hair done up regally, Eikko looked like he could have passed out cold on the floor. His black suit and fit him almost perfectly. The pants were just a bit too short but no one would be looking at his feet, not with how captivating his eyes became while wearing his own royal blue tie.

"Wow," he said. "Is this how you're going to look all the time? Because I may never get used to it."

I winked, rubbing his shoulders lightly with my hands. "I could say the same about you. You certainly know how to clean up."

"I can't take all of the credit," he said bashfully. "Or any of it really."

"Your Majesty, we must be leaving," Neena said. "The press have gotten word of your attendance this evening. Apparently they're lining up outside the hall, waiting to get a shot of you two."

"Has Lady Brice said anything about the press from earlier today?"

Neena shook her head. "Just that she received the pictures and they look good. The palace will release them later this week with an official statement about your visit here. She's waiting to see what comes of your meeting with Mayor Goldsworth tonight."

Eikko frowned as we stepped inside the elevator with Neena and General Leger. "You're having a meeting tonight? At a concert?"

"How else do you think we royals get stuff down?" I asked him cheekily. "Why choose between work and play when you can do both?"

Sure enough, when we arrived at the hall where the concert was being held, photographers were lining the street. My guards formed a tight perimeter as soon as I was out of the car, General Leger trying to look calm as he studied the crowd across the street. The citizens there clearly weren't expecting to see me because they erupted into cheers when I lifted my hand to them in recognition. Eikko plastered a smile on his face though I could see that he was slightly overwhelmed by the attention.

I managed to recruit Mayor Goldsworth into the constitution committee, with the agreement that Dad would take him hunting while he was visiting the palace (apparently he Goldsworth was owed an afternoon hunt by my father). We also agreed to continue negotiating for his people's incomes to not be taxed so severely. I couldn't promise for no more taxes but I made it clear that there was room for negotiating.

Following the concert, Neena allowed a trusted reporter into our box so that we could answer her questions more personally. She was a reporter that the palace cleared for reporting quality stories and not just printing nonsense rumors.

The reporter's smile nearly split her face in half. "Your Majesty, congratulations on your recent engagement. Do you have any new about possible wedding plans?" she asked me enthusiastically.

I laughed. "I've only been engaged for two days!"

"Although your coronation was planned within a week. Who knows? Maybe we could be married next week," Eikko cut in with a laugh. I forced a smile. Neena and Lady Brice hadn't fully explained to him what he could and couldn't say during interviews. I was starting to regret not doing that sooner.

The reporter wrote notes furiously and then looked back up at me. "So, you have no little teasers about the dress or color scheme for the wedding?"

"Absolutely not. My wedding dress is going to be as big of a deal as a small country, if not bigger. It takes time for that."

"Sir Erik, anything to add?" she asked him.

"Whatever she wears will only make her look even more stunning," he answered. "But she's right. We've barely caught our breaths. It was such a whirlwind romance and engagement that I think we're just looking for a moment to rest a bit before planning anything."

She nodded and tucked her hair behind her ear. "And Sir Erik, as my final question, do you have any comments on the constitutional monarchy?"

My heart dropped into my stomach and I hoped I wasn't in danger of breaking his hand with as hard as I was squeezing it. "Well, I think Eadlyn is onto something incredible. She's a visionary and clearly has big plans for the country. We may not be able to see them now but I trust her as my queen to lead us in the right direction. We're looking to connect to our people and bridge the gap that divides the monarchy and everyone else. That's our ultimate goal in this."

"So the rumors that the constitutional monarchy is just a ploy to put more people between the citizens of Illéa and to further isolate the monarchy…do they have any weight?"

"It does look that way," Eikko answered before I could even open my mouth. "But it is not our intentions. Yes, it does safeguard the monarchy even more but it is not done out of animosity. I think Eadlyn just wanted to protect her family."

I groaned inwardly as the reporter wrote some last few notes. "That is all I have for the questions this evening. Congratulations again and I wish you both the best of luck."

I couldn't say anything to Eikko as we left the concert while we were still in the public eye. Admonishing my fiancé was not going to do anything for promoting our image together as a new couple and for negating those rumors spread by Marid. Even though he had essentially hijacked the interview and unknowingly undermined my power, I kept my mouth shut and reminded myself that he had no experience with interviews and that he was camera shy. When we got to the airport though and got on the plane, I still couldn't criticize him. The day's events were wearing on him visibly. His shoulders were hunched as he shrugged off his suit coat and undid his shoelaces.

I blushed as we both got ready for bed, changing into our pajamas in the master bedroom of the plane. I got the smallest glimpse at Eikko's slight, strong figure. Now that I knew how hard his parents worked with planting and growing crops, I wasn't surprised that he was in good shape. It didn't stop me from staring though. Naturally I had been wondering what was beneath his plain suits and was not disappointed. His skin had a youthful glow to it, sheathing lean muscle. He had some dark hair starting to grow on his chest and more around his navel. More than once, I caught him checking me out, not that my nightgown really kept much to the imagination.

We were quiet as we slid into bed together, sharing a quiet, slightly bashful smile. It should have been awkward but I wouldn't want to be getting into bed with anyone else. I curled up on my side, facing him while propping my head up on my elbow. My frustration from the interview earlier vanished as I watched his face slowly crumble.

"Is it always this hard?" he asked me. "Will I always have to pretend that everything is okay and that I'm completely happy?"

I kept my mouth shut as I brushed some of his black hair back. "I wish I could tell you no, that we'll always be happy and that we'll never have to pretend in front of the cameras. In reality, that's essentially all we do. But you learn how to balance duty with life. This time next year this will all seem like a bad dream."

"Except I still won't have a family," he whispered, staring up at the ceiling.

Clicking a button on the remote control by the bed, I turned the lights off the bed and then propped myself on top of his chest so that he had to look at me. "We'll be your family. When you're looking for some solace and someone to reason with, you'll have Kaden. When you need a good laugh or help with something mischievous, go to Osten. When you need a mom's hug or a father's steadfast support, you can get my parents. And when you need someone to love you more than anyone else has ever loved you, you'll have me. You'll always have me."

"Family?" His fingers threaded through mine and he absently fiddled with the ring he'd given me.

"Family," I confirmed.

He smiled slightly and sighed. "You know what family is in Finnish? _Perhe_."

"Hmm. What's wife?"

" _Vaimo_."

"And husband?"

" _Mies_."

"I like _perhe_ better."

"Me too." He put one of his arms behind his head and chewed on his lip nervously. "I'm sorry if I messed up that interview tonight. I was just trying to take the pressure off of you so that you didn't have to worry about anything else. I really just made it worse."

"It's fine," I told him. "Believe me when I say that you could have done a lot worse."

He shook his head. "But I talked about stuff I had no business talking about…"

"Eikko?" I interrupted.

"Yeah?"

" _Perhe._ "

His smile grew wider than I had seen it all night and he nodded to me. " _Perhe_."


	4. Chapter 4

_Maybe if I lie and say I have some sort of dress fitting with Eloise, I can sleep for a half hour in here and no one will even notice_ , I thought, rubbing my eyes. _No, Eadlyn, you're the queen. They always know where you are_. Eikko and I had barely slept on the plane the night before, choosing instead to spend the night talking and keeping his mind off of things. We landed in Angeles around two in the morning and snuck into my bedroom together. He finally crashed though but I was wide-awake. Suddenly I couldn't blame Dad for looking tired all the time; it was almost impossible to stop thinking about all that I needed to do.

Lady Brice walked in then with a newspaper tucked under her arm. "Good morning, Your Majesty," she said, smiling at me. I didn't miss the stress around her eyes though as she fixed herself a cup of coffee. "How was your visit to Kent?"

"You mean you haven't read all about it yet?" I asked, nodding to the paper in her arms. I recognized it as the national paper, the one distributed everywhere to the whole country.

"Well I thought I would hear about it straight from you," she said to me. "So tell me, niece." She winked, sharing a warm smile with me.

I sighed and ran my hands down my face, pinching my nose. "It was nice seeing where he grew up but his parents…" I shook my head. "I don't know how I could have won them over. They were impossible. They're wonderful people and clearly care about their community, they raised Eikko to be a gentleman. They just didn't seem impressed by the royal life."

Lady Brice pressed her lips together. "Some people don't like the spotlight. You know Erik doesn't. His parents are probably just worried."

"And I get that, I do." I paused, chewing on my lip. "They're moving back to Swendway. They're just leaving him here."

"Parents don't always do what's best for your their kids. You're lucky. Your mother and father have given their whole lives to this country but they've always saved their hearts for the four of you and more. They've always been ready to lay down their lives for everyone, even people who don't deserve it."

"I hope I can be like that too."

"You already are, ma'am." She sighed then and unfolded her paper. "Now, today you have a meeting with your mother's advisers to start discussing wedding plans and that is in ten minutes, immediately followed by your weekly meeting with advisers to check in on things. After that is lunch and a meeting with your advisers concerning the constitution. Just an easy meeting discussing the key points you want to include. At four you'll be recording an interview with Gavril with Sir Erik."

"Mayor Goldsworth gave me a verbal commitment last night to be part of the team for the constitution. I'd like to schedule a visit with him where we can iron out some new tax agreements," I informed her. "Will you be drafting the statement about my trip to Kent?"

"Gavril is, actually."

"Perfect." I fished out a fresh legal pad from my filing cabinet and followed her across the hall to the conference room where some of Mom's advisers were already gathered. As a queen consort, one of her primary responsibilities was to host foreign guests and attend to all major matters of housekeeping. She had her own panel of advisers and event planners to assist her in that work. Naturally they were now under my command but Neena had been attending to the majority of housekeeping on my behalf since becoming queen. They were crucial in planning my wedding, just like these women had been when Mom was planning her wedding. I honestly just wanted to tell them what flowers and cake flavor I wanted and leave it to them but I was only going to have one wedding and it was going to be the best damn party Illéa had ever seen.

Mom and Eikko were right behind me, both of them kissing me as they took their seats on either side of me. Mom squeezed my hand. I met her eyes, seeing just how happy she was to be here. The reality of how close we had come to losing her and her missing out on my wedding was too real in that moment. Because even though these meetings for planning were the last thing I wanted to take time out of my day for, I wouldn't want to do it without her.

In the end we settled on our wedding day being September 16, just four months away. I felt confident though that if the palace could throw together a coronation in less than a week, they could handle a wedding in four months. The ceremony would be in the cathedral that hosted every other royal wedding and coronation before me. The main reception would follow in the Great Room of the palace, the day ending with a smaller reception in the western conservatory. There was a bit of an argument over flowers (which I didn't even think we would be talking about for that meeting) but I convinced the girls to go with the Swendish national flowers, lily of the valley and purple heather.

With a light clear of her throat Mom said, "Finally, we need to discus the bridal party. Unfortunately, decorum prevents you from having bridesmaids and a full bridal party because you are queen. There are small jobs though, like spreading flower petals and keeping your train straight during the ceremony that you can designate a couple girls for."

All eyes turned to me, waiting for an answer. The truth was that I didn't have many female friends. Astra was my cousin and even she didn't really talk to me. Being an heiress was always so isolating though and there were so few women in the world in my position. The only reason Camille and I were friendly was because of Ahren. There were, however, two women without whom I wouldn't be able to function as queen. Two women that had been behind me through it all and deserved recognition for that. "Neena and Lady Brice," I said confidently. "I wouldn't want anyone else."

"Perfect," Raelynn said, writing it down. "So those involved in the procession will include Neena, Lady Brice, and King Maxon."

"And my mom," I added quickly. "I want her and Dad to walk me down the aisle."

Mom was definitely in danger of crying now. She pressed a hand to her mouth as she stared me in surprise. "Eadlyn, don't worry about it. That's your time with your father. Not to mention, it's rather unconventional."

"Mom, nothing about these past few weeks has been conventional and I want you both there. Just like it always has been." She nodded and Raelynn wrote her name down as well. By the time I left the conference room with Eikko, my head was spinning and I was in desperate need of another coffee.

"Would you like to come to my next meeting? It's going to be a real thrill, discussing money we don't have for initiatives we haven't started yet. Maybe for some added excitement you'll get to see me try to convince the advisers not to go to war with anyone," I said, feigning enthusiasm.

Eikko laughed. "It sounds tempting but your father actually offered to give me some lessons and catch me up to speed. I'll be there for your big constitution meeting." He winked. "By the way, thanks for defending my flowers."

"I really just can't stand lilies and there was no way I was going to let them be in my bouquet," I admitted. Our eyes met and we both knew instantly that we were thinking the same thing. "I have a few minutes to spare before my next meeting."

He took me by the hand and we dashed down the hall to an empty study that was available to foreign guests to use for their own work. Since we had no visitors in the palace, the study was vacant. We shut the door and were immediately in each other's arms, pulling at anything to get us closer. Eventually we fell into one of the armchairs, allowing me to stay in his lap and get as close as physically possible with clothes on. Finally he pulled away from my mouth and started kissing across my collarbone, making me shiver despite the heat coursing through my body.

Just as his lips started traveling lower I sighed and put my hands on his shoulders, pushing him back. "Sorry. I'm afraid our time is up."

"Do you have to go be queen?" he asked petulantly.

"Someone has to do it." I tugged him back up to his feet. "C'mon, you don't want to be late for my father either." Mom and Dad were down the hallway when we exited the room. Luckily she was too engrossed in whatever he was saying for either of them to notice that we were emerging from a vacant room that we had no reason to visit.

Mom laughed and cupped her hand around his elbow, both of them moving closer. I coughed, seeing that they were just seconds away from getting lost in each other's presence. They both look at us but didn't move away from each other. "You two are disgusting," I said, approaching them.

Mom rolled her eyes and focused back on Dad. "I believe that's our cue." She kissed his cheek and then ducked her head, walking down the hallway to the staircase.

"Come to my study for lunch, okay?" I asked Eikko. "I won't have long but we'll at least get to see each other then."

"Sounds like a plan."

Dad smiled knowingly and waved to Eikko. "Shall we head over to my study? We can work in there without really being disturbed."

"Yes, Sir." Dad gave him a sharp look. "Mr. Schreave."

I made my way down to the conference room and was pleased to find my folder on the table already at my seat, pleasantly light of the day's duties. Lady Brice was two to my right with General Leger beside her. "How did your wedding meeting go?" she asked me.

"Well, thank you. Can't wait to not have to plan it anymore, though."

General Leger smiled sympathetically. "Planning the wedding is what really prepares you for married life."

I laughed humorlessly. "Great."

The advisers were civil that day, keeping yelling to a minimum and for the most part listening to everything I was saying. I was really just looking forward to my meeting later that day for the constitution. A half hour into the meeting, in the middle of scribbling out a list of reminders for things I wanted to talk about at that meeting, a gunshot cracked outside the window. Guards flooded the room as General Leger grabbed me from my chair, practically carrying me to the corner of the room, his body shielding me. Advisers dove under the table, using their folders as shields. I noticed that Lady Brice had her own guard protecting her, also using his body as a shield with her against the bookshelf.

General Leger pressed a hand to his earpiece to hear better. "Oh for Christ's sake," he mumbled. "It's okay everyone. It's just the queen" All of the advisers looked at me as if they expected me to be holding an automatic weapon. "No, you fools, Queen America."

"What the hell…?" I mumbled, walking to the window that overlooked the gardens. There stood my mother, holding a large gun and having target practice amongst the blooming rose bushes. Without considering that the meeting was still going on, I left the conference room and went to my dad's study where some guards were still lingering inside, looking uneasy. "Mom has taken up shooting?" Poor Eikko looked utterly bewildered. This was quite the introduction into my family.

"I told her to find something relaxing to do," Dad said, making himself sound blameless in all of this. He said it as if her shooting clay pigeons was adorable.

"So she decides to pick up a gun? Yeah, that's so soothing. Especially to those of us in here who are on constant assassination-watch."

"I'll tell her to make sure Aspen knows that she's shooting so she doesn't terrify everyone in the palace," he said, trying to placate me.

"Fine." I went back to my meeting and commanded everyone to take their seats once again. We all jumped every time we heard the gun go off and General Leger looked increasingly uneasy as the meeting went on.

Finally I was able to go across the hall to my study where the gun couldn't be heard and thoughts of assassination attempts could be sent far away. Eikko came in for lunch, excitedly chatting about everything Dad had taught him. This morning they had only covered things as simple as provincial taxes and budgeting but he was more enthusiastic than I had ever really seen him.

Our constitution meeting was just with the advisers, Dad, Kaden and Eikko. With it being in such early stages of planning, it was best for us to minimize the people involved. Once we had a more concrete idea of what we wanted to include and the formatting we could bring in more opinions but if we had a hundred different people contributing from the beginning, it would be a disorganized disaster.

"Your Majesty, perhaps you could enlighten us as to what you're looking for with this constitution?" Sir Andrews inquired.

"Well, I would like to make everyone in Illéa equal," I told him seriously. There was a beat of silence before all of the advisers started laughing. When I say all of them, I mean all of them. Every single adviser was laughing in some way, shape or form. Dad frowned and motioned for me to regain control. "I'm sorry, gentlemen, but did I say something amusing?"

Mr. Rasmus was the first to collect himself enough to answer me. "Your Majesty, it's simply that everyone is already equal."

I pointed at him. "Let's talk about that." I stood and walked to the white board, retrieving a marker. I was grateful for asking Eloise to dress me in a dress with a blazer, making me look more authoritative than if I had just been wearing a frilly dress. "Tell me, men, how are our people equal? In what areas of society are they equal?"

"Education," Mr. Rasmus offered. "The abolishment of the castes means that everyone can now get education if they can afford it."

Some of the advisers mumbled in agreement. "Jobs as well."

I kept writing down their answers as they shouted them out. Education, jobs, housing, marriage, travel, medicine…they were all true. "All of these have been made equal and accessible among Illéan citizens due to the dissolution of the castes. However, there is one glaring area of society missing. Gender." There were some grumbles in response to that. "A man and a woman from different socioeconomic backgrounds can attend the same university but the woman will not be hired by the same employers following graduation. Why is that?"

Again, the advisers mumbled their answers but only Sir Andrews was brave enough to answer me directly. "Because women are more likely to stay at home to care for the children?"

"What? Because we just happen to have breasts that can then feed those children? Some women don't have the luxury of staying at home. Some women have to work because they need the money, whether due to the need for another income or because they lost their husband," I snapped. From the corner of my eye I saw Dad straighten his shoulders with pride for me. "Maybe, before you throw around such sexist statements as that, you can examine why men aren't more honorable and willing to sacrifice their careers for their children." I raised my eyebrows, challenging him to argue with me.

"Of course, Your Majesty. My apologies," he said quietly.

I flipped my hair over my shoulder and calmed myself. "Now, this glaring difference between the expectations of genders is due to the restrictions the law places on women. Since Gregory Illéa, there have been laws placed on women while men are excused from those rules without even a second thought. Consider the law that women who are pregnant without being married must be imprisoned. Why can't the men be imprisoned? Why shouldn't they be punished as well? It takes two to make a baby."

"That's just one rule though, Your Majesty," Mr. Rasmus said. "Is it really enough to justify reforming the government?"

"Is ensuring that women of Illéa aren't looked at as property reason enough to justify a reformation? Yes, I'd say that constitutes a societal revolution," I told him. "You all remember Lady Marlee Tames, correct?"

There was a long pause before some of the men nodded their heads slowly. "Eadlyn," Dad said in a warning tone. I wasn't sure how much the advisers knew about her time being hidden in the palace and Dad couldn't get in trouble for it now but he was clearly uncomfortable with discussing it openly. That's not where I was going though.

"Lady Marlee was punished because Carter 'stole' her. She was seen as property of the crown. That is unacceptable and it still is an issue. You all are guilty of seeing me as a commodity more than a person. So my first priority in this constitution is to make genders equal. Equal pay, equal rights, equal treatment, and equal opportunity. I want my people to all be equal in as many ways possible and to not be ruled by a bunch of small-minded supremacists."

Mr. Rasmus shrank down in his seat, clearly not used to being publicly humiliated by his sovereign. General Leger was the first to be brave enough to respond. "So if the ultimate goal of this constitution is equality, what are you planning on doing about the monarchy?"

"Shared, _equal_ power between the prime minister and monarch," I answered. "I'll have to do more research and speak with my executive advisers more but I don't want a single person to have the largest share of power. Obviously the monarch will have certain responsibilities that only they can attend to. Declarations of war, peace treaty negotiations…international policy will remain mostly in the hands of the monarch. National policy will be seen to by the prime minister."

Again, silence. I knew that the advisers were uneasy about this change in government – because they were scared it would mean the end of their jobs – but I had expected them to fight me more on this. So far they were simply rolling over and letting me call all the shots.

"I like it," Dad finally said, breaking the silence. "Sharing the power to help prevent having a tyrant in power while also splitting the workload. This is a good idea, Eadlyn."

Pride bloomed within me but I kept my face straight. I knew Dad could see that I appreciated the compliment. "Sir Hebb, I would like you and Lady Brice to work together with Kaden to start drafting a preamble. The United States Constitution has an excellent preamble and I would like to see us use that as an outline for ours. Kaden can help supply that research," I said, nodding to my little brother. He grinned but stayed poised even though I knew that on the inside he was doing cartwheels. "We will have another meeting in a few days once everyone has had a chance to think more about what they would like this document to look like. For now you all are dismissed."

The advisers slowly trickled out until it was just myself, Dad, Eikko, Kaden and Lady Brice in the room. General Leger would have typically stayed but he excused himself early, saying that there was something that needed to be sorted out with security. Dad approached me first, kissing my cheek.

"I'm proud of you, love. They're a formidable bunch if you don't know how to control them but you handled yourself very well today," he told me, pride pouring out of every word he spoke.

"Thanks Daddy," I said, embracing him.

Eikko smiled at me as well. "You were amazing. I was a little scared of you, honestly."

"Eikko, would you like to continue with your lessons? I can teach you what little I know about war strategizing," Dad offered.

"Yes, Mr. Schreave, that'd be great. And you know more than I do, that's for sure."

They exited with Kaden on their heels, listening with rapt attention to pick up on anything he could possibly learn from them. Lady Brice and I walked over to my office where Neena was inside organizing my mail for the day.

"These letters just came in for you, ma'am," she told me, setting them in a neat stack on my desk.

"Thank you Neena. Could you please call for some of that chocolate cake from last night? If there are any leftovers, that is. I could really use a pick-me-up." I sat behind my desk and thumbed through my mail, tearing the seal on a letter from Italy. Inside sat a personally written note from Queen Nicoletta, congratulating me on my engagement and then screaming at me about the constitutional monarchy. As a PS she said she'd be willing to help me if I needed it since Italy was run under a constitution.

"Lady Brice?"

"Yes, Your Majesty?"

"We need to schedule a summit for all of these leaders to come and discuss the constitution. Be sure to have Queen Nicoletta and my sister-in-law on the list. I'd like to have it at some point in July since we will have my bridal shower and father's birthday in August." I rubbed my temple, feeling a migraine coming on and knowing that my mood was on a dangerous precipice. One wrong word and I would snap.

She nodded and wrote it down on her clipboard. "I can arrange that. Once we have all of our contributors on board for this constitution we can decide on a week to host a summit with everyone." As she wrote she commented, "You didn't eat breakfast with your family this morning."

"No, Eikko and I slept in and ate in my room," I told her. "Yesterday was a long day for both of us."

"Unfortunately, some of the papers are telling a different story."

"They're already out there?" I asked, my head spinning at how fast the magazines and papers managed to circulate the details of my personal life.

She shrugged and began reading a newspaper on my desk. "'Her Majesty Queen Eadlyn played the part of a woman in love well but underneath the smile was an ambivalence expressed toward her wedding and the idea of marrying her new fiancé. Meanwhile, Sir Erik showed very little knowledge or familiarity with the current projects Queen Eadlyn is dedicating her reign to. They appear to be a couple in love but what we are seeing is a couple that was rushed into an engagement that neither of them seem to want to really take part in.' That's just the front page blurb."

I snapped. "This is exactly what I was scared of," I vented to Lady Brice as I paced around my desk. "Suddenly I'm engaged and am no longer able to discuss matters of diplomacy or how _my_ country is being run. Now I have to sit back and talk about weddings and love and flower arrangements while my fiancé – who isn't even officially the prince consort yet – answers all of those questions for me!"

She pursed her lips and clicked a pen against my desk. "It was one interview, ma'am. Naturally, with this being the latest news in your life and in the country, that is the nature of the questions that will be asked of you for the next few weeks. Stories always get skewed, no matter how hard we try to keep them straight."

"But one interview leads to a second interview and suddenly, the country has forgotten that despite having ovaries, I am a confident ruler!" General Leger walked in then, his frown unwavering despite walking in on my last proclamation. Dad and Eikko also came in, Dad raising his eyebrows at me. He was explaining something to Eikko that, from what I could pick up on, concerned military strategies. The general put an envelope down on my desk with a loud thump. "What now?" I asked, taking a moment to sound like a brat.

Other advisers and guards followed him in, all of them wearing various grim expressions. "Security received a package for you this morning, Your Majesty. Thought you might want to have a listen," General Leger explained. He passed what looked like a small tape to me. Another guard placed a tape player on my desk and slid the tape inside, pressing Play.

The advisers that had entered with General Leger were near the entrance to the study, discussing something seriously in hushed voices. I could barely make out my voice being played. "Can everyone please just shut up?" I shouted, wrapping my arms around myself as an icy block slowly settled in my stomach. Lady Brice chewed on her thumbnail nervously as we listened to the tape play.

"... _the only one who knows this Selection was planned as a distraction_ ," Dad's voice said on the tape player. " _Are you sure_?"

" _Yes_ ," my voice said. I cringed, hearing the lie in my voice as clearly now as I did when I actually said it. I could remember this conversation, occurring late the night before my engagement.

" _We cannot let this get out_ ," Lady Brice said firmly. " _If you let this get out, you'll lose any control you have left with the people_."

" _Sir, if you're still looking for a solution to the Marid issue, I could pay him a visit_ ," General Leger offered. My eyes met his over my desk, a thousand fears passing between us in that one moment. If I had just said yes, if I had just agreed to it. My people would still be on my side and I wouldn't have to be discussing wedding gowns and cake flavors with the press. I could just be queen and focus on more important issues that came along with being queen, like maintaining world peace.

" _No, that won't solve anything now_ ," Dad said. " _As long as he doesn't know about the Selection_." Dad cursed and paced away from me, stopping to put his hands on his hips and bow his head.

" _Well, Your Majesty, we must let you get your sleep. You have a big day tomorrow_ ," Lady Brice said, followed by the sound of the door opening and closing.

" _Eadlyn_?" Dad asked.

" _Yeah, Daddy_?"

There was a long pause and I remember the way he chewed over his words for a while before saying, " _I'm proud of you, you know? You didn't have to do this. We know that. And it was unfair of us to pressure you into it. I know it isn't turning out how you like but whatever you decide…your mother and I will be there to support you._ " He left then, leaving me alone with General Leger.

" _Yes, General_?" I asked.

" _Marry for love, Eadlyn_ ," he said simply.

I remember shaking my head. " _I know what I have to do. I have to do this for my family and for my kingdom. All great queens make sacrifices for their people. This will be mine_."

" _Your chance at love should be the last thing you sacrifice_ ," he urged. " _Please, Eadlyn, don't marry him_."

" _General Leger, I'm afraid you are overstepping your boundaries by advising me in this. Now please, allow me to turn in. I do have a long day tomorrow_."

"Someone turn that damn thing off!" I exclaimed, my hands starting to shake with anger. The guard seemed unable to turn it off faster, practically lunging at my desk to press the Stop button.

Lady Brice and Dad both looked furious as they studied me, waiting for my next move. General Leger's eyes swept the room like he was looking for a traitor among us. "Who was it from?" Lady Brice asked him.

"A Mr. Marid Illéa," General Leger spat out.

"How the hell did he get that?" Dad exploded, starting to pace.

The advisers were suddenly in an uproar, all of them yelling and accusing each other of being a traitor to the throne. My eyes met Eikko's and he grounded me, giving me a subtle nod to tell me that he was behind me in whatever decision I made. "The flowers," I growled. "Every conversation in this office that has taken place in the last six days was recorded and is now in possession of Marid. We need to make sure none of this ever gets out to the public."

Lady Brice nodded. "We need to start doing damage control right away. You may not want to kill him, Your Majesty, but he has now committed treason. We have no choice but to send guards to his house to apprehend him."

"That'd be great," a guard said flatly. "Except he's gone."

"What do you mean he's gone?" Dad demanded.

"We've already dispatched men to this apartment. He's gone. And no trace of more recordings."

Lady Brice huffed and slapped her hands on my desk. "We need to find him. He can easily blackmail the throne with anything he's heard. This one is bad enough and there have been dozens other things said in this office. We need to find him and dispose of him before he can do even more damage to this monarchy."

I shook my head slowly, sitting down in my chair. "We can't kill him," I realized.

"Of course we can kill him!" Neena said. "He's a traitor!"

"No, Marid is untouchable. This has been his plan all along. To get in here, get this intel, and then make himself a societal hero. Any move made against Marid at this point makes us look like the bad guys," I explained. "So we need to find a way for him to not hate us."

"Easier said than done," Neena mumbled.

"I'll kill him for you," General Leger offered quietly.

I clapped my hands to get his attention back on me. "Nobody in this room kills Marid Illéa, understand? Whether by their own two hands or by hiring someone to do it; no one kills him." I looked to Dad because he was really the only one who could help me with this. "We need to do it," I said to him.

He shook his head, running an aggravated hand through his hair. Of course he knew what we were talking about. "We can't, Eadlyn. It will only usher in more threats to our security."

"We have no choice," I told him. "He's already a threat enough. He could expose all of us. Just because you're not king anymore doesn't mean you won't ever have to answer for your actions again."

"I said no," he said darkly.

That was normally when I would stop arguing with him, but not that time. "I am sitting behind this desk now. I am paying for an argument you had, a fight you started. Now you need to fix it." Some of the advisers mumbled as they took in the sight of their queen commanding the former king to obey. When he still didn't answer me I turned to Lady Brice and ordered, "Call on Mr. and Mrs. August Illéa. It's time we had a reunion."


	5. Chapter 5

There was a rustling sound in the corner of my room, jolting me from my sleep. At first, I wondered how I could have been sleeping so lightly that such a small sound would awaken me but my hands then slid over the vacant spot in bed beside me. Eikko was gone. I rubbed my eyes and sat up, shoving my unruly hair back from my face. "Eikko?" I called into the darkness, waiting for my eyes to adjust.

I could hear more rustling from several feet away. Relying on memory and instinct, I slid out of bed and made my way over to the corner of the room in the blackness, my hands finally reaching the small table there. My eyes were finally adjusting enough for me to make out Eikko's silhouette. "Hey, what are you doing up?"

"I just have to finish this," he said urgently.

"Finish what?" He didn't answer so I reached over and turned on the light, throwing the room into an abrasive yellow glow. "Eikko, it's the middle of the night. It can wait until morning."

"No, it can't. I promised you that I would do it for you but it's not done yet and it needs to be done. I can't sleep until it's done."

I could see his hands were shaking as he took notes in the margins of the report he was reading. "Hey." My hands closed around his but he tore them away.

"I just have to finish this. If I don't, I'm a failure and you'll see no reason for me to be around. I already am a failure and you don't see it but you will and when you do, you'll realize that you made a mistake," he said, his words coming out in a jumbled mess. "I just…I feel like…I can't _breathe_."

It all clicked then. The shortness of breath, the way his hands trembled at the slightest deviation in plans, his aversion for the spotlight… "You have anxiety," I concluded in a whisper, unable to help saying it aloud. I didn't have much time to process this conclusion though because he was in the spiral of an anxiety attack. Mom never really had a recurring problem with anxiety but I had witnessed her having one or two over the years. She and Dad were always careful to keep them quiet, no doubt because she didn't want people fussing over her.

When she would dissolve into a puddle of tears and shallow breathing, I would just stand by and watch, at an utter loss as to how to help her. Dad would always make her sit and he would sit close without actually embracing her. One time he explained to me that she needed her space during her anxiety attacks but she still needed to hear his voice to talk her off the ledge.

I relied on those experiences then, in my bedroom in the middle of the night, as the same monster that was anxiety swallowed up my Eikko. I thrust my arms around his waist, pressing my face between his shoulder blades, shushing him gently. "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I'm here," I assured him. I hoped that this would work. Most of his worrying seemed to center around me so I figured that reassuring him that I was there to stay would help. "I love you so, so much. I could never regret you. Never. You're a wonderful fiancé and a great man. I'm here and I'm not sending you anywhere, anytime soon." I held him as his breathing eventually slowed enough for me to guide him over to the edge of the bed. Reluctantly, I slid away and went to the bathroom for just a few seconds to get him a glass of water. "Small sips," I instructed, passing it to him.

His hands were still shaking but his breathing was at least better. I waited for his hands to still enough for him to hold the glass steady on his own before going to my closet and retrieving the box of chocolate I kept hidden in there. It was the finest chocolates we could get imported and I couldn't find any better reason for them to be consumed.

It was another several minutes before he gathered himself enough to speak. "Put this at the top of things I was hoping you wouldn't see for a while," he said in a breathless voice.

I smiled sadly and rubbed his knee. "You've managed to bring the Queen of Illéa to her knees though. That's talent there."

"I'm sorry, Eadlyn."

"You have nothing to apologize for," I said tenderly. I rose to sit beside him, my arm wrapping around his waist. "How long have you had anxiety?"

"My whole life," he admitted slowly. "At first my parents tried to say that it was nothing; it was a phase I would get through. My sister was actually the one who stood up for me. We tried medication, then therapy, then medication and therapy. We even went to some herbalist but nothing worked. We've just kind of learned how to deal with it over the years."

I frowned, unable to imagine how terrible it must have been for him. "Why didn't you say anything to me? Did you really think I would kick you out?"

"It made sense to me. I didn't think that the palace would allow you to have a defective prince consort."

Though it was a terrible thing to laugh about, a small giggle peeled out of me. "Eikko, you have no idea…Okay, so let's start with my grandmother. She was sick apparently. Dad told me that she wasn't even supposed to be able to have kids; my dad was the only one she carried to term and they even expected him to have complications. They knew about her fertility problems before my grandfather chose her. Then there's my mom. God, she's had problems with anxiety over the years. According to Marlee, she and Dad met when Mom was in the middle of an anxiety attack. And let's not forget about the fatal, _hereditary_ heart conditions she introduced to the royal bloodline. Believe me, a little anxiety would never keep you from the throne."

"I just don't want you to see me as weak," he admitted in a voice so small and quiet, I almost didn't hear him speak.

"Anxiety doesn't make you weak, Eikko. Even though it's not something I deal with, I know how hard every day is for you. I know how exhausting it is and how hard you have to work to see the good in everything. Anxiety makes you stronger than you'll ever know." A thought occurred to me then. "Would you like to try medicine again?"

"I wouldn't be opposed. If it would help me sleep, I wouldn't turn it down."

I nodded. "Because I'm sure you can try talking to Dr. Ashlar. We can get you any kind of medicine here at the palace. If it's something you're open to."

"We could try," he said.

"We?"

He smiled bashfully. "You help me manage it."

My heart actually physically warmed at that. "Well, then let's see if I can help you sleep a bit. Your reports can wait until morning." He started to protest but I put a finger to his mouth. "Your queen is commanding you to try to sleep."

We climbed back under the covers together, his face pressing into my shoulder as he curled up against me. "Will you hold me?" he asked, his voice sounding so young and innocent that my heart broke a little for him.

"All night," I promised.

The next morning, Eikko was back to being his chipper self. He was furious with Marid but it was at least a fury that we could turn on and off. I was starting to consider making my bedroom a Marid-free zone because Lord knew he was not welcome in bed with Eikko and me. He left my room early to at least make it look like we hadn't spent the night together. I was positive that Dad knew but even if he did, I wasn't about to parade it in front of him.

Eloise was quiet as she helped me get dressed for the day. "When did I last wear this dress, Eloise?" I asked, running my hand over the shoulder of a navy blue dress. I had the perfect yellow blazer to go over it.

"What's the number, ma'am?" she asked me from where she was laying out her makeup brushes.

"7129," I answered.

She pulled a massive binder out from a drawer in my vanity and thumbed through it, searching for the number. "February 11, ma'am. You wore it for tea with Queen Nicoletta."

"Perfect. Pull my yellow blazer and maybe find a green accent necklace?"

"Lovely choice, Your Majesty," she complimented.

Eloise was just finishing my hair and finding the right heels for me to wear when I received a note from Her Majesty Queen America's official desk, asking for an audience with Her Supreme Majesty Queen Eadlyn in the Women's Room before I started my day. I huffed and walked to my office, relieved to find Lady Brice there, organizing my folders for the day. "Do I have time to go speak with my mother?" I asked her.

"She cleared your morning for tea," Lady Brice answered.

I felt my shoulders sag. If she had done something like this a few weeks ago, I would have stood her up, saying that I had too much to do. That was before she almost died though and I was only just starting to realize how desperately I didn't want her to die. I would spend the rest of my life and every resource given me by the palace to keep her from dying, simply to avoid seeing my father so distressed again and to also avoid the cataclysmic hole she would leave in our family.

Mom was waiting for me with a tray full of breakfast tarts and pastries, a pot of hot tea beside them. "Good morning," she greeted. "Sorry if I impeded on your schedule for today."

I waved it off and sank into the sofa across from her. "It's a welcome break. While I would rather use this time to get more sleep, spending it with you is okay too."

"I'm sorry I haven't gotten to spend much time with you these past few days since you got back from Kent. Osten has been sick and I've been covering for your father's last bits of work so he could care for him. Dr. Ashlar didn't want to risk me getting sick," she explained, seeing the questions in my eyes. It was unusual for my mom to not be taking care of one of us when we were sick.

"Mom, you're supposed to be relaxing, not working. General Leger was right; you really don't know what retirement is." I picked a cucumber sandwich off of the tray and shoved the whole thing in my mouth, suddenly ravenous.

"I'm getting there."

"I didn't become queen early for you to keep getting stressed."

She sat up straighter. "I'm not stressed. Do I look stressed?"

"A little."

"Well, I certainly look better than you. Honestly Eadlyn, have you been sleeping at all?" she reproached.

I shrugged. "Nighttime is the only time for Eikko and I to really talk. We have so much that we don't know about each other and I'm also trying to keep him up to date on everything going on so that he knows what he's doing when he officially steps into his role as prince consort."

"Aspen told me about your visit with his parents," Mom said quietly, almost reluctantly. "Want to talk about it?"

I moved to sit next to her, resting my head on her shoulder. "I just don't get what I did wrong. He said that they wanted to meet me. I understand that they were probably trying to look out for him but isn't there a certain line that you know you can't cross as a parent? Like a line that says that your child is in love and there's nothing you can do about it?"

"Some people are scared of that line, Eadlyn," she said. She pressed her lips to my hair and brushed it back from my face with her cool fingers. "Your grandfather went to extraordinary measures to ensure that Dad would never cross that line. How is Eikko doing?"

I beamed and sat up to see her face. "You called him Eikko."

"It is his name, Eadlyn."

"Yes, but it's Finnish."

"You're forgetting that I speak four languages in addition to English. I think I can handle one name in Finnish. We may need to discuss it though if you give any of your kids Finnish names." I cringed. Even though I was about to marry Eikko and he was the absolute love of my life and my soul mate, thinking about having kids with him at that point was slightly terrifying. "Am I putting the cart before the horse?"

"A bit. Wait, four languages? Spanish, French, Italian…what's the fourth?"

Mom laughed to herself. "Toddler." I laughed with her, shaking my head. "You laugh now but just wait. You'll be amazed how much you understand when you have a toddler screaming at you in the wee hours of the morning."

"I don't know how you were a mom while running the country. I can barely do it now."

"Believe me, it wasn't without some sleepless nights and some spats with your father. You got the best of us at times, my love."

I frowned. "Me? I don't know what you're talking about."

"It's true," she said, nodding. "You would scream and scream and scream if you weren't being held by one of us. And of course, your screaming would then wake up your brother. It's a miracle Dad and I wanted to have kids after you two."

"How did you and Dad manage it? You two are so close but I now know how little time you two had. I feel like Eikko and I barely see each other and we go to countless meetings together."

Mom paused, thinking it over. "Obviously you two have figured out that nighttime is when you're guaranteed the most time alone. But there are other things you can do to mix work with play. One of our best ways of spending time together as husband and wife while being productive was…" Her voice trailed off and she blushed.

"God, do I want to know?"

"We would take baths together while reading reports," she said quickly, trying to get it out. "I'm just saying, there are ways for you two to remain close and have time as husband and wife while not having to shirk your responsibilities as rulers. Of course, using dates as motivation to get your work done is never a bad idea either. For a few years we were able to have a date every Tuesday night."

"Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't be so lucky as to have found a guy like Eikko. Somehow, the two of us go together so perfectly…I just can't wrap my mind around it."

Mom gathered my hair in her hands and draped it down my back. "Love is a tricky little thing, isn't it? Just know that you are always welcome to come to your father and I if you need help. We can't fix all of your problems and you should learn how to work through things on your own but we're here."

"Thanks, Mom." I didn't want to think too much about the fact that we very nearly lost the ability to have her and Dad there for us forever. Even though Mom was the one who nearly died, Dad would have never been the same again if she had died. "Mom, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to but I have to know: what's Dr. Ashlar's official prognosis for you?"

She pressed her lips together, her hand flickering to her chest unconsciously. She was still recovering from open-heart surgery and though she put on a brave face, I knew that she had to have been having some bad days. And Mom was strong but she could only be strong for so long. I wanted to be the one she could turn to if she had to. "It's okay."

"Just okay?" I pressed, my stomach clenching.

"Obviously I'm more at risk for having another heart attack in the future. It's just a matter of being careful from now on, okay? They have me on strict medication and I have to go see Dr. Ashlar every week for a check up. Your father is making sure I'm exercising, resting, eating right, and all of that. Really, Dad's not going to let me try to check out on him again," she joked morbidly.

I wasn't laughing though. "And if you do have another heart attack?"

"Than they'll do another bypass," she said simply, shrugging. "I am well taken care of, Eadlyn. You do not have to worry about me. You have a whole country to worry about."

"Mom, if I don't worry about you, who will?"

She laughed out loud again. "Your father. Believe me, he worries about me enough for the whole family. I swear the man would never sleep if it weren't for Dr. Ashlar telling him that he needs to stay healthy for my sake. Even then, he sleeps just enough to ensure that he doesn't look like death."

"When you were in the hospital, you said that you've seen Dad get through far worse. What…what was that about?"

Mom pressed her lips together, her eyes growing sad. Clearly I had brought up something she didn't like talking about. I hoped I didn't just unknowingly put her back into memories of the massacre. "You know we almost lost your father during the massacre, right?" I nodded solemnly, holding my breath for whatever she was about to say. "I was with him…as he was dying. And Eady, I hope you never have to experience what I did in that moment. I hope that you never have to look into your love's eyes, knowing that they're dying…" She shook her head, unable to continue.

I put my arm around her, resting my head on her shoulder. "I'm sorry Mom. I can't imagine what it was like." I had had to face the prospect of not marrying Eikko, of having to live my life with someone else at my side and it was hard but it was somewhat acceptable. At least I would be able to know that he was out there, doing well for himself, and possibly happy. To have to live without him because he was no longer alive…I shivered at the thought.

"Enough of this sad talk though. I want to get the real scoop on what you were thinking for the wedding. And his parents. I only got bits from Aspen; I want the whole story." Just like that, Mom was back to being Lady America Singer, the firecracker Five that joined the Selection begrudgingly and stayed at the palace for the food.

I happily obliged her and we spent the remainder of the morning ironing out other things I wanted for the wedding. I was able to tell Mom all about Eikko's colorful home he grew up in and give her the full play-by-play of my encounter with his parents. I even confided with her about his anxiety because I was quickly realizing that I needed someone to talk to about it and she would understand. It was this amazing thing, the bond my mother and I had. And it had nothing to do with her almost dying or the fact that I was doing her job; we both were hopelessly in love with incredible men. We had found our soul mates in the most unlikely of places and those circumstances had somehow bonded us in a way that we had never bonded before.

I left the Women's Room with a smile on my face, musing over how lucky I was to have such an incredible woman as a role model in life. My smile faded though when I saw the crease between Lady Brice's brows as she read a tabloid. She wasn't the magazine type; she didn't exactly have the time for pleasure reading. This was not a good sign. From where I stopped dead in my tracks in the middle of the office, I could see a picture of me and Eikko at the concert in Kent with the angry yellow letters of the tabloid announcing, "Queen Eadlyn's Shocking Affair!"

"Please tell me that you're reading that article for giggles and not because it has something bad in it that we need to do damage control for," I groaned, sitting behind my desk.

"Did you know you're pregnant?"

I almost spit out the coffee I had just picked up. "I'm what?"

"That's why you chose Eikko. You two had a passionate affair on the side and you got pregnant. That's why you chose him."

"The Selection only started, what, five or six weeks ago? I would've had to have sex with him on his first day for me to know I am pregnant!"

Lady Brice sighed and put the tabloid down. "You can read all about your forbidden love story on page 27." She collapsed into the chair across from me, clearly exhausted. "At least this one is easy to disprove."

"I'll just drink lots of champagne and eat as much salmon as I can at my next public event," I told her.

"It's not just that though," she said, shaking her head. "Yes, we can shoot this rumor down easily but the message is pretty clear here. People are crazy enough to believe a story like this because they still have no idea why you chose him. We have no choice. You two must do an interview with Gavril tonight."

"But I took the morning off. I don't have the time to do an interview this afternoon."

"Doesn't matter," she snapped, jumping to her feet to head out in search of Gavril. "Your reign is at a standstill until you can get back into the good graces of your people."

I peeked at my schedule on my desk, trying to find anything I could bump to Sunday but came up short. A meeting with advisers was being pushed to the next day for the interview and the rest of my commitments were with foreign affairs and they absolutely could not be rescheduled. It was going to have to be a late night.

* * *

Eikko was visibly shaking that night as we got ready for the interview. "You have nothing to worry about. This isn't live; anything major can be cut later before it airs," I told him, smoothing his suit jacket. He really did look impeccable now that all of his suits were custom tailored for him.

"What if I do something really stupid though and forget your name? What if I forget my name?"

I smiled, trying not to laugh and seem insensitive to his worries but the idea did sound preposterous. "Should I tell them to get the teleprompter booted up?" I asked him, only half-kidding.

He straightened his sleeves one last time and stood up tall in front of me. "At least I know that no one will be looking at me. Not with you sitting next to me."

"Please, there will be tons of women gawking at you. Especially if you smile."

"I'll smile."

"You better. Even if it isn't genuine. You have to at least pretend that you kinda sorta like me."

He smirked. "I can manage that."

"Two minutes, Your Majesty," a producer called to me.

I dragged Eikko onto the stage and we sat down on the little loveseat that was only really used for joint interviews with Mom and Dad. They hadn't done one of those in a while though. If it was an interview about policy or diplomacy, they would field those questions from their podiums. This loveseat was reserved for things like announcing babies, checking in on married life, and other interviews that would fuel the gossip monster.

Eikko straightened his tie, tugging at it uncomfortably. I put my hand on his and waited for his eyes to meet mine to speak. "You'll be fine. If you start freaking out, just look at me. Do you want your ring back?" I asked him.

"Honestly, yes, but you need a ring on your finger. If the people are speculating about us being together you should have a ring."

I couldn't argue with his logic so I just nodded and squeezed his hand. We had been given special permission to be holding hands on camera as a sign of unity and intimacy between us. "How about this? If I want to answer a question, I'll squeeze your hand and vice versa," I proposed.

He nodded, looking relieved. "Okay."

Some maids did a last-minute makeup check on us as a cameraman started doing a countdown. Gavril winked at us before he went on. "Good evening ladies and gentlemen, Gavril Fadaye here and I am bringing you a very special treat for your evenings. I have with me Queen Eadlyn and Sir Eikko, her new fiancé." Eikko and I shared a warm smile. "Sir, I hope I said your name properly," Gavril joked.

"You did great, Gavril," Eikko forced out. His jaw was stiff but at least he didn't sound tense. "This one even struggled with my name at first." He nudged me lightly, making me laugh at the memory.

"I thought my name was complicated," I added.

"I can't argue with being the one to change my last name if it means getting an easier one. Plus, everyone in the world knows how to pronounce your last name."

"It does come with the territory."

Gavril cut in. "You two seem very close and familiar with each other. I think what a lot of us want to know is how this all started? Sir Eikko, you obviously spent a lot of time with the Selected, giving you access to Queen Eadlyn but how did you come to the realization that there was something more?"

I squeezed Eikko's hand. "I just want to be clear that though my choice may be shocking, I mean no will to any of the Selected. I understand that some of them may be upset with my choosing someone who was not officially a suitor but I do believe that the majority of them would agree that by the third week or so, Eikko was one of them. That being said, I had a soft spot in my heart for Sir Henri early on, allowing me to spend a large portion of time with Eikko since he was Henri's translator. I don't know about him, but I think it really started after the incident in the kitchens. Eikko was the one who rescued me and took care of me in the aftermath."

"What a gentleman!" Gavril exclaimed theatrically. Of course he already knew all of this. As the palace press secretary, he was privy to our love story. "Sir Eikko, did you know what you were starting in that moment?"

Eikko smiled kindly at Gavril. "Honestly Gavril? No. The fight all happened fast and I didn't have time to process it. I just knew that the last week or so had been hard on Eadlyn and to see her having another difficult night was terrible. It was all I could do to get her out of there as fast as I could."

"So then when did you two realize that it was real? That you were, in fact, in love?"

"For me, it was the week of my coronation actually," I answered. "I definitely knew that there was something different about him from the moment we met but it was during that week of chaos that it really hit me how much I love him. It couldn't have been a more overwhelming time. I was flipping between suitors because I knew that soon after my coronation I would need to make a choice in my future husband and we shared a sort of genuine moment just the two of us and it was then that I truly knew."

Eikko nodded, his blue eyes watching me. "Yeah, I knew a bit sooner than that but because I wasn't a suitor I didn't pursue her It was only in that moment that she just mentioned that I saw there was something mutual between us and that I could push her a little."

"Push the queen of Illéa?" Gavril teased.

"She needed it," Eikko said, holding his free hand up in defense.

I laughed. "I really did. There were so many changes happening in my life at the time and I suddenly had so much responsibility that it was nice for someone to take the reins and guide me."

"Would you say then that this was a bit of a forbidden romance?" Gavril asked conspiratorially, nearly salivating at the idea.

I laughed nervously and looked to Eikko, waiting for him to answer. "I respect Eadlyn and I respect the duties she must fulfill in life as the queen. I knew going into things that we would need something short of a miracle in order for us to get our happily ever after. I mean, she was prepared to end it in marrying a guy who was not her soul mate if it meant pleasing her people because she cares so much about her citizens and makes nearly every decision in her life based off them, and I knew that. The forbidden element actually made it even more heartbreaking, I think for both of us, because we both knew how it was most likely going to end."

"Now we saw you choose him, Queen Eadlyn. How did you propose, when the time came?"

"It was actually there on television last week," I said to him. "Neither of us was expecting to get engaged that night but I think it worked for the best."

"Absolutely," Eikko agreed. "We had talked extensively about it being essentially impossible for her to pick me because I wasn't a member of the Selected but she definitely had a change of heart that night and decided to cash in on love."

Gavril sighed and clapped his hands together lightly. "Obviously we need to discuss the hardware. What is that ring you're wearing, Your Majesty?"

"It's an heirloom of Eikko's family." I fanned out my fingers for the cameras to get a better look. "He actually gave it to me before for luck a couple weeks ago, before we were engaged or even thought we would really get to be married."

"We'll see how long it takes for her to decide she wants a diamond ring," Eikko teased and I playfully swatted him.

Gavril held my hand to inspect the ring closely and then squeezed my fingers before releasing it. "So, Sir Eikko, perhaps you could tell us a bit more about your background growing up? You're first generation Swendish, correct?"

"I am, yeah. My parents moved here shortly before I was born and we lived in a Swendish community in Kent while I grew up. My parents both have done a lot of good work for immigrants that have come over and need help adjusting to the new culture."

"Would you say you'd like to carry on some of that work as prince consort?"

He nodded and shrugged slightly. "If the opportunity presents itself, absolutely. With the world being largely at peace right now, I think now would be a great time to interpose some of my experience, growing up as a first generation Illéan, to help Eadlyn with some of her foreign policy. Even being able to expand job opportunities and government assistance to immigrants, refugees, and orphans would be enough for me to be satisfied. I'm happy assisting Eadlyn in whatever way possible though. Even if it means massaging her hands every night before bed." We had spent a solid hour practicing that one little speech in my bedroom after we had decided to do the interview. I had actually told Gavril to ask him that so that the people would be able to hear a bit about where Eikko was coming from as a future prince consort.

"I'm sure we can find something for you to do," I said cheekily, placing my free hand on his knee for a moment.

"Looking into the future, you come from a large family Queen Eadlyn with three siblings and then multiple aunts and uncles from your mother's side. Have you two discussed at all what the future holds for you two as parents?"

I blanched. Not because I didn't want to air how many kids I wanted on television but because we hadn't actually discussed it. Thankfully, Eikko squeezed my hand. "I think we're just going to take things one step at a time. We'll get used to marriage first and then really evaluate what we would like in a family. Right now, Eadlyn has her constitution and countless other projects that are her babies and I'm okay with supporting her with them for the time being." I nodded to show my agreement.

"Going into this big phase of life, you know, marriage is a big deal and big adjustment for anyone. How are you two preparing for it, knowing that it will be so much more public?"

"I think, again, we're just taking it one step at a time," I said.

Eikko jumped in. "Yeah. I have a lot to learn still and I'm looking forward to learning so that I can start helping her and acting as her partner in ruling. Her family has been helping me with the adjustment; obviously it's something that her mother has gone through and she was a confident ruler so if she can do it, I think I can."

I patted his knee again. "You'll be fine. You're doing great so far." He beamed at me, our eyes locked for a moment slightly longer than it needed to be.

Gavril smiled at us and then looked straight into one of the cameras. "There you have it folks, an exclusive interview with the happy couple. We look forward to seeing them continue to work together as Queen Eadlyn fulfills her reign. Thank you both for your time tonight; we know you're a very busy girl, Your Majesty." I waved him off as if it was nothing and I wasn't about to spend the remainder of my night reading reports on damage to infrastructure in Panama from a hurricane. "Congratulations, once again, and I wish you both all the best."

"Thank you," we both said graciously before the cameras cut out.

"How was that?" Eikko immediately asked, his voice anxious.

I put both of my hands on his face and pulled his face to mine, knowing that words could never express how proud I was of him in that moment. His eyes were still wide and bewildered when we separated. "You were amazing. You were everything a prince consort ought to be and I didn't even have to really tell you what to say or do. I don't even know what you were nervous about to begin with!"

He let out a long breath, clearly relieved to hear this. "I love you," he whispered to me reverently.

"I love you," I said. "I wish I could celebrate this with you but I have a mountain of work waiting in my office for me."

"You know, I meant what I said about wanting to support you in whatever way I could," he said slowly, contemplating something. "If that means sitting up until the wee hours of the morning with you, reading those reports with you…"

"Seriously?" I asked, raising my eyebrows. "You're not obligated to help me. Especially not now when you're not even officially my prince consort."

He shrugged and held both of my hands tightly in his. "I want to spend some time with my fiancée. Like it or not, my fiancée has some other people she needs to look after. I'll help you."

I smiled even wider and nodded. We both went to our rooms to change into more comfortable clothes, which essentially meant changing into our respective pajamas. We ordered a small feast of any junk food the kitchens could make for us: mac-n-cheese, grilled cheese, chicken fingers, popcorn, and small pizzas. We barely made a dent but it carried us through until two in the morning, when we were still sitting on the floor of my study with reports surrounding us, laughing and nowhere near finished but nowhere near tired. Looking across our pile of junk food, past where our bare feet were brushing together, at Eikko's smiling face as he read through a report in a hilarious impression of Gavril, I knew that I was seeing my future then. This man was indeed my soul mate, my best friend, and my absolute favorite person on the planet. With him by my side, everything seemed just a little less scary.


	6. Chapter 6

Eikko was sitting across from me on the floor, struggling to finish a bowl of creamy pasta, his long legs stretched out so that they almost reached me. "If we keep going like this, we're going to be obese by the time our wedding comes around," he jokes.

"It's only the second time we've done this," I said, not lifting my eyes from the report I was reading through. "And it's been a week since the last time. Not like we're doing this every night."

"I'm just looking out for you. I know you have a meeting with Hale tomorrow about your dress."

I sighed and feigned excitement. "Woo-hoo."

"C'mon, Eady, this is your wedding dress. Don't girls dream of their wedding dresses? I figured you would already have at least twenty sketches of your dress." I finally met his eyes. He was looking at me curiously, his eyes watching me carefully. "You okay? You've been out of it today."

I shrugged. "I wish we could elope," I admitted. Glancing at the clock told me that it was just past midnight, way too late for me to be up doing work for the third time that week. There was a certain point where I stopped being productive and we had definitely passed it. "I feel like no part of this wedding is mine. No part of my life is mine. It's all being dictated by camera angles and decorum."

He crawled across our papers and food to sit beside me, one of his arms wrapped around my shoulders. I took the hand dangling by my ear and kissed the back of it. "I wish there was a way I could fix that for you," he said sadly. "You have enough to worry about and be unhappy about. Your wedding shouldn't be one of those things."

"I just want to be married to you."

"Believe me, the feeling is mutual." He checked his watch and groaned. He gently pried the report from my hands. "Let's go to bed. You'll feel better in the morning."

"Okay."

We crawled into bed together, the warm pre-summer nights making my room hot and causing us to sleep in as little as possible. I couldn't deny that it was getting harder and harder to wait until marriage to make love to him. It seemed like the one missing piece in our relationship. Over the last couple weeks we had gotten to know each other backwards and forwards; there was really only one boundary between us. It was almost getting to be frustrating.

As it turned out, I didn't feel any better the next morning. My dark mood followed me throughout the day, right into my appointment with Hale. I had been anticipating seeing Hale for the last week since scheduling his visit but not even seeing his smiling face and a sketchbook full of wedding dress designs in his arms wasn't enough to lift my mood.

"How's Ean?" I asked him, looking for any kind of distraction from my melancholia. Mom had been watching me closely, picking up on my mood, but she averted her eyes as I walked with Hale down to the Women's Room.

"He's good. It's been hard trying to balance the long-distance aspect of everything while also trying to be discreet. Living on opposite sides of the country isn't exactly conducive to being a couple."

I hummed, pursing my lips. "Is there any way I can help you?"

"You're helping enough as it is. I'm giving him the money you're paying me for the dress design so he'll be able to move to Belcourt. We won't be living together. Like I said, we're trying to stay discreet."

Mom held the door open for us to the Women's Room, Raelynn, Gavril, Neena and Allmond were already inside. "Please, if there's anything else I can do, don't hesitate to tell me."

"I will."

We sat around one of the tables in the Women's Room and Hale opened his sketch book. He was unsurprisingly nervous as he started walking me through several different design concepts. "Your coloring is good for blush dresses. If you wanted one, you could go with one of these softer, more feminine dresses. The color makes them fun so the design itself is more sophisticated."

I was about to say that the idea of a blush dress was really appealing but Raelynn interrupted me. "As queen, you must wear white or cream, Your Majesty."

Hale looked disheartened but quickly smoothed his face out again. "Okay then. These are some of the pure white dress concepts I have." He pushed the sketchbook over to me and I leaned in to take a look.

"Are those _sequins_?" Allmond asked him with disgust.

"Well, it would be some sort of sparkle…"

"Absolutely not," Raelynn said. "Any sparkle would not be acceptable for a queen on her wedding day. It makes her look too promiscuous."

I couldn't believe it. What had started as frustration was now blossoming into full-blown fury. "Mom?" If anyone would understand this, she would. She had to plan a wedding with these people, surely she felt this frustration.

"Unfortunately, Eadlyn, Raelynn makes a fair point. Besides, sparkly dresses don't work well on camera." She gave me an apologetic smile but I ignored it.

 _Camera angles and decorum_ , I repeated in my head bitterly. Thus started the heated debate of whether I would look better in true white or ivory – apparently blush was completely off the table. Allmond fought Hale tooth and nail that I would look better in white and that it would be more appropriate but Hale thought that white would make me look too dark with my olivey skin and dark hair. Mom pressed her hand to her temple and shook her head, clearly not about to weigh in on the argument. Sequins or no sequins, true white or ivory, this wedding dress was no longer my wedding dress. Which was the final straw for me.

"Well, if you all have this handled, I'll be leaving to actually be productive," I snapped, capping my pen and rising from the table.

Everyone else hurried to stand except for Mom who looked shocked but not a bit disappointed with my attitude. "Eadlyn, don't do this," she implored in a warning tone.

"No, I am leaving. Clearly you all don't need me to plan my wedding so I'm going to leave and be queen for a while. Forget being a bride. Apparently being a bride is something limited to non-royalty."

No one protested as I stormed out of the Women's Room, much to my disgust. Maybe they were too shocked or didn't think it would be proper to argue with their queen. For once – _for once_ – I actually wanted these people to argue with me and tell me that I was wrong, that I was actually necessary to planning my wedding, but no argument was forthcoming.

I had made it halfway down the hallway before Hale started running after me. He caught up to me at the steps. "Eadlyn, I'm sorry," he hurried to say, probably scared that I was going to keep walking and ignore him.

I wanted to keep walking and ignore him but this wasn't his fault. I wanted to look at all of Hale's designs and discuss them at length with him, weighing pros and cons of dozens of different dress options. But Allmond and Raelynn had pretty effectively stopped that from happening. "You have nothing to apologize for, Hale. I'm just being a brat."

"No, you're not. You're being Eadlyn." He said it like it was adorable. There was nothing cute about my meltdown though; I was even disgusted with my attitude. "Look, I get it. I can't empathize you, no, but I can sympathize. You're Queen Eadlyn all day every day. I get it that you just want to be Eadlyn Schreave de Koshinen for a day."

"You have no idea how desperately I want that right now," I told him, momentarily melting at the sound of my last name linked with Eikko's. Decorum dictated that he would assume my last name but in private, for all of our own official documentation, we would have both last names. "For what it's worth, I loved all of your blush designs."

"You didn't even see half of them." He sighed, somehow looking both defeated and inspired. "I was thinking though, that I could make some of them in ivory. Want to see?" I nodded fervently, walking to a nearby bench with him. He placed his sketchbook in both of our laps and flipped to a design that was earmarked. "This is my personal favorite. It's very classic, with a bustle here and the layered skirt but it's still elegant and makes a statement, which is perfect for you."

"I really like this, Hale," I told him, brushing my fingers over the design. "It's not very modest though."

He laughed. "Neither are you."

"Point taken. Good luck convincing Raelynn and Allmond that this dress is acceptable."

"I won't need to." He shook his head. "You're the queen. These people cannot control you, Eadlyn. The only people who really care that you have too much cleavage are advisers and they're a bunch of pompous rats anyway. Nobody is going to talk about how scandalous it was for you to have bare shoulders on your wedding day. They'll be too excited about you getting married."

I smiled, reaching across his book to squeeze his hand. "Thank you Hale."

"I don't know if anyone's ever told you this, Eadlyn, but you're the most powerful woman in the world, one of the most powerful people in the world. Don't let a few obscenely self-important individuals try to take that from you." He leaned back and put a hand behind his head. "Besides, you're giving me my happily ever after. It's the least I can do."

I wanted to be flattered but all I could do was think about Marlee's words in the Women's Room a couple weeks before, when she admitted to feeling so indebted to my mother. I could see the similarities in my relationship with Hale and I never, _ever_ wanted to have him feel so indebted to me. "Hale, I'll pay you for this one gig but after that, you and Ean will have to find someone else."

"What?" he asked, dumbfounded.

"If I keep paying you and you keep using that money to help your relationship with Ean, I will forever be tied to you two. You'll never stop owing me. Maybe you won't think of it at first but eventually you'll realize that you're spending every day thinking of ways to thank me for all I've done."

He shook his head in disbelief, looking slightly offended. My heart cracked slightly at the hurt in his eyes. "I would never rely on you, Eadlyn."

"I know you wouldn't." I took his hand in mine and tried to get us back on track, back on good terms. "After you design my wedding dress, you'll be a sensation. The wealthy will flock to you, Hale. Enjoy your fame. I'll call on you when I need you but trust me, with all of the attention, you won't even miss me."

"I think I'll miss you a little." His lips pulled up one side to reveal the tiniest, most bashful smile. I could see then that he understood what I was saying and wasn't the least bit upset about it.

I smiled back at him and patted the hand I was holding. "Me too." I paused, blushing as I asked, "How about my baby's christening outfit?"

His smile became absolutely radiant at that. "I've never designed baby clothes before, but I'd be honored to for you, Your Majesty." He winked.

The door to the Women's Room opened and Mom emerged, her head swiveling to the left and right as she searched the hallway for Hale and me. She spotted us and came over. "Allmond, Raelynn and Gavril all took the east exit from the Women's Room. I figured that would be wise in light of…well, anyway, I thought it best that we take a break from this madness and reconvene later. Perhaps when you're less stressed?" She put a comforting hand on my shoulder and my frustration with her for not standing up for me properly promptly evaporated.

"Thanks, Mom."

"I'm sorry Hale, but we do have another important meeting this afternoon that we need to prepare for."

Hale nodded and rose to his feet. "Of course, I understand. I'll keep working on that design and get your measurements from Eloise. Hopefully I can have some fabrics for you to choose from during our next meeting."

"That would be great." We started walking down the hall and stopped at the staircase. He would be going downstairs to leave but I had to go back up to the fourth floor to continue my day. "I wish I could walk you out but…"

He interrupted by hugging me tight. "I'm so proud of you Eadlyn. You're doing an amazing job so far," he whispered to me.

"I'll try to keep that up. I need all of the allies I can get right now."

When he pulled away he was smiling sadly. "Everything works out for the best, remember? You'll be fine." He waved timidly and then proceeded down the steps, a guard escorting him on his way out.

Mom was quiet as we proceeded upstairs but I could tell that she was nervous. It wasn't often that I saw my mother nervous. She had every reason to be nervous though, especially about our afternoon. I just hoped that Dad would be in my office when we arrived so that he could calm her down a bit. "You and Dad should have a date night soon," I told her.

She laughed, her nerves causing it to still come out stiff. "Oh, really?"

"I just feel like, despite you two technically being retired, you still don't get enough time to yourselves. You're always looking after Osten or teaching Kaden or helping me plan my wedding. I'm glad that you're relaxing and that you aren't as stressed but you two still aren't getting enough time together as husband and wife."

Mom rolled her eyes and smiled. "Aside from the fact that we share a bedroom? I see your point though. I'll just tug my ear later then."

"What?" I asked, confused about what that had to do with them going on a date.

"Inside joke. What's Eikko up to? He's not coming to this meeting, is he?"

I shook my head. "He's reading a report for me on the clean up efforts in Panama and drafting ideas for initiatives from the crown. He came to me with this great idea about starting an organization run by the government that is specifically for giving aid to people in the wake of disaster here in Illéa. The United States had it and it seems like it worked pretty well for them. At least from what he told me."

Mom nodded thoughtfully. "It's a good idea, honey. But where will the money come from?" It felt comforting to bounce ideas off of my mom. This was how I grew up. Mom and Dad kept me in the loop on things and allowed me to offer my ideas, poking holes in them until I had a solid plan of attack.

"That's the complicated part. I think in order to make it happen, we'll need to make some sacrifices elsewhere. I'm sure there's a way to lump together money set aside for improvements on infrastructure and medical aid and channel it into this organization. Eikko's much better with numbers than I am though. He can probably find a way to finance it in a quarter of the time it would take me." She pulled me in from the side, smooshing a kiss onto my cheek. "Mom!"

"What? I'm just proud of you," she said. "You're really good at this whole queen thing, you know?"

I blushed. "I learned from the best."

"Damn right," she laughed.

We entered my study where Dad was already waiting for us, pacing in front of my desk with a deep crease between my brows. So much for my hopes that he would help calm her down; he was clearly as much of a wreck as her. "Honestly, you two, get it together," I said, clapping my hands. "Are you really the same people that negotiated the first legitimate peace treaty between New Asia and Illéa in the last hundred years?"

"With Georgia and August's help," Dad muttered bitterly. He strode to the liquor cabinet tucked into one of the many bookshelves lining the walls and poured himself a drink. "Brandy, Eadlyn? Ames?" Mom and I both said no. Mom was still under orders from Dr. Ashlar to moderate alcohol intake but I just didn't have a taste for brandy or whiskey.

"Let us all just remember that it isn't August and Georgia that are spreading the rumors about Eadlyn. It's Marid, and even though he's their son, they're not to blame for any of this," Mom said to both of us.

Dad tried to keep his face even but I could see that he resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "They could be telling him to do this. It may not be the exact same, but he is leading his own revolution in a way. This could something that they've been planning for years."

"Well we still don't know that, Maxon," Mom snapped. "The benefit of the doubt may not be a bad idea in this particular scenario, especially because they have so kindly accepted our offer to come here and meet with us."

"Yes, because they want to end the monarchy!" Dad exclaimed.

I shook my head. "If Marid wanted to end the monarchy, he would've poisoned me with those flowers. He wants something else. He couldn't be jealous, could he? I mean, he couldn't actually want to marry me, right?"

Mom coughed, making Dad's face soften slightly with worry for her until it became clear that she was coughing more out of being disgusted than discomfort. "You two are distant cousins. You're not getting married no matter how much he wants to marry you. And I doubt that's the case anyway."

"Then what could he want?"

"Maybe this is Marid's way of trying to take over," Dad said. "Everything he's doing, he's trying to discredit you. By discrediting you, it places doubt in the people's minds about your ability to rule. Get enough doubt and they'll be begging for a new leader. Marid will be the voice of reason to them, they will have to vote for him."

My eyes widened. "You don't mean…the election for a prime minister?"

"It could be." Dad shrugged and took a pensive sip of brandy. "In a way, your idea of a constitutional monarchy put him closer to the throne than he is simply by being an Illéa. He's not a politician, he is a popular spokesperson and people will rally behind the popular guy, especially if he's an underdog opposing the government like Marid. Not to mention, he's Marid Illéa. The people will naturally believe in him."

"That's never going to happen," I insisted through gritted teeth.

Mom placed her hands on her hips. "We need a plan of attack for this meeting. August is rather cunning; he's going to come into this with a silver tongue."

"You're right. And Georgia will support him, no matter what." Dad turned to me. "Do we have any reports from General Leger on Marid's possible location?"

"Sadly, no. The guy disappeared, he's a ghost." We were getting increasingly uneasy about his absence. He had ten days worth of confidential conversations held between monarchs of a country that was in a precarious state of peace to use as blackmail, so why wasn't he using it?

The three of us walked down to one of the libraries on the first floor, this one mainly being for old literature from Europe. The books down there were books that we never touched simply because they could cure an insomniac of their sleepless nights. The room was hardly ever touched, making it perfect for a formal meeting with people we really had no interest in seeing.

They arrived promptly at three o'clock. Mom and Dad held hands until the very last possible moment but even as they let go when the doors swung open, their knees were still touching. Suddenly I was wishing that, even though it wasn't his battle, Eikko was sitting to me so that our knees could be touching and I could at least have some support and comfort.

It had been a solid decade or so since I had last seen August and Georgia Illéa. They both looked older than what I knew they really were. Somehow, despite being a year younger than Dad, they looked older than him. And they weren't even king and queen. I knew that they were rebels and thus spent time homeless. Perhaps looking well beyond their years was a consequence of that stress from earlier in their lives.

Their faces were straight as they took their seats across from us. August reclined into the sofa, stretching his legs and arms out like he owned the place. In a way though, he kind of did own the palace.

"Thank you so much for accepting our invitation here," Mom began, always the perfect hostess. Her hands were folded primly in her lap.

August and Georgia exchanged a hard look, and then August said, "Maybe we can skip over the pleasantries and get down to business. My wife and I are under no pretense that this is a social call, even though you've picked a library for us to be entertained in. I know that this room is hardly ever used, thus making it a less intimate setting than you'd like. I also know that this room is most conveniently located for the main safe room under the palace should anything happen while we're here. So again, maybe we can just get to the part where you accuse us of making your lives miserable once again?"

Resisting the urge to actually growl at his blatant disrespect, I tried to wrack my brain to remember if this was always how August spoke to my father. It did seem like it. Maybe at first Dad took it all in good fun or recognized the fact that he needed August. Then he realized that he didn't really need him after all and that August's boldness was downright treasonous.

"I wouldn't say that," Dad said quickly, trying to keep this meeting from going completely off the rails. Mom was bristling though. "We just have some inquiries about your son."

"I'm surprised you didn't just send Aspen to see us. Of course, he's probably already been to Marid's apartment and found it empty, right?" August asked. I could see that this was very quickly turning into a battle of the fathers and who would protect their kid more. Dad would protect me by keeping the peace; August would protect Marid by disrupting it.

Dad shook his head. "We didn't see the need to send officers to your home, August. You aren't here because we're accusing you of anything, actually—"

"There's a shock," August muttered sarcastically, rolling his eyes. Maybe it's because I had grown up since I had last seen him but he seemed to be acting more like a child than ever.

"—we really just want to know if you have any idea where Marid is."

"Why?" Georgia asked, speaking up for the first time.

"Why?" Mom repeated. "Because as of now, he's a criminal and an evader of the law. I think right now we're trying to offer you the opportunity to hand him over peacefully before we need to get more aggressive."

Georgia raised her eyebrows, taken aback. "Because we must be the ones harboring him? Because we're the big, scary rebels?"

"Not at all. It's because you must have some idea of where he is. You are his parents."

"Exactly," August said. "Marid is smart enough to know that when he ran, we would be the first people you all look to for answers. He isn't with us and he won't come to us anytime soon."

"You do realize that what Marid has done – blackmailing the Crown – is treason and is punishable by death once he's found?" Mom asked them, being direct as ever.

Georgia barely blinked. "Just like negotiating an illegal arms deal between an unallied nation and a group of rebels?"

"Georgia," August said, his tone measured as a warning.

"We've all done things against the Crown that are punishable by death. What's so different about this time?" Mom and Dad were both quiet, not answering her. "I think this is a lot more personal than you'll care to admit. What I'm seeing is you two holding our actions against our son."

I couldn't be quiet any longer. "Of course it's personal! The only reason Marid was able to get those recordings from my _personal_ office is because he is considered as a friend of the family."

"Sounds to me like you should have chosen better friends," August snapped at me.

"You two have always had rather open hearts. You've paid for it multiple times over. Now you've raised your daughter to be the same way."

Mom laughed darkly. "Don't start criticizing the way we raised our children. If anything, you two are the ones that were wrong in how you raised your son. We raised Eadlyn to reflect what we personally believe in."

"As did we! We raised Marid to be vigilant and strong and to not trust anything too fully. It's not our fault that he's using those skills now against you. Maybe you shouldn't have presented him with the opportunity to be so critical of you all."

"So you raised him to be a rebel?" Dad asked, one of his eyebrows raised. "That's reassuring."

"Like August said, we raised Marid how we thought would be best," Georgia said.

Mom shook her head, her jaw tight as she said, "You know what I love? You two were so adamant about liberating people from the castes and allowing people to choose the job they love to do. You may thin that you raised Marid to be free, but you actually raised him in a caste of your own making."

Georgia shot to her feet, causing her chair to topple backward with a loud thud. Her fingers twitched slightly and I held my breath as I waited for her to draw a gun on my mother or threaten her in some other way. Instead she looked levelly between my parents and said in a perfectly placid voice, "I think we're done here."

Mom also rose to her feet, rising to be several inches taller than Georgia. "Yes, I think we are," she answered in an equally calm tone.

They both left without even a nod or any sort of acknowledgement in our direction. As soon as the doors shut behind them, Dad stood and started pacing the length of the room ferociously, muttering to himself. I couldn't quite catch any of it, he was talking so fast and so quietly. Mom stayed still where she had been sitting, seeming to be doing a breathing exercise. Finally Dad snapped and sent a marble bust flying several feet before it landed with a heavy thud on the floors, probably leaving a dent where it fell.

"They're impossible! Why did I ever think it was a good idea, befriending a couple rebels? They may not want to overthrow us but they certainly don't like us!" Dad exclaimed.

"Maxon, dearest," Mom said in a quiet voice, trying to reason with him. "You were desperate when they came to us and they did help."

"But now Eadlyn is paying for those actions!"

She shook her head in my direction. "Eadlyn wouldn't even be here if it weren't for the Northern rebels. They saved your life, remember? If they hadn't been in the palace that day, you would have surely died. All of us…" Her voice trailed off when she saw that Dad's face was only getting stormier. In truth, I had never seen her discuss the massacre with him before. It must have been something they only did behind closed doors.

"None of that matters now. What matters is that Marid isn't with them and they don't know anything," I said, hopelessly. I had felt so sure that I would get something from August and Georgia. Now I felt as lost as ever.

"They do, actually," Dad said, standing in front of me.

I frowned. "I didn't hear them say anything about knowing his location."

"But they know do know something. Because they didn't say anything. If they were in the dark, they would have bluffed by saying that they have information. As it is, they know what he has and they know that there's no need to blackmail us if he can do it just as easily," Mom said, nodding her head in agreement.

"They would have felt safe bluffing if they didn't know anything. The fact that they didn't even allude to it means that they have information they don't want us knowing they have." He winked at Mom, a proud smile on his lips. "Good job figuring that out, Ames."

"My heart may be a little faulty but my brain still works just fine. Except for around you." She winked at him mischievously.

I rolled my eyes. "Ick," I coughed dramatically. "You two are obviously about to get gross so I'll go brief General Leger on our meeting and we'll start brainstorming ideas for how to move forward from this." The two of them were already staring at each other wantonly, barely registering that I was leaving.

It was only as I traipsed back up to my office that my anger started to mount until I was actually shaking. General Leger beat me to my office after he had listened in on the whole meeting from a security room. We all knew that he would have much rather been in the room with us for protection but he was most needed in the security hub, in full command of everything happening in the palace. That way he could monitor not just our meeting but anything else that August and Georgia could have had planned behind the scenes.

"It's complicated," he said to me.

I frowned in confusion. "What do you mean? What's complicated?"

"Working with your friends. Not everyone can do it. Your parents and I have had our fair share of disagreements over the years as well as Marlee and Carter but I suppose that our friendships were all formed before we worked together. Your parents built their friendship with August and Georgia around the fact that they were all working together. Probably why they couldn't reconcile any professional differences they had with each other," he explained.

My eyes lifted from the various notes left for me on my desk and met his honest green eyes. I hadn't really seen it before, not before I was working with General Leger everyday. Before, I wasn't spending the better part of my day actively strategizing with him and asking for his input like he was one of my leading advisers (because despite his seat at our meetings, he wasn't). General Leger was incredibly intelligent though. His brain analyzed and drew conclusions at lightning speed. He was constantly watching and understanding. It was the first time I truly understood how the caste system was so unfair. I couldn't fathom how anyone with a brain like his could live a life cleaning houses and doing dirty work for someone wealthier and probably dumber than him.

"Your Majesty?" he asked loudly, jarring me from my thoughts. I jumped, realizing that he had been trying to get my attention for several moments. "Look, you've had a long afternoon. I'd like for you to take tonight off and get some rest so that you can get in here bright and early tomorrow morning."

"Are you sure?" I asked, my hands gripping the arms of my chair. At his suggestion of a free night my heart practically jumped out of my chest but my conscience was set on reminding me of how much work I had to do.

"Go," he said, winking at me. "I'll do an official report for you on August and Georgia and work on some of your other security stuff for you."

My shoulders wilted. "But what about Miss Lucy?"

He smiled sadly, seeming to understand my concern. "She's having a much needed girls' night with some of our friends. Trust me, she will not miss me tonight. Besides, if you're here making sure we have time to spend with our wives, you may never get to see your fiancé."

"Okay then," I said, blushing. He took a folder off of my desk and sat on one of the couches, beginning to flip through it as he got comfortable by sliding off his shoes. I wrote down a few last-minute notes for my work in the morning and then dashed off to my room. On my way through my door, I said to the guard posted there, "Could you please send for Sir Eikko for me?" The guard bowed and disappeared down the hallway. I quickly changed out of my dress and heels in favor of something a bit more comfortable, leaving my previous outfit lying on a chair in my closet for Eloise to launder later.

The door hadn't even shut behind Eikko when I crashed into his arms. He quietly shut the door behind us and steered me further into my room, my arms not once slacking in their vice-like hold on his shoulders.

"What's going on, Ead?" he asked softly, running his hands through my hair. His thumb brushed over my eyebrow. "What happened today?"

"I can't do this, Eikko," I said. Hot, angry tears started to leak from my eyes. "I mean, what am I doing? I can't be the queen. I'm not twenty years old. I'm not even of age yet! Maybe Marid is right, maybe I'm just ruining this country and I have no business leading anything."

"Stop, stop," he said. He brushed some of the tears away as he shushed me. "Eadlyn, _stop_. You need to just take a deep breath, okay?" I swallowed thickly and drew in a big lungful of air, realizing that I hadn't done so in quite a long time.

"I cannot do this Eikko," I whispered again.

Eikko just shook his head. "You're so wrong, Eadlyn. You are an amazing queen. Already, you are making history."

"But what if I'm making history by being terrible?"

He sighs, not impatiently but almost sounding like found my meltdown adorable. "So what? You will never be able to please everyone. Look, not anyone can do this job. You may think that you were simply born into this job, but you were born into it for a reason. Not everyone will understand what you do or why you do it but you do what you think is best, and you do what only you think is best for your people. You cannot let some rebellious ass dictate what you do; you'll exhaust yourself."

I leaned my head against his chest, just breathing in the scent of him. He smelled like sun and grassy fields and fresh silk and something else I couldn't quite place. We stood in the middle of my room, listening to my shaky breaths slowly ease into long, fulfilling draws of air. "Can we do something tonight? I mean, can we do something that will take my mind off of things?" I asked, looking into his eyes pleadingly.

"What would you like to do?"

"You decide. I can't bear to decide something for myself right now."

He nodded decisively. "Okay. Very well."

Eikko took me by the hand and guided me out of my room. As we drifted through the quiet halls of the palace, I had no idea where he was taking me. I didn't ask though. There was a peaceful sort of liberation in having someone call of my shots for once instead of looking to me for guidance.

We ended up in the stables where our horses were promptly saddled. I watched him mount his horse with ease, seeming very confident on the back of a large animal. "Have you ridden before?" I asked him curiously.

"Once or twice," he said in a way that told me it had been more than once or twice. "I grew up farming, remember?"

I marveled at how he led his horse into a gallop effortlessly with me close behind him, for once chasing after him to keep up. I hadn't raced someone since I was little and Dad took me riding but back then he took me riding to teach me about hunting, not for the recreational aspect of it.

We raced each other through the woods on the palace grounds, winding between large trunks and jumping over fallen trees. The wind lifted my hair from my shoulders and tossed it behind me, making me feel free and slightly wild. My senses were overwhelmed by the orange hue of the woods at sunset and the smell of fresh cut grass. My heart pounded in time with the thuds of horse's hoofs on the solid earth beneath us.

Finally Eikko stopped at the edge of the gardens. We stayed mounted on our horses but were as close as possible, with the toes of my boot just barely grazing his on one side. From where we were lurking in the shadows, we could see the sun set beneath the palace walls. Mom and Dad were walking through the gardens where they finally settled on the same bench they always went to. For what felt like the millionth time in the several weeks, I let out a sigh of relief that Dad wouldn't have to be visiting that bench alone from now on.

"When we're their age, do you think we'll be like them?" Eikko asked me, both of us watching them as they talked animatedly about something.

I felt for a moment that we were intruding on some intimate moment between the two of them and that we should leave and give them some space. They were mesmerizing though and I realized that I had a hard time looking away, even to meet Eikko's eyes. "No, we won't be like them. We'll be us," I told him simply.

"Perhe?"

"Exactly."

"Eadlyn?" I hummed at the sound of my name on his lips. "Are you happy that you chose me?"

I finally tore my gaze away from my parents and studied Eikko. He didn't seem scared that I would say no or worried that I was taking a long time to answer. In truth, there was no proper way for me to capture just how happy I was with my choice in him. Some deep part of my heart always knew that I would be incandescently happy with him, it was just conquering my fear of choosing love over approval that had paralyzed me for so long. I had to answer him somehow though.

"Eikko Koshinen, I am ecstatic that I chose you."


	7. Chapter 7

Life settled into a strange sort of peace then. It was eerie, really, like the calm before a storm. Marid was still silent, much to General Leger's frustration. Our damage control meetings for Marid trickled off from being every few days to once a week and then once every two weeks. General Leger wasn't halting whatsoever in his search for Marid but without any word from him, there was no way for us to track him. It left us with two hypotheses about him: he was either dead or planning something big.

"There's no reason for him to hold on to anything to release because at this point, it would be out of date," General Leger theorized. "We're still going through footage from when those flowers were in your office but we can't find anything that damning."

"So maybe he is dead," I said hopefully.

He shook his head. "We'd know if he was dead."

"How?"

"His parents would have burned down the palace by now."

It wasn't exactly reassuring, knowing that his parents could easily make the palace burn. It made me feel even more uneasy than knowing that Marid was still hiding out there, waiting to strike at the best time. His absence was very noticeable though, and it preoccupied my mind far more than I would have liked when I could have been celebrating happy things like the upcoming gathering of mayors and other political leaders to discuss the first official draft of the constitution as well as Dad's birthday.

At least, I was looking forward to Dad's birthday until one morning when I walked into my office and found his birthday ball scratched from my calendar. "Neena!" I called, chewing my lip as I waited for her to come.

"Yes, ma'am?"

"Why is my father's birthday party no longer on my schedule?" The whole reason for planning the summit in August was so that Queen Nicoletta and our other foreign friends could stay a few extra days to celebrate his birthday. The man was turning forty, after all. A new decade called for a party.

Neena looked confused as she peered down at my calendar. "I'm sorry ma'am, but I didn't cancel it and Lady Brice hasn't come in yet. Perhaps you could ask your father?"

"Ask my father?"

"It is his birthday, ma'am. If anyone knew why it was cancelled, he would know why."

"Absolutely," I agreed. I strode down the hall to where I could hear piano music trickling from Mom's bedroom. Praying that I would find both of them inside and fully clothed (because since they retired, you'd think it would pain them to be apart), I poked my head in. Thankfully all clothes were being worn and both of my parents were inside. "Dad?"

His head shot up from where he was lying on Mom's bed, watching her play. "Eadlyn, how can we help you?"

"Your birthday party was scratched from my schedule and Neena didn't know why. Do you know who could have cancelled it?"

"Of course." He was quiet for several moments. I almost thought that he wasn't going to answer when he said, "I cancelled it."

I raised my eyebrows at him. Mom continued to play a familiar sonata. " _You_ cancelled it?"

"I did. Eadlyn, there's really no need for a big ball this year. I'm not king anymore, the people don't have to celebrate me and I'd really like to not have to go to another stupid ball. Now that I'm not king, I would like to spend my birthday how I've wanted to spend my birthday for the last twenty years," he explained, not at all fazed by my shock that he had cancelled his own birthday party.

"Which is how, exactly?"

He smiled wickedly as Mom stopped playing. "Do you really want to know?" she asked, propping an elbow up on the ledge for sheet music in front of her. I couldn't remember the last time I had seen her play with music though; she played everything by memory because apparently she wasn't already a superhuman enough.

"Never mind. But what about all of the people we've invited for your party?" I turned to Dad again.

"Just explain to them that I no longer see it fit to have such an extravagant celebration and that I would like to scale back this year. They'll understand. Besides, the Italians always bring a party no matter what. We won't be missing much from them."

"What about Ahren? He promised to come around for your birthday."

Dad rolled his eyes. "For Illéa's sake, Eadlyn, I'm not giving up on my birthday altogether. We can celebrate as a family along with our friends. Just no party. That way the hundreds of thousands dollars you would typically spend on it can be put elsewhere, for a greater purpose. I've already personally reimbursed the people you've paid. "

I huffed. "Well, what are we supposed to do? Eat chocolate cake and pretend that August 23 isn't basically a national holiday?"

"You can, but your mother and I will be in Dominica." They shared a conspiratorial smile but Mom faced me again, her smile sliding off her face slowly. She could see how bothered I was with the fact that Dad was determined to not celebrate his birthday. I wasn't about to apologize for the fact that I wanted to just have one day to praise my dad properly for all of his hard work. I was only his daughter though; my want to please didn't come close to Mom's and they deserved this vacation together.

"When are you leaving?"

"The day before my birthday," Dad answered simply, lifting the newspaper sitting in front of him to inspect the headlines.

I let out a big breath, relieved that they would be there for the summit. I had nothing left to say to either of them so I chose that moment to leave and head back to my office. The summit was in ten days but I had something else much more pressing to attend to at the moment. Panama had been suffering from even more terrible weather, causing the need for aid and improvement to infrastructure to increase further. I wanted to visit to be able to get a better idea of what they needed but with the summit, Dad's now-cancelled birthday and my wedding just a few weeks later – eek – it wasn't the right time for a diplomatic visit.

With few other options for learning how to improve the Panama citizens' well-being, I called on Kile.

"When you said I was banished, I didn't think I was really allowed to come back before your wedding," he commented as he strolled into my study casually, sporting a healthy tan and a wide smile.

"I was the one who banished you. I think I'm allowed to change the conditions as I see fit," I answered playfully.

He smiled again and I walked around my desk to embrace him tightly. "God, Eadlyn, how are you? It's so bizarre to not talk to you. There have been dozens of times where I've wanted to call you to ask for your opinion or input on something but per the rules of my banishment, I called my assigned adviser instead."

"Good boy," I joked. We separated and sat on our respective sides of my desk. "So I have a project for you."

"If you have a project for me now, what exactly have I been doing for the last two months in Bonita?"

I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes at him. "Your service in Bonita has been priceless to the Crown. I would like to reward you in due time but I do have one big favor."

"I'm listening."

"How would you like to go to Panama?" I asked him.

He frowned. "How would I like to die of air pollution?"

I grimaced, knowing that the pollution was a big problem in Panama and Honduragua. "It's only for a couple months."

"A couple _months_?" His mouth dropped open.

"Look, obviously you've heard about all of the bad weather and storm damage they have down there. I want an official palace architect down there to be a leader for people trying to rebuild. Again, we'll get you anything you need when you ask. I'll be able to visit after my wedding to better assess the damage but I really need someone there now representing me."

"So you pick me, the favorite of the Elite?" he asked, his voice only half-teasing.

I shrugged. "I guess so." He sighed and studied the carved edging of my desk in front of him. "Kile, I know that it couldn't have been easy for you to come back here and I know that helping me could just be rubbing salt in your wounds but I didn't know who else to ask."

He shook his head slowly, his eyes finally meeting mine. "It's not my feelings for you, Eadlyn. I'm not over you but I am moving on. I'm not sure working for you will be best for that."

"Are you saying no?" I drew back, shocked, trying to think of new ways off the top of my head to do this if he wasn't going to be the one helping me.

"I'm saying that I would do it, I would just need to have as little contact with you as possible."

I pulled out the folder of reports and transcripts of my phone calls with the mayor of Panama. We had spoken at length about the initiative I wanted to start for national aid, starting in her province. She loved the idea and gladly accepted my offer for help. The only issue was the advisers – but who was shocked by that? Any problem with the implementation of new policies or initiatives could be traced back to them. "This is a packet of information that could be valuable to you. Just look it over and tell me what you think about it."

"I'm not sure going through a 200-page packet written by you will really help my case."

I hesitated and then said, "I wasn't the one who organized it." Anyone could have written it, any of the fifty advisers working the palace. But my dropped gaze gave it away.

"Oh," he said, his voice somewhat high. "Okay. Well, I'll take a look. Am I allowed to leave now?" he asked, almost as an afterthought.

"Of course," I answered. We both were pretending to not hear the hurt in his voice. It only made my own heart hurt. We had managed to part on such amicable terms and he seemed to accept my choice in Eikko. Maybe the distance from me hadn't helped though. Maybe his being far from me and having a fresh perspective made him realize that he actually was heartbroken or angry about my betrayal. As I watched him leave my office, I wondered whether or not I was right in bringing him back. Was he really my only option or was he the only option I gave myself?

Just as Kile reached to open the door, it swung open and Eikko stepped in. I held my breath as they appraised each other for several moments. "Kile, it's good to see you," Eikko greeted stiffly, obviously sensing the tension. Typical Eikko, though, plastered on his sunny smile and clapped Kile's shoulder. "Really, are you staying? I still want a rematch in chess."

For a horrifying second, I thought that Kile would turn him down. After all, Eikko had already beaten him in Kile's biggest competition in life so far. "You better prepare yourself for a lifetime of rematches then, because you are never beating me," Kile swore, shaking Eikko's hand. I let out a long sigh of relief.

"Deal." Kile disappeared through the door and Eikko met me in the middle of the office, kissing me tenderly. "How is he?"

"He's wary of agreeing to it," I told him. "He's still hurting. He's trying to hide it but I can see right through him. I just hate that I did this to him."

Eikko smiled sadly and folded me in his arms. "You made an impossible choice but spared yourselves a lifetime of pain and discontent," he reminded me. "Someday he'll meet a lovely woman and fall in love with her properly and he'll understand the choice you made."

"Am I a horrible person for wishing that day comes soon?"

He laughed lightly. "No. You just want what's best for someone you love."

"How are you feeling?" I asked, wanting to get the conversation away from Kile. Eikko had woken up that morning feeling extremely anxious after having a night filled with terrifying dreams. He didn't remember any of them specifically but they left him on edge. I suggested that he stay and sleep a bit longer but he assured me that a morning spent riding through the grounds and being active would suit him better. I hadn't seen him since then though and had been more than a little worried about him.

"Better. Not one-hundred percent but definitely better than I was this morning." I could see that he was being honest. His eyes were a little less lost and his smile didn't seem so forced.

I ran my hands up and down his arms, the urge to undress him right in the middle of my office just to feel his warm skin on mine almost unbearable. Nothing like budget meetings to get me in the mood. "I managed to convince Brice to take some of my work off of my hands tonight so that we can have a date night," I informed him. "I don't want any more bad thoughts haunting you when we go to bed tonight."

"No offense, but I'm not sure you can really help that."

"Did you take any of your medicine?" Dr. Ashlar had prescribed Eikko with some anxiety medication but it was only to be taken in instances that he felt he had no control over his worry and it was hindering his ability to function.

"No. I don't like it. It makes me feel all fuzzy and out of it. I'll just stick with my beautiful fiancée as my medication."

The grandfather clock in the corner of my office bonged and I pouted. "Well, your beautiful fiancée needs to get moving or she'll be late to a very important budget meeting. Are you sure you're okay to go to this meeting for planning the summit events?"

"I'm fine. Gavril and Raelynn completely understand." My wedding dress debacle with Raelynn was all but forgotten, especially with three – now two, thanks to my father – large-scale palace events looming on the horizon. It was best for me to not be at odds with my event planner.

"Thank you so much for planning this for me. You have no idea how big of a help it is."

He bowed dramatically. "I am happy to serve my queen." He checked his watch. "Now get out, before the advisers accuse you of being a petulant teenager who can't show up to her own meetings."

"Ouch," I gasped, not taking a single word to heart. I knew he was joking. Sometimes he liked to kid about our age difference and the fact that he was an adult while I was still considered a teenager by Illéan law. A teenager with an army and nuclear weapons at her disposal, but still a teenager. We were still sharing a teasing smile when we parted ways in the hallway, going in opposite directions to our respective meetings.

Lady Brice took her seat on my right, her customary place at our table for meetings that Eikko didn't attend. "I have a challenge for you today," she said, arranging her pens in front of her meticulously.

"Oh boy," I said nervously.

"I want you to get through this meeting without strong-arming at any of the advisers." I paused, trying to keep my jaw from dropping. "Just hear me out, okay? I get it, you're trying to assert your authority but you've done it. They listen to you. They don't necessarily respect you though. Just look at them."

I did. I watched them all enter the room in staggered groups, each of them bowing to me as they entered but not really meeting my eyes. A thick tension hung over the room and the advisers did look nervous. They seemed so beaten and worn-down. Had I done this to them? I'd had my fair share of arguments with them during meetings and had come out on top with nearly all of them. Brice could just happen to be right on this. "But what do I do? I don't want them to tell me no."

"Just listen to them. You may be the reigning monarch and sovereign of this country right now, but these men are here to advise you. You have to let them do their jobs. Without them, you're on your own and you'll be surprised how quickly the country will crash and burn if you are on your own ruling. That's how dictatorships happen. The only way to do it all on your own is to be a controller. You don't want to be a controller."

The last adviser arrived then, meaning that I had to start the meeting. It went about as well as you could expect. The first half of the meeting just consisted of general updates on the budgets for multiple projects and events happening simultaneously and approvals to continue financing them. That alone took two hours. I barely spoke in that time aside from approving and asking for specific details on projects. Finally we got to the second half of the meeting where we discussed upcoming projects, my aid initiative primarily.

"Your Majesty, I must advise you that while we can fund this initiative for the next few months, something permanent will be slightly trickier," Mr. Rasmus said, reading over a spreadsheet.

I opened my mouth to tell him that no, this was going to be a staple in the country from now on, but I held my tongue. I was acutely aware of Brice giving me the side-eye, waiting to see how I would respond. This was going to be the moment where I show her how much I value her opinion. "What can go in order for us to make it permanent?" I asked him.

"There are a number of options. There's still a good amount left in the Selection funds since yours did not last very long. There are also some other initiatives we can put on hold for the time being."

"Which ones?" I was struggling to keep my tone neutral.

"Queen America's prodigious academies. The scholarships have been sending that budget through the roof lately—"

"So we decrease the amount of scholarships or take something else out of their budget. We don't need to strip them of all scholarships!" I exclaimed, leaning forward in my seat slightly.

Mr. Rasmus blinked at me and then slowly said, "That's just one of the things we would need to look at decreasing funds for if you want to go forward with this initiative."

I turned to focus on another financial adviser and asked, "Do we have any other options?"

"You could move Sir Kile's work from Bonita to Panama," he reported.

I shook my head. "No. He's in the middle of dozens of building projects. He can't just abandon them for the sake of Panama. As tempting as that is, it would be unfair to him," I added. _I've been unfair to him enough already_.

The adviser sighed. "These our are options, Your Majesty. Your parents' initiatives or Sir Kile."

God, I could have thrown my notepad across the room at that. I was so, _so_ tired of having Kile being a choice in my royal affairs and having to deny him. I couldn't very well take away Kile's ability to fulfill his dreams after I booted him out of the palace with the single command of fulfilling those dreams. There had to be some other pile of money sitting around the palace, unused, waiting for a greater purpose. For a greater purpose. Dad. _We can celebrate as a family along with our friends. Just no party. That way the hundreds of thousands dollars you would typically spend on it can be put elsewhere, for a greater purpose._ Of course Mom had told him about the initiative. And who would know how much money I would need to make it happen better than my father, the very man who had spent the majority of his life pulling money out of thin air to make Mom's initiatives happen?

"What about the money being reserved for King Maxon's birthday party? The party has been cancelled so we have that whole budget. Not to mention the money we didn't use on his and Queen America's anniversary festivities. And isn't there anything left from my coronation budget? There's no reason to hold onto that. My coronation is over."

Mr. Rasmus frowned, clearly not pleased that I had managed to open up a third door. "I'm not sure we can use that money for something like diplomatic aid, Your Majesty."

"Why the hell not?" I demanded. "There's no stamp on that money saying that it can only be used for parties. It's not going to be used, so let's put it toward something good."

"What kind of message would it send for the king to leave Angeles during his birthday and not properly celebrate?"

I immediately gave up on Brice's challenge for me to be a calm and respectful queen because I really had tried and it clearly wasn't getting me anywhere. "What kind of message does it send for this nation's previous king to be celebrating and drinking hundred-dollar champagne while its citizens are starving and living in temporary shelters, trying to put their lives back together? What kind of message does that send?" With a deep breath to collect myself, I closed my folder and put the cap on my pen again. "Open up a base account using that extra money we discussed and contact the marketing team to start developing the design plans for this initiative. I want doctors and contractors in Panama by next week. That will conclude this meeting."

"But, Your Majesty, we have more matters to discuss—"

"Mr. Rasmus, take a two-percent cut from all other budgets for the next month and put it toward the initiative. I veto any other initiatives starting. This emergency aid program is our top priority right not and I will not have it any other way."

The advisers rushed to stand and bow as I exited the room, Lady Brice right on my heels. I didn't acknowledge her until we were safely behind the closed doors of my office. My skin crawled at the thought though. My office didn't really feel safe anymore. Not since finding out that Marid had been spying on us. What was I going to do though? Renovate the most used, most important room in the palace to erase the memory of him being there?

"That wasn't exactly what I meant when I told you to tone it down," Brice said, her voice hard. She had the ability to sound impossibly passive while she was angry, a chilling trait she shared with my father.

"What was I supposed to do?" I asked her, not in the mood to be reprimanded by her. "Sit back and let them terminate my proposed initiative before it's even born? Or kill my mother's hard-earned programs? That's her legacy. I would never compromise on her efforts just to move forward in building my own legacy."

"But you did it again! They're just trying to help you, Eadlyn. I get it, you want to help your people but you can't limit who the crown helps to just one province. Sometimes you have to step back and see the bigger picture of the world and your own affairs."

"I do see the bigger picture. I see that I need to help my people and that if I don't do something to improve their lives, there will be no reason for them to obey my commands and listen to me. Our economy will suffer without those jobs and without their hard work. So sorry if I'm trying to fix things in a way that you don't agree with but for now, _I_ am the only ruler in this country and I am going to do what I think is best."

Exhaustion seeped deep into my bones, overwhelming me quickly. I didn't have the energy to argue with anyone anymore. I didn't have the energy to be queen. I just needed someone to either listen to me or tell me what to do. There was only one person in the palace that would give me that though.

For once, I had to wait for him. He was in a meeting that afternoon with Gavril, discussing upcoming public events and more importantly, Gavril's replacement. I would have loved to be part of the decision in who was going to replace him but the reality was that I didn't have the time for it. Eikko happily took it off my plate.

I twirled my heel around with my toes lazily, sitting on the edge of my bed. He finally walked through, smiling with his suit coat thrown over his shoulder. My breath hitched when I saw him. "Hello, my love," he greeted, setting his coat on the chest at the end of my bed. "Man, I've only known Gavril for a few months but I'm already mourning him. He made all of the scheduling today so simple and painless. And he knows you so well he obviously…what's wrong?" he finally asked, noticing that my smile wasn't exactly a smile.

I opened my mouth to explain but I didn't have the words. There were no words for what I was feeling. How I felt like a prisoner in my own home due to Marid's intrusion and threats and how I felt like a child at work, despite being one of the most powerful people in the world. But I couldn't explain any of that to him. "Do you ever feel like you have absolutely no choice in what you do, ever? To the point where you start to kind of believe that you're incapable of making your own decisions?" I asked him, feeling tears sting my eyes.

"What can I do?" he asked, sitting beside me and taking my hands in his.

I leaned over to kiss him hungrily, our lips connecting for several minutes. I eventually pulled away just enough to say, "I need to do something on my own. I need to have one thing that's mine and mine alone."

"Okay."

"Anything?"

"Anything," he vowed.

I nodded and a nervous laugh bubbled out of me. "Make love to me, Eikko," I whispered.

My heart was pounding so loudly in my ears that I nearly didn't hear him respond. "Okay," he breathed out. His nose brushed mine and I laughed again, this time with more anticipation than nerves. "Okay," he repeated, laughing with me. And he did just as I asked. He let me lead and be in control, obeying my every command, even the ones that made me blush so much that I couldn't even voice out loud. Our souls settled on the same plane that night, connecting us in a whole new way. We were one person, one heart, one mind. I realized that I never really knew what it was like to be so cherished by another human before Eikko treated me with the utmost respect and gentility in that one night. I really felt it that night. Part of me rose up and came alive while the quieter, more timid side of me died. And I knew then that this was it, this was forever. This was _perhe_.

* * *

I practically skipped to my office the next morning. Eikko and I barely were able to part ways in the morning. Breakfast was not as awkward as it could have been since Mom and Dad were both absent, meaning that there was no one there to draw any conclusions from our secretive smiles back and forth. Kaden watched us closely but he kept his mouth shut, because he's clearly the most intelligent in the family.

Eikko and I ducked into a safe room and kissed passionately for several minutes before we decided that we had to be responsible and attend to our jobs. It only took a few moments of separation for me to start planning the next time I could see him. I was viciously hungry for his presence and his touch. I was about to crawl out of my own skin, I was so uncomfortable.

The office was quiet as I read through the list of items we wanted to officially include in the constitution and give it a final approval before the summit. I had read probably fifty different versions of this list but it had to be just right. Different items had to be general enough to blanket several different areas of society while others had to be impossibly detailed and specific to avoid confusion. As annoying as it was to pour over these lists, though, I knew that it would make the summit move much more easily if we already had items on the table for what we were including.

It was eleven o'clock when I started to get nervous about the lack of advisers. Not even Lady Brice or General Leger. The guards were all still there, posted outside my door but they looked worried.

"Being queen wouldn't be enough to convince you two to break your vow of silence for confidentiality with General Leger, would it?" I asked them, crossing my arms. Even though I was nervous, part of me was still floating on Cloud Nine and dreaming about the feel of Eikko's hands on…I coughed and tried to ignore the blush I knew was spreading across my chest and on my cheeks.

"No, Your Majesty," one of the guards answered.

"Right. And I don't suppose you two could give me any inclination as to what has the advisers all hiding today?"

They exchanged a confused look and then the same guard asked, "You don't know, ma'am?"

"Know what?"

"We thought someone would have told you by now. Your brothers were told during their lessons after breakfast," the other guard said.

"Well, everyone is a bit preoccupied right now. The king did say for everyone to go," the older-looking guard told him.

I had to cut in. "The king? What did my father have to say? Why did he send everyone home?"

"For privacy, ma'am." I frowned, still confused. "It's your mother. She's in the hospital."


	8. Chapter 8

Every single different scenario flashed through my mind as I sprinted down to the hospital wing. Mom was dead or in emergency surgery again. She had a stroke or something else wrong with her. My mom could have been dying and all I could think was _Please, God, not before my wedding._ It seemed selfish and wrong but if she died, I would not be able to go through with this wedding. Not without her there to walk me down the aisle with Dad. I should have asked the guard what was happening but I took off before I even thought about it.

Unlike last time, the hallway outside the hospital wing was deserted. No sign of Dad or General Leger or Miss Marlee. I didn't know if that was a good sign or not.

My hand had just closed around the handle of the door to enter when Eikko came streaking around the corner. My bones melted at the sight of him. I was seconds from falling on the floor as he reached me and enveloped me in the sanctuary of his arms. Was it possible that I had been so ecstatic not even a half hour ago? Everything finally seemed like it was coming together. I should have known that it was all too good to be true.

"What's going on?" Eikko asked into my hair. "Is she okay? I came down before anyone could explain anything to me."

"I don't know," I whispered to him. "I don't know what's going on."

He waited for me to be the one to pull away, knowing not to push me into going inside before I was ready. I would have stayed out in that hallway for years, procrastinating, but that wasn't what queens did. Queens took charge of the situation and went headfirst into battle, chin lifted and crown held high.

My parents were inside the same room Mom was in last time. I didn't know just how tense I was until my eyes landed on Mom, sitting in bed, still wearing her silky nightgown and robe, wide awake and looking slightly annoyed. "Wait, what is this?" I asked, my eyes darting between her, my dad and Dr. Cleary.

" _This_ is your father overreacting to just a little bit of heartburn," Mom grumbled, rolling her eyes.

"How was I supposed to know that it's heartburn?" Dad complained.

Dr. Cleary coughed, trying to get the conversation back on track. "I was just explaining to your parents that what Queen America experienced this morning was some mild heartburn. Nothing to worry about, really. I'd like to keep you here for some tests and try to diagnose the cause of it to make sure that it's not gastroesophageal reflux disease. I am almost positive it's not, as we would have found it in our other tests we've been doing in the last couple months."

"So she's okay?" I ask Dr. Cleary. I was still holding my breath. Eikko's fingers brushed my lower back, making me shiver slightly. A sick part of me was thankful for the fact that this happened so that they would be focused on each other and not Eikko and me. Mom was way too smart and too observant to not see that there was a difference between Eikko and me this morning.

Dr. Cleary gave me a tense but hopeful smile. "Yes, I think so."

We all exhaled. Dad still seemed to be slightly unconvinced though. He rubbed Mom's knee. "I know this may be a bit much, but I just want to be sure you're okay. Especially if we're going abroad in a few weeks."

"Um, going abroad? A few weeks?" Dr. Cleary squeaked out, her eyes wide.

"Is that a problem?" Mom asked.

"Your Majesty, I cannot advise that you are safe to travel. With your health still not being perfectly cleared yet, I don't feel comfortable with you traveling abroad."

Dad and Mom were quiet as they took that in. Clearly the former king and queen were thinking that they no longer needed permission to travel anywhere. "But you said that I'm healthy," Mom protested.

"You are healthy for having just had a heart attack and undergone bypass surgery, America. But you're not in the safe zone yet. I understand your desire for peace and quiet but until I'm sure that your heart can handle the stress of everyday life, I'm afraid you're confined to the palace and Angeles."

"How long will that be?" she asked, starting to sound angry.

"You need to make it six months after your heart surgery with no scares for me to feel comfortable clearing you. If you do have a scare, that six months will start again."

"Six months?" Dad repeated.

Mom's lip trembled as she tried to control her emotions. Eikko shifted his feet and I knew that we should have left but I was still trying to process everything. I felt sad for my parents as well. No one deserved a vacation more than they did. "Max, your birthday…I'm so sorry," she apologized quietly to Dad.

He stood to sit by her side in the bed, facing her, and squeezed her hand. "Hey, it's fine. We can go somewhere next year for my birthday. I'm okay with having a quiet birthday here at home. As long as I'm with you, I'll be happy," he assured her.

I really did feel like I was intruding at that point so I turned and left with Eikko right behind me, both of us trying to be discreet. Once out in the hallway, he studied me closely. "You okay?"

I nodded. "What are you doing today?"

"Last-minute preparations with Raelynn, concerning room assignments for next week," he informed me.

"You don't think you could do that in my study, could you?" He agreed but a befuddled frown lingered on his beautiful face. "I just need you close." That seemed to explain it to him. He didn't need to think twice to understand. He just knew that I was scared because of the false alarm with my mom and I needed him with me.

Brice was in my study when we arrived, reading an update from one of our diplomats. Her greeting was forced and her smile was tentative at best. Not that I was surprised what with our argument the day before. I didn't have the energy to harbor any aggravation toward her though so I embraced her before proceeding to my desk. "I appreciate everything you do for us, you know that, right?" I asked her as I squeezed her shoulders.

"I do. Sometimes I worry that I overstep though. Like I cross the line from being an adviser to being an aunt."

"You are my aunt, you can cross that line. How many times have you seen my father cross the line between leader and father with me? You both want what's best for me and have more experience than me. I need all the help I can get." She smiled at that, this time more confidently. "Speaking of, will I have to be on the lookout for any tension between nations next week?"

Brice picked up the report and placed it in the folder on my desk for papers I didn't have to read but could choose to if I had the time. "The Italians are not getting along with North Africa right now," she reported.

"Is anyone ever getting along with North Africa?" Eikko asked, looking over the notes he had for Raelynn as he waited for her to arrive.

"Things were better after the war with New Asia ended and North Africa got new leaders. They've had some rebel activity though and those rebels are trying to overthrow their leaders while also threatening the EU."

I rolled my eyes. "Great."

"We have more pressing matters right now, Eadlyn. Illéa doesn't have any reason to get involved in a war with North Africa, especially while we're still recuperating from the war with New Asia. I suggest we stay on course and focus on this summit next week."

"What first?" I asked her, expecting her to lay down a list of people I should meet with privately for various matters of state.

Imagine my surprise when she asked me, "Have you thought about your music selections for the welcome dinner?"

* * *

Ahren was the first to arrive for the summit, a full day early. Camille would be coming later but she couldn't spare the time away from France with her already staying the extra few days afterward for Dad's birthday. Ahren arrived completely without my knowing in the early hours of the morning. He arrived so early, in fact, that I didn't have any warning whatsoever for him barging into my bedroom. More importantly, Eikko didn't have any warning to run and hide.

"Wake up, Your Majesty! The French are invading and are taking you hostage for a day of riding and movie-watching and…holy crap, there's a guy in your bed," Ahren stammered, pointing at Eikko.

My poor fiancé looked utterly terrified at being caught in my bed with no visible clothing on. What was worse was that I was very clearly naked as well under my blankets. "Ahren, out!" I demanded, pointing to my door.

He didn't need to be told twice. He simply retreated with a knowing smirk. I knew he would be waiting in the hallway for me all morning if I didn't go talk to him then. I ruffled Eikko's hair and slowly climbed over him to get out of bed. My nightgown was lying on the floor on his side of the bed after being deposited there hastily the night before. I grabbed my fluffy robe as a last-minute cover-up to allow myself just a bit more modesty before slipping into the hallway where sure enough, my twin was waiting for me.

He seemed to be cool as a cucumber, sitting on a plush bench and inspecting his fingernails. His somewhat prone position gave me the ultimate opportunity for attack so I swooped in, pushing him off the bench and onto the floor. "Hey!" he protested, jumping right back up to his feet. "What is he doing in your bed?" he demanded in the next breath.

"He just so happens to be my fiancé. I can do what I want with him," I said angrily.

"Jesus, Eadlyn, you couldn't have let me meet the guy before I knew you were sleeping together? Now how am I supposed to intimidate him?"

"What does our physical relationship have to do with whether or not you can intimidating Eikko?"

"He officially has a better relationship with you. He's locked into this." He narrows his eyes thoughtfully, an idea clearly popping into his head. "I could tell Mom and Dad and use it as blackmail."

I jabbed my finger into his sternum and stared down his big brown eyes. "Not. A. Word. Got it?"

"Mom and Dad don't know about that?" he asked, raising his eyebrows dubiously.

"Yeah, but Mom and Dad don't know about _that._ "

"What? What's _that_?"

"Ahren, don't make me say it…"

"Oh, _that_?" He made a crude hand gesture, making me slap his arm to make him stop. I heard one of the guards near us chuckle quietly.

"Grow up," I growled.

He laughed and held up his hands in surrender. "You're the older twin. And you're a queen while I'm a lowly prince consort. I think you're the one who should grow up since you're the one sneaking prince consorts into your bedroom every night."

"He's not a prince consort yet, you know."

"Oh, forgive me. I meant to say commoners. Or do you prefer peasants?" Ahren was clearly getting a kick out of this whole situation. This conversation was going absolutely nowhere.

"I'm going back to bed so that I don't look like a zombie today. Do me a favor and forget that you ever saw anything in my bedroom this morning, okay? I would really like to live long enough to get married."

"Please, Dad wouldn't hurt a fly."

I laughed. "It's not Dad I'm worried about," I muttered. "Go get a couple hours of sleep, take the morning to relax and hang out with Kaden and Osten. Then I have a surprise for the family tonight. You'll like it."

"Sure thing." He left me to start walking down toward his old bedroom. "You may want to start brainstorming a better escape plan for Erik though. I can't promise that I won't tell Osten."

I groaned, walking back inside my bedroom. Eikko was wide awake and stretching his arms across our pillows, a sheepish smile on his lips. "Would you think less of me if I told you how terrified I am of your brother knowing about us sleeping together?"

"No, I think you're very smart to be scared of him," I said. "He won't say anything though. He really doesn't have any room to speak. He did elope and subsequently gave my mother a heart attack."

"Good." He pulled me close and kissed my shoulder. "Because I have no intention of letting you go anytime soon."

The door cracked open again and Neena's voice filtered through. "Your Majesty, sorry to wake you but there's been some confusion with the decorating for the welcome dinner that we need you to resolve."

Eikko and I both sighed. "Never mind," he mumbled, kissing my shoulder again.

I dressed in comfy capri slacks and a simple summer blouse, knowing that I'd have to change again for the surprise. It turned out that the decorating issue was part of a larger issue with the seating arrangements, requiring Eikko and I to redraw our seating chart because the Italians could not be seated by Governor Tailor of Clermont, one of the most conservative governors we had in Illéa. Eikko handled it calmly, patiently going through the chart with me and getting my input on who could sit with who. After that was sorted he was called away for final approval on the menu and our day had officially begun.

Due to the impending influx of guests and the Great Hall being decorated for the first night's dinner festivities, we were all sort of left to our own devices for meals. Mom was resting – per Dr. Cleary's orders – so she and Dad were obviously eating breakfast in their room. With Ahren being back in the country for the first time in weeks and Eikko being temporarily indisposed, I took the opportunity to arrange a breakfast just for us Schreave kids.

We ate in Ahren's room since it was the cleanest. Kaden and Osten were already there, piling fruit and chocolate and whipped cream onto their waffles. At least it meant that I could avoid meeting Ahren's eyes and didn't have to really acknowledge him until after I fixed my plate and sat down with them. Kaden was telling Osten about some new gun he wanted to get for hunting. I sighed, not knowing how much I missed having all three of my little brothers together until then.

"How're things in France, Ahren?" Kaden suddenly asked, his eyes wide as he waited for the status report from another country. Somebody get that kid a crown already.

"Fine," he said vaguely. He pretended to be nonchalant but I could see the way his eyes hardened. "How's Josie?"

"Josie?" I asked before Kaden could answer. "What about Josie?"

Kaden narrowed his eyes at Ahren. "Don't try to change the subject. Are things still tense with North Africa? You should consider sitting down with their leaders, seeing if you can lend them aid."

"Forget North Africa. I want to know all about how Eadlyn's domestic aid initiative is coming," Ahren said. He sipped his coffee coyly.

"Can we please go back to Josie?" I asked, holding my hands up to both of them. And then the three of us were talking over each other, trying to deflect the attention and questions that we didn't want to answer, our voices gradually rising until we were practically shouting.

Osten finally called out, making us stop, "North African leaders have no interest in meeting with the French for aid, Kaden has a crush on Josie and wants to ask her out, and Eadlyn's aid initiative is moving forward on a temporary basis until they can find a way to fund it permanently. There. Everyone happy now?"

"That's great news, Eadlyn!" Kaden exclaimed.

I held up my hand to him, staring down my twin brother. "What's this about North Africa?" He was quiet, avoiding looking at any of us. He simply focused on his bacon. "Ahren?"

"We've been keeping it from the press as best as we could. Lord knows how _you_ found out," he said pointedly to Osten. "They're just harmless threats so far. There's nothing we can do but tighten security in and around the country."

"Threats?" Kaden repeated.

"From the rebels there. They're threatening most of the countries in Europe, primarily the ones on the Mediterranean. Italy should be the most worried since they're closest to where the rebels are based. They basically just want to seize control of Europe and conquer everyone there. These rebels are a whole new breed of insane, thinking that they can actually rule the world."

"That doesn't make them any less real, Ahren. If anything it makes them even more lethal," I told him. "If they're crazy enough to believe that they can take over the world, what would stop them from seeking extreme measures to ensure that they can do it?"

"Eadlyn's right," Kaden agreed, making me raise my eyebrows. "They may be threats from what seems to be an unstable group of people, but their instability makes them terrifying. This isn't something to be taken lightly—"

"Jesus, I know!" Ahren exploded, slamming a hand down on the table. We all jumped. Anger wasn't something typically expressed so blatantly in our home. Not around each other or directed at each other. We grew up in peace and were taught to always strive to maintain that peace. "I'm sorry. I was just hoping to come here and not have to worry about any impending invasions."

I reached a hand over to hold his, giving it a little squeeze. Our hands looked different with my hand sporting my signet ring and his sporting a wedding band. The significance held in the little symbols on our fingers should have made us seem older than we were but we were still only teenagers. Teenagers and already responsible for entire nations. "Then let's not worry about it, okay? You and Camille can discuss it with General Leger once she gets here but for now, let's just be a family."

"That sounds like a great idea." Dad's voice floated across the room to us from where he was lingering in the doorway. He was smiling at the sight of his four children all together under one roof but there was a rigidity to his smile. "I hope you don't mind that I need to steal Kaden and Osten. I just want to talk to them about some stuff before our surprise." His face was drawn and I could detect some nerves in the way his voice slightly shook. "What do you say? You boys want to go for a quick ride around the grounds?"

Kaden and Osten practically ran out of the room, breakfasts abandoned on the table. Ahren and I stacked our plates and at least tried to make some sense of the table before leaving it to the maids to clean up. "What was that about?" I asked Ahren.

"I'm assuming it's to do with his back," Ahren said in a level tone. "Sorry, I told him about your surprise but I figured he would need to talk to them ahead of time. To explain, you know."

I nodded, feeling my stomach turn to a bundle of knots. "When did you find out?"

"Our seventeenth birthday. We were out hunting and we both got really dirty and he knew Mom would freak if she saw us so dirty so we changed in the stables."

"I feel bad. He has to keep sharing that story over and over again. It's not fair to him to have to keep living with this."

Ahren smiled sadly. "But it's what makes Dad him. It's just another part of him. Like the massacre or Mom, it is what shaped him into the man we know as Dad."

"Did you know that the world used to celebrate mothers and fathers? Like, they would have a Mother's Day and Father's Day each year and on those days, people would celebrate their parents. We should bring that back," I mused.

"One reform at a time, okay?" Ahren joked, throwing his arm around my shoulders as we walked down the hallway toward my room.

Eikko opened the door before we were even halfway to my room, his face surprised to see my brother and I there together. They both stood still, frozen, taking the other in. I could see them assessing who had more possession of me and who needed to respect whom. Eikko was a few years older than him but Ahren had known me for my entire life. Finally, Ahren nodded and seemed to come to a decision in his head. He stepped forward, extending his hand to my fiancé. "At our palace in France, we have this huge race through the city for New Year's. You should come."

With an urgent nod from me, he gave Ahren a reluctant smile. "Okay. Yeah, sounds good."

Ahren hugged me one last time and then said, "I'll leave you two alone. Surprise is still on for one, right?"

"Yup. Do not be late." He just chuckled and walked away, his hands dug deep in his pockets as he headed back toward his bedroom.

Eikko grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. "What?" I asked breathily, giggling as his fingers played with the hem of my shirt. "Eikko, no, I need to get ready for the surprise. I need to change."

"I can help you with that," he said in a husky voice. His lips were on my neck, tickling me in the spot behind my ear.

I couldn't stop giggling. "What's gotten into you?"

He pulled his face away but kept his arms around me. "I haven't kissed you in approximately two and a half hours. Is that a good enough reason for me to devour you now? We can spare five minutes."

Every logical part of me urged me to say no, to push him away and insist that we get ready for the surprise. But that part was easily silenced by the swimming blue eyes of my fiancé, pouting slightly as he saw me weighing the pros and cons of taking five minutes of alone time with him. "Fine. Five minutes."

* * *

Mom was smiling more than I had seen her smile lately. The last couple days since her hospital visit had apparently been taxing on her. Her shoulders had been slightly hunched every time I had seen her and her smiles were forced. Today, though, as she watched Daddy and her children (and Eikko) play volleyball in the new pool, she couldn't keep her smile from being anything but dazzling. I had wanted to invite Lady Marlee and her husband but I also wanted this to be a fun family afternoon.

There was something significant about the way my father wasn't even batting an eye about being shirtless and exposing his scars in front of us. Ahren said that Kaden and Osten ran to him after their talk with Dad, pale and scared and dumbfounded. Osten had a harder time understanding exactly what Dad was talking about. As the baby of a loving and nurturing family where he was constantly spoiled, it was only natural for him to be unable to comprehend living in a much colder and more violent household. It seemed even more impossible that it was the kind of place where his father grew up.

Kaden took it all as only Kaden could: calmly and factually. He looked at the facts and analyzed the situation and immediately interpreted both sides of the story, informing Ahren that he wasn't the least bit surprised to see that our paternal grandfather had been so harsh to his heir with what we knew about how he ran his country. He said that he knew the late king had needed control in every aspect of his life and wasn't scared of resorting to violence in his own family to make that happen, just like he had with the war in New Asia.

Apparently Ahren was able to reassure them that their father was still the same and that if anything, he should have been more honorable in their eyes. Eikko asked me if I felt left out by not being included in this Schreave kid meeting but I quickly told him no. It was a conversation that Ahren had to have with them. As boys and non-heirs, they saw this ugly history of my family differently than I did.

The volleyball splashed into the pool next to me once again, giving the opposing team their winning point. I huffed. It turned out that I was no better at volleyball than baseball. I was a relatively competent swimmer, swimming lessons being something that Mom insisted we had as kids. "You're the heir of Illéa. I'd hate for you to be the most powerful woman in the world and not be able to swim," she had once claimed. Those swimming skills were definitely paying off since my team was housed in the deeper end of the pool where our toes just skimmed the bottom of the pool.

"Think you can manage without me?" I asked Ahren and Osten, my two teammates.

Osten raised his eyebrows. "I'm not sure you've noticed, Eadlyn, but we've kind of been playing without you this whole time." Ahren reached over and mussed up Osten's dripping red hair.

I rolled my eyes, slowly making my way out of the pool. The space was even better than I had imagined it. We had kept some elements of the conservatory and done landscaping on the outer limits of the glass walls, giving it an outdoor feel even though we were completely closed in by glass. The pool was shaped like a bean with one half plunging down to be twelve feet deep. There was a waterfall built in on that end with rocks rising eight feet up to give a bit of a thrill for jumping off.

Mom was taking advantage of the sun streaming through the ceiling and was lounging in the gauzy light of the tented lounge bed. I picked up a mojito from a tray of beverages and joined her after wrapping a towel around myself. "Someone seems pretty happy," I told her.

"It's like I'm living in a dream. A dream that your father and I have had since you were little but we were too scared of fulfilling. To see him playing in the water with you all and not a care in the world…it makes me wish we had been honest with you all sooner," she admitted.

I shook my head. "No. It was a secret you could have harbored forever. You were trying to protect Brice and you were trying to spare Dad's feelings."

Mom smiled slightly again and kept watching the boys splash around in the water. "You made a good choice, Eadlyn."

"Yeah?"

She narrowed her eyes at me suspiciously. "You two have been acting differently lately."

I bristled immediately. We had been careful in the last week to try to be casual around each other but we knew we were toeing a thin line of intimacy we had before we had sex and the new, burning desire to constantly be touching. I took a careful sip of my mojito. "We're just excited for our wedding," I told her.

"And the honeymoon, I'm assuming?" How did my mother know everything? How was it possible for one person to have so much knowledge and not be bursting at the seams to share it? "It will probably be nice to have more privacy than you have here at the palace."

"Oh, yeah," I agreed, thinking that maybe she didn't know. How could I figure out how much she knew without confessing to anything?

Finally, she started laughing. "Jeez, Eadlyn, you're as red as a tomato. If your indifference to your own honeymoon wasn't a giveaway, your face right now definitely would be."

My heart was pounding against my ribs as I negotiated my choices for a response. "Mom, I'm sorry. I know that you wanted me to wait but everything was just so crazy and we didn't want to wait so we—"

Mom held up a hand to stop me. "Just be careful." She was still watching Dad but her eyes slid over to the side to meet mine every few seconds. "You know that any baby conceived before you're married will be considered a bastard and not fit to inherit the throne, right?"

"We're being careful," I said quickly. Mom had already given me this talk, back when she and Dad explained to me how sex worked. They both told me how serious it was that I wait to have sex until I was married because a bastard child would be a disastrous scandal that I could never recover from. It was a conversation I wasn't soon to forget.

"Does he know that?"

"We've discussed it. I've given him the whole rundown on the laws of inheritance, Mom. We're being careful," I repeated. "It's not like I want that kind of scandal following me around for the next thirty years or so."

"Oh, it would be much longer," Mom muttered, something strange hiding in her voice.

I ignored her. "It's something that will change anyway with this constitution. My kids and grandkids will never have to worry about that. Children of unmarried parents will no longer be punished."

"Oh, honey, you of all people should know that a few amendments aren't enough to change something that the people have believed in and enforced for the last century. That reform isn't something that will be accepted over night."

"Am I a fool, Mom? Am I an idiot for thinking that this is all even possible?" I asked her quietly. Dad had Osten on his shoulders and Eikko had Kaden on his as they did a chicken fight. I couldn't bring myself to smile though. Not while my heart was so heavy with worry.

"There's never a wrong time for revolution, Eadlyn. It's the only way we can progress as a society and as a species." She finally looked at me fully, placing her hand on my knee. "You're going to worry that you're on the cusp of utter failure for the rest of your life but I can assure you that it's always when you think you're failing that it's the opposite. It's when you're most afraid of failing that you are on the verge of absolute greatness."


	9. Chapter 9

Illéans were not the most reserved people on the planet. When compared to cultures like the German Federation, the Saudis, or the New Asians, Illéans were downright scandalous. The English and Swendish were maybe on our level but they were quieter. I never considered Illéa for the quiet category.

Not unless there were Italians visiting.

"Her Majesty Queen Eadlyn Helena Margarete Schreave, as I live and breathe, wearing her queen pants!" Queen Nicoletta exclaimed as she breezed into the foyer of the palace. She was the last of our guests to arrive seeing as she was traveling the furthest. She would also be the first to leave unfortunately, something my parents were much more disappointed about than me. "I may have to actually bow to you now," she teased, embracing me.

There was once a time when Queen Nicoletta was slightly more retrained. Following her wedding when I was an infant and then prior to giving birth to her daughter she had tempered a bit. However, when I was eight, her husband's sudden death sent her into a tempest with everyone scrambling to pick up after her. Everything the Italians did, they did with passion. They reveled in the smallest victories and despair in the desperate times. Since Mom is a superhero she managed to help her closest royal friend while also caring for newborn Osten.

"Please, Queen Nicolatta, the only difference is a bigger crown. No need for bowing," I informed her.

" _Mia cara_ , I am so sorry I will not be able to make it to your father's birthday festivities. The personal invitation was so touching."

"Invitation?" I repeated as we started walking upstairs toward the rooms she always stayed in while visiting Angeles. "I invited you over the phone."

She laughed. "You did, but because she has this ridiculous sense of propriety, even with me, your mother sent me a formal invitation in the mail. Complete with a royal seal."

"Of course she did," I muttered.

Nicoletta took my arm in hers. "When will I be meeting your fiancé, _figlioccia_? The media is curious about him. We've had very little of him these past few weeks."

"I know, believe me. Gavril has been jumping down my throat, trying to get us on camera for another interview. I didn't want to take any press away from the summit though. After this madness all passes, we will do a pre-wedding interview. If Gavril behaves, I may even give him a full hour on wedding preparations," I said, only half-joking because I knew that a special on wedding prep was a given. "But don't worry, he'll be at all of our meetings and meals and he does live here. It's a big palace but chances are that you'll bump into him at some point. It's not like I keep him locked up for myself."

"Well isn't that a picture to behold?" Nicoletta chuckled. Her bold comment made me draw back before I remembered that she's just abrasive by nature. She elbowed me, giving me a secret smile.

We had just gone around the corner to the wing of the palace where she always stayed when we heard voices coming toward us. I turned and saw Mayor Goldsworth chatting warmly with none other than Eikko.

"Queen Eadlyn!" Goldsworth exclaimed, bowing and extending his arms outward as if finding me in my home was something victorious.

"Mayor Goldsworth," I greeted. I couldn't help but smile at him. No one ever could resist his sunny personality.

His eyes slid from me suddenly to Queen Nicoletta, stopping her from greeting Eikko. They locked eyes and Goldsworth smiled more softly at her. "Well, aren't you a lovely sight to have befallen me," he said in a more subdued tone than I had ever heard him speak.

Nicoletta's eyes lit up as she extended her hand to him. "Queen Nicoletta Gioia Bartalotti," she said quietly.

"Samson Goldsworth," he answered, falling into a deep bow. Much deeper than when he had ever greeted me. I must have been frowning sardonically because Eikko elbowed me lightly and gave me a look that told me to smile.

"I was just escorting Queen Nicoletta to her room," I said, trying to break the tension. It wasn't tension really. Nicoletta and Goldsworth were simply staring at each other. It was still a little uncomfortable to be witnessing.

Nicoletta waved a hand at me, still staring at Goldsworth. "I think I'll manage on my own," she said breathlessly.

"But—"

"We should go get ready for the dinner tonight, right?" Eikko asked loudly, cutting me off. He pulled me away before I could say anything else, practically sprinting down the hall with me trying to keep up. We slowed down when we made it up to the third floor. "Well, talk about sexual tension," he joked.

I frowned. "I'm starting to think there's a conspiracy to make all of my favorite leaders in this country fall in love with queens of other countries. I mean seriously, why couldn't have any of them fallen in love with their own queen?"

"Um, because one of them is your twin brother and the other one is a bachelor ten years older than you?"

"Nicoletta is ten years older than Goldsworth!"

"And I'm nearly four years older than you," he said, smiling. He found all of this hilarious. "There's no conspiracy and you know how Goldsworth is. It'll be a little fling and on Friday he'll go back to Kent, she'll go back to Italy, and it will all be in the past before the media can even get wind of it. Okay?"

I grimaced, worrying more about Nicoletta getting hurt than what the media would say. "I'm moving her on the seating chart to keep her far away from him."

Eikko held his hands up, surrendering and letting me do what I want. "But you know that if it's true love, nothing will be able to keep them apart?" I gagged dramatically as we walked to our room to get ready for dinner.

The thing about summits is that they were, in essence, not much more different than a regular day at work. Instead of meeting with advisers, I was meeting with other world leaders and mayors of Illéa, security was tighter and cameras were allowed in the palace for once but those were the only major changes. If you don't count my needing a more sophisticated wardrobe.

Eloise, Neena and I started planning my wardrobe two months before the summit, meticulously deciding which dresses I would be wearing and designing my new dresses. Of course I needed a new riding outfit for my planned afternoon of hunting with King Frederick from the German Federation and Mayor Bosdynn of Carolina. It was going to be a strange afternoon but the German king was showing interest in the opportunity of hydro plants for energy and Carolina had the biggest hydropower plant in Illéa.

I never got around to checking the seating chart and making sure that Goldsworth and Nicoletta weren't sitting together. It didn't matter though. When Eikko and I entered dinner on the first night with everyone present, Goldsworth had switched places with Bosdynn so that he was directly across from Nicoletta. Even from the other end of the table, I could hear him boasting about his vineyards to her. In fact, that seemed to be the popular topic of conversation. Everyone was curious about the possibility of making wine in central Illéa.

The next morning we were up bright and early and sitting in the largest conference room we could find. "The main purpose of this constitution is to outline the most fundamental laws and rights for Illéan citizens that will carry over into the constitutional monarchy. We will have a sound explanation for proceedings in the government within the constitution as well," Lady Brice explained, distributing the folders of information to everyone. "We asked those of you in charge of provinces to listen to the needs of your people so that we can have a document that sufficiently represents the needs of our people. We will start with Point A on Page 1 and go from there. Point A under Medical Practices is the age at which a person needs their parents' permission for any and all surgeries. You may proceed."

I was more than happy to sit back and watch my fellow leaders duke this one out. In the end I was going to have the final word that they needed to be of age to have the right to undergo surgery independent from their parents. Goldsworth paced the floor, giving a drawn out anecdote of a mother whose daughter was unable to get an abortion because she wasn't of age and ended up dying by initiating a miscarriage on purpose. He stood proud as a peacock as he argued with other people there over childrens' rights and I knew that most of it was just a show for Nicoletta.

The day continued in much the same fashion. Some topics were no-brainers, like funneling all immigrants through the same cities on each coast to ease the burden of organizing documentation. Other topics took hours to resolve, like gun control. Bosdynn seemed to be the only one for it.

"The country is no safer now than it was fifty years ago when citizens were allowed to be armed," Bosdynn told the group. "It's not guns that are burning down businesses and rioting in the streets."

"But imagine if guns were involved," Camille cut in. "It'd be madness."

"Not to mention, the rebels that committed the massacre that took the lives of my grandparents and nearly a hundred others possessed guns that had been passed down by people who once owned them. We haven't had a significant rebel attack since," Ahren pointed out.

Bosdynn shook his head. "They're rebels. Telling them that they're not allowed to have guns clearly doesn't prevent them from apprehending them. How many guards did they kill in the process of getting guns?"

And on it went. By the end of the first meeting, I wanted nothing more than to go to bed with Eikko and sleep until the meeting the next morning. Instead I had to host another dinner, this one with just the ladies invited to the palace, and then prepare with Lady Brice for the next day's talking points.

Camille and Josie both stepped in to help me with my hostessing duties. Josie didn't realize that it was an all-female event until she was already there though, looking disappointed to have missed an opportunity to see Kaden.

"You can talk to General Leger, you know," I told her. I was in the act of piling my plate with dessert, getting a disgusted look from Josie.

"About my boy problems?"

I laughed. "No, but he's not all that bad at giving advice about boy problems. He helped me. No, he can give you the details about Kaden's daily schedule so that you two can just happen to bump into each other from time to time."

"I can stalk him. How romantic," she said sarcastically.

"Sometimes love takes a little push."

She shook her head. "A little push would be wearing extra perfume, not being creepy."

"It was just a suggestion," I told her.

She softened slightly, pausing as she lifted a petite four off of the tray and dropped it onto her plate. "I appreciate it Eadlyn." She paused before saying, "I don't think I ever imagined getting boy advice from the queen of Illéa. Or actually getting to help her with an international summit."

"I don't think I ever imagined giving you boy advice for my brother," I told her. If I wasn't supposed to be on my best behavior with the prying eyes of the most powerful women in the world focused on me, I would have elbowed her. Instead I just smiled warmly at her.

The women's gathering also gave me the opportunity to speak with Camille. The photographer in the room jumped on the chance to get pictures of the two of us together, speaking cordially with each other. She assured me that Ahren was doing well in his job as future prince consort and his French was getting even better with each passing day. I asked her about any travel plans they had in the next few months. "The offer to honeymoon in France is still on the table, right?" I asked her.

"Oh, _oui_! We would love you to have you in our country!" she exclaimed. "There is an exquisite seasonal palace on the coast, just a half hour from us. You could stay there and stop by to see us on your way home."

"Are you sure? Your mother won't mind?"

Camille pressed her lips together uneasily. "She and Father are planning a trip to Saudi, immediately following your wedding."

"That sounds dangerous."

"It is," she said, her voice somber. "But it's their job as monarchs to make sure everyone is getting along, yes? They think they can do that by visiting them."

"Do send them my regards though. I'm sad she wasn't able to make it here for the summit."

"She saw it more necessary for Ahren and I to attend, since we will be ruling when these changes to your government take place. I daresay she was also looking for the chance to get the two of us away from the palace," she said, blushing.

I was vaguely aware of all the women in the room rising to their feet around me. I turned just in time to see Mom waving her hands at all of them. "You silly women, don't rise for me. I'm just an old woman embracing the opportunity to watch her daughter do good work," she said to them.

There were some chuckles as they sat again and resumed their conversations. Mom walked through the room, greeting Nicoletta gently and joining Lady Marlee by the windows. A maid immediately passed her a cup of tea. I watched Mom, my heart squeezing painfully at what I was seeing. Beneath the flawless appearance of a queen was the dark cloud of a very worried mother. Her eyes swept the room regularly but always landed right on me, as if she was using the excuse of observing the room to keep checking on me. And when she was looking at me, her mind was clearly at work with the way she was only barely answering Lady Marlee. She was more than watching me. She was preserving me in her mind.

I wanted to beg her to tell me what had her worried. She was in a room surrounded by some of her closest friends. She had been noticeably absent from all obligatory appearances with Dad's simple explanation that she still needed her rest to recover from her heart attack. That was nearly four months ago though. She needed more rest than she got when she was queen but from what Lady Marlee and Lady Mary were saying, she was getting between eight hours and twelve hours of sleep every night. So why did she still look exhausted?

Last time she had tried to bottle up all of her stress and not tell me anything, she had a heart attack. But what could I do? Mom was stubborn as a bull on her best days. I couldn't ask her to look after Nicoletta and how close she was getting to Goldsworth and add to her worry. I would have to tell Lady Marlee or Dad to keep an eye on their close Italian friend.

Early the next morning, I was woken up early to go to a briefing with the palace press team to hear about the peoples' response to the summit. Unless there was a wedding, Selection, coronation, scandal, or baby's imminent arrival happening in the royal family, the people were more than happy to leave us alone. Citizens on the other side of the country with mayors that weren't invited to the summit like Lakedon or Waverly probably wouldn't even know that it was occurring.

"People are responding well to this summit, Your Majesty," Abby, one of our many press secretaries, reported. "This is the first truly decisive thing you've done in making the transition to a constitutional monarchy and they like that. It shows that you're taking it seriously."

"Your Majesty, I would like to arrange for just a couple photographs to be taken during the session today. I think the people would respond well to that," Gavril suggested.

I nodded. "If that's what we need to give them, we'll give it to them."

"Perfect. We'll get those this morning and have them ready to circulate at primetime. Tomorrow we will be sending cameras with King Maxon, Prince Kaden, Prince Osten, and Sir Eikko on their fishing trip with the other gentlemen visiting this week. Then, Abby, make sure to have a photographer set up on the grounds to photograph Queen Eadlyn with King Frederick and Mayor Bosdynn while they're hunting two days from now."

Abby wrote down everything he was telling her with gusto. I was fairly certain that Dad said Gavril was training her to take his place as head press secretary. They had yet to pick someone to take over for Gavril as host on the Report. "Queen Eadlyn, would you like to write your own statement for how the summit is progressing or would you like to have one of us write it for you?"

"I'll have Neena write it for me," I told them, unwilling to have one more thing on my plate – no matter how small – but not wanting a stranger to write it either.

Gavril went over some other points with me to make sure we were on the same page for what we wanted to include in the constitution and what absolutely had to go my way to keep the people happy. We were able to adjourn relatively quickly though to get me on my way and get the press team working on arrangements for the rest of the week.

The morning session for the constitution was relatively calm (and boring, really) with the only thing on the agenda to discuss being the amount of power each new branch of the government would have. It was still the widely accepted belief that there would be a parliament of two elected ministers from each province, the advisers would retain their titles as head of agriculture and such, Lady Brice would see to primarily domestic affairs and I would be head of foreign affairs. The power was shared and the stress made equal. The details of elections and terms were what needed to be ironed out.

The afternoon session – the dreaded trade deal session – had only just begun when the guard that had been standing by me all day whispered to me, "Sir Fadaye needs to see you at your earliest convenience, ma'am."

"I'm in the middle of a council session for an international summit," I hissed back. I immediately regretted snapping at him when he was only the messenger. "He can't wait until this session is over?"

"No, ma'am. It's urgent, having to do with one of the mayors. A scandal, I believe."

"One of the mayors here?"

Eikko inclined his head at me slightly, also curious about what this scandal was. My eyes flicked between Goldsworth and Nicoletta. They both were still acting like flirty, hormonal teenagers around each other. It couldn't be about them.

"Yes, ma'am."

I sighed and looked over at Eikko. "Go. I'll hold down the fort." He dared to squeeze my hand, something that would have made Raelynn pass out on the spot if she saw him do it.

"Thank you," I whispered fervently. I stood, drawing all eyes to me. "I'm sorry ladies and gentlemen, but something has just come up that is demanding my urgent attention. I leave you in the care of Sir Eikko and Lady Brice while I attend to this." There were some mumbles but no outright protests as I made my way out of the room.

Gavril was in the hallway with General Leger and Dad. "It's Goldsworth, that bastard," General Leger grumbled, seeing the questions in my eyes.

I raised my eyebrows, even more confused. "We'll brief you in your office," Dad said, steering me toward my study.

"What is going on?" I demanded once we were safely behind closed doors.

"Someone leaked to the news that Goldsworth has been taking money from his education funds to help fund his vineyards," Gavril reported calmly but I could see his excitement at getting to do damage control on a major scandal.

"He's been embezzling?" I asked, looking for clarification. "But that's federal money. That's money that we allotted for him for public education, money that Mom worked hard to get for him. He can't take it and put it toward alcohol!"

Dad's eyes were apologetic as he said, "Yet he did."

"I always said that guy was bad news," General Leger fumed. "No man who is a bachelor by choice can be trusted with money. No offense, Gavril."

"None taken, General. That's why you all let me handle the scandalous pictures and videos that come through here."

"Can we get back to the topic of one of my allies in this constitution has been exposed as a fraud, please?" I snapped. "Where was this reported?"

"Not Kent. Hudson, of all places," Gavril said. "It aired on their afternoon news."

I frowned but then a light bulb went off in my head. "They've been fighting over control of the lake they share for years. Of course Hudson would dish a scandal about Goldsworth."

"Who would give it to them though?" Dad asked. "Someone had to be privy to some confidential information to know that he's been doing this and to sell it."

"Someone who has confidential information stored up and has the means of getting more. Someone looking for money, maybe? Someone who would love to see me fail and this constitution fail? I think we know who is behind this," I said. "It can only be Marid."

There was a collective sigh from all of us as we realized that it had happened. Marid had come out with his trump card and was using it to disrupt the best thing I had going for me in my reign so far.

"Aspen—"

"We'll start looking in Hudson for any trace of him," General Leger said, interrupting him with the beginnings of a plan. "He can't possibly leak a story to a news station without leaving a trace. I'll have my best agents on him."

"Marid Illéa does not leak any more stories, is that understood?" he asked General Leger and Gavril darkly. "Illéas will no longer have any place in this palace or a place of comfort in this country. I want Georgia and August under constant surveillance. He is not getting away this time." General Leger paced to the other side of the office as he barked orders into his headset, ordering a meeting in security from the sounds of it.

Gavril stepped forward. "How should we proceed with Goldsworth, Your Majesties?"

Dad looked to me for my answer, clearly leaving this fight to me. My fury at Marid had been reawakened but it was quickly simmering down and being replaced by my anger for Goldsworth. I should have known not to trust a man so dazzling and so precocious. I should have known that he would have skeletons in his closet. "Bring him here," I said decisively. Dad nodded in approval.

As Gavril stepped outside to get him, Dad softened slightly. "Are you okay?"

"Will I ever be able to trust anyone?" I asked distractedly, staring at the plush carpet beneath our feet.

"Power turns even the best people into desperate fools. It's a hard lesson to learn. Over these next few months, you'll build a team of allies. Neena, Brice, Josie, General Leger, some of your other advisers…Gavril," he added with a chuckle. "They'll be your inner circle. You'll learn to hold everyone else at arm's length."

I sighed and leaned into the arm he was offering me. "Why couldn't we have just been farmers or owned a restaurant or been scientists like Uncle Gerad? How is it fair for me to have been put in this position?"

"I don't know Eady. It doesn't seem fair, does it?" He rested his head against mine and we stayed like that until we heard Gavril's voice coming from outside the door.

Goldsworth walked in, eyebrows raised, looking for the reason for why he was being summoned to my office. Dad walked around my desk to stand behind Goldsworth as I stared him down. "Is it true that you've been taking money from your federally aided public schools to help boost production in your vineyards?" I asked him, getting straight to the bottom of it. His eyes widened and he sputtered, looking for words. The truth was clear in his reaction. "Mayor Samson Goldsworth, I hereby revoke your title as mayor and your privilege to be part of the constitutional committee. You have an hour to leave my home and be on a plane back to Kent."

"Your Majesty, please, just let me explain—"

"I would listen to her, if I were you," General Leger cut in. "The longer you're here, the higher the likelihood that you'll have to answer to Queen America. And it was her public education initiative that got you that aid money in the beginning. It is best for you to accept Queen Eadlyn's mercy and vacate the premises immediately."

"I just wanted to make an impact. I was planning on giving the profits of the vineyards back to the schools, tenfold, if you could just give me the chance," he begged.

"No!" I slammed my hands down on my desk, making everyone in the room jump. My palms stung but I ignored it. "Do you realize what you've done? You've jeopardized this whole summit by being exposed as a corrupt, careless, alcoholic criminal! You are no longer an employee of the queen and you are certainly no longer welcome in anything with the Illéan seal on it."

Goldsworth gulped and nodded. "What of my vineyards, Your Majesty?" he asked, turning back on his way out.

"They're your problem now, Samson. Seeing as you've just lost your job and all credibility that would recommend you for another one, I would sell them. Something is telling me you'll need the money in the coming months," I said coldly.

He bowed his head one last time before walking out of the office, eyes forward so that he would have to face the men standing inside the office that would protect me to my dying breath and were thus infuriated by his actions as well. The office was silent for several moments as everyone waited for me to make the next move.

"General Leger, have someone inform Sir Eikko that he will have to be in charge of the rest of the session this afternoon while I attend to this mess," I said, running a hand through my hair. I slid off my black shoulder and draped it across the back of my chair. "Gavril, call in the press team so we can start discussing damage control." I waited for everyone to leave before turning to Dad. "You should tell Mom. I don't want her finding out about this by watching the news. She should hear it from you."

Dad nodded and kissed my forehead. "You sure you're okay?"

I smiled grimly. "I will be once we get this all sorted out."

"Do you want Eikko?"

"No. One of us needs to be in there and whatever mess we've made with Marid is my fault. We're both exactly where we need to be." Dad nodded once and then left the office.

We spent the remainder of the afternoon discussing the need for me to be even more on point for the rest of the summit. Gavril said, "Goldsworth was a poisoned apple for this summit. Now we need to make sure the damage stays isolated to him." If the people couldn't trust my decision-making for the people forming this constitution, they couldn't trust the constitution itself.

With the resolve to being on my best, most regal behavior for the rest of the summit, I stumbled into my bedroom where Eloise was waiting with my dress for the evening. "We don't have much time, do we?" I asked her when I realized that I didn't know what time it was.

"Unfortunately not, ma'am. We have just enough to have you looking magnificent for dinner," she said apologetically.

"And where could I find my prince consort? Have you seen him?"

"He was in briefly to check to see if you were here. He left to get ready himself. That was a while ago though so perhaps he'll be here soon," she reported.

Sure enough, just as Eloise was touching up my curls again, Eikko strolled through the door of my bedroom with a folder tucked under his arm. "Eloise, my hair looks just fine. You can leave me for the night."

"Okay, Your Majesty. Enjoy your evening," she bid. She put the curling iron down and turned it off carefully. "Watch this while it's still cooling down."

I gave her a thumbs-up and watched her go. I met Eikko by my bed, reaching to hold him by the arms. "How was the rest of the session?"

"How about we not talk about work for a few minutes?" he suggested.

"Then what will we talk about?"

He smiled. "How beautiful you look right now. And how much I want to kiss you right now." He leaned down to press his lips to mine. "It's torture to sit through those sessions without being able to touch you. You're gorgeous but this little line here makes me worry," he said, brushing his thumb between my eyebrows as he spoke

"Sorry. It's just been a long day." I sighed and leaned my head against his shoulder. I glanced at his watch and saw that we had a few minutes before we had to leave. "Tell me a story. Something happy or funny."

"Okay. Hmm, let's see." He paused, thinking about it. As he spoke, his lips were in my hair. "Growing up, my sister was actually better at learning her English than me. I was six when we were at the market one day – a Swendish market – she was going through and teaching me the English words for things being sold. Well, we passed a linens vendor who was selling pillow cases. Unfortunately I couldn't quite pronounce pillow correctly and with my accent, it came out as _pillu,_ a Finnish word."

"Which means?"

"It's, well…a four-letter word that starts with 'c' and rhymes with runt." I giggled. "I was much too young to know what that word meant. The vendor certainly did though, especially when I said it while looking at her. I've never seen my sister run so fast than when she was pulling me out of the market and away from the vendor." I laughed at the mental image of six-year-old Eikko running out of a market, dragged the whole way by his sister.

"I don't have any pictures of you when you were younger," I suddenly realized. "You brought the ones from home but you're just a teenager in them. I want to see what you looked like when you were little."

He grew quiet, sober. "My parents would have them all."

"Oh. Never mind then."

"No, I should call them. Perhaps I'll do that next week and ask my mom to send some." He called his parents once every couple weeks. He was busy so he didn't have much time to spare and from what I heard, the conversations were stilted but he still made the effort. He said that as long as they kept answering, he would keep calling. They hadn't moved to Swendway yet. Though they hadn't RSVPed to the wedding, they weren't leaving the country.

"Would you like to go to Swendway?"

He lifted his head up. "What?"

I looked up into his eyes. "We have the ability. We can go while we're on our honeymoon. We could visit your sister and see your other family members."

"We actually could?" he asked, his eyes lighting up with excitement.

"We could. Do you want to?"

"Actually, about my sister, I have a different request."

"Okay."

"I'd like to invite her to the wedding."

I gasped, realizing that I'd been foolish enough to not even think of that. "Oh goodness, Eikko, I'm so sorry. I didn't even think of that. Of course you can invite her! Wow, yeah, invite her tomorrow. She and her family can stay as long as they want."

"Eadlyn, do you realize what today is?"

"…No?"

"It's August 17. We'll be married in less than a month."

I smiled, the though of being his wife making my stomach swoop. We would officially have our lives linked. As terrifying as it was, I couldn't help but think that a month was much too long. I wanted to marry him tomorrow. In one month, we would be in France, husband and wife, prince consort and queen. "I can't wait."


	10. Chapter 10

I wanted to kill Marid Illéa.

In the days following Gavril's pronouncement that with my approval ratings plummeting, we needed to do _something_ for my father's birthday, I found myself spending an increasing amount of my spare time daydreaming about his death. No longer was it satisfying for me to receive a report from General Leger that guards had found him and killed him. Now I wanted to be the one to issue the order of his death myself. I wanted to cut out his tongue, burn down his house (with him inside), and then hit it with a nuclear warhead just for good measure. It was one thing to mess with my reign. It was another to ruin my parents' happiness.

I was positively seething as I sat in the wings of the stage as Mom and Dad did a special Report interview with Gavril, celebrating their twentieth wedding anniversary. Their wedding anniversaries had abruptly taken a back seat due to the Selection and my own impeding matrimony. Even so, people had stopped really observing them after Kaden was born and they had many royal birthdays to celebrate instead.

"You're smiling like a shark about to eat a dolphin for dinner," Eikko whispered to me as I watched Mom effortlessly navigate Gavril's probing questions. Why couldn't I have that same poise?

"Is that a good thing or bad thing?" I asked through my teeth.

"Considering you're supposed to be happy for your parents and you look like you'd rather rip out their teeth, I would say it's a bad thing." I sigh and let my face fall. None of the cameras facing me were on anyway. My cheeks hurt from being forced to smile for so long. "Where are you?" he whispered tenderly.

He wouldn't leave me alone about it if I told him that it was nothing, so why not let him share my misery? "Hudson, Kent, Panama."

Eikko seemed to be expecting Hudson and Kent but he was clearly surprised to hear about Panama. "Panama? Ah, the hurricane." He nodded. "Any word from Kile?"

"No. Not since I told him that we could send them supplies to help prepare for it's landfall and he turned me down."

"Idiot," Kaden muttered under his breath, sitting on the other side of me. "Does he seriously think that he's better off on his own? This hurricane is bigger than any other hurricane that's hit the area in over fifty years. You should be evacuating everyone, Eadlyn."

"He'd never forgive me if I forced him to leave."

Kaden raised his eyebrows at me. "Yeah, because Kile's regard for you is more important than the lives of the citizens in Panama," he said sarcastically.

"Shut up, Kaden," I snapped. "The mayor of Panama evacuated everyone at my suggestion; Kile isn't held to that order since he is an employee to the crown. And if they really don't think I care, I'm visiting them for a couple days after my honeymoon."

"Excuse me, peanut gallery?" Mom's voice piped up with laughter from the rest of the crew in the studio. I blushed, realizing that everyone was looking at us. Thank goodness none of us were wearing microphones. "Seems that even after eighteen years of being on the Report, they still can't keep their mouths shut for a whole hour and listen to their boring mom and dad," she teased. "Some things don't change, after all."

We all apologized and went back to sitting straight in our chairs, staring ahead with graceful smiles and glassy eyes. Osten was probably the only one who had managed to sit through the whole Report quietly, thus far. He had been relatively quiet overall in the last few days. I thanked my lucky stars that we only had to suffer from one prank during the summit that was pulled on Nicoletta where he switched out her wine for squid ink. Since the end of the summit, though, I had rarely seen him with a phone pressed to his ear or running around up to no good.

Following the Report, all of the members of our family – Ahren, Camille, Mom, Dad, Ostin, Kaden, Eikko and me – gathered in the family room on the third floor that had always been our family meeting space. Dad's birthday was the next day but he had made it pretty clear that he and Mom wanted their alone time, especially since they were finally properly celebrating their twentieth wedding anniversary. We ate chocolate cake and laughed and exchanged presents, none of us the wiser that anything could have been wrong.

Early the next morning, Eikko and I had a briefing with General Leger about the search for Marid in Hudson and Kent. "So far, my agents have had very little to report," he said sadly.

"How?" I demanded.

"Marid is a ghost. He's proving to be a much more difficult target to apprehend. Every time we think we are on him, he disappears without a trace. I'm pulling my guards out of Hudson. There's no reason for him to still be there, if he even was there. He tipped off that Hudson news station on the phone."

"That's not good enough!" I exclaimed. "We need to find him and get him here before he can do any more damage."

"What do you want me to say?" he fired back at me. "I want to find him just as much as you, Eadlyn. He's just a few steps ahead of us."

"How?" Eikko asked calmly, his arms folded.

General Leger looked perplexed. "He had ears in this office for almost two whole weeks. He knows your moves, how you think, how you react."

I collapsed into my chair and covered my face with my hands. "We have to find him," I groaned.

Eikko's soft footsteps got closer and then his hands clapped down on my shoulders, digging his thumbs into the tense muscles there. "We'll find him. It's just one of him against the whole royal guard. He'll make a mistake eventually and that will lead us right to him. After that, you can expose what he's done and convict him." With his gentle tone of voice, I actually believed him.

General Leger cleared his throat. "I'm sorry, Your Majesty, but we actually won't be able to convict him."

Eikko's hands stopped moving as we both tensed. "What?" I asked.

"Unless you want to release all of those recordings that he's using to blackmail you which would then release all of your secrets, you have nothing to prove that he's done anything wrong." He shook his head. "It's a genius plan, actually. He knows that you'll never risk your approval ratings just for the sake of arresting him."

"I wouldn't risk my approval ratings for the sake of arresting him," I agreed. "But I would risk them for the sake of killing him."

We all pretended that we didn't see the little flash of a smile on General Leger's lips. "Not that I don't agree with the idea of killing him, we need sufficient reason. If he puts your life in danger, he can be killed. But treason? Treason that you can't really prove without exposing yourself? We can't kill him."

"There has to be _something_ to trace," Eikko urged. "We have one of the world's most powerful militaries at our disposal and we can't locate one measly rebel?"

"One measly rebel who happens to be the son of two of the greatest rebels this country has ever seen. Even if they aren't helping, August and Georgia have surely given him some pointers for how to fly under the radar. Not to mention the fact that there are plenty of other rebels still lingering that would be more than willing to help him," General Leger explained to him. Eikko put his hands on his hips and both men looked to me for answers.

I chewed on my bottom lip, my mind processing. Wars and treaties would come and go but this was a moment that would dictate my reign. I could feel it in my bones. I had to get Marid while he was still in striking distance. "You said he called the news station to tip them off?"

"Yes."

"Can you trace the call?"

"Do you know how many phone calls a news station gets every day? It's been nearly a week since the phone call. You expect us to comb through each one?"

I finally met General Leger's eyes again, him clearly reading the fire in mine and standing up straight. "If it's your only chance of finding him, then you will do it."

Eikko frowned and crossed his arms again. "What if he used a burner?"

I shook my head. "Maybe he did use a burner but I doubt he did. I'm sure it's a secure line of some sort but if he is working within a rebel underground and getting assistance from them, he would have a phone secured just for that."

"It's valid. Marid thrives on gossip," General Leger said in agreement. "He would need something for people to supply him with that gossip. It would be a cell phone of some sort."

"What if it's snail mail, though?"

General Leger narrowed his eyes in thought, considering it. "He wouldn't do that. It's too slow and too easy to trace. A lot could go wrong with a paper trail. No, he has to have a cell phone. Or…" He trailed off, something igniting in his mind. "The radio."

"The radio?" I repeated. But then I figured it out too. "How the rebels communicated twenty years ago. Radio chatter. Do we still have our spies in northern Sota?"

"They can get there."

"What's in Sota?" Eikko asked, lost.

"Sota, Hudson, and Denbeigh meet in one corner in a town called Satellite that is also the central most point in all of Illéa," General Leger explained, starting to walk out of my office. We followed him down to the office located exactly between my office and Mom's personal study. He leaned over one of the tables housing a map of Illéa with his troops locations on it. He pointed to that one corner of Denbeigh, Hudson, and Sota. "Denbeigh negotiated a deal with Maxon and America to not house any troops if they patrolled it themselves. Hudson has been a bit volatile lately with their negotiations with Kent for the lake so I moved most of our troops in Sota to Hudson. I can get my spies to Satellite by dinnertime tonight."

Eikko was obviously trying to play catch up. "And why are we sending spies to Satellite?"

"Because Satellite is the very center of Illéa, they are the center of radio communication in Illéa, via satellites," General Leger said, raising his eyebrows as if it was self-explanatory. "If Marid is communicating with any old colleagues of his parents through radio chatter, they'll hear it in Satellite. I have spies specifically trained in this sort of stuff. If they work in there for a few days, they should be able to find something."

I nodded in approval. "That will have to work. Can we have IT looking into the phone theory from here? It's dangerous for them to get caught. I'd like for them to have the safety of the palace if they're spying on a traitor."

"I'll tell them right away," General Leger promised, bowing his head.

"Good. I expect a report by this evening, confirming that our spies are on the ground in Satellite and IT is going through the phone records," I told him. "Marid's not getting away this time."

General Leger followed us out of his office, saying, "With all due respect, Eadlyn, but I think you can officially call Marid a terrorist."

"He's a terrorist but we can't convict him?"

"We'll find a way," he swore.

A door at the end of the hallway opened and Dad emerged, dressed in the same clothes he was wearing the day before. We all stopped and watched him walk quietly and carefully down the hallway to the entrance of a secret passageway. General Leger cleared his throat loudly, making Dad jump when he saw us standing there, watching him.

"Dammit, what are you all doing out here?" Dad asked, looking shocked to see us standing in the hallway between all of our offices at nine o'clock on a Wednesday morning.

"Working," I said. "What are you doing?"

He straightened and stammered, searching desperately for an excuse. "I'm playing hide-and-go-seek with Osten."

I ignored the fact that Osten had graduated from hide-and-go-seek level mischief before he was even five years old. "In yesterday's clothes?"

"He woke me up early. I put on the first thing I could find."

There were many things my father couldn't do. He couldn't cook, he couldn't command armies (at least, not very effectively), he couldn't play baseball, and he definitely could not tell a convincing lie. We all let it slide and waved at him as we went our separate ways from General Leger. I felt infinitely times better leaving him to go fulfill our mission of finding Marid than I did a week ago when he was just going to let his troops handle it. With technology and elite spies involved, he would have to keep closer tabs on everything and have more information to report firsthand.

"What do you have next for the day?" I asked Eikko.

"A thrilling meeting with the chief of parks and tourism in Illéa to discuss the current upkeep of our national parks," he answered, feigning enthusiasm dramatically.

"I'll trade you that meeting for a meeting with Raelynn for final approval on fabrics being used at our reception for chair covers."

Eikko smiled quietly. "I think I'll leave that one to you, tempting as it is."

"Are you sure? It's really exciting stuff. One wrong choice in silk and New Asia could declare war on us, all because of a chair cover."

"I think we should avoid that risk altogether and skip the chair covers," he suggested.

"Ah, but the German Federation would be deeply offended by having to sit on naked chairs."

He laughed. "You're cute when you're talking about the maintenance of world peace."

I nudged his shoulder playfully. "Lunch in my study at one?"

"How about on your balcony?"

"I like the way you think. One o'clock, my balcony. Be there or I'll eat all of the halibut myself."

He clutched his heart, pretending to be wounded. "Not the halibut!" he exclaimed, making a guard stationed near us chuckle.

I was on my way down to dinner that night when a guard told me that I was needed by the front doors of the palace. He didn't give me any serious details other than there being guests that the queen had to welcome. An unfamiliar female voice echoed through the hallway as I turned the corner. The guard stationed at the corner frowned when he saw me approaching. "Your Majesty?" he greeted reluctantly.

"Officer Miles," I answered, flashing him a smile.

I finally entered the main foyer and gasped as my eyes landed on someone I hadn't seen in over ten years and had only seen in pictures since then. Next to him stood a pretty woman with light brown hair and bad highlights. Her makeup was clearly done herself with the way one of her eyebrows was filled in slightly darker than the other.

"Eadlyn," Uncle Kota said, holding his arms out to hug me. I actually clasped my hands behind my back to make it clear that a hug was not welcome. I hadn't seen him in a decade and he barely had the decency to send us presents for Christmas and for our birthdays with cards full of vague well wishes. Other than that, he was a stranger to me. I wasn't about to hug him. He got that. He swept his arm over to the woman standing at his side. "This is my wife, Leah."

"It's an honor to meet you, Queen Eadlyn," she said, actually being smart enough to curtsy. That was more than I could say about Uncle Kota.

"Likewise." I narrowed my eyes. "What, exactly, brings you here? To my home? Without an invitation?"

"Actually, my sister invited us," Uncle Kota said. His tone was somewhat defensive and possessive, as if the fact that Mom was his sister made him more important to her than me. "I believe your aunt and other uncle are arriving later this evening."

I raised one of my eyebrows. "My mom invited you?" I asked dubiously.

"At the insistence of your father, I'm sure." When it came to Uncle Kota's relationship with my father, he was absolutely delusional. He believed that my father was what kept him in my mother's favor. It wasn't true at all though. Unlike Mom, Dad saw no reason to reconcile with Uncle Kota. There were two men that Dad essentially forbade any of us from reconciling with. August Illéa was one, Uncle Kota was the other. Mom tried to get back on civil ground with Uncle Kota, especially after Aunt Kenna passed away but it seemed to be no use. Uncle Kota was what we was and no one could change that. He wasn't even invited to my wedding.

But Mom invited him to come to the palace on Dad's birthday. She knowingly invited one of the few people that Dad genuinely hated into her home _on his birthday_. Dad sneaking around the palace in yesterday's clothes, the invitation to an estranged uncle, Mom's obvious melancholia…something was very wrong and they weren't telling me.

I had no idea what to say or do. I didn't know which rooms they would be staying in and I didn't have the patience to invite them to dinner, a meal that was supposed to be shared with just us kids and our parents that evening. Uncle Kota did _not_ belong.

Luckily, Mom came to my rescue. Still looking worse for wear in sweatpants and a sweater and her hair in a messy braid, she welcomed Uncle Kota and his wife – I refused to call her Aunt Leah – with a tentative smile. I didn't say another word as she left to show them to their rooms.

I ran to the dining room, relieved to see that Mom and Dad weren't there yet. All of my siblings were though, along with Eikko. Ahren seemed to be regaling Eikko with the tale of my first time falling off of my horse. "Hey, yeah, we have a problem," I announced to them all, glancing anxiously at the door to check for Mom and Dad. "Uncle Kota is here."

"Uncle Kota?" Ahren asked, frowning.

"Like, _the_ Uncle Kota?" Eikko clarified.

I nodded. "He's here with his wife. Uncle Gerad and Aunt May are apparently on their way here too. Mom invited them all."

"For Dad's birthday?" Kaden asked seriously.

"No. If she wanted them here for Dad's birthday, they would have been invited here last night. Not tonight, before they're spending all day together tomorrow," I told them. "And she certainly wouldn't have invited Uncle Kota to celebrate Dad's birthday."

"So then why is he here? We didn't even invite him to the wedding," said Eikko.

"He hasn't been invited to anything in close to ten years," Ahren added. "Dad has wanted nothing to do with him. It must be serious if he's letting him come here, on his birthday, no less."

Osten pouted. "He gave me soap for Christmas one year," he mumbled petulantly.

"We need to get to the bottom of this," I said decisively.

"I'll help!" Osten volunteered, his hand shooting into the air. "I've been waiting for Uncle Kota to visit for years," he said, perhaps a little too enthusiastically.

Every bit of my conscience was telling me to say no to Osten. Uncle Kota was a very proud man; Osten could only make things worse by insulting him. This was the first time I'd seen Osten get excited about trouble in days though and I couldn't deny him this, no matter how much trouble I knew he could get into with Mom and Dad. "Fine. Just don't do any permanent damage," I reminded him.

"Unless it's to his pride," Ahren added with a wink. Camille nudged him and shook her head at him but even she couldn't keep from smiling at Osten.

"Want to have some Jacuzzi time?" I asked Eikko after dinner as we walked back up to the third floor. Camille and Ahren had disappeared for alone time (she claimed that she had work to do but Eikko and I didn't believe her one bit), Kaden went to his room to work on his lessons from his tutor, and Osten dashed off to start planning his attack on Uncle Kota, leaving Eikko and I with a glorious bit of free time.

"Ah, I would love to," Eikko said, "but I didn't get everything done this afternoon."

"Do you need help?" I would do extra work as long as it meant spending time with him.

He shook his head. "No, I should only be a half hour or so. You can head down and I'll catch up to you."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely. Take the time to relax, you need it." He kissed my cheek and continued up to his office on the fourth floor.

I took my time changing into my bikini and letting my hair down from its updo. I didn't have the heart to call on Eloise to tame it for me so I just braided it simply. If I looked at my reflection long enough, I could pick out the tiny things that made me resemble Mom. The shapes of my eyes were the same and the little line between my eyebrows from stress was most assuredly hers. My lips puckered naturally like hers; a quality that made her look slightly younger than she was by giving her a bit of a baby face. Dad had once said that people called her looks plain but I had never thought of her as anything but beautiful. I could only hope that with the combination of my grandmother Amberly and my mother, I could be just as gorgeous as them someday.

As I was passing a parlor on the second floor, I heard raised voices coming from within. It was the parlor that connected to Grandma's usual room she stayed in. Inside, I heard her voice rise above the other voices that were mixing together chaotically. "I don't know why we even are discussing this. This should be all of your own personal decisions," she said.

"Ames and I are just looking out for you all," Dad said, making me frown. I checked the hallway for guards and seeing that there were only Mom and Dad's personal guards standing at either end of the hall, I pressed my ear to the door. "After the loss of Shalom and then Kenna, we want you to be assured that you can have the best health care if you ever need it."

"You don't know anything about the death of our father. You only met him one time!" Uncle Kota exclaimed.

I turned my head slightly so that I could see through the crack. Aunt May and Mom were sitting next to each other, Dad standing protectively in front of them, squared off against Uncle Kota. Grandma was sitting somewhere I couldn't see in the slim portal I had to gaze through but I could see the edge of Uncle Gerad's silhouette by the windows.

"It doesn't matter how much time I spent with him. I know how important he was to my wife and her family, which has subsequently become my family. I may not know how it felt to lose Shalom as a father but I know how it feels to lose both parents to a violent act of terrorism and rebellion. Just like I want to prevent that from happening to my own children and have worked to get them the peace that would prevent that, I want to help you all avoid any other early losses." He reached behind him and held Mom's hand, no doubt thinking about how close we all were to losing her.

"Why aren't you insisting that your children get all of this testing done? The very woman who is queen right now could have this disease," Uncle Kota said harshly.

Mom sighed. "Kota, for heaven's sake, we know. We've known that since she was born. All of our children have regular checkups to monitor for any signs of heart disease. Are you really so pigheaded to be refusing world-class health care, offered to you from your monarchs, to make sure you live to at least be fifty?" she snapped.

"You're not my monarchs!" Kota exploded. "You're my little sister who pretends to be all high and mighty even though all you've managed to do in the last twenty years is dismantle the only sort of order this country had!"

"Oh please, you're just angry that you never got to be a Two," Aunt May muttered.

"I would have," he growled to her.

"I'll do it," Uncle Gerad said suddenly, turning away from the windows to look at everyone in the room.

There was a beat of silence before Grandma asked quietly, "Gerad? You'll do it?"

"Bess and I have begun talking about starting a family. I don't want to have kids if I won't be able to be there for them."

"Gerad, thank you," Mom said gratefully, putting her free hand to her chest in relief.

"This changes nothing, you know," Uncle Kota said, directing his words at Dad. "Her heart is still defective. She's still probably going to die because you swindled her into a job that was too stressful for her to handle."

"It's not her," Dad insisted.

Mom also jumped in. "This job is stressful for anyone."

"Yeah, but for a Five with an educated limited to what her mother could teach her at the kitchen table? It's not exactly good preparation for a life of trade negotiations and illegal arms deals. Although I guess it doesn't take much intelligence to pick out china, right, Sis?"

Dad stalked up to Uncle Kota so that they were nose to nose. "You do not come into my home and insult my wife's intelligence, understand? She is your queen, whether you like it or not. The minute you walked out of her life, you walked out of being her brother. Gerad is her brother, not you. We are trying to do something nice for you even though you have done nothing to deserve it. The least you could do is pretend to be grateful."

"The least you could do is pretend that you didn't see the advantage to picking a dirty little Five as your wife," Uncle Kota snarled. Mom gasped and Aunt May shot to her feet.

I was convinced that Dad was about to hit him. The air electrified as Dad took several heavy breaths. His hands were clenched tightly at his sides, trembling. He stepped back out of my view and released a shuddering breath. The crisis seemed to be averted. At least until Uncle Gerad took Dad's place in front of Uncle Kota and in the blink of an eye, had punched him in the jaw.

Uncle Gerad walked away coolly. "I'm not king. I can punch who I want," he said.

"Maxon, wait," Mom pleaded.

I just barely got out of the way of the door before it swung open and Dad stormed past me, not even noticing me standing there. I was expecting Mom to go after him but instead she stood and started yelling at Uncle Kota. No one was following Dad so I abandoned my mission to go down to the pool and followed him to the third floor myself.

He ducked into his personal study and was pacing when I poked my head in. "Daddy?" I asked timidly. I wasn't sure if I was overstepping my role as daughter by intruding but I wasn't just going to leave him alone if he was upset. He didn't tell me to leave so I stepped fully into the room, shutting the door behind me. "Daddy, tell me what's wrong."

"We didn't want to tell you. With the summit last week and then the wedding coming up, we didn't want to worry any of you." He paused and weighed his words, collecting his thoughts. "It wasn't heartburn back before the summit. Her bypass in the spring didn't cure anything. Her other arteries are still narrowing. Dr. Cleary has scheduled her for surgery next month."

"Next month?" I repeated, trying to absorb all of this information. My mind was reeling. "But, can you wait that long? If she's in pain…couldn't that be dangerous?"

"It's next month or before your wedding. She doesn't want to be recovering from heart surgery during your wedding."

I shook my head. "Dad, I my wedding is not nearly as impossible as her health."

"I know that! I just want my wife to be healthy," Dad said, pulling at his tie roughly to loosen it. "Did I do this to her, Eady? Is this my doing?"

"Dad, you did not cause this. Whether she's here as queen or in Carolina as a Five, she would have this disease. The only difference is that if were a Five, she wouldn't have any chance of surviving. Daddy, you've saved her."

"I'm sorry you can't just have a normal family, Eadlyn. Your cousins are constantly trying to overthrow your power, your uncle can't even be civil to his own family, and your mother and I can't even be a stable support ground for you to stand on."

I put a hand on his shoulder. "Dad, you are the best father I could have ever asked for you. I know that being king and a father and a husband is hard and somehow you manage to do it all for us. You have nothing to apologize for."

Someone knocked on the door. "Max," Mom sighed as she walked toward us. I stepped back so that she could wrap her arms around his shoulder. I could hear her whispering to him, too faint for me to hear what she was saying exactly from where I was standing. Realizing that I was intruding, I decided to take my exit.

As I was leaving, Dad said, "I'm so sorry Ames."

"Hey, listen to me," Mom told him fervently. "I've broken your heart too many times to count. It's only fair to let you break mine. It's only yours to break."

They seemed to have this fascination with breaking each other's hearts. I had a good feeling that it had something to do with how they fought during their Selection. When I found Eikko later that night in the Jacuzzi and told him about Mom, he just pulled me close. "I wish I could tell you that everything is going to be okay," he whispered, kissing my hair.

"Even if you could, I wouldn't want you to. I'm queen and queens don't rely on hope. We have to rely on logic."

He was quiet as I lazily traced a finger around his belly button. I tucked my head under his chin further so that I could listen to his heartbeat under my cheek. Finally he said, his chest vibrating as he spoke, "Not with me."

"What?"

"You're not the queen with me."

"It's hard to separate Eady from Queen Eadlyn."

He shrugged. "I'd like to make a proposal to my queen, then."

"Okay."

"A separation of church and state," he said simply, his thumb stroking my shoulder. "We can talk about work in our studies and anywhere on the fourth floor or even during meals but I want a safe word that signals time when we won't be talking about foreign policy or budgets or approval ratings."

I sat up but slung my leg over his so that we were still close. "Okay. And what do you propose that word is?"

"Perhe," he said decisively.

"Perhe? But I thought that was just a safe word in general for us."

He smiled slightly. "Perhe means family, right? Family means safety, security, love, comfort. I don't want to spend all of my alone time with you in worry. I want to have this time be something sacred between us, just like family. So right now, it's family time. And you're just Eadlyn to me and you're allowed to be weak because it's just you and me here and as your fiancée, soon-to-be-husband, and all-around confidante, you're more than welcome to fall apart in front of me."

"What if I can't stop? What if I let go and I can't go back?" I asked, barely holding my tears back.

"What if you don't ever let go? You'd explode and get shiny, red Eadlyn-shrapnel all over everyone."

I laughed miserably but my laugh turned into a sob and that was it, I was gone. I clung to him so tightly that was sure I would be sore the next morning. I eventually just climbed into his lap and curled up there, my forehead pressed to his breastbone, watching my tears drip into the water swirling around us. He seemed to know not to tell me that he loved me or that I would get through this. He just held me and then, when my sobs turned into quiet hiccups, he whispered simply, "Perhe."


	11. Chapter 11

The flowers were spectacular, my dress fit me like a glove, the guests were all arriving on time at the church and the priest, orchestra, and choir were all in place under Brice's watchful gaze. But because it was my life, something had to go wrong.

"Eadlyn, please do not throw up on the dress," Hale pleaded, looking unsure about my ability to hold back my vomit.

I held up a finger at him and swallowed thickly. "I'm fine."

"Drink," Ean urged, holding a glass of water toward me.

"I'm fine," I insisted. Mom's eyebrows were drawn together as she told Eloise to get more powder foundation ready to cover the sheen of cold sweat on my skin.

"Josie, can you get some seltzer water for Eadlyn?" Mom asked the closest person I had to a bridesmaid. Josie ran out to find a guard to ask for some seltzer water but we were already in the church – it was no use. We weren't going to find seltzer water there.

I ignored them all and clamped my mouth shut, dashing into the water closet set off of the narthex we were using for final preparations. What little food I had managed to eat that morning for breakfast came back up as I tried my hardest to suppress the natural instinct to cry that I always had while getting sick. Mom stood behind me, pulling the skirt of my dress tight behind me to make sure it was well out of the way and keeping my hair in place behind my head.

In the narthex, I heard Brice ask, "Where's Eadlyn? Everyone is ready and the boys are about to take their places."

"In here," Mom called to her.

Brice's heels clicked toward us as another wave of nausea forced me to face the toilet again. "Oh no. Oh no. Okay. Um, Maxon is out in the hallway with the photographer ready for the first look. Should I tell the coordinator that we'll be running a few minutes behind?"

"No," I groaned.

"Yes," Mom corrected. "Can you tell everyone to leave except for Eloise? I need a few minutes alone with my daughter and we'll need someone to touch up Eady's makeup."

"I can do that. Oh, and here. For her breath." I didn't look back but I knew that Brice was handing Mom the package of mints she always had in her pocket.

The worst of the nausea seemed to have passed so I straightened myself, leaning against the wall for support. "Does this count as my something borrowed?" I asked Mom.

She smiled pitifully and held out the container of mints, one of the tabs open so that I could reach in and get one. I let the strong taste settle my stomach. I leaned my head back against the wall, staring at the ceiling. "I've been ready for this day for the last five months. Why am I so nervous now?" I asked Mom.

"Becoming a wife is a big deal. It's not a huge transition for you, truthfully," she said, carefully putting one of my dark curls back in place. "The change in title, though, is everything. There is a lot more pressure in being a wife. At first, every little disagreement will feel like a complete loss and will shake you and you'll wonder if you made a mistake but eventually you'll find that it's okay to disagree with your husband. Healthy, even. In moderation, of course."

"Were you nervous on your wedding day?"

She smiled, her eyes twinkling as she thought back to that day. "I don't know a woman who wasn't nervous on her wedding day. Even Marlee, who got married with no one around but Carter, a priest and your father, was nervous. You're ready, Eadlyn," she urged me gently.

I met her honest gray eyes fully and asked her one last question. "What if I fall?"

"What if you never try flying?" she countered, recognizing the question I asked her frequently while I was a teenager, trying to navigate my early years of being a princess and the pressures that came along with that.

I joined her and Eloise out in the narthex then as Eloise reapplied my powder and my lipstick. Mom made me take one last sip of water just to be sure. Mom poked her head through the door and confirmed that the photographer was in place to capture Dad's first time seeing me in my dress. This moment was one of my top requests for my wedding day. I wanted to have this one moment with my father because I was his only daughter and I knew that this day was hard on him. It wasn't easy for him to let me go and we both knew that. This quiet moment with him before the wedding madness ensued was not just necessary but crucial.

"Go ahead," Mom said, swinging the door open.

Dad's back was turned to me and I walked up to him so I was just ten feet away, the photographer clicking away. "Daddy?" I asked softly, anxious for his reaction. Was I pretty enough for him? Did I still look like his little girl?

He turned and gasped softly when he saw me, putting a hand to his mouth. We both laughed giddily. "Eadlyn," he whispered from behind his hand.

I was barely aware of the photographer clicking away a few short paces from us. I only had eyes for Dad, mostly because I wanted to treasure this moment for the rest of my life but also because I was scared that he was about to pass out on the spot. I smiled gently at him, waiting for him to say something.

"Oh, Eady, you look so beautiful," he whispered. "More than beautiful, if there is a word for it."

I stepped up closer to him so that he could embrace me and I reveled in the feel of being hugged by my father. "I have something for you," I said quietly, waving to Eloise to pass me the small black box I had tucked away in the various suitcases that came with us to the church.

"You didn't need to get me anything," he said to me.

"No, but you say that every time I try to give you a present. Consider it as a thank you for everything you've ever done for me. It's impossible to put my thanks into one present or even one hundred presents but I hope that this is at least something you can hold onto and always remember me as your little girl," I told him. He slowly opened the box and looked inside, pulling out the silver watch I had designed for him at the royal jewelers. "Flip it over," I gently urged.

He frowned in confusion as he flipped the watch to stare at the backside of it, the side that traditionally had the battery and tiny screw heads visible. Tears started falling from his eyes in earnest as he read what was engraved on the underside of the watch. " _To the first man I ever loved_ ," he read aloud. He shook his head. "Oh Eadlyn. You will always be my little girl."

I didn't even know that Mom was there until I felt her hand on my shoulder. I rested my head against Dad's shoulder as she fastened the watch under the navy blue cuff of his military dress coat. The cuffs were tight and it wouldn't show but he would at least know that it was there.

"Are we ready?" Brice asked softly from where she stood by the doors of the narthex.

I turned to Dad for confirmation. He nodded. "We're ready."

Brice spoke into a headset that the ceremony could begin. From the other side of the closed doors, I could hear the music begin. My hands began to shake around my bouquet and I felt the nausea returning. "We're right here, honey," Mom whispered to me. "In just a few moments, you'll be with him."

I nodded. Of course. I could do this. I could suffer through the nerves for another minute and then I would see Eikko and have his hands in mine and then maybe, just maybe, I'd feel less like I was about to float away. Dad looped his arm through my right arm and Mom was on the left, both of them helping to guide me to the door.

They swung open right on cue, just as it had been practiced many times before. The congregation of guests rose to their feet and turned in my direction, some craning their necks to get a good look at me. As soon as we crossed the threshold into the cathedral, cameras lit up the space and I panicked, trying not to blink ferociously amidst the bright flashes. Mom squeezed my arm and that small gesture was enough for me to take a deep breath and get the rest of the way down the aisle. Ahren was sitting next to Camille and they both broke decorum and waved at me like lunatics. Their antics worked though because I laughed and the last of my nerves trickled away.

And then there he was.

My Eikko. Dressed in a formal military uniform similar to Dad's but lacking some of the medals and badges he had accumulated over his years as king. His dark hair contrasted perfectly with the golden crown sitting atop his head, gleaming in the sunlight pouring through the stain glass windows around us. Behind him stood Henri, because we didn't know who else we could have possibly asked to stand with him on this day.

"Ladies and gentlemen, honored guests, family, and friends, you may all take your seats," the priest said from his place in front of the four of us. Mom took a step away, sliding her arm out of mine gracefully. "We are gathered here before God and before all of Illéa to witness the unity of Her Majesty the Queen Eadlyn Helena Margarete Schreave to Sir Eikko Petteri Koshinen of Kent. Who gives this woman to be married to this man?"

I glanced at Dad, praying he could get the words out. "She gives herself, by the blessing of her mother and father."

Dad held my hand in his for a moment longer and my breath caught, waiting anxiously for him to proceed. He lifted my hand to his lips in an impromptu, gentlemanlike, paternal kiss before he placed it in Eikko's waiting hand. He and Eikko shared a meaningful look as Dad leaned forward to whisper something in his ear that made Eikko beam. Dad kissed my cheek one last time before he and Mom took the last two seats closest to the front of the cathedral.

Eikko held my hands in vices as we repeated the same vows that thousands upon millions of other couples had said in the same public display of their love for each other. There was no wedding ring for me since it was tradition for the king (now queen) to wear his signet ring in place of a wedding ring. Eikko's was just a simple platinum band that we would get a ring to match for me once I passed on the signet ring.

Finally, the priest instructed me to step beside him so that we were both facing the congregation and Eikko. He knelt down on the small, plush red stool and bowed his head before me as I read out his vows that would make him prince consort. They were the same vows that I had sworn to, that Mom and Dad had sworn to, and every Schreave before them. His eyes gleamed as he smiled up at me and I knew that he meant every word as he pledged his loyalty to our land. The priest pronounced him as prince consort of Illéa and then had him rise. We both faced the congregants than and he said proudly, "Ladies and gentlemen, I present you with Her Royal Majesty, Queen Eadlyn Helena Margarete Schreave de Koshinen and His Royal Highness, Prince Eikko Petteri Schreave de Koshinen."

This was one of the very few kisses we would ever be granted to have photographed for the world and the only day where public displays of affections didn't have to be at an absolute minimum. With that in mind, Eikko leaned in and kissed me fervently, sealing our marriage with his lips pressed firmly against mine. Our hands stayed clasped together as he brought his other arm around my waist, bending me backward slightly. I laughed into him, making him laugh with me.

The congregants rose to their feet and applaused while we made our escape back down the middle aisle, practically running back to the narthex. When the doors of the cathedral closed behind us, he swept me into another kiss. "I love you," he whispered. "I love you, I love you."

"I love you too," I answered, hugging him tight.

Mom and Dad came in with Kaden, Osten, Ahren and Camille right behind them, all of them circling us and caging us in with excited chatter. Mom hugged Eikko tightly and I just barely heard her whisper to him, "Welcome to the family."

"Another brother!" Kaden exclaimed as if he was just now realizing this.

Osten scrunched up his nose. "Another brother? I'm tired of brothers. You couldn't have married a girl, Eads?" I giggled and hugged Osten, ruffling his curly red hair playfully.

"I gave you a sister!" Ahren said in mock disgust.

"Yeah, but she doesn't live _here_ ," Osten argued.

Eikko hugged Osten from the other side. "Sounds like the one you need to talk to is Kaden." He winked to my middle brother, who blushed as his eyes flicked to Josie where she was standing with Brice and Eloise by the doors.

"Okay, okay," Dad said loudly, waving us in the direction of the car. "Let's go get these pictures over with so that we can relax before the reception."

This marathon photo shoot wasn't nearly as arduous as the one on the day of my coronation. That one was long simply because of all of the pictures with the Selected. Now it was primarily Eikko and I and our immediate family. Besides, there would be plenty of other photographs from the rest of the night.

The highlight of the reception came during the speeches. Ahren gave a wonderfully embarrassing speech, highlighting some of the most ridiculous things we had gotten into as kids. The crowd favorite seemed to be the outrageously recounted story of how we had decided that Dad's book of maps would make a great coloring book when we were four (it was my idea). Suffice to say, Dad had to get all new map books.

Dad and Ahren were really the only two supposed to give speeches but then, as Ahren took his seat at our table again, all of the guests seated at the table closest to us stood and took to the floor. The Elite stood in a single file line so that I could only see the one in front: Henri. My hand clenched onto Eikko's knee underneath the table as Henri withdrew a harmonica from his pocket and blew into it. It squeaked at first but he found the right place to blow into and then waved to the boys to do something. Then Gunner stepped out from behind Henri, reciting a poem that went along with the harmonica.

I pressed my free hand to my mouth as they each took a verse, slowly spreading themselves out on the dance floor. Their verses all had some sort of funny memory of myself and of Eikko in it. I shook my head when Fox said something about me having impeccable taste in asparagus and pointed at Kile teasingly when he said "The queen said no 'cause she thought Kile was vile."

All of the guests applauded loudly as the boys took their bows. They returned to their seats but Henri came up to our table and stood in front of Eikko and I. "You have good day, Eadlyn?" he asked me.

"Very good day, Henri," I assured him.

"Sorry I can't sing," he said.

I smiled and practically melted at his apologetic smile and bashful gaze. "You made the cake. That's probably the most important job of the wedding. At least for me." He blushed and gave a thumbs-up, saying something quickly to Eikko in Finnish before going back to the table. "What was that all about?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he said in a suspiciously high voice.

"Are you sure?"

"It's guy stuff."

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Mhmm," I sighed, touching my forehead to his shoulder for a brief moment.

Guests took advantage of dinnertime to come offer us their congratulations, including Eikko's sister. This was really my first time meeting her. I saw her at the tail end of breakfast but Eikko whisked her away to catch up and I was surrounded the women making me wedding-ready, making the opportunities for introductions limited.

"Eikko," she said brightly. Then she curtsied to me. She wobbled a little bit but for never having curtsied in front of a queen, I thought she did well. "Your Majesty."

"Lahja, please, call my Eadlyn. You are my sister, after all."

She beamed and smiled shyly. She had the same quiet presence as Eikko but didn't seem to suffer from the same crippling aversion to people he did. She actually seemed to thrive in social situations with her easygoing personality and uncanny ability to make people laugh. At least, it looked like she was keeping her table entertained. She flipped her long, black curly hair over her shoulder. "Thank you for inviting me to be a part of your special day."

"You're family now. We couldn't exclude you in good conscience." Eikko's eyes fell downward, as did Lahja's, as they both probably thought about their absent parents. "Have you met my family yet?"

"Yes! Ahren introduced us," she explained, nodding to where he was talking to Queen Nicoletta, Camille, and Mom. "Somehow they're even more wonderful in person than they seem to be on TV."

"Oh, just wait until the cameras are gone tomorrow. They'll be animals."

Lahja scrunched up her nose. "Actually, I'll be leaving again tonight."

"So soon?" Eikko asked.

"Unfortunately. Kaarlo needs to be back by Monday for work. I could find a substitute for my job but he's kind of important."

Eikko laughed out loud and nodded in agreement. I frowned and asked, "Why? What does he do?"

"He's a rancher. He and Lahja own over one hundred cows and going into winter…well, it's crunch time for them to be able to earn their profit." He put an arm around my shoulders as he explained.

"You need to go home to kill cows?" I asked, looking for clarification.

She shrugged. "It pays the bills. He's really enjoyed telling me these past few months that it would lighten the load if some smaller farmhands out there to help him. I kindly remind him that before they can be farmhands, they're reliant on me," she joked.

Eikko stood and walked around the table to hug her. "Thanks for coming," he said to her as they embraced.

"I'll look after Mom and Dad for you," she promised him. "And I'll get them to visit you, don't worry. Once Mom hears that I got to share my dessert with Queen America, she'll be dying to come."

"But Dad—"

"Dad would follow Mom into a fire without even thinking about it. It's her you need to convince. And she just happens to love me. Maybe if I give her a grandkid or two, we could thaw out her cold Swendish heart," Lahja said sarcastically.

"Maybe."

"It was lovely meeting you, Lahja," I said, hugging her when Eikko released her.

"You as well, _sisko_ ," she said tenderly. "We'll keep in touch. Call me if you need help keeping this boy in line"

I smiled fondly at Eikko. "I will, don't worry."

Lahja went back across the dance floor to meet Kaarlo and we watched them both leave the reception, hand-in-hand, waving at some of their newest friends. No sooner had she left than Kile was there, holding his arm out to me. "Care for a walk through the gardens, Your Majesty?" he asked me, his eyes meeting Eikko's as if he was really asking my husband for permission.

"Of course," I said, squeezing Eikko's hand before walking out to the gardens with Kile. "Today hasn't been too hard for you, has it?" I asked him once we were alone. I loved my wedding day and I loved having a day to simply celebrate being Eadlyn and Eikko but it didn't stop me from worrying about Kile.

"Eadlyn, I've always wanted you to be happy and I haven't ever seen you happier than you were today. That makes today pretty easy for me." He paused. "It does hurt a little though," he admitted.

"You'll find someone, Kile. Someone who can be right there with you as you follow what you're passionate about."

He laughed. "Yeah, while you pay for it," he joked.

"We all do what we can to help those we love," I told him, holding his arm closer to me as he steered us through the hedge maze. We weren't really paying attention to where we were going but we both knew the maze like the back of our hands; he would get us out. "You are happy, right?"

Kile took a long time to answer, clearly thinking through his response carefully. He was quiet for so long though that I was scared he simply wasn't going to answer. He pressed his lips together and then opened his mouth, only to close it again. Finally he said, "I'm happy rediscovering myself."

"Okay," I said slowly, trying to figure out how that made sense.

"I'm happy figuring out who I am outside of the palace, away from the spotlights and cameras and makeup. I am finally doing what I've always wanted to do in life. I'm doing something meaningful and impactful and I'm not doing it at a distance like I thought I would have to. It's been hard, moving across the country with a broken heart and being paid by the person who broke it, but it's been an adventure."

I looked away from him, my bubble of joy deflating a little at that. I knew that banishing him and breaking his heart simultaneously was awful but I never let myself think of how it would impact him. "I'm sorry, Kile."

"I'm not apologizing to you for Eikko marrying you, am I?"

"No."

"Then stop apologizing to me for kicking my ass and reminding me of my dreams and plans." He laughed and faced me. "Honestly Eadlyn, you're the only queen who could give her people what they want while apologizing about it until you're blue in the face." He shook his head. "Sometimes the hard thing is the right thing."

My eyes grew warm as he smiled at me so softly and so wholly with love and I had to break away from his gaze to avoid bursting into tears. "You would have made a great king, anyway."

"Good thing I didn't marry you then. I wouldn't have been wasted as a prince consort." I elbowed him, shoving him away a few feet.

"Are you heading back to Panama then?"

"Yeah, on Monday. I'm spending some time with my mom just to appease some of her worries but I can't waste too much time here. You've heard about the hurricane."

I nodded grimly. "It looks terrible down there. Eikko and I will be down for a visit and to help on our way back here from France. Maybe you can introduce us to your new friends."

"Or I could give you a hammer and put you to work," he teased. "Unless that would endanger your manicure?"

"I'll tell Eloise to remove my nail polish on our way there."

"Good idea." We had ended up at the reception again, thanks to Kile's impeccable navigation skills of the garden. Ahren was standing by the door, craning his head and squinting as he looked for something in the darkness of the gardens. Camille and Eikko were speaking in the doorway behind him. "Ahren is looking for you, I believe."

"He's always looking for me," I said, rolling my eyes and meeting my twin brother by the doors of the reception. Kile slipped inside, shaking Eikko's hand as he went.

Ahren held a fancy key out to me. "For the chateau, madame."

"We really have to unlock the front door?" I asked. Never in my life had I needed a key to a hotel room or guesthouse we stayed in. Security was always in there first and they let us in. There was no way our honeymoon would be any different, especially since Eikko and I were officially the monarchs of Illéa.

"No, General Leger will have that taken care of before you get there, I'm sure. This is for the wine cabinet in the cellar. There's wine in there more expensive than your tiaras combined," Ahren clarified.

"And you're giving _us_ the key?"

"Think of it was a wedding gift from us to you," Camille said, hugging Ahren from the side and smiling to me. "Really, do take it."

I frowned. "And drink expensive wine that doesn't even belong to us during our honeymoon?"

"Do you know anything about being on a honeymoon?" Ahren asked. "No, you don't. We do. Take the key, drink, enjoy. Just don't have too much fun. You should settle in as husband and wife before having kids."

I blushed, my eyes flickering to meet Eikko's. I had been waiting all day for Ahren to make a comment along those lines. Eikko came to my rescue by asking, "Speaking from personal experience, Ahren?"

"No!" he exclaimed, bordering on squeaking. "No, I'm just telling you what Mom and Dad would."

"What would we tell you?" Dad said, him and Mom stepping up behind Eikko.

"Just to stay safe while you're abroad," Ahren amended.

Dad squinted at Ahren. "Yes, of course that's what you all were talking about," he said. He looked between Eikko and I. "In all seriousness, though, please stay safe. General Leger handpicked the guards going with you but with all that's going on with North Africa and those rebels, I don't like how far away you'll be from here."

"If anything happens, France's sanctuaries and safe houses will be open to them," Camille assured him. "We want them to be safe as well and will do all we can to help."

"Okay," I sighed. "If you all are done talking about us like we're children going away to summer camp for the first time, we'll be leaving for our honeymoon. Actually, we're going no matter what."

Mom pouted and reached her arms out to me, officially starting the goodbyes. "Be good, don't get into too much trouble," she whispered in my ear. "And enjoy yourselves. You'll never get this time again."

"Thanks Mom." I walked into Dad's embrace, swaying slightly with him. "I love you, Daddy."

"I love you too," he said. He kissed my forehead and then gently nudged me toward Eikko. "She's all yours. Get her back in one piece please, and don't let her hassle you too much. Sometimes she needs to be told what to do."

I rolled my eyes. "God, can we please be going?"

Eikko took my hand and walked me toward my room where we would change into more comfy clothes to travel in. I glanced over my shoulder one last time to see Ahren shout, "Make sure you use protection!" and Mom swat him on the back of his head.


	12. Chapter 12

Three days before the wedding, Mom saw the perfect opportunity in what would hopefully be my final dress fitting to corner me and have The Wife Talk. I'd suffered through to awkward talks with my mom in my life. One was the Your Changing Body talk, the second was the usual Birds and the Bees. No one ever mentions that a woman typically gets a third talk. The talk about being a good wife and meeting your husbands 'needs'.

"I know you two have figured things out and are already sexually active," she had said, both us wincing. I had blushed and tried to pretend that Hale wasn't making the tiniest last-minute adjustments to my dress. "Just, please use your honeymoon wisely. You'll have your whole lives to ravage each other. Don't spend the three days you have in France away from work in bed. Go out, have fun, drink wine, and just be a normal married couple."

"Normal married couples don't honeymoon in a private chateau personally lent to them by the future queen of France," I had reminded her.

"Well even kings and queens have limits to their energy. Try to spend all three days in bed, I dare you, and you'll be exhausted by the first night."

I always hated admitting it when my mother was right but she was right. By the second morning of waking up in France, I was exhausted (and sore). "What do prince consorts do with their queens on their honeymoon?" Eikko asked, biting into a piece of toast as we ate breakfast on the balcony of the master suite.

I considered, looking out over the sea. If I kept my chin lifted enough I just barely lost sight of the guards patrolling the perimeter of the grounds below us. "Going out in public is probably out of the question," I said, crossing my arms. "And my parents were pretty serious about being careful to not have pictures of us taken while on our honeymoon. Plus it would mean dressing up."

"What's so wrong with what we're wearing now? I am rather fond of your outfit." He smirked, his eyes slowly lowering to where my silk robe (the only thing I was wearing) was opened low over my breastbone, exposing a bit of cleavage.

"When in Rome," I joked.

"Eadlyn, c'mon, this is France. Did you miss your geography lessons growing up?" I rolled my eyes at his bad joke. "In all seriousness, what are we going to do? I refuse to spend our honeymoon playing chess."

"We could play hide-and-go-seek," I proposed, fiddling with the tie of my robe thoughtfully.

It was Eikko's turn to roll his eyes. "Eadlyn."

"When Ahren and I were younger, we would play our own version of hide-and-go-seek. The version where we hide and the guards seek."

"So you mean sneak away?" I nodded slowly, a mischievous smile creeping across my face. His eyes met it, sparking with excitement. "And where would we sneak away to?" I shrugged, like it was the universe's answer. "Let's do it."

We sprung up from the table and dashed inside our room. He threw on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and I dressed quickly in a bikini and cover-up. I told Eikko to find a bottle of wine and some snacks while I went to the sports room in search of a backpack. I found one and took it up to the kitchen where Eikko had a bottle and some hunks of bread and cheese waiting. He slipped it in and looked to me, waiting for me to move. "How should we make our getaway?" he asked breathlessly.

"Do you know how to drive?" I asked him.

"Of course."

He followed me down to the basement of the chateau and through the heavy door that took us into a room of sticky sea air. We could hear water chopping close by our feet but I couldn't see much in the darkness. "Where are we?" he whispered.

I felt along the wall and found a hook with a key on it. Taking Eikko's hand in mine, I guided it further up on the wall to a switch. "When I tell you, flip that switch."

"Why are we in the dark?" he asked as I let go of his hand and felt for the hard, grainy surface I was looking for.

"Because this is a getaway and being sneaky is key to its success." My hand found the edge of the boat and I quickly climbed on, my eyes finally adjusting to the darkness. I climbed the small ladder to the top of the boat where the steering wheel was and where I assumed the ignition was located. "Okay, ready?"

"Sure."

"Flip the switch and come meet me up here. We'll probably have thirty seconds between you hitting that switch and guards finding us."

"Got it."

I positioned the key at the mouth for it and shouted, "Go!"

The door behind the boat rumbled and slowly slid upward. As light started to flood in, Eikko sprinted onto the boat and climbed up to meet me.

"A boat? We're stealing a boat?"

"We're not stealing it," I said, starting the engine. "You said you know how to drive?"

"Cars! You know, those things with wheels that you drive around on _land_?"

"This is essentially the same thing. It's already in reverse. All you need to do is back out. And trust me, there's far less chance of you hitting something in the open water than on a road."

"How do you know it's in reverse? How do we even move?" His voice was rising with panic and I could see his hands start to shake. He gripped the steering wheel, waiting for me to tell him what to do next. I didn't know what to do though. All I wanted was for us to have a little bit of fun and suddenly Eikko was on the verge of an anxiety attack and we were about to be found by the guards before we could even really run.

I turned the boat off and my shoulders slumped in defeat. "We'll just have a picnic by the pool," I told him, withdrawing the key from the ignition.

"Are you sure?" We pretended not to hear the relief in his voice.

"Yeah. It'll be great."

I pressed the button on our way out of the room to lower the garage door again and pulled the door shut tight behind us. I held Eikko's hand as we walked back up to the back deck and pool patio. He stopped along the way to get two wine glasses and I got to work with spreading blankets out on the pavement for us to sit on.

There was a crash from within the house and my head snapped up to try to peer inside the glass doors. "Eikko?" I called. There was another crash and I bolted straight for the door, pulling it open and coming face to face with a guard. Without any word of explanation, he grabbed me and started pulling me to the side door that led to the car garage, past the spot in the kitchen where two wine glasses lay shattered on the floor. "What's going on?" I demanded.

"We'll explain when we're on the way, Your Majesty," he said vaguely.

Eikko was in the driveway with some other guards that I knew from being members of my personal security detail for years, one of them climbing into a helicopter behind Eikko. The guard that had been holding me let go and pushed me into the helicopter, blades spinning above us.

"Eadlyn, what's happening?" Eikko asked me in a terrified whisper.

"Officer State, where are we going? Why the helicopter?" I asked, fastening the seat belt over my lap.

"We're on direct orders from General Leger to get you to the royal safe house in Monaco," he told us, handing us two headsets.

The helicopter lifted off suddenly, making my stomach swoop. I folded my legs so that my knees were just barely touching Eikko's and our hands connected between us. "You're extracting us," I realized, watching the chateau disappear beneath us as we flew higher.

"Extracting us? What? What does that mean?"

"They're moving us to a secure location because something has happened. It only happens when we're directly threatened and we are not in the palace. But…what about my parents?"

"They're, well…they are not being extracted."

I frowned. "Why not?"

"Actually, ma'am, it's not your family that's been threatened."

A cold hand wrapped around my stomach as everything clicked into place. The urgency to get us back to Monaco, the reason my parents weren't sitting in a safe room at that very moment… "Ahren."

"He is safe, ma'am. As is Princess Camille."

"Then what is going on?"

"Queen Daphne's plane was attacked upon landing in Saudi. Those are the early reports. We know nothing about the queen's current status; communication has been cut from them."

Eikko reached over and placed his hand on my thigh, squeezing it tightly. There was nothing else to discuss, nothing else to do but worry and wait to arrive in Monaco. Halfway through our flight, I realized that we were flanked by two other helicopters and there was very little doubt in my mind that both helicopters had enough ammo on them to supply a small country for a war.

We touched down on the roof of the palace in Monaco and Illéan and French guards immediately swarmed around us, holding their arms and hands and even a couple riot shields above my and Eikko's heads as we went inside. There was very little time to waste once we were inside. The French guards gave orders to the Illéan guards as we descended a steep and dark set of steps that seemed to be built into the palace as a last-minute thought.

The tunnels underneath the palace seemed to go on forever. Halfway through the tunnel, a guard put a satellite phone in my hand. "King Maxon," he told me as he passed it to me.

"Dad?" I answered, slightly breathless from half-running for what felt like miles.

"Eadlyn, thank goodness. Your mother and I were thinking we'd have to bribe General Leger to let us get a hold of you. You both are safe?" Dad asked.

"We're getting there," I told him.

"Good," he breathed out, clearly relieved.

I paused and looked at the guards around me, deciding that I had nothing to hide from them. "Daddy, are you okay?" I asked him. He and Daphne had always had a unique relationship. Mom told me that Daphne expressed interest in him way back before the Selection and before he even knew Mom existed. Somehow they had reconciled and were back to being good friends. They had only gotten closer as friends since Ahren and Camille started dating.

It was a moment before he answered. "Don't worry about me love. Give your brother a hug for me." I hung up, seeing that this was the end of the conversation.

We finally made it to a heavy metal door that slid open without any obvious indication from any of the guards. Within seconds we were inside the safe room and the door was sliding shut behind us, Officer State the only member of Illéa's guard in the safe room with us.

Camille was in Ahren's lap on a small couch while King Regis paced the length of the room. "Eadlyn," my twin said, his eyes landing on us first.

My sister-in-law sniffed and looked up at me with watery eyes. "You made it," she said in a tearful voice. She moved away from Ahren and dashed to me, hugging me close. "Have they told you anything about my mother?"

"No, nothing. I know nothing. I'm so sorry," I told her, squeezing her shoulders.

"I'm sorry your honeymoon got cut short," she said, wiping her eyes. " _Merde_ , I'm the queen…I mean, the future queen. I should be acting more proper than this."

"Your mother's life is in danger – you don't have to be acting like anything other than her daughter," I reminded her, thinking back to when my mother was lying in a hospital bed just a few months before. I would have started wars if it meant saving her. Power in the hands of grief was never a good thing.

Ahren hugged me then, not saying anything. It was impossibly comforting to have my twin brother hugging me. "Why would they do this, Eads? Is this what becomes of us? Is this how we all die? How could anyone do this to _Daphne_?" I could feel his confusion in the way his whole body was tensed. He had spent all night comforting Daphne and lending her his heart to make up for her broken one, but he needed the comfort too.

"I don't know, Ahren. I wish I knew how to explain this or find some rationale in all of this," I told him. "But we'll be okay. At the end of the day, today, we'll still have each other."

He squeezed me extra tight for another moment and then released me. Within seconds, Camille was back in his arms. As the initial frenzy of arriving in the safe room passed, I was able to look around a bit. Their safe room was cozier than ours in Illéa. Ours was never really meant to house us for more than a night or two. This one was obviously meant to double as a bunker and a permanent safe haven if the occasion ever arose. There were alcoves off of the main room we were in, each one with a bed inside. There was a table and chairs in one corner and sofas in the other. A bookshelf lined with classic novels sat against one of the walls. A television sat in front of the largest sofa.

I shivered slightly, realizing that I was still in my bikini and cover-up. It felt like years had passed since our attempted escapade on the boat. I brushed my hands up and down my arms, trying to warm myself up a bit. Eikko's hands replaced mine and his lips brushed against my hair.

Camille seemed to notice my discomfort and welcomed the distraction. "I have clothes stowed away down here. We can probably find something that fits you. Ahren has some too. He and Eikko look to be a similar size."

Eikko was a bit taller than Ahren but anything would be better than his swim shorts and t-shirt. Camille had some printed linen pants and a sweater that she thought would fit me. Her figure was much more petite than mine but both articles of clothing were loose enough on her that I could squeeze into them. It was weird to see Eikko in a shirt that I was used to seeing my brother wear around the palace on Sunday afternoons when he and Dad would watch football games together but he still looked good, nonetheless.

I sat cross-legged across from him on the bed we had chosen to use for our night in the safe room, both of us seeing that we probably weren't getting let out any time soon. We weren't interested in sleeping – we probably wouldn't be able to sleep – but it still was nice to have some semblance of privacy.

"I'm sorry this happened," I whispered so that no one else but Eikko would hear.

Our fingers were weaving together between us playfully. "Me too. But this is our world. Things like this happen in our world."

"I just wanted you to have a normal honeymoon."

"Why?" he asked as if that was a preposterous thing for me to say.

"Because nothing else we do is normal. Our wedding was an affair watched by millions of people and was immediately followed with you becoming my prince consort. Any date we go on will no doubt have some sort of political motivation behind it. And our kids? The press will be ferocious with us when we start a family—"

"Okay, stop," he said, a bit louder than the level we had both been speaking at before. Through the doorway, I saw Camille's head lift up slightly. "I don't care about any of that. Is it a nuisance? Somewhat. But I knew what I was signing on to when I agreed to be your husband. I didn't marry you because I wanted to be in the spotlight, I married you because I love you. I chose to be your husband because I want to be by your side through everything and find the new normal in everything we do. I don't know how many times I can say that I love you before you get it that I love _you_ , not Queen Eadlyn."

My face fell and I had to turn my eyes away from him. I could look into his eyes forever but not with this feeling of shame enveloping me. "Sometimes I can't really tell them apart."

"Because you are the same people. What makes you a great queen comes from being a wonderful woman and vice versa. Queen Eadlyn is just a part of Eadlyn. I've already told you that no matter what, you are infinitely more meaningful to me than anyone else on this planet."

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely." I crawled to his side and lay down so that my head was pillowed by his knee. He immediately started running his hand through my hair, gently trying to untangle it. "So, this extraction business. You seem to know a little bit about it."

I shrugged. "It's only been done for my family once before. When I was eight, Dad got into an argument with the Russian tzar and it apparently escalated to the point that he was threatening nuclear war. Of course, it was all empty threats. All the nations terminated their nuclear programs after the Fourth World War but we had no way of knowing for sure. My whole family was moved to a secure location somewhere in the extreme northern parts of Baffin."

"That must have been scary."

"It was," I confirmed. I thought about that night, being torn from my bed by General Leger himself, whose sole job that night seemed to be securing me. Forget Dad, forget my pregnant mother, forget my other siblings. It was all about me. That was the scariest part. Rushing off to some unfamiliar part of the country was bearable since I was surrounded by my family. It was the fact that everyone was giving me the extra protection, not my parents."

"Wasn't it that way all the time?" he asked, still threading his fingers through my hair. I could feel my eyelids starting to get heavy but I didn't want to waste a single second with him. Maybe we were being rude by not talking to my brother or sister-in-law but this was supposed to be our honeymoon.

"It wasn't so obvious as it was that night. I've always had the equal amount of protection as my parents, if not more. But that night, it was abundantly clear that if everyone died and only one of us survived, it was going to be me that made it." I shook my head to help clear it of the dread threatening to take over. "It's something that I've grown accustomed to but that doesn't mean that I'm okay with it. If my whole family did die and I was all that was left, I don't know how I'd survive."

Eikko seemed to sense my mood getting darker because next he said, "Lucky for you that I'm immortal and will never die." The tension broke then and I playfully slapped the forearm above my face.

"Camille could become queen in the next few hours," I whispered, watching her and Ahren. She wasn't crying anymore but she looked stunned, terrified, like she had been slapped in the face by life. "Right here in this very room, she could become queen."

"At least she's not alone," Eikko said, following my gaze to where Ahren was trying to persuade her to eat something.

I shook my head. "Becoming queen will be the least of her problems. If she becomes queen, it's because her mother can no longer rule."

"What about Regis?" We turned our heads to see where Regis was sitting alone on a sofa, staring at the wall in front of him.

"Camille is of age. Regis would only be the regent if she weren't older than eighteen. I can't fathom becoming queen from something violent."

"What would you do if you were in her position?"

I thought about my parents, how my dad did the very thing Camille was facing. He became king after his parents were suddenly killed by rebels, pulling Mom up with him before she could even be a princess. How they didn't crack and crumble under the pressure was beyond me. Mom said they fought a lot during her Selection. Maybe it was because of his rapid-fire ascension the necessity for them to be a team that made them stop fighting so much. "I don't know what I would do," I told him honestly. I shivered just thinking about it.

The door to the safe room swung open suddenly and we raced into the living area to see who it was. Judging by the badges on his uniform, it was one of the more elite members of the French guard. Camille asked him something quickly in French. I didn't understand his response but his voice was low and sorrowful. Regis still hadn't moved from his place on the sofa.

"There has to be something you can do," Ahren told the guard. "She shouldn't be locked up in some prison somewhere. She's the queen of France!"

"No, she's not," Regis said quietly.

We all looked at him, waiting for him to continue. Slowly, as if the night had aged him well beyond his years, he stood and faced Camille. "You are, _ma cherie_. We all know that your mother is not surviving this night."

" _Père_ …" Camille sobbed, putting a hand over her mouth.

"I am the prince consort," Regis said, his voice firm as he addressed the guard. "My queen is not fit for rule. You have her location, yes? _Envoyer nos forces aériennes. Détruire tout le monde à cet endroit et s'assurer qu'il n'y a aucun survivant._ "

Ahren and Camille both gasped. "Monsieur de Sauveterre, you can't."

"My queen deserves more than a slow, torturous death at the hand of rebels. Make it swift. She will forgive me."

"But you can't rescue her?" I suddenly interjected, realizing what they were talking about doing. It had been done before, kings killing their queens when they were being held hostage and there was no help of rescue. Presidents letting sending missiles in to kill spies that knew too much and were in the hands of the enemy. It made extraction plans look like child's play. I had missed whatever they were saying in French though; I didn't know how dire the situation was.

"It would take hours to coordinate that and we don't have the time," Ahren told me. It was easy to forget that France didn't have the military that Illéa had. They didn't fight in wars. They made a good ally but never would dare to start a war themselves. I knew that it was something Ahren hoped to improve as prince consort.

Regis nodded and looked at his guard. "If she's going to die, I want her to die for the sake of destroying just a few of these rebels. Not at the hands of the enemy."

" _Très bien_ , Your Highness," the guard said, bowing his head. He didn't argue. He just accepted his orders and went off to kill the queen.

Part of me wanted to think that this was some sort of conspiracy to kill Queen Daphne but there was no faking the anguish Regis was trying to hide. He had married Daphne because her parents thought that he would make an excellent prince consort. A convenient arrangement eventually grew to a loving bond, according to my father. He always said that it was nearly impossible to share your life with someone and not love them. That was Dad though. He always chose to believe that everyone had some sort of love in them.

Camille turned on Regis. " _Comment est-ce que vous pourriez faire cela? Ta femme, la mère de votre enfant… vous aime pas elle du tout?"_

Ahren wrapped his hands around her upper arms, trying to hold her back. "Cam, love, c'mon. You don't want to do this."

"She's your _wife_ ," Camille growled at Regis, fighting against Ahren to get free. I didn't know what she would do if she got free. I wasn't sure if she knew either.

"I know she's my wife!" Regis exploded. "And I don't want her to suffer. These rebels have captured her and are torturing her right now as we speak. _Ils ne vont pas sortir une reine._ " He lowered his voice and shook his head. " _Ils ne veulent pas de notre argent_ , _ma cherie_. This is what _Mère_ would do."

"I can't believe that," she said through her teeth. Regis stepped away from her and sat down on the sofa. "If you do this, I will never be able to look at you the same way again. There will be no forgiveness for you, no reconciliation between us. You do this, you lose both of us."

Regis grimaced. "I'm going to lose her either way—"

"So don't give up on me!" Camille pleaded.

"You're about to become queen, _ma cherie_. I will lose you then too."

Her face crumbled and she collapsed, pulling Ahren down to the floor with her. He stayed with her and didn't try to move her as she cried, clutching both of his arms to her. I wanted to turn away and leave to give them space, feeling like I was intruding on a wildly intimate moment in a family, but there was nowhere for me to run.

The door opened again and the same guard stepped through, his face pale. He was holding an electronic tablet in his hands tightly. "Your Highness, we have something for you," he said in a measured voice. "A video transmission. We believe it is the rebels, calling for you."

Regis sprung off the sofa and grabbed the tablet, accepting the video call. "Daphne?" he demanded as soon as the call went through. The guard carefully maneuvered Regis so that he was standing in a spot where his background wouldn't give away where we were.

"Prince Regis," a male voice purred from the other side of the call, though his voice was garbled and distorted. Obviously to keep his identity hidden. "By now you know we have your queen."

"What do you want?" Regis asked desperately. I cringed. My advisers would probably never let me speak face-to-face to a terrorist like this, let alone seem so willing while talking to them.

"Why don't we let your wife tell you?" the voice asked.

The camera view must have shifted because Regis gasped and ran his fingers down the screen. "Daphne, _mon trésor_. _Que dois-je faire? me dire quoi faire._ Are they asking for money? I will give money."

"Regis, listen to me." It was Daphne's voice but it sounded hoarse. I swallowed and willed myself to not imagine why it would sound like that. Eikko's hand ghosted over my back, trying to comfort me in any way he could but there was no safety in this night. "Regis, Camille will be queen, okay? And Maxon, you must tell him that the grass is greener." She was speaking quickly, trying to get it all out.

"No coded messages!" the voice shouted, making all of us jump.

Daphne sobbed quietly, making it sound more like a hiccup. "Camille, _ma cherie_ , I love you. And Regis, you are my treasure. Please, do what you need to." She whimpered and the transmission cut out abruptly.

Camille made a dive for the tablet and Regis relinquished it. She tapped furiously at the screen but the call wasn't coming back. "Mom!" she was screaming over and over, crying over the tablet.

Ahren stood stock-still, his mind still reeling from the call. His eyes met Eikko's and my husband asked, "What now?"

"We wait," Ahren said in defeat, finally going to Camille and attempting to coax the tablet from her fingers.

Eikko and I went back to our bed but we still didn't sleep. I lay with my head on his stomach, both of us staring up at the ceiling. I made pictures in my mind with the tiny dots from the textured pattern of the concrete ceiling above our heads. Regis went back to pacing across the room and Eikko counted under his breath how many laps he did.

On lap seventeen, Camille and Ahren finally got up off the floor and relocated to a large leather chair. On lap fifty-one, I whispered to Eikko that I was hungry and he agreed. On lap one hundred eleven, I asked him what he thought the weather was like outside. Finally, just after his two hundredth lap, the guard came back inside.

His face was even paler than before and he was hunched over in despair. "Yes, soldier?" Regis asked, ceasing his pacing.

We all stood and waited for the news we all knew was coming. The guard drew himself up to his full height and reported, "At sixteen-hundred hours, Her Royal Majesty Queen Daphne of France was assassinated by the North African rebels."

Regis howled and fell to his knees.


	13. Chapter 13

Dad arrived two days later with Osten in tow. It wasn't unusual for Mom and Dad to take one of the boys with them but Kaden was normally Dad's travel buddy. I was ecstatic to see my youngest brother nonetheless, despite the circumstances surrounding their visit to France.

"Where's Mom?" I asked Dad as we walked toward the room where he would be staying. Eikko and I had stepped in to organize who would be staying where as the palace would soon be flooded with foreign guests and Camille was still grieving.

"Dr. Cleary didn't want her traveling with the current state of her heart. I didn't want her to leave alone though and I definitely didn't want to leave her alone with Osten to handle so Kaden stayed behind. He was happy to keep an eye on her," Dad explained. The sadness in his voice made it obvious how much he missed Mom. "How are Ahren and Camille?"

"Camille has barely left her room for the past two days. Ahren is doing what he can to help her but what can you say to someone who lost their mother like this?" I asked him, yawning widely. He didn't respond and I realized too late that I had struck a chord. "Sorry."

He waved a hand at me. "Don't apologize to me, love. It's been over twenty years since it happened. I guess this is just bringing back a lot of old memories."

"We've been helping Camille in whatever ways we can, so we're pretty much planning the funeral. She at least has a meeting with her advisers today about what to do next. She kept pushing it off until Ahren told her this morning that she couldn't wait anymore to be queen."

"It's a harsh transition to make when you have to make it so quickly. There's very little time for mourning," he said. "But it's good that she has your brother. If I had to go through all that I did without your mother…" He peered at me as I yawned yet again. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm just exhausted. Probably just jetlag and all of this extra work we've been doing."

"What does this mean for your trip to Panama?"

"We're flying in two days. It will have to just be a day visit now but I hope everyone understands that I need to be here right now."

"Sure, just don't forget which country is your country."

I sighed. "Yes, Dad, I know."

"Eadlyn!" Osten called as he ran to catch up with us. "Where's Eikko?"

"Downstairs." I narrowed my eyes at him. "Why?"

"No reason!" And then he was off again, running toward the steps like he had lived in this palace his whole life. Dad and I both shook our heads at him.

After letting Dad settle into his room, I walked with him down to the first floor of the palace where Eikko and Ahren were in a parlor seeing to the last bit of funeral details. "No, daffodils mean death or something," Eikko said, a pamphlet open in front of him. When the doors opened and Ahren and I walked in, he breathed out a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness, Eadlyn, what kind of flowers should we get?"

"Roses are a safe choice," I said. "White roses are rather elegant and I'm sure they would look lovely." I honestly couldn't care less about flowers. I fell into one of the sofas face-first as Ahren looked threw another bulletin.

"No, white roses represent vanity. This is impossible! There has to be some kind of flower that represents eternal life or something and won't send the wrong message at a funeral," Ahren exclaimed.

Dad was staring out the window, facing away from us, as he said, "Yellow roses."

"Yellow roses," Ahren repeated as he turned the pages of his bulletin. "Hm, jealousy, infidelity, extreme betrayal—"

"Friendship," Dad added, still not looking at any of us. "Friendship, a broken heart, extreme emotion. That's what yellow roses represent. They were her favorite flowers." His voice was distant, as if he was only have with us and the other half of him was in the past.

The three of us quietly assessed each other before Eikko nodded. "Yellow roses, got it. I'll make the call." He stepped away to the other side of the room, dialing the number for the royal florist.

"Where's Camille?" I asked Ahren, surprised to see him out and about without her nearby.

"In a meeting with her advisers. They're helping her prepare her statement for later."

"Her statement?"

Ahren grimaced. "She's expected to address what's happened, Eads. She's the queen now, the people really should have heard from her yesterday. We've put it off for as long as possible but its time she accepts her duties. At least, according to the advisers it is. I would fight for her to have years before her ascension if I could."

I shook my head. "I still can't believe Daphne is gone."

"It just seems so impossible. Why target you guys? Why target France?"

"Everyone always wants France to be in a war. We just don't have the military for it. And I'm not compromising the free health care our citizens get just for upgrading our military," Ahren said decisively. Just like Dad, he had always sought peace in the world and hated wars. It wasn't that I loved wars or was a sadist – I just saw the necessity in having to stand up for your country when it was threatened. My job was to keep my citizens safe. If the North African rebels threatened them, I would go to war for the cause.

"But does Camille feel the same way?" I asked him, chewing on my lip. I stood and started pacing. If I laid on the couch much longer, I would surely fall asleep.

"Yes, but we both know that our advisers will try their damnedest to talk her into a war with the rebels. But how do you fight an enemy that's not even really there? They're not on our land, they're not a nation we can invade; how do we win?" Without realizing it, we both looked to Dad, the only other person in the room with experience in fighting an invisible enemy.

He must have known that we were waiting for him to say something. "As hard as it is, you have to let them come to you. You let them come to you and then you attack them head on, on your own turf. Targeting them abroad will only drain your resources."

"Of course, it's all hypothetical," I cut in. "You're not starting a war with rebels."

"Of course," Ahren agreed.

Eikko stepped back toward us, phone sliding into his back pocket. "Roses are ordered. All we have left is making sure it all comes together this afternoon."

The door slammed open and Osten ran in, his red curls bouncing wildly. He walked right up to Eikko and tugged on his sleeve. "So you're my brother now, right?" he asked him.

"Yes," Eikko said, sounding like he wasn't sure that was the right answer.

"You should help me with my plan."

My mouth fell open and I saw the same shock on Ahren's face. We hardly ever were asked to help Osten with his plans. How did Eikko get so lucky? Smiling wickedly, he nodded and followed Osten from the room. It was at least comforting to know that Eikko wouldn't let him do anything too outrageous.

Camille brushed past them, her eyes red from fresh tears. Ahren immediately engulfed her in a hug. "Are you ready for your statement?" he asked her, playing with her fingers.

"I…yes. I want to do it on my own, though."

Ahren drew back slightly. "Oh. Okay."

"This is something I need to do myself."

"Okay. Yeah, do it then. Can I at least come with you while you get ready?" Anyone that wasn't deaf could hear the hurt in his voice that he tried so hard to smother. Camille nodded timidly and tucked her hair behind her ear, walking out with him.

"And then it was two," I sighed. Dad sat down across from me. I checked my watch and calculated how long I had before I needed to go get ready for the funeral and if I had the time for a power nap. "Dad, are you okay?" I asked him. "I know that you and Daphne were friends…"

"You know, she was the first woman to express any attraction toward me," he said, smirking slightly. "Desperately, she told me that she had a crush on me. If it weren't for the fact that my Selection was starting soon after, she probably would have never told me. I think it was her last chance to make a grab for me."

I frowned. "But you two could have never married. Not when you both were heirs."

Dad waved a hand at me. "Don't you know by now that technicalities have very little meaning in my life?" He sighed and ran a hand through his messy hair. "She would have been a good wife, though. Obviously not even close to what your mother is but Daphne was loyal to a fault and not afraid to speak her mind. That's why she was such a good queen."

I lay down sideways on the sofa, hugging a pillow under my head. I could steal ten minutes or so of sleep and be refreshed for the afternoon. "Camille has a lot to live up to," I mused, thinking of the dozens of initiatives her mother had started and continued to fund over the last twenty years.

"No more than you do," Dad reminded me. "She just needs to understand how to make her own mark in her reign. Speaking of…I wasn't planning on telling you this since you weren't home but I guess we're back to work now so you should know – Goldsworth has spoken to the press."

I groaned. "I knew he wouldn't be a quiet one."

"Said that you used the exact same power you're trying to get rid of to fire him. He's essentially calling you a hypocrite, and those who don't support the changes in the government are following his lead. They've found a voice in him."

"So I'm going home to deal with my own brand of rebels?"

"Pretty much."

"Great. Can't wait."

Dad walked over to the bookshelf and took a book down, settling into an armchair to read it. "You don't need help with anything today, do you?" he asked with the book poised in his lap.

"Nope. Enjoy the book." I stretched and walked out, feeling Dad's eyes on my back the whole way. When I turned to look over my head, he was staring at me suspiciously. I made my way upstairs to the room Eikko and I were sharing and where Eloise was waiting. She was only supposed to meet us in Panama but with this change in plans, we had to bring her hair with a wardrobe fitting for working in a palace and a dress suitable for a funeral.

I remembered dreading the possibility of having to ask Eloise to make me a funeral dress just days into her time as my maid, back while Mom was in the hospital after her heart attack. Selfishly, I was grateful that it wasn't my mother's funeral that I needed this dress for.

It was cruel, really, making Camille do a press conference before burying her mother. In the scope of things, she was better off doing it before but it still made the day even longer for her than it needed to be. Ahren stayed with her up until the last second before joining the rest of us, looking like he was fighting his own war against grief and slowly losing. He must have seen the questions in my eyes because he simply shook his head and dabbed at his eyes for a moment.

Ahren, Dad, Eikko, and I stood in a family parlor room as Camille delivered her speech in the gardens with Regis standing proudly behind her. Since this was an international broadcast, she would be delivering her speech in English. It didn't take long for word to spread that Daphne had been killed, despite the fact that the French authorities tried to keep it under the radar until they knew more. Within hours, Europe and the greater portion of Western civilization were mourning the lost French queen.

"My people," Camille began, her voice wavering slightly, "I stand before you today under the most distressing of circumstances." She stopped to breathe deeply and we all held our breath to see if she would burst into tears. _Keep it together, Camille, you can do this_ , I begged her. "As you all know by now, our queen is now gone and I will be taking her place on the throne. I beg you all for patience and forgiveness in this time of crisis and going forward into a time of adjustment. We have lost a queen who was gracious, kind, supportive, and who loved her people. It is my hope that I can be half the queen to you as she was. We didn't just lose a queen in this attack. We lost a mother, a wife, a loyal friend, and a courageous heart. We will never forget this attack made against our monarchy and moving forward, it will not go unanswered."

"Oh no," Ahren said as all of our hearts sank.

Camille forged on, her voice stronger than it had been yet. "These sins will not be forgotten, nor will they be unanswered. As of this moment, we are officially at war with North Africa."

"She didn't just do that," Eikko said in a shocked voice.

"She did," I confirmed. "She actually listened to her advisers."

" _Merde_ ," Ahren groaned, stepping away from the television and pacing to the other side of the room. "I knew I should have gone to that meeting with her."

Eikko frowned. "But it wasn't North Africa that did this. It was the rebels from North Africa."

"Yes, but you can't declare war against a band of rebels. So you declare it against the country but North Africa is an ally to Italy, Illéa, Swendway…" I stopped listing all of their allies, realizing how serious this declaration of war actually was. Forget the fact that France didn't have the military or money for war, forget that Camille was declaring war on the wrong people. She was declaring war on a country that was allied with all of France's allies.

We were quiet, watching the destruction of the world begin, when Osten asked innocently, "So what's going on?"

Dad was the only one who could answer, both of his hands tight on Osten's shoulders. "I think, the fifth world war has officially begun."

It was somewhat anticlimactic to go from watching Camille declare war on an international broadcast to a funeral. It seemed poetic in a way, as we all knew now that this funeral wasn't going to be the last for the French. What Camille had done, declaring war on North Africa, decided her entire reign. She wasn't going to have the same reign as Daphne at all, not even close. Her reign was going to be dictated by war, by reports of soldiers lost and civilians caught in between.

My mind was reeling. As soon as the broadcast ended, Eikko and I escaped the parlor and walked to the chapel on the palace grounds to discuss our plans. We stood on the stone patio behind it, looking out over the glistening blue sea. "We cannot discuss this war with anyone," I emphasized to him. "Anything we say can be quoted and used against us to rope us into helping."

"And we can't help?" Eikko asked, just to check. "Your brother is going head-long into this, Eadlyn. We can't just sit back."

"We'll have to. We must remain neutral in all of this. France is an ally because I can't lose my brother but we can't lose North Africa as an ally. Imagine the impact on our economy if they cut off our trade deals. The tariffs we have for the trade, the materials and goods we get like medicines and metal supplies…we would go down faster than the Titanic. We _cannot_ get involved with this."

"And you're really willing to choose trade deals over your twin brother?"

I groaned. "Of course not, but I have to. Ahren has his own country to worry about. If it were Illéa in this position, he would do the same." At least, I kept telling myself that.

As it were, I couldn't even look my twin brother in the eye. I sat in the row beside him at the funeral, Eikko between Dad and me. I marveled at the royals and dignitaries surrounding us, my heart breaking at the thought that not even a week ago, we were all together at my wedding. Now we were mourning the loss of one of our own.

I never felt more royal than I did at a funeral for a king or queen or some kind of royalty. It was in those times that we all felt like a family. Disagreements over trading was forgotten, previous wars were overlooked, and personal vendettas were put aside as we all joined together to mourn one of the few other people who knew what it was like to be us. We were our own kind of club.

During the reception following the service, I heard whispers about Camille's speech. Obviously no one was saying anything directly to her. She was virtually untouchable with the way she spent the afternoon huddled against Ahren's side. It was an ingenious move on her part. For someone to try to bring up war with her now, during a reception for a funeral, would be a gross misconduct in decorum.

There was still chatter though. Everyone was nervous and on edge, merely stating that this going to be very bad indeed. We all knew not to say anything committal so nothing went beyond blanket statements of our impending doom.

Even Queen Nicoletta was tense, only made obvious with the way she spent an hour drinking one glass of wine as opposed to her customary three glasses per hour. "You're heading into a difficult time, my young queen," she said to me as we walked around the gardens of the palace, looking for some peace and solitude. "Discernment is most important to you, right now. I will be praying for you and your family." Her voice was somber and I knew that she was deep in thought.

"We all are going to need as many prayers as we can get. The Western Union is about to be torn apart because of this war."

"It's true. Declaring war on another country in the union will definitely make things sticky from here on out." She peered at me from the corner of her eye. "And Illéa won't be getting involved?"

I shook my head. "For as long as possible, we're going to be neutral. It will take extreme measures to get us involved. Nicoletta, we can't afford to be involved. Not with all of this reform now. I'm not sending my country into war with so much up in the air."

"Very wise, indeed, Eadlyn." She stopped to sweep some of my hair over my shoulder. "I'm scared for you and Ahren. This is the type of thing that would separate families in the past."

"Ahren and I are different," I said, trying to convince myself of that more than her. "We'll make it."

"I hope so. The last thing we need is feuding Schreaves." I agreed, but I couldn't help feeling that it was inevitable. My brother was going to war and I was making the decision to stay out of it. There were some things that not even siblings could forgive.

The funeral and reception were brief thankfully. Eikko and I gathered in the sitting room near our bedroom with Dad, Osten, Queen Nicoletta, and Dad's cousin Mickey from Swendway. Eikko had met him when he came to our wedding and I loved watching him get to let loose a bit and speak in Finnish to his new relative. Mickey had brought his five-year-old daughter with him since his wife was very pregnant with their second child and unable to travel or care for their daughter on her own.

She was a firecracker but very ladylike, holding manners to the highest importance. Eikko spent most of the night twirling her around the room, much to her delight. I watched, smiling, having strong visions of our future and what kind of father he would be.

I reached for a coffee mug and my hand had just closed around the pot of coffee to pour when Dad stopped me. "How about decaf?" he suggested.

"Dad, I'm eighteen and married. I think I can decide what kind of coffee to drink."

"You're flying tomorrow and will have a long day since you're traveling west. You'll want to be able to sleep soundly tonight. Drink decaf," he insisted.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine, but only because the decaf tastes better. Don't think it has anything to do with you being logical or right."

"Of course not. Thanks, by the way, for always making sure that I don't get a big head. Between you and your mother, I've managed to stay relatively humble." He poured himself a cup of regular coffee and took a sip, wincing at how hot it was.

"You can drink regular coffee but not me? I'm not the only one flying home tomorrow."

Dad bit his lip. "Actually, I called your mom and spoke to her this afternoon after the speech. She had watched it as well and we both agreed that I should stay and help them in whatever way I can."

"But, doesn't Mom have her surgery next week?"

"It will only be a few days that I'm gone. We just want someone here to help Camille get her head on straight and help her lay out some sort of plan for the next year. Clearly the advisers are monopolizing her and Regis is of little to no help. He never helped his wife, I don't expect him to step in now." Dad noticed the question in my eyes and sighed. "Regis and Daphne loved each other and were good at being married. When it came to being partners, however, Regis was uninvolved. America always said that he was in it for the free booze."

I smiled. "That sounds like something Mom would say."

"Anyway, I'm staying." He held back from saying something, looking sheepish. "Okay, so I wouldn't ask this of you if I didn't think you were capable. And you are, capable, I just don't want to add another burden to your trip to Panama."

"Osten?" I guessed, sighing.

"Osten."

"As long as he behaves himself and doesn't end up falling off a waterfall, we'll take him. He's obviously taken a liking to Eikko these past few months."

"I remember Eikko talking to him quite a bit during the Selection. I think Osten liked that he wasn't one of the Selected and was more of a behind-the-scenes guy." He stared fondly at his son from the other side of the room. "But I'll only be a couple days behind you guys, getting home. Once he's home, pass him off to Kaden and he'll be fine."

I rolled my eyes. "He's ten, Dad. I think he can take care of himself in his own home."

"I can't believe he's ten. Who decided he could be ten?"

"The same people that decided you could be forty."

Dad gave me a sideways glance but the corners of his mouth twitched. "Hey, not yet."

"Yeah, I don't think you'll be able to get out of that birthday," I told him.

"There were a few years where I was happy just to live to make it to another birthday." He put his arm around my shoulders and took a sip of his coffee. "I'm glad to have passed you a kingdom that you didn't need to fear."

I smiled grimly and glanced over to see Ahren and Camille having a serious discussion as they walked into the room, but they didn't seem to be arguing. Ahren put his hands on her shoulders and guided her to the middle of the room where they stopped. Everyone paused and looked at them, wondering what they were doing.

"Camille and myself would just like to say thank you to you all. You took time out of your incredibly busy schedules to help us in our time of need and we are forever indebted to all of you," Ahren said, Camille nodding in agreement to everything.

"Don't even mention it, young ones," Mickey said to them. "You're family to us."

Camille came up to me. Dad gingerly stepped away and busied himself with putting sugar in his coffee, even though I knew that he only put sugar in his coffee if he and Mom were drinking it together. "Eadlyn, I can't thank you enough. You and Eikko were supposed to be on your honeymoon and it was ruined…I just know that we will now emerge from this time as closer friends and fierce allies."

My heart constricted at the word. Maybe it wasn't on purpose but the choice of words was definitely tactful in that it essentially cornered me into helping her with her impending war. I couldn't, though. Not if I didn't have to. "You're my sister, Camille. We are certainly closer friends," I evaded.

She gave me a hard look, a challenging look. She wasn't fooled. A line had just been drawn and we were standing on opposite sides, facing each other. "I see," she said in a tight voice. "Have fun in Panama." She walked back to Ahren's side and shrunk herself into it, making her look even more petite than she was.

The tense silence was interrupted by the ring of Dad's cell phone. He held up a hand to the room in apology. "It's my wife, excuse me." He walked over to the windows, his phone pressed to his ear.

Osten ran over and clung to his arm. "Can I talk to Mom?" he pleaded, pulling on Dad's sleeve.

Eikko came over to hug me, as he had listened closely to my interaction with Camille. "We should get going," he suggested.

"We still have another twenty minutes or so before we're late," I told him, checking my watch.

He blushed and smiled coyly. "Maybe I just want some alone time with my wife."

"Osten is coming with us," I quickly said, realizing that he didn't know.

"Fine, then I can wait until we're on the plane and he is soundly asleep."

"You really think Osten sleeps? He just sits and plots all night," I told him, pulling out of his arms to go say goodbye to Dad. Eikko went about the pleasantries with Mickey and Queen Nicoletta while I interrupted what looked to be a very hushed, very serious conversation between my parents. Osten was pouting off to the side, clearly unhappy with being pushed away and not allowed to listen in.

"Eadlyn," he said in a voice that more announced my name, indicating that whatever they were talking about, it was about me. "Are you leaving?" I nodded and Dad handed me the phone.

"Eadlyn, honey, how are you?" Mom asked me, sounding slightly frantic.

"I'm fine, Mom. Just tired. Exhausted, really. You should relax a bit, stop worrying about me."

She laughed, and I knew she was rolling her eyes. "Yeah, right. Maybe you should cancel the trip to Panama," she suggested just a little too eagerly. I eyed Dad, wondering what they had talked about that had suddenly made her oppose the idea of this trip. "Just come home, get some rest – maybe you'll feel better once you're sleeping in your own bed."

"I'm not sick Mom. I've just been tired and it's probably from all that's been going on these past few days. I promise, I'm fine," I insisted, staring Dad down since he clearly was concerned as well.

"Okay. Please, just remember to make Osten wear sunscreen. He's pale so he'll burn easily. And you know not to drink the tap water there. General Leger is meeting you there at the airport with some more guards. Oh, and don't let Osten eat too many sweets," she said, rattling each item off quickly as she remembered them.

I rolled my eyes. "Okay, okay. Got it."

"He's my baby, Eadlyn," she said as if she was trying to make me understand why she was worried.

"I know. Eikko will take good care of him. Besides, Kile will be there too. The kid will be insulated so well he may as well be wrapped in bubble wrap."

Mom hummed, not fully convinced. "I ought to let you go. Just stay safe, Eadlyn, okay?"

"I'll be fine, Mom," I said for what felt like the millionth time. There was no point in me telling her not to worry though. She'd been worrying about me my whole life, probably before she even knew I existed since she and Dad worked so hard to amend the laws of inheritance before Ahren and I were even microcells. "Do you need to talk to Dad?"

"Yes, please," she said quickly. I handed the phone back and kissed Dad on the cheek quickly before going to see Eikko. He was giving Mickey's daughter one last twirl and then nodded to me that he was ready to go.

Osten was quiet as we rode to the airport in a caravan of six armored vehicles and a small army of men and artillery. Honestly, we only would have been safer in a tank. But I knew that these were dangerous times in Europe and was grateful for the protection we were given. It put me on edge, knowing that there was a recent assassination and then a declaration of war just floating out there, waiting to be responded to.

I shivered, for the first time really thinking about the fact that Daphne had been killed. Killed. Not just assassinated, because assassinated made it sound like it was royal but there was no glory in what had happened to her. A human life had ended, a life that had friends and family and people that cared about her deeply. Daphne may have been a queen and may have been one of us, but she was a person too. It could have been me, or Queen Nicoletta, or even Kile. I squeezed Eikko's hand even tighter.

Once on the plane, Osten claimed a couch and flipped the TV on, perusing through the list of movies we had within seconds. Eikko and I bid him goodnight and went to the master bedroom on the plane. "I'm exhausted," I whined, curling up on top of the covers, still wearing my black dress and heels.

Eikko sat by my feet, placed them in his lap, removed my heels, and started massaging near my toes and arches. "Well, I'm amazed by you."

I peered at him curiously. "Care to elaborate?"

"Eadlyn, your friend's mother gets killed and you're the first to offer to arrange the funeral? Never mind the fact that they have a whole team of people that could have done that for them and in fact, may have already had some of the details written down somewhere that Daphne wanted at her funeral—"

"—I thought it meant more for me to do it myself," I interrupted, but Eikko kept going on.

"And I know that you're terrified of what's going to happen next yet you still try taking care of everyone else first. I am utterly amazed by you."

I shook my head. "You can't keep complimenting me like this. You'll wear yourself out within the year."

"Nope. I could never grow weary of praising you."

I groaned, my stomach swooping at his sappiness. We could hear Osten then, calling for one of us to come help him with something. Eikko patted my feet and stood. "I'll go. You stay right her and wait for me to come back. I'm not done worshiping you." He winked and ducked out of the room, slapping the doorframe casually on his way out.

I sighed and pulled the pillow tighter to my chest, choosing to just stay dressed rather than changing. Clearly I wouldn't be undressing myself that night so there was no sense in my getting ready for bed just yet. My body had other plans though, because the next thing I knew, I was opening my eyes to see Eikko standing over me, shaking my shoulder.

"Did I fall asleep?" I asked, rubbing my eyes.

He smiled and nodded. "Yeah, yeah, you did."

I lifted my head enough to look out the window to see that we were descending through the clouds. I couldn't even remember the plane taking off. "Did I sleep through the whole flight?"

"Yeah, you did. But you needed to, clearly, so I have no problem letting you sleep."

"We're still technically on our honeymoon. Sleeping the night away is the last thing I should be doing."

"If you're tired, you're tired. My queen needs her sleep, especially when we're on our way to Panama for relief work."

I sat up and rubbed my eyes, scrunching my nose up when I found lines of mascara on the backs of my hands. Eikko had somehow managed to remove my dress when he got back and let me sleep in my bra and underwear. I tucked the blanket under my armpits to keep myself warm as Eikko held a folder out to me. "Is that the itinerary?"

"Emailed directly from General Leger, including security details," Eikko confirmed.

I flipped open the folder and was pleased to find a rather short itinerary for our one-day, one-night trip to Panama. It looked like we would be resting up at the royal vacation home – that hadn't been used in over ten years – until morning when we would meet Alice, the CEO of a nonprofit organization that focused on rebuilding homes after natural disasters. I had read about her work ahead of time and it truly was inspiring. She was the youngest CEO in all of Illéa at the age of twenty-two and was surely on her way to being one of the most successful.

Alice would be giving us a tour of one of the areas most devastated by the hurricane and translating for those that still spoke the native language down there, which she happened to be fluent in. There we would have photo opportunities and the chance to actually help in some of the work they're doing to rebuild the community. Then we would head back to the royal home in Panama and call it a night, either sleeping there or flying back to Angeles. At the rate I was going, flying straight back to Angeles sounded like a great idea, just so I could spend the night in my own bed.

Eloise arrived with ten minutes left until we landed to get me dressed. She handed me a pair of jean shorts and a tank top with Alice's nonprofit's logo emblazoned on the front. She braided my hair off to the side and put out socks with work boots. "Going casual today, I see?" I asked her.

"It's hot and you'll be working. Don't worry, it was all approved by the palace press staff," she said, winking at me. "And let's face it, your legs look great in those shorts."

I popped my hip out and struck a ridiculous pose. Eikko laughed when he came in and saw me, also dressed in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. "Someone is obviously feeling refreshed."

We met Osten by the door to the plane and I tried my best to control his unruly red curls. "Did you sleep at all last night?" I asked him, bending down to inspect his hair from straight on. He had circles under his eyes.

"Sure," he said vaguely, still half-asleep.

"Can you at least wake up for the cameras?" I teased.

He rolled his eyes. "I hate cameras."

"Me too," Eikko jumped in. "But it's all part of the job, right?"

The door opened and we waited for the go-ahead to come out. Osten would be going first since he was the prince and decorum said that I should go last for everything, out of respect. The call never came though.

Then General Leger stepped on the plane, looking like he hadn't slept in days and probably wouldn't sleep until we were safely back in Angeles. "Change of plans. No cameras. Just go straight to the royal house," he said shortly. He sighed and held his hand out to the door. "Welcome to Panama."


	14. Chapter 14

Alice had dreadlocks.

The messy, dirty locks of blonde hair were tied back carelessly in a tattered bandana in a fashion that made me wonder if the bandana was purposely shabby or if it was simply because it was knotted too deeply in her hair to ever come out. She looked downright wild in her baggy cutoff jean shorts, crop top and cowgirl boots. Clearly she spent most of her time outdoors because she sported a dark tan that sharply contrasted with her bleached blonde hair and her body was toned with lean muscle, similar to a marathoner's body. I had to elbow Osten numerous times to stop gawking at her.

"This village was one of the most effected by last month's hurricane," Alice explained as we rode in an armored four-by-four vehicle through the mountains of Panama. "It's one of the most remote villages that is still inhabited. This area used to be covered in indigenous tribes of people but since Gregory Illéa's reign and the subsequent invasion of southern rebels, it's become much more established down here."

"Really?" I asked as we hit another bump and came out of our seats slightly.

"Running water is considered a luxury down here. So yes, having an actual road to a village makes things more established. Even if it is a dirt road." Everything Alice said had a bit of bite to it. Not in a sadistic sense but just in a way that shows that she has seen a lot of things in life and is chiseled from her experiences. I knew within moments of meeting her that morning that she was not someone to be trifled with.

She expertly handled her aluminum cup of coffee to make sure it didn't spill as we traveled deeper into the rainforest. Sweat collected on the back of my neck and I could feel the sun soaking the energy from me. I was baffled at how anyone could live in that kind of heat and get anything done.

"This is where we've focused the majority of my organization's rebuilding efforts. We actually teamed up with your Kile and he's been helping design more affordable, sturdy housing for these folks," she said. I winced at her choice of saying _your_ Kile.

"Where would you be if you weren't here?" Eikko asked, interested in the broader scope of her non-profit. But that was Eikko – the ever-curious, ever-compassionate man with a passion for caring for people.

"Up in Whites working in the town that was covered by the avalanche, or working in western Allens and Carolina for the poor there. We go where there is need, Prince Eikko," she said grimly. "Sometimes we have a hard time selecting."

Osten's bewildered smile fell as he looked away from the window. "You mean you choose _not_ to help some people?"

"If I could wave a magic wand and abolish poverty, I would have years ago. The reality is that poverty is as much a part of our economy as the wealthy. Where there's poverty, there's the opportunity for wealthy people to pose for the cameras in orphanages and coal mines to meet their humanitarian quota for the year," she said sardonically.

I raised my eyebrows. "So you're saying that we purposely keep people from succeeding economically?"

"No. I'm saying that far too many times I've seen rural poverty get swept under the rug for the sake of urban poverty because that's at the forefront of all news. You would never want Angeles looking like a dump, right? But you probably never once considered giving us asphalt to make the roads safer here."

My eyes fell downward to my lap because she was absolutely right and I was ashamed to admit it. Aside from the pollution and the cocoa beans that come from Panama, they were never more than a blip on my radar. "I'm sorry," I said, not knowing what else to tell her.

Alice waved her hand at me. "You have thirty-five provinces to look after. Some things are bound to slip through the cracks." She said it lightly but it wasn't at all. Yes, some things slipped through the cracks for my advisers and myself but it shouldn't be a whole province that falls to the wayside.

As the truck ambled further into the mountains, we could see more damage. Trees toppled over, places where large sections of the road had slid down the hill, trash littering the shoulders of the road. Stray animals dashed in front of the truck and when we drove through other villages, kids would run out and slap on the side of the truck to greet us. I laughed at their smiling faces, their excitement contagious.

Finally, we made it to the coastal village Alice had chosen for us to visit. Nothing could have prepared me for the sight there. The kids in this village were less enthusiastic as they greeted us. We parked in what Alice had said used to be the center of the village. There was nothing left around us.

In the distance, what looked like the original outskirts of the village, were studded frames and the beginnings of homes. There were camping tents set up where there was space and piles of trash and damaged goods piled to my height. Kids picked through the piles, some of them wearing what looked to be scraps of fabric that they happened to find in the aftermath, just to give them some sort of protection from the elements. Streams of murky, gray water flowed between our feet. Palm trees stood at forty-five degree angles with only half their palms left at the top.

Several picnic tables were set up near a concrete hut and that seemed to be the central hub for people. Osten followed behind Eikko and I at a slower pace, his eyes taking in everything around him. People seemed to be skirting around us as they went about their business. General Leger walked in my shadow but every once in a while I heard a small sound escape him, something between a sob and a cough.

One child had a skateboard that had been pulled from the rubble and went careening straight through our group, General Leger pulling me back roughly by my elbow. When we got to the tables where Alice's volunteers were set up, we noticed that it was mostly kids lined up there for food and fresh water.

"Why are they all kids?" I asked Alice quietly.

"They ran out of room in the shelter for everyone," she answered quietly, pointing to what really only seemed to be a box made of concrete. The roof had collapsed in on one side and most of the windows were cracked and broken. "The grown ups left to make room for kids there so that they could be safe." She didn't need to say anymore for me to understand what had happened.

"So most of these kids are orphans?" Eikko clarified as another group went running past us, a little boy holding a flat soccer ball in his arms. Alice nodded, her lips pressed together.

I found a familiar face at the food tables. Kile smiled when he saw me but his smile was even wider when he saw Alice. He came up and hugged me tightly and then gestured to Alice. "You've met my friend Lice?" he asked me, smirking.

"God, Kile," Alice scoffed, rolling her eyes.

"Lice?" Osten repeated.

"It's an inside joke. A _very_ inside joke," she answered vaguely as she shook her head at Kile. Even she was smiling though. The two were clearly close friends and I felt a pang in my heart to see that I was missing out on something.

Eikko's hand slid into mine and squeezed my fingers, causing me to look up at him and smile. Kile seemed to notice that the kids didn't really know how to approach us so he placed his hand on one of the boy's shoulders and said, "These are my friends Eadlyn, Osten and Erik. They're gonna hang out with us today."

The kids cheered and started chatting excitedly. Some of them ran off and started searching for toys in the piles of rubble. "So what are we doing?" I asked Alice.

"First, you can help us clear out the areas where we're planning on building the next few homes," she told me. She led us to a pile of shovels and rakes and brooms, handing a snow shovel to me. I must have looked apprehensive because she sighed and took the tool from my hand. "I have a better idea. Eikko, Osten, you're with Kile on excavation. You're with me," she said, pointing to me.

"Be careful," I said to Eikko and he started to respond but Kile was already grabbing a bunch of kids to go with them and their cheers at being chosen drowned out anything my husband said. Alice led me over to a truck that was fully loaded with grocery bags of food supplies. "What's in the bags?" I asked her.

"Sugar, spam, cans of beans, crackers, and this sugar-coated candies," she answered, climbing up on the back hitch of the truck. "Are you coming?"

I climbed up beside her and sat carefully, curling my fingers around the lip of the tailgate to have something to hold onto. The truck lurched forward and we started moving slowly down the road that was cleared earlier. I noticed Genera Leger in the armored truck following us. "How long have you guys been here?"

"We arrived before the first hurricane back in June. This last one wasn't even as strong as that one but there was such little infrastructure left that what was left, was just completely demolished," she explained, her eyes sweeping around us. "This place used to be lush with palm trees and full of life. Now…I don't know how to describe it. You know, before the first hurricane, companies were trying to buy this land to build resorts? I would never wish to displace people like that but maybe they would have been able to handle all of this. There would have been less lives lost, less damage to the community. I don't know, it just hurts my heart to see all of this destruction."

"Where do you even get the money and supplies for this?"

"My parents give me the funds for most of it. They were Twos – my mom by marriage – so they had a lot of money stashed up. Actually, my aunt gave me all of her money from being in the Selection – which was a lot. She wanted me to put it to good use."

My head snapped up to look at her. "Your aunt was in the Selection? My father's Selection?"

She nodded. "Natalie Luca. The jewelry designer."

"My mom wears her stuff all the time!" I exclaimed, recognizing the name. "One of my tiaras was designed by her."

Alice didn't look impressed by that at all. "Anyway, she let me have her money if I swore to name the non-profit after her sister, Lacey. When Aunt Natalie started her business, she didn't have the heart to name it after her. But after fifteen years, she felt ready to honor her."

"Wow. Are you two close?"

"She never had kids and my parents say I'm a lot like her. I never was content with just staying put – I was always on the move looking for a greater purpose in life. Aunt Natalie helped me find it by giving me that money."

"That's an incredible thing to do," I mused.

Alice smiled faintly, the first smile I'd seen on her face since we were with Kile. "The funny thing is, the more blessings I receive in life, the more I recognize them. I don't think you ever get used to it. With grace comes gratitude, and the more gratitude you have, the more you have to find grace in."

"I think you lost me," I admitted, trying to keep up with her.

"Kile said you weren't particularly meditative."

I grimaced, wondering what else Kile had told her about me. We were friends but I had just broken up with him when he met her – surely whatever he said wasn't all positive. I tried not to be offended by her words and chose to focus on what we were seeing.

I imagined having all of the funds of the national treasury at my disposal and how not even one percent of those funds would be enough for this community to be rebuilt to a standard far beyond what it was before. But I couldn't use all of that money in one place. It simply wasn't feasible. "Crazy," I whispered to myself.

Alice huffed. "What?"

"All of the money in this world wouldn't be able to fix what happened here. You could rebuild homes and churches and businesses but you can't rebuild these kids' lives."

"So how do you help them?" she asked in a way that I knew she had thought that very same question multiple times. "It's something I wrestle with on a regular basis. How can we help these people without hurting them? You can't give these kids handouts forever or they'll never be self-sufficient but they need the aid to get by. Where's the line?"

"It's a fine balance," I said. It was a fine balance I faced everyday when I made decisions about health care and the costs of education.

The truck stopped a mile down the road where some homes were still standing. They appeared to be made of concrete and were generally sturdier. "Their homes weren't destroyed but the flooding did it's work," Alice said to me quietly. "Grab as many as you can. We're going on foot from here."

I took an armful of bags and followed her from house to house, kids of all ages running out eagerly to greet us. They jumped up and down and clapped their hands as they waited for us to hand over the food. It warmed me to see how happy they were to get just the minimum of staples but it left me hurting, thinking of how little this actually would do for them in the long run.

We were over halfway through with handing out the food when a girl stopped me by pulling on hand. She was small, I hadn't even noticed her approach me. She was wearing a dirty pink cami and purple shorts, her messy black hair in a loose ponytail. Her young eyes were shining as she held up a small xylophone toy to me. I remembered these toys from when I was a kid, little plastic keys with rainbow buttons that made different noises. One quick glance at the back of this one and it was obvious that the buttons weren't working since there were no batteries inside. She was holding a wooden spoon though and when she had my attention, she tapped various keys with the end of the spoon.

"That was pretty. Can you do it again?" I asked her.

She smiled, showing all of her teeth, and tapped out the melody again. I laughed and sat down on a chunk of concrete at the site of a home that had once been standing. She passed me the toy and nodded, encouraging me to play. "You want me to play?" She nodded again. "Well, I can't make any promises."

Mom had tried to teach me piano as a kid but I had never been able to have my hands doing two completely different things at once. I just didn't have the mental capabilities for it. Managing a miniature xylophone with one wooden spoon couldn't be too bad though. I tapped through the melody of a song Mom would sing to us as kids, and one of the first songs that she taught us how to play on piano. The girl clapped and squealed. She grabbed the spoon from my hand and surprised me by playing the next phrase of the song.

"You know it?"

She nodded enthusiastically. Then she dashed further into the rubble of the home and came back with a broken pallet of wood that was painted. It was missing more than half of it, guessing from the dimensions of what she had. We could still see that a music staff and notes had been printed on the wood and it was the song I was playing.

My heart sank. "This is your home?" As she nodded, her smile vanished. "Where's your family?"

Then she pointed to the ground and put a hand to her heart, wooden spoon still clenched in her fingers. "Gone," she said simply, her voice a lot stronger than I thought it would be.

"What's your name?"

"Loren."

"Do you know the words to the song?" I asked her, pointing to the toy.

She nodded. "Spanish."

I smiled and shrugged. "That's okay. I play, you sing." And she did. I only vaguely knew the words she had said, only from hearing Mom speak Spanish from time to time on the phone to my great-aunt but I wasn't fluent by any means.

By the time we finished the first verse, Alice had come over with some other kids in tow. General Leger had what almost looked like tears in his eyes when I glanced up at him and I knew that my dad would have been proud of me. There were no cameras or reporters around to capture this moment; it was all for me to hold onto.

Loren followed me everywhere I went for the rest of the day and though Alice had muttered something about liability issues, she let it slide. Loren's interaction with us made it easier for the other kids to approach us, forgetting that I was their queen and a total stranger to them and asking me to play with them. Once we reunited with Osten and Eikko, my husband organized a soccer game for all of the kids. His soccer skills were dismal compared to theirs but they were all having fun. Alice said that it was the most she'd seen them smile since the hurricane. Even if we weren't doing any real work, we were making a difference. Maybe relationships were more important than construction after all.

Osten stopped to catch his breath at one point of the game and I noticed him wander off to the side, looking not toward the game but in the opposite direction where the village lay in ruin. I sidled up next to him and folded my arms.

"How're you feeling?" I asked.

"I don't like this, Eads," he admitted.

I nodded. "It's hard to see, isn't it?"

"We just sit in a palace, on velvet chairs eating off of silver plates, It's not fair." He kicked at a piece of unrecognizable rubble with the toe of his brand new sneakers. "I want to do more."

I smiled faintly and nodded. "Okay."

"Okay?" he repeated, seeming shocked that I agreed.

"You can do anything you want, Osten. You can take your life in any direction you want, go to any college you want, maybe even not go to college. It's all up to you."

"And happens under the watchful eye of General Leger."

We both glanced over to where General Leger was sitting on the edge of his truck, his uniform unbuttoned at the collar as some of the boys were trying on his hat and inspecting his sword. "Damn right," I said, giggling. I threw an arm around Osten's shoulders, realizing suddenly that he was just a couple inches shorter than me and that before I knew it, he would be all grown up. "It's about time you made a name for yourself," I teased.

"I just want to make a difference."

"We all do, Osten. Funny, isn't it? All of the power we have and yet we're trapped by the fact that everything we do has to look good or be polished."

"Maybe you can change that too," he said hopefully, going back to being my boyish, ever-hopeful little brother.

"Maybe." I squeezed him again.

All too soon, General Leger was steering us back into our armored vehicles and we were on our way back to the royal safe house. It felt ridiculous walking through a marble entryway after the day we'd had, our clothes covered in filth from the rubble of homes that had been destroyed not two weeks earlier.

Eikko and I showered and then got ready for bed, exhaustion making my bones heavy. We lay on our sides, facing each other, whispering even though we were completely alone and not in any danger of being overheard. There were ideas buzzing around in our minds that we whispered about excitedly, assuring each other that we would carry this trip with us for the remainder of our lives.

When we arrived back at Angeles, I wasted no time in going to my mom. "Mom, I need your help. How would you like to have a little project?" I asked her as she put her book down, looking bored out of her mind. Dad was due back later that night so I was sure that she was bored.

"What kind of project?"

"Something stress-free and easy."

"Of course," she said, not believing that one bit.

"How would you and Miss Lucy like to start an initiative for orphans?"

Mom narrowed her eyes at me. "What are you up to, Eadlyn?"

"I'm just trying to keep you from going crazy from boredom. There are absolutely no ulterior motives here." But we shared a knowing smile with each other and the mischievous twinkle in Mom's eye was enough for me to know that she was on board.


	15. Chapter 15

My desk was swamped with work from the five days I had been gone from work. If this was just from five days, what would it look like when I went away for weeks at a time? The times that Dad left for three weeks were few and far between, only once every two years or so, but those trips still happened and I was starting to question the necessity of hiring Kaden as a royal secretary just to minimize the work I missed. Even with Mom picking up some of Dad's work, he must have come home to mountains since she could only do so much with taking care of four kids herself.

That was the benefit of Eikko and I though. I only imagined us having a couple of kids and it was definitely down the road. Neither of us felt ready to start having kids right away. I loved having a big family and being closer to my parents in age but I didn't feel ready to be a mother and I wanted the palace to be a home, not a madhouse with dozens of kids running around and me trying to keep up with them _and_ run a country.

Brice came in, all business as usual, coffee cup in one hand and a pile of folders in the other. "For your security briefing later, Your Majesty," she said, sitting down in her chair across from me. "It has updated security measures for the palace, new procedures for guards, and changes for travel security."

"Why all the extra measures?" I asked, lifting a corner slightly to peek inside but the stack of folders was as tall as a small dog. There was no way I was going to even make a dent in all of this work before bed.

"A monarch was just assassinated and France – a major ally to Illéa – is now at war. That puts everyone at risk. We're not going all out quite yet but this is where General Leger would like to start."

I nodded and wrote a note for Brice. "Deliver this to my mother's desk. Get Miss Marlee to meet with her while I'm with General Leger in this security meeting."

Brice looked puzzled by my command. "Are we hiding something from General Leger?"

"I don't know, are we?" I said, winking conspiratorially.

She matched my smile and bobbed quickly as a curtsy. "My lips are sealed, Your Majesty."

I waited for Brice to return before walking with her to the conference room where the security meeting was taking place. With Brice largely handling the domestic affairs in our new government, she attended security meetings but with the threats to security looming from both inside and outside our borders, we both needed to be present.

"How was Panama? I never got the opportunity to ask you. You got home and right away you were taken to do Report clips and go to pressing meetings. Have you had a chance to breathe yet?"

I laughed. "No, actually. But Panama was great. France was wonderful too until…yeah. It was a good trip."

"Have you talked to Ahren in the last few days?" There was more to that question. I could hear it. I wasn't sure to be unnerved by how many people were suddenly doubting the solidity of my relationship with my twin or to be touched that they obviously cared.

"Ahren and I have nothing to talk about right now," I told her vaguely, slightly aggravated.

"Eadlyn—"

"What?" I snapped. She stopped abruptly outside the door to the security conference room. "What? Ahren and I are married, we have our own spouses, our own countries to run. We're now living two separate lives. It doesn't matter how often I talk to my brother."

"He's not just your brother, Eadlyn. He's your twin."

"I know he's my twin!" I exclaimed. Some guards passed us to go inside, bowing as they went. I waited for them to be inside before continuing in a hushed voice. "He's been my twin my whole life. But if I start using that as a reason to be nice to him as an ally, I'll never be able to stop. I need to separate him from diplomacy."

Brice held her hands up in surrender, affronted by my attitude. "Understood." She waved her arm at the door. "Shall we go in?"

I walked in ahead of her and sat down right away so that the guards didn't have to wait any longer to take their seats. I was desperate for a cup of coffee to help curb my fatigue but I knew better than to drink coffee. In my mind, I was careful to justify not having coffee by telling myself that it was because I didn't want to use the bathroom in the middle of the meeting.

General Leger opened the meeting by delivering an updated report on the status of the war between France and North Africa. It had been relatively quiet in the last few days as both countries gathered their supplies and soldiers. The only incident he had to report was the sinking of a military vessel in the Mediterranean.

"Now, Your Majesty, we must discuss our plans moving forward," General Leger said as he paced at one end of the table.

"I agree," I said.

"We cannot aid France in their fight," General Leger told me. "I'm sorry Eadlyn, I know that Prince Ahren is your brother and you've known Queen Camille your whole life but we can't afford to go to war."

Brice nodded and focused on me as well. "Absolutely. Going forward, we need to keep our relations with France amicable but we can't be too friendly. Otherwise, it'll only be harder to say no when they ask for help."

"Which they will," Sir Andrews threw in. "As will North Africa. We're all allies in this war and things are about to get messy. With the changes to the government and our own upheaval currently, it's wiser to remain neutral. We have our own wars to fight."

"Not fight – end," General Leger amended. Sir Andrews nodded as some of the other security advisers started mumbling about their own ideas and concerns about the current state of the northern hemisphere. Lady Brice chimed in every few moments or so as she saw fit but for all intents and purposes, I was invisible to them. I was a child sitting in on some meeting that I didn't belong in and they could care less about my input. It felt like I was back in training with my dad, not speaking unless he asked for my opinion and just watching him to learn. Dad wasn't there though and this room was in my command.

I cleared my throat and pushed my shoulders back, sitting taller and prouder in my seat. " _Excuse me_ ," I said loudly. The room quieted and everyone looked to me as if they had just remembered that I was there.

"Queen Eadlyn, we're just trying to remind you of the risks you're facing—" General Leger began.

I quickly interrupted him. "General Leger, have a seat."

His eyes widened, stunned that I was ordering him to sit down. After he took his seat, a chair he very rarely sat in because he was always moving and pacing during meetings, I began. "Listen to me ladies and gentlemen – I know I haven't been in this position of your active queen for a long time. However, I have been the heir for my entire life. When I was seven and my father made the final deal of peace with New Asia, affectively ending all fights we had with them, I was there. When Dominica decided that they wanted to secede, I listened in on the phone conference he had with their mayor where they struck the deal to be remain. I have been trained for this for my entire life and I'll be damned if I let you all dictate my moves now, when I am finally in full control. I know that we must remain neutral, I know that we are entering a challenging time. And it's a good thing that I know that because unlike you all who are only just now grasping that and are only speaking about the problems we're going to encounter, I've come prepared to discuss solutions."

Sir Andrews shifted uncomfortably in his chair. The other guards stared down at the table in shame for being scolded. General Leger was doing everything he could to not make eye contact with me.

"And for heaven's sake, if any one of you try to tell me one more time how to handle things with _my_ brother, you will be fired," I threatened. "And if you didn't understand any of that, feel free to take your leave now." Silence fell over the room and I nodded, sensing that they'd gotten the message. "Great. Now, Brice will distribute my itinerary for the next month or so. We added a couple things after my trip to Panama; I've been moved by the stories from the village we visited and I hope to be able to give back to some of those people with the added charity events."

General Leger was frowning deeply as he read through my schedule. "Your Majesty, if I may just interject before we get too far in this discussion but right now is not the best time for public appearances."

I frowned. "And why is that?"

"Queen Daphne was just assassinated and two of our allies are at war. There's a protocol we must follow."

"What protocol?" I demanded, flattening my hands against the table in front of me in an effort to keep them still.

"In order to protect the monarchy, you must remain inside the palace for the immediate future and limit the guests permitted inside. We are, for all intents and purposes, on lockdown."

"Lockdown? You have to be kidding!"

"It's for your protection," General Leger emphasized.

I slapped my hand down with a loud thump. "To hell with my protection! How am I supposed to rule my people if I'm held under a lock and key? How am I going to know what they want or need if I can't even talk to them?"

Brice cut in. "Queen Eadlyn, we have solutions for these concerns. Your parents did this for the months following King Maxon's coronation—"

"Well that's great for them but I'm not content to just sit around twiddling my thumbs while my people are starving or fighting each other or demanding free apples or something else preposterous," I ranted.

"We can try out those town halls," Brice said quickly, trying to talk me down from my ledge.

"Because those worked so well five months ago?"

"We can't compromise with the lockdown but we can work with your somewhat limited options within the palace," she explained. "Have representatives from each province come and visit, voice their concerns with you…like I said, this worked well for your parents when they were still adjusting to their new roles here."

I shook my head, still seething. "I don't like it. The people are already complaining about how distant I am; how is this going to help that?"

Sir Andrews spoke up. "Bottom line, the monarchy is in a precarious state right now."

All heads turned in his direction. "What do you mean, Sir Andrews?" I asked in a tone that made it clear to not mess with me.

"Well, it is written that if Queen Eadlyn and her consort are unfit to rule, King Ahren would succeed but he is…preoccupied. His sudden marriage was unplanned. If we'd had any say in it, he would have married Camille several years down the line. Because right now, Prince Kaden is next in line but he's not of age so it would then fall back to Queen America and King Maxon to be regents. All of this would be resolved by an heir."

I froze as advisers started whispering their agreement around the table. General Leger half-rose from his seat, ready to defend me but he seemed to be speechless. Brice jumped to her feet. "She's been married for no more than two weeks and you're already talking about an heir?" she exclaimed.

"With the state of the world, we cannot be too safe," Sir Andrews said. "We need to reinforce her claim on the throne."

"Even if she were to give you an heir in the next year, it would be another eighteen years until that heir is of age and can rule," Brice argued.

"But Prince Kaden could take over," he said.

Brice snorted. "Then we're back to this initial problem. Kaden isn't old enough so it would fall to Maxon and America and they cannot be burdened with that stress."

"But if she just had an heir, it would resolve any confusion over who would rule next," Sir Andrews. "She needs a child for the people to know and build a connection with as their future monarch."

"She's eighteen!" Brice yelled, losing all control. "Just let her be a girl and be married and stop trying to force her to grow up so soon!"

"She's the queen of Illéa!" Sir Andrews shouted back, matching her ferocity. "She is not just any other newlywed. She has responsibilities not just as a wife but as a queen and as a married queen. Those responsibilities primarily lie in the provision of an heir."

"Enough!" General Leger said, rising to his feet. "Eadlyn is not giving you an heir anytime soon, understood? No matter what you say, that's a decision for her to make with her husband. And beside that, you could never convince her parents of a good enough reason for her to give you an heir so quickly. Look at Queen Elizabeth I of England: she never had an heir and she is one of the most famous queens to have ever ruled. This decision is Eadlyn and Eikko's and I better not see family planning on any meeting agenda moving forward."

Sir Andrews focused his gaze on me. "Queen Eadlyn, you must understand this duty you have to your country—"

"This meeting is over for me," I said decisively. "Whatever you all want to do with the security here in the palace, you have my approval. Any questions can be delivered to me through Brice." I stormed out of the room, fighting to catch my breath.

No part of me wanted to go back to my study and keep working. I just needed a moment to myself where I could think and process everything. There were only so many places for a queen to hide though. Even the queens who were long gone were preserved with the simple stroke of a brush and hung where they could watch over their descendants.

Grandma Amberly was looking as tranquil as ever in her portrait hanging upstairs. I sat on the bench I would always sit on, a small red velvet cushion adjacent to her portrait. When I was younger, I would find Dad up here a lot, sometimes talking aloud to the portrait as he sat cross-legged on the plush carpet beneath her. I would hide around the corner and listen to him purge himself of worries for his country, his children, and his wife. Every once in a while Mom would be there, standing right at the foot of the portrait, chewing on a thumb nail anxiously as she studied the portrait. From what they told us, Grandma Amberly was revered by the Illéan people and the country mourned for months following her death, their grief only curbed by Mom and Dad's wedding and coronation celebrations. Over the years, as my parents either became more confident as rulers or simply outgrew their need for direction, their visits had become more infrequent.

Now it seemed like I was the only one to gaze upon my late grandmother. I used to judge Dad for talking out loud to her but for me, it seemed like the only thing I could do.

"Hi Grandma," I whispered tentatively. "This feels weird." I paused because that was the natural pause in conversation and it was her turn to respond but after a few moments I remembered that no response would be coming. "Right, this is all one-sided. Well, I mean, I don't really know why I'm here."

Her eyes – my eyes – gazed down at me, warm in the golden light of the windows behind me. They were so open and expressive, a mother's gaze. I could see understanding there. Dad certainly inherited her wisdom and comprehension.

"I guess I just…you were probably scared too, right? I mean, I think any queen who was fearless in her job was either lying to herself or a bad queen because I can't seem to stop worrying about things. Mom and Dad seem to look up to you a lot and I like to think that in me, they can see you. I guess I'm just scared of becoming my own queen. I've always wanted to be as smart as Dad, as calm as you, and as passionate as Mom but it's scary to think about what people will have to say about me years down the line.

"It's especially scary to think about that – the future. There are so many things that are unknown yet it seems like it has all been decided for me already. I just want to lay a good foundation for my child to take over. That's probably all you wanted with Dad, right? I think that we get better with each generation but maybe it's not actually getting better. Maybe it's simply being different. Maybe by easing the burden of responsibility on the monarch, it will finally get better. That's all I can hope for, really." I took a deep breath. I thought about the most immediate future and smiled slightly. "I'm scared but I'm also excited for what this year will hold. I just hope that I can manage everything as gracefully as you."

I heard the click of heels from around the corner and abruptly stopped talking, shrinking back slightly to hopefully look more casual in my seat. It was just a maid passing though. Grandma Amberly's portrait wasn't a strange place for maids and butlers to find us so I didn't bat an eye at being discovered there.

A much quieter set of footsteps followed the maid and my middle brother rounded the corner, not at all surprised to find me sitting there. "How…?" I asked, wondering how he knew where I was.

"General Leger," he said, pointing to the ceiling. I followed his finger and saw a tiny, miniscule camera in the ceiling directly above me. These cameras were courtesy of August Illéa, who insisted that the palace would be safer with cameras. They were really only used to cheat during games of hide-and-go-seek though. Kaden sat down next to me and leaned his head against the windowsill behind us. "Lot of people looking for you."

"I bet."

"You stormed out of a meeting?" he asked in disbelief.

"Are you really that surprised?"

He was quiet for a moment. "I guess not." We were quiet as we both stared up at Grandma Amberly. Kaden bore hardly any resemblance to her whatsoever. His eyes were the only things that he had in common with her. I wondered what he saw when he saw her. "So what happened?"

I sighed, just wanting to go back to bed and sleep for the next eight months or so. "It's not important. Nothing really urgent was discussed except for our impending World War and my reproductive plans."

Kaden chuckled. "That's…amazing." He started laughing in earnest and hearing him laugh, I couldn't keep the smile off my face. "Does that mean your gynecologist is going to be invited to your meetings from now on?"

I gasped. "Kaden!"

"What? Dad gave me the talk years ago…and more recently."

"Why?" I asked, scrunching up my nose.

"Josie."

"Josie? Josie Woodwork? Are things serious?"

Kaden stood up and pointed a finger at me. "You know what? Don't try to change the subject to my love life. I was really interested in hearing about your family planning," he said sarcastically.

"Yeah, right," I said, following him as he left.

"No, really. I find it all just so fascinating. Tell me, Queen Eadlyn, when will you give us an heir? The people deserve it you know."

I rolled my eyes. "Shut up."

We walked down to the third floor, laughing loudly enough that Raelynn would have dropped dead if she heard us, and found the third floor in utter chaos. Media analysts and members of Gavril's team were running to and fro, in and out of Dad's private study and downstairs to their offices. Brice's voice could be heard from my office. Mixed in were guards and General Leger issuing orders.

"How did this get out?" Brice demanded into a cell phone.

Our smiles vanished as we slowly approached the whole scene. Gavril was standing beside Brice and said placidly, "There are far worse things to be leaked."

"Not right now, there aren't!" Brice snapped, hanging up the phone with a flick of her hair. "Eadlyn! Eadlyn, good, we need you to make a statement."

"What?" I asked. "Why do I need to make a statement?"

"Somehow the media got word of your mother's surgery. It's all a mess. There are rumors saying that she's dying, that she's sick, that she's both sick and dying. We need you in hair and makeup _now_ ," Brice said, grabbing my elbow and pulling me in the direction of the studio.

"Wait, wait, wait," I said.

"Don't have time!"

"Brice!" I snapped, wrenching my elbow out of her grip. "Why is this so terrible?"

Her eyes widened. "Why is this so terrible? The people think their queen is dying or ill. We need to set the record straight."

"I'm still not seeing why this is so bad."

"Eadlyn, which members of the royal family are here in the palace right now?"

Confused by her questioned, I quickly listed, "Me, Eikko, Kaden, Osten and Mom."

"And your father?"

"In France."

"Right. Your mother is about undergo open heart surgery and your father just took an extended vacation to France. How do you think that looks to the public?"

"I guess it looks bad. But who could question Mom and Dad's relationship? They all watched them fall in love."

Brice shrugged. "Except the polls are saying that morale surrounding the public's opinion of your parents has fallen since her heart attack."

"How? Dad has barely left her side."

"They don't know that. For all they know, America has suddenly been diagnosed with a heart disease and your father is ashamed and has gone running off to France. Do you remember those rumors about him having an affair with Queen Daphne?"

"They're preposterous," I said through gritted teeth.

"Yet your father travels to France alone to mourn her," Brice said. "Look, it all is ridiculous and nonsensical but this is what the public needs to hear. They need to know that your family is united and being supportive of your mother and that you all love her very much." She called for General Leger. "How fast can we get Ahren back here in Illéa?"

General Leger looked at her like she had lost her mind. Now that I had the time to look around and collect my bearings, it was obvious that Brice was the one stirring up all of this chaos. "Um, not for another month probably. His wife just started a war, remember?"

"Well we need him here," Brice insisted. "We need all Schreave children here with their parents right now." Tears were brimming in her eyes, making her look more like a child throwing a temper tantrum than an adult doing her job.

I held up a hand to General Leger, stopping whatever response he had prepared for her. "Brice, let's go get my hair and makeup touched up, okay?" This time, I was pulling her in the direction of the studio as she started crying in earnest. When we were alone in the makeup room, I forced her to face me. "Brice, what is going on?"

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "I'm sorry, I can control myself, I promise. I'm fine. I'm fine."

"Brice." Her eyes scrunched up again as she sobbed more, shaking her head. "Brice, tell me what's going on."

Her watery eyes met mine. "I've spent most of my life protecting your family from the public. I just want you all to have easy, boring lives. I've dedicated myself to ensuring that the public doesn't tear you apart. Now I have failed at keeping your mother's deepest secret."

"Something is telling me that her impending heart surgery isn't her deepest secret," I reminded her. "Perhaps it's her half-sister-in-law?"

Brice smiled ruefully. "I'm worried, Eadlyn. She's become the closest thing to a mother for me. A weird, maternal sister, I guess. And him…he's my brother. I don't want to see him hurt."

"I know," I said, understanding what she was feeling.

"He loves you all but America…I've never seen a man love a woman as much as he loves her. Except for maybe Eikko," she added with a gratuitous grin. "I just want them to live happily ever after. They deserve it."

"I agree. But don't you think that they already kind of have? I mean, they have a family, they've seen their country prosper, they've been surrounded by friends and loved ones for the better part of the last twenty years…I think they've lived pretty happily already."

Brice nodded and wiped her eyes. "I think you're right."

"And I think they'll make it through this."

"Okay. Yeah. They will. Sorry, I'm a mess and I really ought to be doing my job now."

"I'm sure the queen can excuse you just this once for not being totally on top of things." I paused before saying, "You know, I think this statement would be much more effective if my father spoke. Maybe, for now, we can have Gavril release a very generic statement about the health of my mother and then when my father gets home, he can give more details."

Brice chewed on her lip nervously and the nodded. "You know, Your Majesty, I'm starting to think that you're in the wrong vocation." We shared another smile and we walked outside, ready to sort out our latest mess together.


	16. Chapter 16

My head bobbed and I jumped in my seat, blinking my eyes blearily. Eikko was sitting across from me at my desk with eyes full of concern. "Are you okay?" he asked, drawing the attention of every single person in the room. General Leger and Brice were staring at me with the same amount of worry as Eikko. Sundays were normally slow days in the palace. They were my opportunity to catch up on random bits of work that don't get finished during the week. General Leger didn't even come in every Sunday even though he tried. Advisers were given the day off and breakfast was at nine-thirty instead of eight-thirty. That didn't prevent me from sleeping in by accident though.

"Fine, just tired," I said, yawning. I stretched my arms and saw that it wasn't even noon yet.

"What are you working on today?" Eikko asked and I remembered right then that I had promised him earlier in the week that we would have the day to ourselves. With all of my worries though, I couldn't face him for a whole day.

"We're getting foreign guests this week and I wanted to read up on our last contracts with them so that I am prepared," I explained smoothly. Neena came in with another cup of coffee and set it in front of me. My stomach turned into a bundle of knots though as I looked at the extremely light roast – highly caffeinated – mug just a few feet from me.

Eikko pursed his lips and walked around my desk to sit closer to me. "It seems like you're avoiding me." The hurt in his voice was palpable and turned my bones to mush.

"I'm not avoiding you," I said quietly, wanting him to know that I did sincerely love him and that I was definitely not avoiding his company. But wasn't I? That's why I came and hid in my study, pleading that there would be enough work for me to do to justify spending the day locked inside. That's why I had been working late every single night to minimize the time I spent with him at night. I just needed time to be in my own head and think about things.

"Then what's going on inside your head? You've been out of it all week. I'm worried that I did something wrong," he admitted.

I shook my head and put the report I had been reading down. "Could you guys please give us the room?" I asked Neena, Lady Brice and General Leger. Once it was just the two of us I reached for Eikko's hand. "I love you."

"Then what is it that's taking you from me?"

"It's nothing…just that my period is eight days late."

Eikko's eyes widened and he opened his mouth several times, trying to think of something to say and trying to mask his surprise. He was smart and had a sister; he knew how the female anatomy worked. And it wasn't something I normally hid from him, not that I could if I tried. He was my husband after all and we'd been sleeping together for months. "A week is a long time, right?" he asked. "I mean, they're not typically that late, right?"

"Not unless they never come."

"But I'm sure it's late or something."

I nodded. "Yeah, it could just be late."

"Of course. I mean, just because it's been more than a week doesn't mean…"

"Not at all," I assured him but neither of us was falling for it. "Even though my period has been regular and on time for the past five years, it could definitely just be late. By more than a week."

He was quiet as he stared at his shoes. "We should go to the hospital," he said quietly.

My body tensed. This was exactly why I didn't want to tell him. Going to the hospital meant getting answers and answers meant that I couldn't sit in my study and hide from what my body was trying to tell me. At the same time, if I was…I would need the right care. This wasn't something that was just my responsibility; it was a matter of state. "I have a lot to do," I lied lamely.

Eikko pried the folder from my fingers and pulled on both of my hands to get me out of my chair. "The reports will be here when you get back," he said gently. "Please, humor me. How do we know this isn't some freak parasite you picked up in Panama?"

I let him drag me downstairs to the hospital wing. As worried as I was about my future though, I did feel infinitely times better with Eikko there at my side. Even if he was just as freaked as me. I reached for the door handle to the hospital wing to open it when I heard my father's voice inside, wishing Dr. Ashlar a good day.

I spun and pointed to the large window near us with curtains hanging to the floor. "Go hide behind that curtain!" I hissed. "My father is right inside. He cannot see us both here together; he'll know what's going on right away." He seemed to be paralyzed with fear, unable to move or back away. "Go, go, go! Hide!" I pushed him back and he finally snapped out of his paralysis.

He barely made it behind the curtain before my dad was stepping into the hallway. I plastered the widest smile I could manage on my face. "Eadlyn, what are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here?" I repeated, wracking my brain for any excuse. "That's a great question. But you know, it's not all about me here. What about you? What brings you here?"

"I'm getting medicine for your mother," he answered, eyeing me suspiciously. "Everything okay? You're grinning like a sociopath."

I forced out a laugh. "Dad, you are funny. Haven't you ever seen a woman happy and in love? I've just married the man I love, I just got a pool, and reforming the government hasn't turned out to be a disaster. Why wouldn't everything be great?"

"Uh-huh," he said, clearly not convinced. "Why are you here?"

"Migraine," I answered and touched a finger to my temple. "Really need some pain medicine."

Dad nodded and walked past me, still looking suspicious of me. Just when I thought that I was clear, he turned and asked, "You know there's migraine medicine in your desk?"

I cringed, knowing he'd caught me in my lie. All I could hope was that he wouldn't keep asking me what I was really doing there. "Would you believe me if I said that I wanted it to be fresh?"

"You're lucky your mom really needs this medicine," Dad said, holding up the bottle of pills for me to see. "I expect an explanation later." He disappeared around the corner and my shoulders sagged in defeat.

Eikko extricated himself from the curtain and I looked at him hopelessly. "Was that as bad as it sounded to me?"

"Worse, I think," he said, pity on his face.

"Let's just go get this over with." Dr. Ashlar was inside the hospital wing with one of his many attendings, talking him through a medical chart.

"Queen Eadlyn, I was just talking to your father," he said, looking surprised to see me. "Prince Erik, pleasure to see you. Hopefully everything is okay." His eyes dashed between the two of us, trying to decipher what had brought both us here at noon on a Sunday.

I glanced awkwardly at his attending surgeon, not sure if I really trusted a kid close to my age to keep this a secret. Not when Dr. Ashlar – who had become head doctor at the palace shortly before Dad's Selection – was there and willing to help. "Could we speak somewhere private?" I asked tentatively.

Dr. Ashlar put his clipboard down and gestured to a room to our left and I practically ran inside, naturally taking a place on the exam table. Eikko sat down next to me, still holding my hand.

"So I'm assuming you're the patient?" Dr. Ashlar asked. He always had a special place in his heart for my mom and was therefore all the more willing to help me with anything. He was like my cool uncle that would always give me everything I asked. I guess that's what I got from the man who delivered me and all of my siblings, plus Kile and Josie and countless other babies in the palace.

"Um, so…" I stammered, not knowing where to begin. "My period is late."

Dr. Ashlar pursed his lips, trying to hide his smile. "I see. Seeing that you both are here, I'm assuming you both have already done the math?"

"We're really hoping that we're bad at math," I said quietly, ducking my head. Eikko frowned in confusion but squeezed my hand anyway, telling me that he was there no matter what.

"Have you had any other symptoms? Nausea, fatigue, moodiness?"

I was about to deny all of them when Eikko chimed in with, "She's slept late almost every day this past week and she's still exhausted, as you can probably tell."

"You're on the pill, correct?"

I pushed my hair back from my face nervously. "I forgot to take it. I've been a bit busy lately."

Dr. Ashlar nodded, finally locating my file on his computer. "Your mom did that a lot too. There were many mornings where your father drug her here to get a pregnancy screening only to have it be negative."

"So there's hope?" I asked, probably too cheerfully.

"There's definitely hope. But she would only miss it one day. How many days did you forget?"

I hesitated. I hadn't told Eikko about me forgetting. I didn't even realize that I had forgotten until Eloise asked me if I'd need a new prescription soon. "Five days."

"Hmm. Well, I'll take some blood and run it through. We have a lab here where I can screen it and get the answers back within minutes." He picked up a vial and a needle, instructing me to hold out my arm. Despite being a royal kid – a royal kid whose maternal side of the family has a hereditary heart disease – and having to get countless physicals and blood tests a year, I never did get used to needles. I turned my head to Eikko as he stuck a vein on the inside of my elbow and quickly drew the blood to process it. "I'll be back in a few minutes."

Eikko let out a long breath and wiped his hands on the tops of his legs. "You forgot, huh?" he asked. But he wasn't angry. His expression was guarded and closed off, making it difficult for me to discern what he was feeling about all of this.

"I'm sorry," I said guiltily.

"You know, it isn't such a bad thing," he said slowly.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You're not the one trying to reform a governmental system that has been in place for almost a century. It's not like I have the time for a baby right now. The advisers already treat me differently because I'm a girl. Having a baby isn't going to solve that." Before I knew it, tears were slowly streaming down my face and I wiped them away furiously, angry at myself and my own forgetfulness and my duties as queen making me forget to take my pill.

"Hey, hey," Eikko stood and perched on the edge of the table next to me, putting his arm around my shoulders. "Let's look on the bright side of things."

"Which is what?"

He smiled wryly. "The advisers won't have to hound us about giving them an heir. And this is all hypothetical anyway because we don't know if you're pregnant."

I sighed and looked down at my lap. Now that he'd said the actual word, I couldn't deny it anymore. "Eikko, I'm pregnant. We both know that."

"You know I will be there through it all, right? I'm never going to leave you. When you get back from a long day of meetings and disagreements over trade contracts, I'll be there to give you a hand massage or shoulder rub. When you complain to me about getting fat – because I know you will complain – I'll be there to remind you of just how beautiful you are and always will be to me. And when you're trying to care for the country and a newborn simultaneously, I'll be there at night to feed the baby so that you can rest. Because you deserve all of that and infinitely more."

"But my parents…Are you really ready to face their reactions? Because they're going to have to know soon. My mom had four kids for Pete's sake; she knows what it looks like to be pregnant."

He pushed my hair away from my face. "You're worrying a lot about other people, you know that right?" He shook his head with a small smile, as if he found me funny. "The first night we slept together, remember what you said? You wanted it to be our own night. You wanted it to be something that belonged to only us and no one else. Well, now we have a baby that belongs to us because we made the decision ourselves. Not because advisers told us to do it or because the people wanted an heir but because we made this conscious decision on our own. Maybe not to have a baby together but to at least take that step in our relationship."

I melted into his side, putting my head on his shoulder. "You always have the right thing to say," I told him. Truly, I felt better than I ever imagined I could feel about this, thanks to him. I was infinitely grateful for the fact that I had been able to choose him, for Daddy telling me I could choose him.

Dr. Ashlar came in then, clipboard held close to his chest. He raised his eyebrows at me and said, "Well, you're only five weeks along. May I be the first to offer you a congratulations."

Eikko kissed my cheek and I gulped in quick breaths, feeling like my lungs were caving in on themselves. I nodded and took a deep, shuddering breath. "Okay," I said softly.

Dr. Ashlar handed Eikko a bottle of pills. "Every day, twice a day." He focused his eyes on me again. "While we're here I'd like to get your vitals. I have your benchmark vitals to measure against. With your mother's family having a history of heart conditions, I also need to keep a close eye on you. Pregnancy puts great stress on the body and on your heart. You'll need to come for an appointment every two weeks; this is the heir so we can't take any chances."

I swallowed again, my mouth bone dry. "Thank you," I stammered. "I'm going to be a mom?" I asked, looking at Eikko.

"You're going to be the _best_ mom," he answered. "We'll do this together, okay? I'm right here. Anything you need."

It turned out to be much easier than I thought to keep our little one a secret. With only being a few weeks along, I wasn't showing any major symptoms. I wasn't puking up my guts every five minutes and I didn't have any strange food aversions or cravings. My breasts weren't any larger or more sensitive. It almost felt like a dream, easily forgotten during the day as I focused on my duties as queen. It would only become real again at night when I got back to my room where Eikko was always waiting with my vitamins and a glass of water.

Imagine my surprise then when Mom called me down to the Women's Room just a week after we had it confirmed and asked me flat-out, "Are you pregnant?"

I forgot how to breathe for a moment and I thought my heart actually stopped. "Mom, I…how?" I asked, knowing that I couldn't lie to her.

"I'm your mother Eadlyn," she said simply.

"Yeah, but I'm only six weeks. I can't even tell I'm pregnant."

She kept her face unreadable as she said, "But I can. You're glowing, Eady. And all of those little glances you exchange with Eikko now? Not to mention how he watches you like a hawk." She folded her hands in her lap and played with her engagement ring. "Your father also mentioned that he saw you going to the hospital wing last week, which is when this all started."

"Does Dad know?" I asked. If Dad knew, I could never face him. I was his little girl. How was he going to handle me becoming a mother so soon?

"Do you think your father knows?" she asked me, a small smile playing on her lips. She was right, of course. Eikko would have been questioned by Dad by now if he knew. "You're not in trouble, Eadlyn."

"Why am I so scared though?" I took another deep breath, not knowing how to explain my whirlwind of emotions to her.

She was definitely smiling now. She patted the seat next to her, which I gladly took. "Alright, lesson number one of motherhood: you never feel ready. I was just a little older than you were and had been married for two years already but when I found out I was having twins? It was the most terrified I had been in years."

"But you're exactly right; you had been married for two years. I've been married for a month. I got married four weeks ago but my baby was conceived six weeks ago."

She patted my knee comfortingly. "Honey, you never need to worry about upsetting your father and I. You could do far worse things in life in than get pregnant sooner than you expect."

"Worse things? Like what?"

She sighed and thought about it for a moment. "You could implement the castes again. You could take away women's rights. Start another war with New Asia. Fire General Leger. Kick us out. Any of those things would make us disappointed. But we could never be angry with you."

"I guess now would be a bad time to say that I don't want you guys around?" I asked sarcastically, already feeling much lighter. "I don't understand how you couldn't be angry with me about this."

Mom laughed. "You will soon." She hesitated, thinking over her next words carefully. "Dad told you about his father, correct?" I nodded, a chill running up my spine just thinking about it. "He's spent his entire life as a father terrified of making even the slightest mistake and ruining his relationship with you all. I daresay that his role as a father scared him more than being a king or husband ever did. He loves you kids all the more because of it. He understands that you all make your own decisions and that he can't strong arm any of you into being absolutely obedient. Not without jeopardizing his relationship with you. He's a good man, your dad. And once the shock of being a grandfather before he turns forty wears off, he'll be over the moon for you."

"Sorry about that," I said, blushing.

"Forgetting to take your pill is normal," she said conspiratorially.

I raised my eyebrows at her. "Dr. Ashlar did mention that you had a habit of doing that. Tell me Mom, which one of us happened because of a busy week as queen?"

She blushed under my scrutiny and smiled wickedly. "You and Ahren," she admitted.

"Mom! That's a big oops!" I laughed, picturing the surprise she must have gotten by being pregnant and being pregnant with twins.

"It's not like we weren't discussing it already. We just hadn't decided that we were definitely trying. Osten was an accident too. Explains why he has such a special place in my heart. He was purely an 'oops' baby but all the more precious to us." She shook her head. "

"So let me get this straight," I said slowly. "Kaden was the only one you planned?"

She shrugged like it was no big deal. "Probably why he's the angel of the family. From the beginning he was doing everything right."

"Who knew that you two could run such a tight ship while ruling a whole country but that when it came to family planning, you were hopeless," I teased.

"It was one or the other. Besides, we wanted a big family." She put her arm around my shoulders and kissed my cheek. "I'll take care of your father. He takes these things better when it comes from me. He doesn't scare me."

I stood up and stretched, ready to go back to work for the afternoon. "Thanks Mom."

"Expect for him to look for you after I tell him though."

"Can't you tell him when I'm in France for New Year's?"

"That's three months from now!"

I pouted. "Mom, please…"

She considered, frowning. "I'm telling him this week."

"If you must," I sighed, letting her pull me close and kiss my forehead. I kicked my feet up onto the table in front of us and then noticed the newspapers sitting there. Mom, unlike Dad, avoided newspapers like the plague. She didn't want to know what the people were saying about her. She knew that while Dad had articles written about his excellence in diplomacy, articles written about her focused on her fashion and beauty. Now I could see the bold title of the front page announcing how her early resignation from the throne was due to her being unhealthy. "Mom, why are you reading this?"

"I like to be up-to-date on what my people are saying," she said, pursing her lips. "I was reading the paper while your father was gone and now I just can't seem to have stopped. He likes to keep this stuff hidden from me but it's hard to hide when there's some sort of public relations crisis going on."

"I don't know how you handle the scrutiny."

She pushed my hair over my shoulder in a comforting touch. "Honey, you've been dealing with it your whole life. You know how these things go. You just ignore it and tell yourself that you don't do anything in life for their approval but for yourself and for the love of people."

"But you didn't grow up with it."

"That's true, and I did prefer being in the background. It took some adjusting to but your father smoothed the transition. Quite frankly, we didn't have the time to worry about tabloids until after we had been married for a while and at that point we were confident enough in ourselves that we didn't care. Your little one will have no problem." She chuckled to herself. "Any child of yours will have no problem being in the spotlight, I'm sure. I daresay the only man on this earth in more danger of spoiling his children to death than your father is your husband."

I smiled and nodded in agreement. "Thanks Mom, for always being here."

"That's my job," she said, smiling. "Except for right now. Your father was begging for a date night with me during breakfast this morning."

"You barely spoke to each other during breakfast," I said. She and Dad were sitting at opposite ends of the table and Osten was being particularly hyperactive, demanding all of Dad's attention.

"We have our means of communicating." She smiled mischievously and rose to her feet. "Don't worry about coming to see me before the operation tomorrow morning. Get your rest and I'll see you in the evening when I'm awake." She kissed my forehead and then left me.

That night, I was crawling into bed where Eikko was already fast asleep. I yanked my dress off and left my silk slip on, not wanting to summon Eloise just to get me ready for bed. I curled up around Eikko and tucked my chin into his shoulder, breathing in the lingering scent of his cologne. "You 'kay?" he mumbled sleepily.

"I will be," I whispered softly before throwing my leg over his and falling right to sleep.


	17. Chapter 17

Neena couldn't have had better timing.

I was just getting to my office from breakfast when she emerged from a secret passage, a bag of goodies tucked under her arm. I sat down and started perusing my morning agenda when she spilled the contents of said bag onto my desk.

"Okay, ma'am. We have crackers, breath mints, seltzer water, and cinnamon gum," she said, listing off the items for me as she presented them. "Did I forget anything?"

"You did well, Neena. What would I do without you?"

"Promote Eloise," she said quickly, smiling. She put everything back in her bag and left it leaning against my desk as she went about organizing my office.

"Neena, believe me, Kile could care less how my study looks. Have you seen his room? Really, this place could be trashed and he wouldn't care either way. All he cares about is getting proper funding for his projects," I told her.

She pouted to me. "That had some bite to it, ma'am."

I sighed and rubbed my face. "I'm sorry. I can't control it," I groaned. "The advisers probably think that I've just turned into a complete sociopath lately."

"It will make sense to them once they hear you're pregnant," she assured me. "Speaking of, does Josie know yet? Because Kaden let it slip that you were off of fish for the time being and she was a little too curious."

"Dammit. I knew we had forgotten to tell someone." I waved my hand. "Don't tell Josie yet. Lord knows she'll keep it a secret for all of five seconds. Then the whole world will know and the world will not know until seven weeks from now when I'm fourteen weeks along and it's safe to tell everyone without them doing the math and figuring out that this baby was conceived pre-wedding."

"Of course, Your Majesty," Neena said, curtsying.

Brice came in, coffee mug in one hand and a stack of folders in the other. "We'll do the most exciting things first," she said by way of greeting. "Pictures from the Halloween ball need your approval as well as the article that will be released in Majesty Weekly." She placed a leather bound portfolio in front of me, right on top of my other work.

"Great," I said sarcastically. The Halloween ball almost felt like an afterthought with the wedding being only five weeks prior to it. The holiday also was mainly propagated in my family by Mom and Dad but with Mom recovering from heart surgery, they weren't taking part in the festivities this year. Eikko and I didn't dress in any costumes in particular; we simply wore formal wear that we would wear for any other ball. With everything going on lately, we didn't have the time to focus on costumes. It was surreal in a way. All night as we danced and mingled, we both shared secret smiles that communicated how excited we already were for the next year when we would be celebrating Halloween with our baby.

"Also, when you get the chance, your brother left a message for you."

"My brother? Which one?" I asked. Kaden had gone east to visit Uncle James and our cousins. It was a way of Mom and Dad lightening their load of responsibilities while Mom recovered.

"The prince consort," Brice answered. My smile fell. "He didn't say anything in his message except for wanting you to respond. I don't think he appreciates your isolation."

I nodded. "Of course he doesn't." I lifted my phone from its holder and dialed Ahren's number, doing the mental math of what time it was in France. It was hard for me to focus though as Eikko had just walked in, looking impossibly handsome in a navy suit. Brice took a post-it note and wrote Ahren's time on it for me. Unlike me, Eikko had no problem figuring out from the time that I was calling my twin.

"You've reached the desk of His Majesty Prince Ahren, how may I help you?" a woman asked in a heavy French accent. I was startled and double-checked that I had the right number. It was definitely his personal office line, the one I had called a dozen times already and had him answer immediately. Maybe he was in a meeting and was unable to answer his phone.

"This is Queen Eadlyn, Ahren's sister," I said slowly. "He said he wanted me to call him back."

"Of course, Your Majesty." There were a few beeps as she transferred me to another line. Eikko leaned against my desk beside me, his fingers brushing against mine.

"Hello?" Ahren answered breathlessly.

"You have a secretary now?" I asked him in a light voice, trying to start things off on a somewhat good note.

He sighed, sounding impatient. "We've been swamped by phone calls lately. Her job is solely to intercept anyone that gets my personal number and isn't on the list of people that security said are allowed to talk to me on this phone."

"Security? They're censoring your phone calls now? Tell me they're at least letting you eat. Or are you eating but sleeping in the stables?" I asked, smiling slightly at the image of my brother sleeping in a bed of hay.

Ahren wasn't laughing though. "We're at war, Eadlyn. We've had to change a few things."

"Right. Of course." I tried not to sound hurt but it was hard for me to not feel personally attacked in some way with the way he was talking to me. It was like he didn't even see me as his sister or best friend. I was just another annoying queen that he had to talk to while working.

"I called you earlier but you didn't answer."

"Well, it was probably when I was still asleep."

"What if it had been an emergency?"

I rolled my eyes. "Someone would have notified me if it was an emergency. Besides, if there was an emergency, would you have really called me personally?"

"Maybe." Both of us knew I was right. "Anyway, I called you this morning to speak to you about this war."

My heart constricted and my eyes flicked up to meet Eikko's. He frowned at my expression and knelt down beside me, leaning his head close to my shoulder so that he could hear Ahren. "What about the war?" I asked nonchalantly. Brice was tense as she stood across from me.

"The fact that the world's next major war is breaking out and you're ignoring it."

"I'm not ignoring the war, Ahren. I know it's going on. We discuss it several times a week."

"Really? And what could you possibly have to talk about in those meetings, Eadlyn? It's not like you're playing any part in the fighting. You're not involved at all."

"And we're staying that way," I said quickly. "We can't afford to get in a war right now." Eikko rubbed my shoulder sympathetically.

"Neither can France," Ahren reminded me.

I shrugged. "Maybe your wife should have thought about that before she declared war on one of her closest allies."

He gasped. It was a low blow, attacking Camille like that, but I wasn't wrong. She had made a bad call and was acting rashly, listening to her advisers without considering the consequences down the line of her actions. "We're doing the best we can," he said angrily. "We're struggling though. We need the assistance of our allies if we're going to survive this war."

"I can't help you, Ahren."

"Why not?"

"North Africa is an ally to Illéa, just like it was to France. We can't turn our backs on one ally. The effects would be just as detrimental to us as they are to France now."

"I'm your brother, Eadlyn."

I snapped. "It doesn't matter that you're my brother, Ahren, don't you see that? You're a king and that's all you are to me right now, at this moment. I can't tell you why we aren't picking sides but we just can't be involved in this. If you were really my brother, you would understand that." I genuinely couldn't tell him my reasoning behind this. Not only would the effects be disastrous for the economy and our global relationships, we couldn't afford to start a war when I would be having an heir soon. It wasn't safe for my health or the baby's for me to be engaging in a war. Unfortunately, I was bound by law to not share the news over the phone until it was public knowledge.

"If you were really my sister, you wouldn't leave me helpless here, Eads."

"Look, Ahren, I do care about you but right now, my country is more important. I need to think about the future of my country and my people and right now, there is just too much going on over here for us to lend a hand anywhere else."

There was a long pause but I could tell Ahren was fuming. "I don't get you, Eadlyn."

"What don't you get?" I fired back at him.

"You've turned into the queen that doesn't care about her family. There have been countless other families that had relatives as kings and queens throughout the world that they would have helped. Somehow, though, you've become the one that could care less. You're no better than Uncle Kota."

I sat back in my chair, my mind trying desperately to derive some other meaning of what he had just said. Eikko moved closer and put his arm around me as I started shivering. I wanted to break down and cry and apologize to Ahren for things I wasn't even sorry for. Anything to erase the last ten seconds. I couldn't do that though, not without going back in my resolve to remain neutral in this war. "You left us, remember? You abandoned your family and went off to marry your girlfriend without even considering us on the most important day of your life. If I were you, I wouldn't be judging others on their actions toward their families." With that, I slammed the phone back onto its holder.

My study fell into a stunned silence as everyone just stood and stared at me, waiting for me to act. "Eadlyn…" Eikko whispered but he was at a loss for words. After all, they had just witnessed possibly the greatest fallout amongst relatives since the day that Dad and August Illéa had their blow up.

"Don't you all have work to do?" I asked everyone in a placid voice, keeping my eyes trained on my desk as they all snapped to attention and went about their daily tasks.

Eikko didn't move though. "Eadlyn, look, I know that sometimes it's tough, having to deal with siblings that you don't always agree with. It's hard to know that they don't need you anymore. Maybe that's why—"

"Eikko, I really don't care about whatever shrink-type words of comfort you have for me concerning your relationship with your sister," I said quickly, knowing where we was going with his speech. "She's not a queen and you're not a king. It's different."

He bowed his head, darkness flickering in his eyes. "I'm not a king?" he asked in a tense but sad voice.

I sighed. "I didn't mean it like that. It came out wrong. Of course you're a king, you're just not…" I didn't have any way of salvaging this conversation. I had dug a hole for myself and I was stuck.

"I'm not _the_ king, right?" He stood and walked to my doors, letting himself out of my office. "Well, if you happen to have any work for your lowly peasant of a husband to do, let me know. Otherwise, I'll be in the stables working with the rest of the servants." The door slammed shut behind him.

It felt like there wasn't enough air in the room. Everything had escalated so quickly. First Ahren, then Eikko. All of the most important men in my life were leaving and suddenly I wasn't sure if being queen was worth all of this trouble. What good was it, being queen, when I didn't have family or loved ones to support me? And not only support me, but to have people to run to when things got hard. To have people whom I could depend upon while they leaned on me.

My fingers brushed against my dress, just below my navel. My baby that was no bigger than a blueberry, already destined to inheriting the very throne where I sat. Would the country be better when I left the throne than it had been when I arrived? I couldn't be sure of that anymore. All I knew was that I wanted Illéa to not only still be standing but be standing tall and proud when my baby became the ruler. And I wanted he or she to be surrounded by family at all times to ease the burden of ruling. I never wanted them to be alone.

Eikko hadn't made it very far down the hallway when I stuck my head out of my office door. In fact, he was standing at the end of the corridor, speaking with Brice. As I approached them, Brice nodded to me to signal that they weren't alone anymore. Eikko turned and pursed his lips when his eyes fell on me. "Brice, could you give us a moment?" I asked politely. She curtsied and continued on her way to a conference room. I faced my husband, heart pounding in my chest. We hadn't fought like this before. It was bound to happen eventually but it didn't stop me from being terrified. "I'm really good at hurting the people I love, in case you couldn't tell."

"I can tell," he said in a cool voice.

"But I'm even better at pretending I don't care about them. It's probably one of my biggest flaws. Because I'm a queen. If I care too much, I can't lead. I can't decide which province is getting tax increases and who will have to go without food or clean water because we don't have the budget to sustain them…not if I'm a queen with a heart. But if I'm heartless, then I can't be a wife or daughter or sister or a mother," I said tentatively, looking around to make sure we wouldn't be overheard.

"Eadlyn." Eikko stepped closer to me and put his hands securely on my shoulders so that I had no choice but to stare right at him. "You can have a heart and still be a great queen.

I chewed on my lip. "Ahren said that to me."

"Well, he's a smart guy. What he said to you is wrong. though You know that if he had the whole story, he would understand why you can't get involved in this war."

"But what if we have to, Eikko? What if we are eventually forced to?"

"The only way that will happen is if we get attacked in some way, which General Leger won't let a fly into this palace if it's up to him. So why don't we worry about that when the time comes, okay? You worry enough as it is. Let's worry about things that we can actually deal with." He tucked my hair behind my ear and kissed my forehead tenderly. I leaned forward into his arms and rested my head over his heart. "And Eadlyn?"

"Hm?"

"Don't ever think that I'm below you again."

I laughed and leaned up to kiss him below his chin. "Got it."

I hadn't seen or heard from Kile since my trip to Panama and it was impossibly satisfying to have him under my roof again. In the last two months since the hurricane, Kile had made major progress in his new housing project – with Alice's help, of course. Now was the time for us to decide whether to continue funding him or to send him back to Bonita. Just judging from his stiff posture when he greeted me, I knew that neither of us was looking forward to this conversation.

In an effort to make things less formal though, I decided to meet him in the gardens and discuss things as we walked around. It had been a while since I had last walked around the gardens, months probably. I just didn't have the time to enjoy the outdoors unless it was for a meeting. Dr. Ashlar had stressed to me though that it would not be beneficial for me to remain static behind a desk while pregnant so I figured that walks around the gardens would have to become a necessary part of my daily routine.

"So how are you feeling about the progress you've made in Panama?" I asked him as we entered the hedge maze. I knew the maze by heart, as did he, and we didn't really need to pay attention to make it out safely.

"Hopeful. We've constructed thirteen homes from the ground up and two apartment buildings are still underway," he reported.

"And how is Alice's work coming along?"

His eyebrows pinched together. "Fine."

"Fine?" I repeated. "What about the people who don't have permanent housing yet? Her organization is still there supplying for them, correct?"

"Oh, yeah. She's there."

"Okay," I said slowly, trying to gauge his strange behavior. "So what do you need from us?"

Kile stopped walking and faced me. "That's just it. I really don't need anything as long as you keep me in Panama. However, I really think that Dominica could use my help. Their housing isn't much better off. If an earthquake were to strike there, they would have no help."

I held up a hand to stop him. "Kile, wait. Dominica isn't even in the top ten for impoverished provinces. It's mostly senior citizens and sailors. Even then, the sailors are seasonal residents so yes, damage costs would be high but they wouldn't be in the streets." Kile looked crestfallen. "And it's not like these people are in the streets to begin with, not like in Bonita. Earthquakes are rare in Dominica. I'm not saying that they don't happen but they are rather infrequent."

"I just really feel led to help the people there. I've met some people in Panama that have expressed their concerns—"

"Are any of those people funding you?" I asked him quickly.

"No, but I feel that since you banished me, I should at least have a little bit of say in where I go."

"It's just the opposite actually. I banished you to work for me. I supply you, you go where I tell you. It's that simple. You either choose Bonita or Panama but those are our two focuses right now."

He clenched his jaw and shook his head, clearly frustrated. "I'm trying to make your country a better place, Eadlyn. Don't you want me to help you?"

"Yes, but I have a plan for how you can help me. We have a budget and a schedule and half a dozen other factors to consider before you just spring a new idea on me."

"So I don't get any say in where I go or what I do? Am I your friend or your slave?"

Our voices had been rising steadily but I only had just noticed that we were close to shouting. I bowed my head, thinking of my argument that morning with Ahren. "Kile, I really can't stand to lose a relationship with another friend now. Please, just do me this one favor and choose either Bonita or Panama. Maybe, seeing how things unfold in Europe and our position in the war, we can revisit the topic of you moving to Dominica next year."

"Next year?" he repeated in shock. "That's next year."

"That's my best offer."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I feel established in Panama. It would be nice to have some continuity by working there longer but at the same time, if you need me in Bonita, I could get people started there and travel between the two. What do the finances look like?"

"Technically, staying in Panama wouldn't change anything. We've been moving money from your Bonita budget and using it to supply you in Panama. If you work in both Bonita and Panama, you'll risk being slowed because your budgets will be stretched more."

The wheels were clearly spinning in his head as he considered his options. "I'll stay in Panama, then. Who knows? Maybe I can find some tourist tycoon to sponsor me and give me a boost in budget." He gave me a small smile, clearly resigning himself to the fact that he was stuck in Panama for the immediate future.

We resumed our path around the gardens, my arm tucked in his, just enjoying the fresh air and noon sun when I finally decided to ask, "Your sudden interest in Dominica wouldn't have anything to do with Alice moving there, would it?"

"How do you know about that?" he asked, not denying or confirming it.

"I've been intrigued by her organization lately. I'm considering offering her the grant at the end of the year for exceptional entrepreneurship and development so I have been doing some research." Kile gave me a pointed look. "Okay, Neena has been doing research but she gives me the highlights."

"She's only going there for a few weeks anyway to help at a medical facility opening on the south coast. I don't know what I could do in that short amount of time."

"So you two are…"

He shook his head quickly. "No. We're not anything. Not officially, anyway. We haven't even kissed. I told her that I needed my space before I could get into another relationship and she respects that. After all, she is older and her aunt is an Elite. I'm sure she's heard stories. What's going on between you and Ahren?"

"Who said it was Ahren?"

"Eadlyn, I've known you your life. I know what it looks like when you and Ahren fight."

I shrugged. "We're just having a hard time separating family and state. Obviously I want the very best for him but at the same time, we can't afford to get into a war right now."

"Why not? I mean, I know that wars aren't something you just get into because you're bored but what is really stopping you?"

I looked around us, making sure we were alone. I could tell Kile. I could be completely honest with him but I wasn't sure if telling him that I'm pregnant so soon would just hurt him. After all, we were making out in his room only six months prior. It felt like ages but to him it had to still be fresh in his mind. Then again, Kile had been a confidante to me in the last few weeks of my Selection and I desperately needed a confidante that I wasn't married and related to. "Well, we're just saving up for a big project."

"A big project? That's a little vague. What's so big that you need to save so much?"

I took a deep breath. "An heir."

"An heir? You're already talking about that? Why could you possibly be talking about it so…" His eyes lit up with recognition. "Oh. Well then."

"Children are expensive, even for kings and queens. Security details, party funds, materials for possibly renovating for a new nursery, maybe even a Selection fund," I said, cringing slightly at the thought.

"You would make your son or daughter have a Selection?"

I shrugged. "I was skeptical at first too but now, I can't deny its success."

"You didn't even pick a Selected," he said, smiling slightly.

"But I wouldn't have met him without the Selection," I reminded him. "It's a secret, obviously."

"Obviously. When are you telling the public?"

"Around Christmas, when I'm fifteen weeks or so."

Kile's eyes widened and he started laughing. "Eadlyn Schreave, do you mean to tell me that you're lying to the public about how far along you are?" My jaw dropped but that was all the answer Kile needed. "You're in trouble if anyone ever finds out!"

"And no one will find out," I said pointedly, giving him a look that made it clear that he would die if he leaked the news to anyone.

"Of course not. Better check the hedges though for bugs. Who knows who Marid has working on the inside here." All humor left the conversation right at the moment as we both considered the enemy that was still lurking somewhere out there, holding a lot of confidential information. "What do you think he has?"

"What do you mean?"

"He's not staying quiet because he has nothing to say. He's quiet because he's waiting for the perfect time to spill something big. I just can't imagine what all he could have heard in that week or so that he could easily use against you."

I wrapped my arms around myself, suddenly shivering. It wasn't from being cold though. "He had a microphone in the queen's study. It could be anything, honestly."

"Are you any closer to finding him?"

I shook my head. "General Leger is determined but the guy is a ghost. I'm sure his parents are using their contacts to help hide him but there's still no telling where he could be. He's officially off the grid."

"Until he reveals what kind of dirt he has on you."

"True. But maybe that's why he's waiting."

"I hope you catch him, Eadlyn, before he can do any real damage."

"Me too, Kile. Me too."


	18. Chapter 18

Eikko hadn't been sleeping well lately. It wasn't anything new – he went through phases where he didn't sleep and they would pass within two weeks. It had been a month though. A month where almost every night he would wake up with a nightmare and he tried to hide it from me but each time he woke up, he would either leave our bed or hold me as close as possible. The nightmares started a week or so after we found out that I was pregnant and they seemed to be lingering. He really tried to hide it but he was clearly struggling. He was quieter and more resigned. He barely made it through the Halloween ball – the day after, he stayed in his office all day and refused to take any meetings. I waited for him to open up to me but he stayed silent.

On one morning in particular, I could tell that he hadn't stayed in bed because when I woke up he was next to me with his shoes on under his pajama pants. "Good morning," I moaned, curling up on my side. I did a quick self-assessment and found that for the second morning that week, I didn't wake up with my stomach in knots. Mom told me that my morning sickness would start to wane as I got closer to my second trimester, which seemed to be holding true since I was eleven weeks along and already seeing a decrease in my nausea. It was just terrifying to think that I was already approaching my second trimester, the small bump that was starting to form only making it scarier. We couldn't hide this forever.

"Good morning," Eikko said dully, not looking at me. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine. What about you? Where've you been this morning?"

He shrugged. "Just took a walk through the gardens."

I huffed. Clearly he wasn't going to offer me anymore of an answer than that. "Okay. You're going to need to tell me what's bothering you at some point. Otherwise, I'm just going to assume that you're purposely keeping secrets."

"I'm not purposely keeping secrets from you, Eadlyn. It's just something that you don't need to be bothered with."

"Maybe, except we're married. Your problems are my problems, remember?"

"You shouldn't stress too much with the baby," he fought, his fingers just barely ghosting over my hip.

I rolled my eyes. "Believe me, Neena and Brice are watching me like a hawk to make sure that I'm not stressing. For once, I think I've been getting more sleep than them. That's excluding my afternoon naps."

Eikko smiled appreciatively. "You really want to know? I don't want to upset you."

"You're not part vampire, are you?"

His smile grew as he slid an envelope from the drawer in his bedside table. The front of it simply had the address for his personal mail and his name, _Eikko Koshinen_ , scrawled in classic cursive. "What is this?" I asked, balancing it in my hands.

"Open it," he said, not looking at me. "Read it."

I slid the flap open and withdrew a folded piece of lined paper. The handwriting on the paper matched the handwriting on the envelope. " _Poikani_ ," I began, stammering slightly with the Finnish. I squinted at the word, trying to remember some of the Finnish Eikko had drilled into me over the last several months. "My son? This is from your parents?"

"My mother," he clarified.

"When did you get it?"

"A few weeks ago." He shifted so that he faced me. "It really isn't anything so special. There really wasn't anything warm or comforting in it. Really, all she talked about was the business and how my sister is doing and that she and Dad are set to leave in July."

I raised my eyebrows. "July? That's good though. Maybe you can reconcile with them before they leave. That's a long time from now." He frowned. "Do you want to reconcile with them?" I asked him.

He shrugged. "I don't know. They're my parents, they always will be, but my life feels so complete here that it wouldn't be so bad—"

"Eikko, stop." I paused and he waited for me to continue. "You're right, they're your parents. Do you know how long I can let my parents be mad at me? Maybe an hour. You are their son, their only son. This is the first time she's contacted you, right?" He nodded. "It's obviously an olive branch."

"Or an attempt to make nice because I'm the king of Illéa," he offered.

I rolled my eyes. "I doubt that's it. They hate me because I'm queen, remember?"

"They hate you because they're hard-working people who don't believe that you do anything of merit each day," he corrected. "I'm just not interested in an olive branch right now, okay?"

I could have come up with dozens of reasons for why an olive branch would be ideal, starting with the fact that he was about to have a baby and keeping his child from its grandparents would only be cruel. He was set though and arguing with him would only make him more worried and stressed about it. I had to let this one go and support him. I offered an olive branch of my own by setting the letter aside, throwing my legs over his, and positioning myself in his lap.

His fingers skimmed down over my belly, the bump slightly more pronounced with me slouching over, and he smiled slightly. "I can't believe your dad hasn't said anything to you yet."

I flinched. "He's said enough with his silence."

"He's not angry," Eikko told me.

"How do you know?"

"Because he talked to me."

My head snapped up and I met his gaze. "No he didn't."

"He did," he said with an amused smile. "Made sure to tell me that we were lucky that it happened so close to our wedding and that we deserve to have a baby so soon since we were fooling around."

"He told you that?" I asked, still in disbelief.

"Eadlyn, you really think he's going to talk to you about your lack of responsibility in your sex life? With you, you're still his little girl. With me, he can be the protective father." He paused. "He's not disappointed though."

"How are you so sure? He'll barely look at me at breakfast or dinner, he's maybe spoken ten words to me since Mom said she told him."

He smiled slightly. "He asks me about how you're doing. He makes sure I'm taking care of you, which is sweet in a way. Maybe he's just uncomfortable with the fact that you are still very much his little girl and you're about to become a mom. He's in shock, I think, but he does ask me how you've been feeling and we've started thinking about nursery ideas."

I shook my head and settled into his arms a bit more. "We really do have some good parental issues between us, don't we?"

"He'll come around," he assured me, kissing my forehead. "Now, I need to get you two fed so let's get dressed, alright?"

"Oh, yes, let's get dressed!" I said with mock enthusiasm. Getting dressed had become my least favorite part of my day.

I had definitely gained weight and was starting to need maternity clothes but the ones Eloise had ordered to bring to the palace all made me look frumpy and heavier than I really was. None of them were really good at hiding the fact that I was pregnant – they all seemed to showcase it. I had never considered designing clothes for pregnancy and didn't really know where to start. Luckily, I had found a prodigy in my maid.

Eloise presented me with a pair of jeans altered with a small band of elastic on both sides of the hip that were fashionable and wouldn't make it obvious that I was wearing maternity clothes. "How'd you think of this?" I asked, running my hands over the denim. I hadn't worn jeans in almost two weeks because they didn't fit. I actually cried on the day that I couldn't button them.

"I spoke with your mother and Miss Marlee, as well as some of the older maids that served your mother when she was pregnant. You know how fond of jeans your mother is," she said, her eyes sparkling knowingly.

I laughed and nodded. Mom wore jeans every Saturday and any other day she didn't have to attend to her responsibilities in meeting with foreign dignitaries. "You're a genius, Eloise," I gushed. I slipped them on, admiring how comfortably they were and just how wonderful it felt to be wearing jeans again instead of dress pants or loose dresses.

"Ma'am, may I remind you that you do have a meeting with your advisers today," she said, subtly informing me that I couldn't wear jeans. Except I was Eadlyn Schreave de Koshinen.

"The advisers will just have to see me in jeans today. Perhaps it's time they learn that a queen can wear jeans and still be a queen." Eloise shook her head but ventured further into my closet anyway, retrieving a loose blouse and blazer.

Breakfast was a quiet affair, with Dad chewing pensively on his omelet as he read over the morning headlines. Eikko offered me a small smile as I took my seat beside him in front of my full plate. Unlike everyone else at the table, my breakfasts were prepared especially for me since the palace chef was officially in charge of my diet. Breakfast always felt like a strange kind of limbo for the day. It was early enough in the day that we only had the headlines from news the night before. Twelve hours was a long time and Illéa was a big country. A lot could happen. I at least would be somewhat comforted if we hadn't been woken up in the middle of the night by some urgent matter. A full, uninterrupted night was an accomplishment and I secretly applauded my people for keeping it together long enough for me to sleep.

Kaden joined us, dressed in his hunting clothes. Osten was being obnoxious, drawing pictures in his leftover syrup to show Mom proudly. "Osten, eat your food," she admonished but she was smiling as she said it.

"Kaden, are you looking for a hunting partner today?" Dad asked.

His eyes lit up. "Really?"

"Can I come?" Mom chimed in. "You said yourself, I'm an excellent shot."

Dad shook his head. "My dear, you are a fantastic shot but I don't think Dr. Cleary would be too fond of you riding through the grounds with a gun on your back just a few weeks after heart surgery." Mom pouted slightly, prompting Dad to continue, "Don't worry, we'll find something to occupy your time." I looked down at my plate but not before seeing Dad tug on his ear slightly.

I arrived in my office with a light itinerary waiting for me on my desk, showing that I had some breaks here and there and an entire two-hour window around lunchtime that I could work on whatever I wanted. Brice came in, looking exhausted. "Not sleep well last night?" I asked her.

"I slept in and the coffee hasn't set in yet," she answered. "I don't even know what the morning news hour has to report. It seems I've failed you." She sat by the computer in the corner of the study, perusing the morning news that way.

"Brice, you wouldn't be deloading my schedule, would you?"

She looked at me with wide, innocent eyes. "What do you mean?"

"Just, over the last few weeks, my schedule has been significantly lighter and I know for a fact that the last few months of the year are the busiest. You're not keeping my schedule light because I'm pregnant, are you?"

"Absolutely not," she said but she nodded as she said it.

"Oh." I slid down in my seat. "It seems silly really. I feel fine and I don't need you all doing extra work for me just so that I can sleep more. Besides, I want to work extra had now so that I can have a more worry-free maternity leave—"

"Oh my god," Brice whispered, her eyes glued to the computer screen. I stared at her, waiting for her to elaborate but she was sitting stock-still. A few moments passed before she suddenly sprung from her seat. "Turn the TV on. I'll call the advisers," she said urgently as she walked to my desk and picked up my phone.

"Why? What's going on?"

"We know what Marid was waiting to spill," she said shortly, phone pressed to her ear. "He save it for the morning news. Yes, Marlee," she answered as someone picked up the phone on the other line. "Can you send American and Maxon up here? They need to be here _now_."

I walked over to the TV and turned it on, holding my breath as I waited for it to load. I tried to process things quickly as I finally got to the image of a news anchor and headlines scrawling beneath her. _Selection affair exposed_ read angrily next to the news station logo. My heart clenched. Ean and Hale…Marid found out about it. But it didn't add up. They were showing pictures of Mom and Dad. Old pictures of Mom and Dad. Pictures that had to have been from his Selection because Mom wasn't wearing a crown or tiara in any of them.

"Turn the volume on," Brice said. I reached for the remote and took it off of mute as General Leger entered, his face full of fear.

"…a transcript of King Maxon speaking with another man in the palace who allegedly had a secret relationship with Queen America during King Maxon's Selection. Again, we'll play the shocking recording here," the news anchor said.

General Leger groaned and rubbed his face with his hand as his voice played over the TV. " _There are worse things that could happen beside her marrying her translator, you know_ ," he had said. The words being spoken scrawled across the screen, just to ensure that people would get the picture.

" _I'm not upset about that. It's what could have happened if anyone found out that they had been sneaking around,_ " a new voice answered. Dad's voice.

" _That is true_ ," General Leger agreed. _"But there are worse things than that as well. At least they're getting married, as opposed to if they had just been sneaking around. And my, it could have been one of her men sneaking around with someone else in the palace. That would be a disaster._ "

" _You wouldn't be talking about the time that you were a guard and had dates with America during my Selection, would you?_ " Dad had asked but there was a smile in his voice. I drew in a breath and spun to look at General Leger. He wasn't meeting anyone's eyes though. The doors to the study opened again and Mom and Dad entered.

The recording was still going. " _I never did truly thank you for pardoning me_."

In what I assumed was the worst part of the conversation, the recording cut out and the news anchor was back on screen. "There you have it folks. An official leak describing what seems to be an affair that occurred between our own Queen America and a guard in the palace, during King Maxon's Selection. An unnamed source has confirmed that the guard in question is General Aspen Leger, who has – get this – worked closely with the royal family as a personal guard for the last twenty years." They showed the picture from my coronation day that was of me and the Legers, focusing in on General Leger and his proximity to me.

As if things couldn't get any worse, the news anchor went on. "Here with us to discuss this latest news is Baden Trains, one of the Selected from Queen Eadlyn's Selection. Baden, you've spoken to the press before about the royal family but you only spoke of Queen Eadlyn. Is this news surprising to you at all?"

The camera switched angles to reveal Baden sitting at the desk next to the news anchor. "I can't say I am surprised by this news. Now, I'm not royalty and I wasn't raised in a royal family, Allyna, but I can say that our royal family's behavior behind the scenes is anything but normal."

"Why do you say that?" Allyna asked, leaning in with curiosity.

"First off, this General Leger guy is constantly around. If Queen America was in the room, he was there with her—"

"He was only here for what, five minutes?" I exclaimed.

Eikko entered then, the news of this finally reaching him. Advisers trickled in behind him. Raelynn and George followed, both looking ready to tackle the biggest scandal to hit the royal family since…well, ever.

Baden was still talking in the background. "—is only strange, if not inappropriate. One of the other guys told me that one night, all of the kids slept in a bed together. Eadlyn and her four brothers, one bed. I wouldn't be surprised if her parents were there too. All of them are weirdly close. And as for this General Leger character? He probably is just a third person for King Maxon and Queen America to have fun with. Seriously, who does Eadlyn resemble more? King Maxon or this baboon?"

"Are you insinuating that Eadlyn Schreave is not the daughter of King Maxon, therefore not the rightful heir to the throne?" Allyna asked, practically falling out of her chair with excitement.

Baden nodded and gave the camera a slight smile. "That's exactly what I'm insinuating. Why else do you think he's around all the time?"

"That's bullshit!" Brice yelled, pointing at the TV. "Who's going to believe that? Eadlyn is a twin and her twin brother just so happens to be the spitting image of his father."

Mom had her hands clutched closely to her chest, her eyes meeting mine with horror. Anger burned in my chest, forcing me to look away from her. Somewhere in all of the madness, Kaden had slipped into my study and he left Josie's side to turn the TV off suddenly. "We don't need to watch that anymore. Now we need to get a plan together," he said decisively.

There was a beat of silence and then George was ordering for everyone to get to the conference room down the hall where we would assemble a team for damage control and maybe get a handle on this story. Advisers trickled out again, talking loudly and trying to come up with ideas of how to spin the scandal. Eventually it was just myself, Eikko, Mom, Dad, Kaden, and General Leger left.

Mom's shoulders were shaking and I could see that she was seconds from bursting into tears. After all, she had just watched her reputation get blown to bits on live television. And not just her reputation but also our whole family's reputation. Dad put an arm around Mom's shoulders and addressed General Leger. "Call Lucy. You should warn her about this. I want you both staying at the palace until all of this gets smoothed over." General Leger nodded and left abruptly, seeming to be thankful for the excuse to leave.

Mom's eyes met mine again. "Eadlyn, I'm sorry."

"You didn't care to tell me that it was General Leger?" I asked her. "He's been a second father to me this whole time and you didn't think it was important for me to know that he's your ex?"

"It was complicated," she tried to explain.

"No, what's complicated is trying to understand all of these secrets you two have kept from me for my entire life. First with Brice and now with General Leger? How many people who work for you are you either related to or have had a relationship with in the past? Ugh, don't even answer that question. I don't want to know," I snapped.

Dad's eyes were apologetic. "Eadlyn, we were trying to protect you."

"I don't need protection!" I yelled, the ferocity of my voice surprising even me. "I'm the queen of Illéa and I am sick and tired of people trying to keep me safe. I'm not supposed to be safe. That's why our approval ratings have been down and why I'm trying so goddamn hard to improve this country. Illéa was built on lies and deceit and I'll be damned if it keeps going that way anymore."

Eikko placed his hand on my shoulder but I shook it off. I turned on my heel and exited my study, heading towards the conference room to reign over my people.


	19. Chapter 19

Dinner had come and gone and we were still doing damage control for the discovery of General Leger having a secret relationship with Mom. My mom. And General Leger. I was dizzy just thinking about the fact that she and General Leger dated. Of course I knew that he was from Carolina and that they knew each other before she entered the Selection. In truth, I felt a bit like an idiot for not putting it together when she told me that she had been in a relationship prior to the Selection. It didn't change anything though. She should have told me sooner that she used to date the man that I looked to as a second father.

Brice had any meetings that could be pushed back get delayed a few days and then pushed all of our more pressing things on to some of our advisers so that we could focus our energy on damage control. Palace secretaries were on their phones, speaking with reporters and journalists and repeating the same statement Georgean had provided them: "The palace is aware of the situation and the king and queen will make a public statement this evening."

Mom and Dad were quickly whisked away with George and Raelynn and there were whispers of Gavril possibly coming to the palace, seeing as this was a public relations disaster and he had handled a few of those in his lifetime of work at the palace. Unfortunately, Gavril was in Europe on vacation and no one had been able to reach him.

I stayed far away from the studio as Mom and Dad got ready to make their statement. Brice admonished me for choosing not to be supportive of my parents in such a difficult time but I couldn't reconcile their troubles with the fact that they had lied to me for over eighteen years about their relationship with General Leger. I stood in the conference room, trying to eat my whole thumbnail as an adviser did an introduction on screen for my parents.

"You should get to bed soon," Eikko said gently to me.

"I'm fine," I insisted, not meeting his eyes or even looking in his direction.

"Eadlyn, you need rest. You barely touched your lunch or dinner—"

"I've been busy." He sighed but he knew better than to argue with me when I was acting to snappy. His only response was to go pour himself another cup of coffee, a sure sign of surrender to the fact that we would be up well into the night working on our plan of response.

Kaden joined me in front of the television, looking a bit too much like Dad with the worry lines in his forehead. "I can't believe this, Eads."

"I know."

"Did you have any idea?" he asked quietly. I shook my head. "I always thought that he was strangely close to them. But maybe that's just me imparting retrospective wisdom."

My head swam at his words, not being able to keep up with such sophisticated language with such little sleep in me. "Doesn't matter. We know now."

"Ahren called. Apparently it headlined their afternoon news. He found out the same way as us."

I rolled my eyes. "That really doesn't make me feel any better about being lied to."

Kaden nodded. "Yeah, me neither."

The door burst open, making all of us jump. We didn't have time to react much further though because Gavril was yelling, "Get the king and queen out of the studio _immediately_!" No one moved, too stunned to see our long lost PR-extraordinaire in the room. "Did you hear me? If you want to save the family from this mess, you will get them off of TV right now."

A guard – one of the guards who worked closest with General Leger – called into his radio and relayed Gavril's message to the guards downstairs in the studio. We watched the television in anticipation to see if the message would be conveyed in time. Sure enough, the adviser speaking on screen segued smoothly into another matter of state and glossed over Mom and Dad's appearance completely.

Gavril nodded in approval and shrugged out of his jacket. He rolled up his sleeves as he asked, "So what do we have?"

"We were planning on having the queen explain the entire situation," one of the secretaries stammered.

"So you're back to square one, now that they're not doing that?" Gavril clarified.

"Yes, sir."

He nodded and took a seat at the head of the table, in total command of the room. "Can anyone tell me why we're not having Queen America explain her actions on live television?" he asked, folding his hands in front of him casually as if he was waiting for the weather report.

"Um, because it would be admitting to treason?" one of the younger secretaries guessed. "And she's queen so she can't exactly admit to treason?"

Gavril raised his eyebrows. "You're not wrong. That would be very bad, indeed. At this point though, there's really nothing that the people can do about a queen's history with treason. Not when she's been married to the king for over two decades. No, we're not having her tell her story on live television because that would be admitting defeat."

"With all respect, sir," the secretary said, "the evidence is pretty damning. I'm not sure there is a way to recover from this one without releasing an official statement defending her actions."

"But there is," Gavril said, standing up again and going to a whiteboard. He erased all of the notes they had written on there throughout the day and uncapped a purple marker – his go-to marker color. The doors swung open again and Mom and Dad joined us. "Ah, welcome. Lots of people are talking about you two," he said conversationally.

"Gavril," Mom breathed out, putting a hand over her heart. Dad's arm was wound tightly around her waist, as tight as it could be without him actually carrying her. "How did you know to come?"

"I saw the news as I was sitting down for my wine tasting with the Italian ambassador. Luckily, he was not too heartbroken to hear that I needed to go rescue my favorite monarchs immediately. No offense, Queen Eadlyn." I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "He's a fine gentleman, that ambassador. His vineyard is marvelous. Anyway, back to the matter at hand, we are not having the king or queen admit to anything. In fact, the best way to get past this is to show that the palace is unfazed by this news. It's not the first time the palace has withheld information from the public – they'll get over it eventually."

"A distraction?" Raelynn repeated. "It would have to a hell of a distraction to take away from King Maxon and Queen America. They are two of the most popular monarchs to ever live – a possible cheating scandal is pretty big."

"Not as big as an heir," I said under my breath so that only Eikko heard me.

He looked down at me, aggression in his eyes. "Eadlyn, no."

"It's a big deal," I insisted.

" _No_. We're not using this as a ploy to ease some scandal. I refuse to use this like a chess piece," he growled back, his jaw clenched in determination. "Besides, it's too early. You know the plan."

I shook my head. "Plans sometimes get rearranged." I met Dad's eyes and I could see disapproval there too. Mom looked like she just wanted any excuse to leave the room. A silent war began between myself and my parents. Once I told the advisers that I was pregnant, there would be no going back. I would have to announce it to the country. Too many people would know and we could never keep it a secret if the advisers knew. At the end of the day, I was the one with child so I was the one could call the shots. I took a deep breath and shut Eikko out, not even facing him in the slightest. "I'm pregnant."

Gasps could be heard around the room as Eikko released a breath in frustration. Dad shook his head and looked down at his feet. Brice nodded to herself, seeming to resign herself to this new turn in events and how things would be playing out.

Since no one was moving, I repeated, "I'm pregnant with the next heir of Illéa. What now?" There certainly needed to be some time to absorb this development but time wasn't something we had a lot of.

"How far along are you?" Gavril asked placidly, trying not to smile.

I halted. Maybe Eikko was right about needing to discuss plans before acting rashly. Luckily, Brice was there to rescue me. "Nine weeks," she lied. I thanked my lucky stars that my blazer covered my midsection well enough because my bump would definitely be noticeable to anyone scrutinizing me closely. This was going to be the worst kept secret in the world. There was no way that anyone would believe that I was only nine weeks or ten weeks along if I was already showing clearly.

"It's not…horribly early to tell the people," Georgean said slowly.

"It still seems too early to say that it's a coincidence for us to announce it," Gavril argued. "Can't we lie and say she's eleven weeks?" Right, lie about the lie meant to cover up the truth. That made total sense.

"She's only been married ten weeks," said a secretary who was bent over a calendar, apparently counting the weeks since my wedding day. I rolled my eyes. "Unless you want an even bigger scandal, she has to be nine weeks along at the most."

"The public will be suspicious enough with how close to her wedding the conception is," Georgean agreed.

Dad huffed. "Enough! What's the matter with her being more than nine weeks along? She married Eikko and he is the father of the baby. Kings used to have illegitimate children all the time as heirs. What's the big deal now?" he asked the room angrily. I was taken aback by him sticking up for me. It had been radio silence from him since Mom told him that I was pregnant and now he was defending me?

Brice was the only one to challenge him. "Maxon, we _can't_ let illegitimate children pass. Not right now." There was something meaningful in her gaze as she stared him down, her warm blue eyes meeting his warm brown eyes. "If we legitimize children born outside of wedded monarchs, it opens the doors for the Illéas to come in and stake their claim for the crown," she elaborated.

"Do we have a lead on Marid?" Gavril asked, looking to General Leger. An uncomfortable silence fell over the room as everyone noticed for the first time that the man of the hour happened to be in the room.

General Leger lifted his chin. "No. We're interviewing the news station that first broke the story to get info on how they got it. We sent the local law enforcement a notice that he's wanted by the queen and king."

"Why can't we expose him?" Kaden asked, bouncing on his toes. Every inch of him seemed tense and ready to spring at someone.

"Exposing him will only turn more people against us," Gavril answered. "He's always advocated for transparency from the throne. Even if we announce to the people that he's behind this leak, people will take his side because it's only further supporting him."

"He's a genius," General Leger mumbled.

Dad sighed. "Just like his father."

"We might have to announce the pregnancy," Gavril said slowly. "We don't have any other options. Not only do we need a big distraction, we need a big distraction that will sway the people, get them back on your side. Only an heir can accomplish that." He faced Eikko and me. "Can you two be in the studio tomorrow morning?"

"Yes," I answered quickly so that Eikko couldn't say anything.

"Good. I'll conduct the interview since the people love me. Your Majesties," he said, facing Mom and Dad, "you'll need to be there as well to show your support."

"Of course," Mom said softly. She looked at ruefully but I quickly turned away.

Gavril took a deep breath. "Anyone with a royal title should be off to bed so that you all are well rested and don't look like zombies in the morning."

I was hoping to be up all night simply to avoid having to be alone in a room with Eikko. I knew that we weren't about to have a pretty conversation. Kaden couldn't seem to get out of there fast enough. Dad placed his hand on my shoulder and walked me out of the conference room. As we left, General Leger seemed to be fighting the urge to say something to Mom but his survival instincts probably told him to hold back.

Eikko shut the door softly behind us. I sat down on the edge of our bed, my back to him, waiting for him to speak. He was making me wait though. He went to his closet and changed and did his full nighttime routine before rejoining me in our bedroom.

"It was our secret," he said in a quiet, angry voice.

"I know," I whispered back.

"It was _our_ news to share with people. It is our news to be happy about and to share with the country when we were ready. What about our friends, Eadlyn? Are we just going to let them find out tomorrow morning as they're eating breakfast—"

I stood up and faced him. "What was I supposed to do? I'm doing this to protect our baby so that they don't become ruler of a nation who thinks their ancestors are all infidels."

"You made that decision on your own! It's my baby too, Eadlyn. You don't get to make those decisions by yourself."

"I was being a queen, not a mother," I snarled.

He drew back, standing at his full height and clenching his jaw. "So you can't be both?" he asked in a cool voice. "I don't get you sometimes, Eadlyn. One minute you're wonderful and I think that you can't be a much better person than you are but then other times…"

"What?"

He shook his head. "Other times I feel you're that girl that made boys cry on the first day of her Selection." If he didn't sound so exasperated, I would be offended. There was the smallest, most infinitesimal note of a smile in his voice though. "And why do you make it so damn difficult for me to be angry at you?" he asked, starting to smile.

I picked up a pillow and threw it across the bed at him. "Because I am just that enchanting."

"Don't push it," he warned, throwing the pillow back at me.

"Is that a threat? Are you threatening your queen?" I stepped up onto our bed, pillow clutched in my hands. "Because I will start a civil war with you."

He narrowed his eyes at me. "Well then we'll have to call you Helena, won't we? The woman who started wars simply for being beautiful." I bopped him on the head with the pillow. "Are we really doing this?" he asked, reaching for his own pillow.

"Hm," I hummed, pretending to be deciding. Then I sprang at him and pulled him down on his face by my feet. I lept off our bed before he could grab me but he quickly recovered and chased me to our balcony and back through the doors of his adjoining room, both of us yelling and getting hits in with our pillows where we could. I backed into our room, my arms up. "Okay, okay, white flag!"

"Give up so quickly?" he asked, laughing and slightly out of breath.

I nodded and shook my head simultaneously. "I'm just out of shape."

"You're pregnant, Eadlyn."

"Hey! Want to sleep out there on that balcony?"

"Only if you're there with me," he said in a low voice, coming toward me slowly with his arms outstretched. I met him halfway, embracing him tightly. We kissed and he slowly made his way over to our bed, dragging me with him.

I curled up in his arms, staring toward the door that linked his room to mine. "You don't use your bedroom," I said thoughtfully, stroking the arm he had wrapped around my waist.

"Why would I when you're sleeping in here?"

"I'd like to redo your room then," I told him. "I've been thinking about it and I want the nursery there. That way it's close by and we won't have to go running down the hall in the middle of the night whenever the baby cries."

"Okay."

"But for the first few months, I want the baby in here with us in a bassinet. I don't want to be too far."

"Okay."

"And I want Brice to be the godmother," I concluded.

He chuckled quietly. "You've really given this some thought, haven't you?"

I snuggled closer to him. "Tonight is the last night that this is our business. I'm just trying to flesh some things out before everyone starts asking questions. I'm trying to enjoy these last few hours of peace and quiet."

"You consider the biggest royal scandal on the century peace and quiet?"

"Maybe not," I giggled. I tilted my chin so that I could look up at him. "I'm really happy that I married you."

He smiled at me. "Yeah?"

"I wouldn't want anyone else by my side for all of this craziness."

"I wouldn't want to be by anyone else's side," he said as kissed my forehead tenderly. I slithered down further in bed but paid extra care to making sure that my hand was still linked to his as I drifted off.

In the morning, we ate breakfast privately in my room. Eloise dressed me in a flowy dress that helped to both hide my bump and give the illusion that I had a baby bump. Eikko and I didn't talk as we walked down to the television studio, our hands held tightly together. I started shaking as we walked in. I was mad at my parents, furious even. That didn't mean I wanted to see everything they had built in the last twenty years come crashing down. Especially because of Marid. Dad had suffered enough at the hands of the Illéas – he didn't need anymore.

If there was ever a time I really wanted to talk to my mom though, it was then. She had done this before. She and Dad and sat in the very same studio and announced to the world that they were expecting an heir. She had faced the fear of not being able to give her a children a normal childhood, of having to give something so sacred over to the people so that they could dissect every moment of her pregnancy.

"Remember that time you proposed to me in this studio?" Eikko asked, sensing my nerves.

"If I could go back to that moment right now, I would."

He shook his head. "I'm so thankful for Henri. Think of what would have happened if he hadn't been so perceptive and called us out."

"We should have him over for a day some time. And Ean and Hale. Even Fox. I miss all of them." It was weird, talking about inviting my ex-boyfriends to the palace with my husband but they were more than just my exes. They were my friends.

"You're trying to distract yourself."

"It's not working," I groaned. He started rubbing my back as Gavril approached us, looking dapper and wide-awake despite the early hour of the morning.

"Good morning, Your Majesties," he greeted. Standing right in front of us, I could see the dark circles beneath his eyes that makeup only just barely covered up. "You both look refreshed and ready to take on the day."

"We are," Eikko said. I think it was the first night in a long time that he had slept straight through the night.

Gavril nodded, jotting something down on a notepad. "We are going to open with you two. I'm just going to ask you some questions and you'll know when it's time to announce the news. After that, we'll invite your parents on stage and we'll have some wonderful reminiscing time from when they announced that they were pregnant with you and Ahren. I hope to have this interview cut and edited by afternoon so that it can air on primetime television."

"Sounds good, Gavril. Thank you so much."

He strode over to the seat he usually occupied when he was hosting Reports. Mom and Dad were getting the final touches of their makeup. There definitely seemed to be something between the two of them with the way that Dad kept brushing his free hands over Mom, almost obsessively. Mom would just shake her head and bump her elbow against him. They definitely had their own language. Sometimes it seemed like they lived in their own world entirely.

The cameramen counted down for Gavril and suddenly, he was doing the introduction and I felt like I couldn't breathe. I knew what angle to play, then. I knew why we could be announcing the pregnancy so soon.

"Ladies and gentlemen of Illéa, I am here for a very special interview with Queen Eadlyn and King Eikko. They called me from my vacation to have me do this interview, isn't that right?" he asked, pretending to be put out by our fake demands.

"We wouldn't want to share this interview with anyone else, Gavril," Eikko said. "You've been such an integral part of our lives together. We want you to stay here."

"Alas, Tuscany simply has better wine," Gavril said, sounding devastated.

Eikko laughed. "Maybe someday I could get to Tuscany so that I would know if you're telling the truth." The two really had a gift for playing off of each other.

"Now, Your Majesties, we really haven't heard much from either of you since your wedding. How is married life?" Gavril asked, leaning in dramatically.

I put my hand on Eikko's shoulder to stop him from answering. "I couldn't be happier with anyone else, Gavril. Aside from being a wonderful husband, seeing him thrive in his new role as king is satisfying and makes me more proud of him every day."

There was applause from the camera crew and Gavril waved to them to quiet down. "Okay, okay. High praises from your wife, King Eikko. Anything you would like to add?"

"Only that if the rest of my life is as blissful as these last few months have been, I will have very little to complain about. It truly is something special to find someone that you not only have a connection with as a spouse but who you can also work with everyday and not get tired of it," Eikko answered.

"I think it's safe to say that the honeymoon period is still going," Gavril joked, winking at the camera. "Anymore news for the country?"

This was it. My stomach clenched but I swallowed my nerves and leaned in closer to Eikko, scandalously close to him. "Actually, Gavril, we do have news." I looked at Eikko expectantly. We had planned this out in the morning as we got dressed. I just hoped that his nerves wouldn't get the better of him.

"Yes, we found out a couple months ago and it's early—"

"—but we really want to share it with everyone," I cut in, starting to improvise. "We are very please to announce that we are expecting a baby."

Gavril's eyes widened as if he had never heard of such a thing. "A baby? As in an heir?"

"Yes," Eikko confirmed.

"We're announcing it a tad earlier than usual because I have been having some difficulties with morning sickness. Any appearances or events that I've backed out of, I'm sorry, but I've spent the majority of the last four weeks feeling rather under the weather," I confessed dramatically. It was only partially true. At eleven weeks, my morning sickness was waning but around week eight I could barely make it out of bed without the room spinning.

Gavril sputtered, as if at a loss for words. "Well, how far along are you, Queen Eadlyn?"

"Nine weeks," Eikko answered, cutting me off. We shared a fond smile. "Sorry, I just can't curb my excitement. I adore children and this is a little earlier than I think either of us planned on starting a family but we couldn't be more overjoyed with the thought of having a baby for the summer."

Gavril nodded. "Of course! It's only natural for you to want to share it with everyone. Thank you so much for the news, Your Majesties, we can't wait to share more of this journey with you both." The lights dimmed on the sofa as Gavril went into introducing my parents.

I walked with him to the side of the stage and stopped behind the line of cameras. "Do you think it'll work?" I asked Georgean and Brice.

Brice's face was grim but her eyes had that glint that Dad's would get when he was facing a dangerous challenge. "I don't know but it's all we have."


	20. Chapter 20

An heir wasn't enough.

"It was a stroke of genius, Your Majesty," Gavril said as we debriefed the day after our announcement. "Unfortunately, as ridiculous as it sounds, people are questioning your legitimacy and a scandal like that cannot be outweighed by you having an heir."

"This is ridiculous!" Mom exclaimed, looking like she was trying very hard not to throw her tea cup across the room. "Eadlyn is a _twin_ , for God's sake. Ahren is the spitting image of Maxon. Who could possibly believe that Eadlyn isn't his daughter? That doesn't even work biologically."

"Actually, there's a precedent for it. It's rare but some women have given birth to twins who had two different fathers. It happens if the mother has intercourse with two different men within a couple hours, allowing the eggs to be fertilized within hours of each other—"

Brice held up her hand to silence Georgean. "Georgean, please. We don't need this."

She faced Mom and Dad. "We will keep working to tone this press down. In a week, they'll stop talking about it and move on to something else. For now, we need to focus on the constitution and the new policies for your constitutional monarchy."

"We are going to need to host another summit," I said. "Or a conference or a tea party or something. Half of our allies are at war with each other. I can't have that kind of controversy surrounding these reforms."

Gavril nodded. "Absolutely right, Your Majesty. Leave the scandal to me, it will all get cleared up. Ms. Future-Prime-Minister, work with Eadlyn on the Report for this week. You'll be announcing Lady Brice as your Prime Minister, correct?"

"Yes," I confirmed. "And we'll brief the people on how the power is split."

"Which we should probably really discuss and nail down before Friday," Brice said, jumping in. There was a small, triumphant smile on her face as we discussed the fact that she would soon be Prime Minister, a position she probably would have never dreamt of a few years ago.

I go to my office and get started on the pile of bills I needed to read, just wanting to get through it so that I could go back to bed. I wasn't feeling too sick anymore since I wasn't in my first trimester anymore. Mom told me I didn't even have that severe of morning sickness, much to her annoyance. She said that she could barely make it out of bed when she was pregnant with Ahren and I. Even with not being sick though, I was exhausted. Mom and Miss Marlee urged me to take it easy and lighten my load but I couldn't. Not when World War Five was any second from starting and when I was trying to reform the government.

"Today, we really need to focus on who is going to be in the Prime Council," Brice said, sitting in her usual seat across from me. "These people are going to be our inner circle. Just like your advisers, but smaller. It's a similar concept to the President's cabinet in the United States. Each adviser has their own area of policy that they oversee and we oversee all of them together. They answer to one of us, depending on what area their policies are focused on."

"Right. And you're still handling domestic policy while I am in charge of foreign policy?"

She nodded. "That would be best. You have much better connections to our allies abroad and it will always be that way with your family since you are related in some way to half our allies. Here is a list of candidates that your father and I put together, considering who would be most advantageous or knowledgeable in certain areas of policy."

"He didn't put himself in that list, right?" I asked.

She smiled and shook her head. "No. I think he really wanted to but he knows that he is supposed to be retired right now. No, these are all advisors or even popular mayors."

I scanned the list, thankfully recognizing everyone on the list. A few names did jump out at me, like Mayor Hutchinson and Mayor Dean. "I'll mark the people that I approve. You should pick the advisors that know the most about domestic policy; you'll be working with them the most."

"Yes, Your Majesty." Her eyes widened as she gazed out of the window behind me. "Are you expecting guests?"

I turned in my seat and saw the gate of the wall sitting open in the distance. A convoy of black palace-issued cars rolled down the drive, pulling to a neat stop at the front of the palace. "Not that I know of," I answered, rising slowly to get a better look. It technically wasn't my responsibility to know about all of our guests – that fell under Eikko's job. He knew about every single guest to pass through our doors and would tell me only about the ones that we were involved with.

"Where are you going?" Brice asked as I walked out of my office.

"To see who it is."

"Eadlyn, you don't know that those people aren't rebels or people here to kill you. I really must recommend that you stay up here within the safety of the third floor," Brice said urgently, struggling to keep up with me on her shorter legs.

"If anyone tries to shoot me, the dozens of guards watching us right now will surely stop it," I said, not really taking her warnings seriously. When we reached the landing to the steps in the main entrance of the palace, Dad was standing at the top, his lips together in a weird smile as he looked down toward the front doors. "Dad, what's going on?" I asked, starting to get concerned.

He met my eyes, looking slightly overwhelmed. "It was your mother's idea," he said. "She decided to call in…reinforcements."

"Reinforcements? What does that man?" I followed his gaze and saw Mom wrapped up in a group hug with three other women. It was only when they separated and I got a good look at them that I recognized them. I had only seen them in stray photographs commemorating the Selection, normally published around Mom and Dad's wedding anniversary. "Dad, those are…"

"Three of my ex-girlfriends with my wife," he finished for me. He smiled ironically. "She's kept in touch with most of them but obviously, not all of them were happy to be friends with the woman who won over the prince." Giggles echoed through the whole foyer, making me wrinkle my nose.

I shook my head. "This isn't a good idea." There was a loud squeal and I saw Lady Marlee dash into the arms of one of the women.

"We don't have many ideas left Eadlyn," he said sadly.

"I'm not on board with this."

He ran a hand through his hair, bowing his head slightly. "We're just trying to make your reign easier. We're trying to fix things."

"Why does it feel like whenever you try to fix things or make my reign easier, you make it worse? Need I remind you of the nightmare that was my Selection?" I snapped.

"I'm not arguing with you, Eadlyn." His tone was final. For a second, I put myself in his shoes. An affair my mom had with another man is broadcasted, the world questions the legitimacy of his marriage and children, and his wife calls in some of his ex-girlfriends to help fix everything. None of this could have been very easy on him. He could have avoided it though if he had just told us about it and we knew.

Mom happened to glance up and notice us then, gathered at the top of the steps. "Eadlyn!" she called. She said something to the women around her and they started approaching us. As if Dad having to see all of his ex-girlfriends again wasn't enough, now I had to personally meet all of them. Dad clasped his hands behind his back and left, choosing to avoid the scene altogether. If he hadn't done so, I would have.

"Eadlyn, this is Elise, Natalie, and Kriss," Mom said, gesturing to each woman. I tried to fix the name to the face but my head swam as I thought about all the much more important things I could be doing.

"Ah!" Natalie squealed, coming toward me with wide-open arms. I stiffened, not expecting her to be so enthusiastic. When she pulled away, she was giggling nonstop. "I'm sorry, I've just wanted to meet you for so long. Your mom has told me all about you."

"She has?" I asked. Brice coughed out a laugh behind me.

Another woman stepped forward then, I'm pretty sure it was Kriss. Her hug was kind of awkward and I could tell that she and Mom had some tension between them. Nothing that would make me nervous or think that there was some animosity but neither of them seemed to be very comfortable at all.

The third one stepped forward and gave me a firm handshake. "Elise, Your Majesty. It is a pleasure to finally meet you," she said kindly. Unlike Natalie and Kriss who were both in sundresses, she was wearing a skirt and a fancy blazer. Everything about her screamed poise and professionalism.

It was then that I realized why she looked so familiar. "You were an ambassador for Illéa," I said aloud, putting the pieces together in my mind. Of course I had seen her in some pictures from the Selection but I had also seen her on video conferences with my father and his advisors.

"Not since you were eight years old," she said. "You have a sharp mind to remember that. You must get that from your mother."

Mom rolled her eyes. "Sharp mind, maybe. Sharp tongue, definitely."

Elise laughed at Mom. All of these women seemed to be communicating on the same wavelength with their secret glances and quiet giggles at jokes that weren't voiced. "My eldest is currently in school studying foreign policy, hoping to take my position as ambassador some day," Elise informed me.

"Why did you stop?" I asked.

"I wanted to focus on raising my sons. They give me more happiness than any job could."

Marlee threw an arm over Elise's shoulder. "Well we appreciate that you at least had kids." She gave a pointed look to Kriss and Natalie.

"Are you kidding? I could never," Natalie said, slightly horrified. "Besides, I think American and Maxon had enough kids to cover all of us."

"I am perfectly happy with my life as it is," Kriss said decisively, folding her arms.

"Yeah, didn't you hear? She's raising pythons now. Don't you have her on some sort of rebel watch list, Mer?" Natalie teased.

Mom's eyes twinkled mischievously. "Maybe." She and Kriss shared a secret smile.

"Speaking of children, congratulations Eadlyn!" Elise said enthusiastically, reaching for my hand. "I was so happy to hear your news on the Report this past week. Believe me, being a mother is the most incredible thing you'll ever do."

"Plus, we can make fun of America for being a grandmother," Natalie added.

"You haven't been here for ten minutes and you're already laughing at me," Mom grumbled but she didn't look too unhappy about being a grandmother. I knew that she was possibly one of the most excited people for my baby.

Brice tapped me on the shoulder and then pointed to her watch, indicating that we had to get moving with the rest of our day. "Right, well we must be going. Someone's got to run the country," I told them. "It was a pleasure meeting all of you."

"They're quite the group," Brice said as we walked back up to my office, checking that we were out of earshot. Not that it would have mattered. The guards on the fourth floor could probably hear the giggles coming from all of them.

"Right, well, where are we off to?"

Brice frowned, looking slightly ashamed. "You don't have any meetings until four o'clock today, ma'am. I was simply rescuing you."

"Brice," I said, wrapping her in a side-hug, "you are the _best_ aunt ever."

"We best not repeat that in front of Miss May."

My meeting was exactly what I needed in that for once, it was a budget meeting where we didn't have to fight over anything. No huge initiatives were underway, no provinces were in dire need of assistance, and Kile was still coming in under budget with his work in Panama. We were in and out within forty-five minutes but my head was still swimming. Mom told me that I would start feeling better once I got into my second trimester and the more miserable side effects were going away but I still had headaches and dizzy spells. And fatigue. Lots of fatigue.

I lifted my phone and dialed the number for Eikko's office. "Yes, Your Majesty?" Raelynn answered for him.

I sat up straighter, not expecting her to answer. "Raelynn, where's Eikko?"

"In a meeting with Georgean, discussing the calendar for next year. Can I help you with anything?"

"No," I said, trying not to sound too disappointed. "Just calling to check in. Thanks Raelynn." I hung up my phone and dropped my head into my arms. "Neena?" I called.

Neena poked her head inside my office from her position outside. "Yes, ma'am?"

"Tell Lady Brice that I'm calling it a day."

"Yes, ma'am."

With the holidays coming up, we had a small reprieve from our workloads. Eikko was busy with party planning and setting the menus for dinners we would be hosting for dignitaries but with most advisors already on vacation, I had a break. The day after Christmas everything would go into overdrive to complete things for the New Year but for now, I actually had some free time to relax.

My phone ringing made me jump out of my seat. I reached for it, thinking it was maybe Eikko returning my call, but stopped when the Caller ID read _France, A. Schreave_. This was his ninth call in the last four days. I could do it. I could pick up my phone and cry and apologize and send him ten thousand troops and a small country's worth of firepower to aid France in the war. But I couldn't. I would be sending ten thousand men to their deaths and imagining them dying on foreign soil made my stomach knot.

Instead of listening to the phone ring, I moved myself down the hall to the library, figuring that maybe I could use my time wisely and actually educate myself. The library wasn't empty though.

"Lady Elise," I greeted, finding her with a few books in her arms.

"Queen Eadlyn," she answered, curtsying. She smiled guiltily at her load. "Your mother said I could borrow some but I have no idea which ones to choose. I would take the whole room if I could."

I offered her a friendly smile. "I can come back later—"

"No, no, it's fine. This is your home. I'm just a guest."

"A guest for the queen."

She waved her hand like it was nothing. "She's not the queen to me. She's one of my oldest friends." She smiled to herself, getting lost in some memory. "My sons were five and seven when they both got the stomach bug. Of course they passed it on to me but then I still had to take care of them because my husband was away on a trip. She was the first one I called just to cry and beg for some advice. Obviously she couldn't really help me because you can't cure a stomach bug but she had at least been there. She had just had Kaden at the time so she understood what it was like to be an overwhelmed mother and she knew what I needed to hear. She'll be of such good use to you in the coming years."

I nodded, not knowing how to respond. I wondered if Mom had mentioned that we were currently at odds. "So you left your job as ambassador to be a mother?"

She shrugged. "It wasn't my original intention. I had actually planned to stick it out for as long as possible but I eventually grew to hate leaving them with a nanny. I don't regret it at all. Of course now, they're both at school and I'm suddenly all by myself and more bored than ever."

"That makes sense."

"I've thought about it a bit, getting back to work. I just don't know what I would do. Your treaty with New Asia is still holding strong, right?" I nodded. "Then what do you need me for? Translating?" She shook her head. "I'm afraid that I am now obsolete in the world of diplomacy."

"I don't think so."

"Please, Queen Eadlyn, you don't need to flatter me. I know my place in the world and it's by my husband's side, supporting our sons. That's my duty now."

I stepped forward and inspected the stack of books she had. "If you're looking for excitement, I recommend Radcliffe. Her books are on that corner shelf, there. Mom and Dad read them together a couple years ago. Dad ended up staying all night reading it and he fell asleep during a budget meeting that day. Mom teased him about it for months."

"She would," Elise said softly. "I'll take a look."

I stepped out in the hallway, intent on going back to my office when one of General Leger's deputies stopped me. "Queen Eadlyn, I was just on my way to find you," he said, a paper clutched in his hand.

"What is it, Officer Welles?" I asked, walking by his side.

He passed me the memo and gave me the cliff notes version as I read. "New Asia is supporting North Africa in the war."

"And?"

"And what?" he asked, stopping.

"And what does this mean?" He stared at me, blinking, floundering to remember if he had any other information to share. "How are they supporting them? Are they sending them troops? Are they sending supplies? Are they sending them nuclear weapons? These are the things I need to know." I stopped when I realized that I didn't know where we were walking. "At least tell me you know where your men are meeting."

He pointed down to the next door down the hall on the right, the usual conference room we used for military briefings. I walked in and found several advisors and generals gathered, as well as Brice. "So much for calling it a day," she said to me, giving me a pitiful look.

"What do we know?" I asked the room, desperately needing to be briefed. I was only met with silence though. "Where did this report come from?"

"Our Italian ambassador," Sir Andrews answered.

"And did he have anything else for us? Any more intel?" Sir Andrews frowned. I sighed, fighting the urge to scream in frustration. "Where is General Leger?" I asked, realizing that he wasn't there. If he were there, he would have all that I needed to know. He wouldn't have just given me this report with nothing else.

"Gavril had him leave," Brice told me.

"He _what_?" I asked, my voice starting to rise.

Brice cringed at my hostility but went on. "He doesn't think it's wise to have him here with all of the bad press circulating—"

"I don't think it's wise to not have our head of defense and security gone when there's a war going on!" I exclaimed. "Someone call the Legers and get him here now. And make sure his wife comes. I don't care what Gavril has to say about it, they should be here where they'll be safe."

I shrugged out of my blazer and rolled up the long sleeves of my dress, folding my arms. "General Lenze, is our ambassador still awake?" I asked, knowing that it was close to bed time in Italy.

"Yes. Italy is currently on high alert. New Asians own ports in the Mediterranean on islands surrounding Italy," he reported. "The ambassador said that the queen and her advisors are in a security meeting."

"Then get the Italian queen on the phone. Maybe she can enlighten us."

Mr. Rasmus dialed the number for Queen Nicoletta on the conference phone. Eikko entered, eyes instantly finding me in the room and lighting up. He joined me right away, rubbing my back gently. "Should I get someone to bring food and coffee?" he asked, which translated to _Are we going to be here all night?_

"No. There's nothing truly urgent here. Don't worry, I'll get to bed on time tonight," I said, touching my forehead to his shoulder and placing a kiss there. He squeezed me just as Nicoletta answered.

"I don't take calls often during security meetings but for the queen of Illéa, I must," she said by way of greeting. Her voice lacked its usual humorous lilt. She was worried, very worried.

"Queen Nicoletta, I wish I was calling under different circumstances," I said. I moved closer to the phone and leaned against the long mahogany table. "We got a rather vague call memo from our ambassador. Perhaps you can inform us the status of New Asia's involvement in North Africa."

"Absolutely," she said. "Right now, they have naval vessels positioned in the Mediterranean, flying both the New Asian flag and North African flag, giving no doubt as to who they're supporting in this. They just appeared this afternoon. Our naval base in Carthage telegraphed us to warn that a New Asian assault may be eminent."

I snapped my fingers at some of the officers in the room to start writing stuff down. "Do you have the coordinates for those vessels?"

"Yes, my general can fax them to you," she said.

"And the status of the New Asian ports near you?"

"All is quiet so far. We've been in touch with France and England so most of Europe is under high alert and they have troops moving toward their coasts."

I nodded in approval. "Good."

"Eadlyn, we can't afford to fight both North Africa and New Asia simultaneously. They have us surrounded on all sides if that's the case and both countries are super empires. They have so much more money and more people to use as troops—"

"We'll do what we can to help you, Nicoletta. Just remember that though we're not allies, Illéa can't get in a tussle with New Asia. Our treaty is holding steady so far and we can't get involved with them so soon after our war ended."

"I understand, Your Majesty." There was shuffling in the background and a male voice announced something that came out muffled on our end. "Oh no."

"Nicoletta? What's happening?"

There was a long silence as Nicoletta spoke rapidly in Italian, too quickly for me to understand with my semi-okay knowledge in Italian. "The New Asians have tanks on the ground in Swendway. Eadlyn, I really must go. I'll bring your ambassador in here so that he can give you a full report."

"Thank you so much, Nicoletta. Best of luck." The line went dead before I even got it all out. Without Nicoletta's loud Italian voice and the chaos in the background of her call, the room felt silent and tiny.

Brice let out a long breath. "We can't fight New Asia," she said quietly. Her eyes were wide and for once I detected a little bit of fear.

"We barely have the money to fight anyone," Sir Andrews added.

"My family," Eikko whispered behind me, his thoughts somewhere else entirely. On the other side of the world, actually.

"France is in danger," Brice said, her voice heavy with misery. "Ahren…he's in danger."

Officer Welles was the only one whose eyes met mine in a room where the tension and desperation threatened to suffocate all of us. He had only been on the guard for a year. General Leger saw promise in him and promoted him to my family's detail right after training and field-testing. He hadn't been exposed to war, he hadn't experienced an attack more extreme than Marid since coming to the palace. Now that I thought about it, I hadn't either.

He asked me, "What do we do?"

Dad had always told me to not look weak in front of advisors. He told me that even when times got tough and it looked like there was no way out, keep my head high and dig my heels in because I was the leader and if I was scared, everyone else would be scared. I wasn't scared though. I was torn in a million different directions. I worried as a twin for my brother in France and his kingdom. I was worried as a wife for Eikko's family in Swendway. I was a worried queen, looking down the barrels of several guns that seemed to be pointing at my country from various enemies. Most of all, I was a worried mother. Because I couldn't keep this little life inside of me forever. Eventually my baby would be born and eventually they would inherit my crown, no matter what state the country is in.

So I pushed aside what my father had taught me and told the truth to some of my most loyal advisors and soldiers. "I don't know."


	21. Chapter 21

The thing about war is that it doesn't take a break. Wars are constantly being fought. Soldiers don't see that its time for bed and shake hands and hunker down for the night, waking up at eight o'clock the next morning and eating a full breakfast before going back to fighting. And for those kings and queens responsible for their soldiers lives? They can't just stop sleeping. They need their rest so that they can make smart, well thought-out decisions. People die overnight, it happens. It simply is a matter of waking up and getting briefed.

Dad never really went into how to be a leader during a time of war with me. Maybe he didn't think that I would need to know or he hoped that I wouldn't but he only gave me one piece of advice: don't let the war rule your life. He told me that even as a queen, I would need to take at least a half hour to myself in the morning where I didn't look at the paper or news and just focus my thoughts on me for a little bit. Otherwise I would run myself into the ground with constant worry.

I took that required time and cleared my thoughts while Eloise did my makeup and dressed me for the day. When the butler placed the morning paper down in front of me, I realized that no peaceful morning with only the sounds of Eloise's soft humming as she waltzed around me could prepare me for this. _New Asian Soldiers Capture French Coastal Town_.

The New Asians were officially in France.

I dropped the paper and met Eikko's concerned gaze. I simply passed the paper to him, waiting for his reaction to the news. "Eadlyn, you need to call your brother," he said quietly.

"I can't."

"Eadlyn."

"I can't," I repeated firmly. "What am I going to say? 'Hey, sorry about New Asia, but we can't help you fight them and risk upsetting the treaty'?"

"Surely we can find a way to help them," Eikko argued. "It seems wrong that we're here letting your brother's kingdom get attacked and not offering any sort of aid."

I held up a hand to stop him. "Eikko, I'd really like to not have to talk about foreign policy while eating my oatmeal, okay?"

"Then what do you want to talk about?" he asked, his voice biting into me.

"I don't…" I stammered.

He put down his knife and fork and shook his head. "Why don't we talk about the last time we had a date? Do you know when that was? Two weeks ago, Eadlyn. The only time I really get to see you is at night or in the morning but even then, you're rushing off with Eloise at first light to get dressed. Let's talk about my family, who is currently in a country that the New Asians are occupying."

"We've only known that for twelve hours, we'll discuss it today at my meeting—"

" _Our_ meeting. And it's my family. We should have discussed that last night, as soon as we knew. But I guess since it's just me, your prince consort, it doesn't matter."

I rolled my eyes. "It's not like that, Eikko. You're my husband."

"Am I?" he asked quickly. The room suddenly felt much larger as his words hung in the air between us. "Lately, it's felt a lot like I'm only good for publicity or helping to plan your tea parties." He stood and took his plate in his hand. "I think I'll finish my breakfast in my office."

The Great Room seemed ever larger than a few seconds before with just me sitting at the grand table by myself, staring at the empty room in front of me. A door clicked open and in stepped my parents. Dad must have just told one of his usually insufferable jokes because Mom was giggling with a hand pressed to her mouth, her free arm linked with Dad's. She grew quiet as they got closer to the table and realized that I was alone.

"Eads, honey, what's wrong?" she asked, taking Dad's hand and stepping closer to us.

"Nothing," I said. I rose from the table and left my napkin by my place. "I have work to do. Enjoy breakfast."

There was someone waiting for me in my office when I arrived. My hand slid down the door as I shut it, chewing on my lip and trying to come up with a way to start this conversation. "General Leger."

He turned from where he was standing at the window, looking out over the front driveway for the palace, and his eyes swept over me. "Your Majesty."

I hadn't been alone with him since the news of my mother's scandal with him had broken just a couple weeks prior. He had been keeping his head low and then Gavril made the idiotic decision that wasn't even his decision to make in the first place that General Leger should leave his post at the palace. "Haven't seen you in a bit," I said hesitantly, getting off to a less-than-graceful start.

"I've been hiding, ma'am," he admitted.

I frowned. General Leger was a lot of things. He was a soldier, a husband, a friend, a confidante, a trusted advisor, an uncle…but definitely not a coward. "Why? You've never hid from anything."

He fidgeted with his hat in his hands. "Well, I'm sure you've seen the papers."

Oh. That was true. Whatever the people had to say about Mom for the scandal was bad but it was even worse for him. They accused him of being all sorts of things. They accused him of trying to break up my parents, of seducing my mom into falling in love with him, of raping my mother to force her to not consider the prince. That wasn't even the worst rumor. The worst rumor was that he raped her and it didn't work so he planned the rebel attack to then get the rebels to kill my dad. It all was atrocious and I understood why, if I were him, it would be best to hide from it all.

"Then it's a good thing that we have much bigger fish to fry here," I said, walking over to my desk and thumbing through the folders left for me for the day. "I pray that one of those less-than-competent officers briefed you on the issue of New Asia's involvement with the war in Europe. I need to know the extent of the damage in France, right now." He was quiet, just staring at me. "Is there a problem, General Leger?"

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty, but I haven't been here in days. With the press that's circulating, I don't think it'd be wise—"

"General Leger," I said in my sharpest Queen voice. "Listen to me very closely. You dated my mother. You dated my mother when she was dating the most favorite king of this nation. The press is talking about you and my mother and we all are screwed because of something that you two did as teenagers. That happens sometimes, I guess. Right now, we have a nation with an exceptionally powerful military with whom we have an exceptionally unstable treaty invading my brother's shores and I need my commanding general at my side to help me sort through this mess."

"I didn't want to hurt your family, you know."

I nodded. "I know."

"No, Eadlyn, you don't. For the last twenty years, I've sacrificed myself every day for the sake of your family's protection. I always told myself that the day I failed to do that would be the day I died in the line of duty." My eyes widened slightly. "I know it's extreme but for me, that is what I've given my life for and I wasn't going to let myself retire just to watch any of you get hurt when I should have still been here."

"So you're just going to work here until you're ninety years old?"

"Or until I need to take a bullet for any of you."

"What about Miss Lucy? She'd be devastated to lose you."

He smiled sadly. "She understands me though. She knows that I have a hero complex." He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed it lightly. "Thank you for bringing me back."

"Of course. That's what I do," I reminded him. "Can we save my brother now?"

"Yes, we can."

Having General Leger back in command made going to my security meeting for the day feel like going home after an arduous business trip. In the meeting, we got fresh information on the status of New Asia in France and how much of a threat they were. We were able to formulate a game plan moving forward. As good as it felt though, I couldn't shake an uneasiness I had with what he had said earlier. My dad loved being a king and I think he could have been king happily for another couple years but he couldn't wait for retirement to spend every day with unlimited free time with Mom. Why wasn't that enough for General Leger? He absolutely loved Miss Lucy as much as my parents loved each other. Why wasn't he in any hurry to retire for her?

It was when I was walking back to my office that I knew the answer. Passing a large, open window, I heard the sound of laughter coming from the lawn down below. I stopped and watched, smiling slightly. Mom and Dad were with Kaden and Osten. From the looks of it, they were painting a huge white canvas together. I had no idea what they were supposed to be painting or if they even knew but seeing Dad with his sons, sitting next to Mom and bopping her on the nose with the end of his brush, I could see why he was so anxious to leave this life of being trapped behind a desk. He had so much to look forward to after being king whereas General Leger had no children. He had no children and Kile was in Panama, Ahren was in France, Kaden was starting to date Josie and was becoming more of a man with each passing day. Even the kids he helped to raise and was an uncle to were starting to grow up. When he retired, he would be retiring to a life spent with his wife. Happily but there would always be something missing. That didn't mean he had to do his job until he died.

I really needed a break from everything. Just a breath of air to give me some clarity. My brother was stuck in a war that his wife started by accident and now one of our biggest enemies was breathing down his neck. Eikko was feeling unworthy and I had no idea how to balance his insecurities with my work life and we were about to have a baby together. I really just needed to talk to someone who understood all of these pressures of family and personal life and scandal but managed to be a good queen.

When I got to the fourth floor, I took my usual seat across from my grandmother's portrait and chewed on my lip for a while. "I really don't want this to become a habit but for some reason, I find clarity here. So here we go again," I said.

"Mom and Dad have always spoken so highly of you. Dad said that you were the mom he needed to balance out his dad. Your husband was too busy being the king so you were the mom your family needed, even when it was hard. It's just not fair that you died so young. You deserved to see your son grow up. It's not fair that you didn't get to meet us." I sighed and touched my belly, the bump that was growing just a little bit every day. "I guess if you were here, you would tell me to call my brother, wouldn't you?" Her pleasant smile was the only response I got. "Cool. Got it. You win."

I withdrew my secure cell phone. It was technically only supposed to be used for emergency calls but I figured General Leger would forgive me for this one phone call. Ahren answered on the first ring.

"Eadlyn?"

"Hey," I answered softly. I wasn't expecting to feel nervous but I did.

"Oh, Eadlyn, I am so sorry. I was a fool, I should have never said any of those things to you. Of course I can't expect you to help me with every little thing. You have your own economy and everything to worry about for yourself and I can't always be your needy little brother." His syllables were all running together with the rate at which he spoke and it made me smile. "And I understand with the baby and all. Oh my gosh, I haven't even said congrats yet. I mean, congratulations! You're going to be a mother Eads and I know you're scared but you'll be fine—"

"How do you know I'm scared?" I asked suddenly.

It made him stop and I slapped myself internally. This was not the way I'd imagined starting the conversation. "Well, I…I don't know. I can just tell that you're scared."

"You know me."

"Yeah, I do. You're my other half, of course I know you. You've been my best friend for my entire life. Literally, you've always been by my side."

I blinked to stop myself from crying but dammit the tears were coming. "It's really good to hear your voice again. I don't even remember what happened but it sucks to fight with you."

"Let's not do it again, okay?"

"Yeah, okay."

His own voice sounded a little watery. It was eerie really, how similar to Dad he sounded on the phone. "Eadlyn, why are you calling me on your private line?"

"Officially? To tell you that I'm sending you food and medical supplies for your civilians so that they're not suffering too much. Unofficially? Because I couldn't stand not talking to you anymore."

"I know what you mean. I think Camille was about to go crazy from how agitated I've been without you."

I huffed in agreement. "Yeah, there aren't enough of us Schreaves to be fighting."

"Definitely not. How's Eikko?"

"Good," I said haltingly. "We're actually fighting."

"Eadlyn. Why?"

"I'm a terrible person and haven't been a good wife lately. He feels like I've been ignoring his needs, which is true. I just can't find a balance to everything. And it's only going to get worse come June fourteenth."

He gasped. "Is that the due date?"

"Yeah."

"Hm. So there's a time limit on this little fight, huh? Well, if you can't find a balance on your own, delegate. You have a palace full of people at your disposal Eads. They are meant to serve you. Put them to work."

"I can't delegate my marriage."

He laughed. "You can but you probably shouldn't. Listen, you need to make it clear to those working for you that you're in charge. Who does your schedule, Eadlyn?" I was quiet as I responded rhetorically that a room full of secretaries set my schedule for me. Ahren knew how it worked though. "Tell your secretaries that you aren't available at specific hours. You're the queen, they have to honor you."

"Do I really have time to give up though? There's so much happening now."

"Do you really have to be at every public image strategizing meeting? Let Gavril's new minions plan things for you and they'll tell you where to be and what to wear. And those meetings for agricultural planning? You really need to be that in touch with the nation's farmers? Send Eikko or Brice if you have to. After all, isn't the point of your constitutional monarchy to ensure that kings and queens are no longer working themselves to death by doing everything?"

I drew circles on the velvet seat of the bench beneath me. "I guess it's just hard to give up the reins."

"Obviously," he said like I was being dumb but not so much so that I felt like an idiot.

"How did I survive without talking to you for so long?" I asked him, mostly rhetorically. It seemed ridiculous that we hadn't talked for weeks and now we were back to our usual banter.

He chose not to answer and was quiet for several moments before saying, "You know I won't be back for Christmas, right?"

"I figured."

"We just can't get away right now."

"Ahren, it's okay. And Mom and Dad will understand. They've been in your shoes before – I'm sure they understand why you won't be able to make it home." There were some voices in the background of his line and I knew that he was just seconds from saying goodbye.

"I need to go Eads but hey, it was really good hearing from you. Don't be a stranger, okay?"

"That's fine. I have plenty to do to keep myself busy. I love you Ahren."

"Love you too, Eadlyn."

I knew Eikko normally went to bed early so that he could relax a bit before going to sleep. It helped him sleep better if he could read or watch television, anything to keep his mind off of his normally anxious thoughts. I decided to take my brother's advice and delegate the reading of my bill to one of Brice's assistants. He didn't look up at me when I entered our bedroom. I quickly went through my nightly routine, washing my face and finding a nightgown that wasn't too small with my belly, which was getting more and more difficult since most of my nightgowns were made of unforgiving silk.

When I emerged in a cotton gown stretched tight around my hips, he couldn't help but glance up at me from his book. It was some sort of sci-fi book about physics and time travel and it made my head spin just thinking about it. Not Eikko's though. He was constantly finding new things to be interested in and physics was his latest obsession. I didn't know what he was planning on using with all of his new physics knowledge but it seemed to be entertaining him thoroughly and keeping him from being anxious about the baby and his family.

"I called my brother," I said casually as I rubbed my nighttime lotion into my forearms. He didn't respond. "We made up."

"That's good," he said in an even voice.

"And we'll be sending aid to the civilians in France. It's not really helping either side but it's at least helping the people who are caught in the crossfire."

Eikko nodded and turned a page, still not looking at me. "Good."

I lifted my phone into my hand and climbed into bed beside him. "I called my brother and made nice. Now it's time for you to do the same. Call your parents."

"No." Still didn't look up. He just kept turning pages.

"Do you want to protect your family?" He stopped reading and his eyes flicked up over his book, not looking up at me but focusing on something far away from us. "Call your parents. I'm not bringing your family here if you aren't getting along. You need to be the one to invite them."

Finally, _finally_ , his eyes met mine and there were a million fears and questions dancing in them. "How am I supposed to do that, Eadlyn? They hate your family and our positions in the world. How will I convince them to come here?"

"I think you'll find it rather easy to invite your parents and sister to come here when you bribe them with quality time with you and a baby, come June," I told him, gently pulling the book out of his hands and setting it behind me. "And they hate us because they don't understand our lifestyle. Having them here will help them see what we're doing on a daily basis and understand how busy we are."

He frowned, his hand placed over mine that was outstretched with the phone sitting in my palm. "I hate it when you're right."

"The safest place for them is here in the palace. If you're going to take them out of Swendway for their safety, don't do it halfway. We'll bring them here or find them a house nearby like my grandmother and the Legers. Either way, they should be here because that's what family does for family."

"Yeah?" he asked, not sounding so sure about that.

I put my phone down and took his hand in mine, placing it on my belly. "Family stays together, no matter what. And they're a team. I promise to spend more time with you and to put you first from now on because you are the last person that should come in last. You're the last person to deserve to come in last. You're as good as they come and I question every day how I ended up with someone as good as you."

He smirked and put his other free arm around my shoulders. "I don't deserve you. It's probably why I accept it when you don't pay attention to me but that's not the kind of marriage I want our baby to be born into."

"You're right."

"My parents were good friends but they were never soul mates or anything. You and me, we have something truly special and our children deserve to see that. I don't want it to die before they even get the chance," he admitted.

I rested my head on his shoulder, throwing one of my legs over his. "I agree. So what do we do to fix it?"

"Dates every Tuesday night. No matter what is happening, even if it's simply the two of us eating dessert in here. But for that hour of time, there will be no distractions."

"Okay."

"Now give me the phone," he grumbled. He took the phone and dialed a number without hesitation, putting it to his ear closest to me. I leaned in obnoxiously, making him roll his eyes but he was smiling at me anyway. Then it vanished. "Mom?"


	22. Chapter 22

It was quiet in what was called the war room. The hour was well past midnight but General Leger and his assistants sat around the table with me at the head, our eyes fixed on the screens in front of us. Eikko paced behind me, chewing on his thumbnail. We had only slept for a couple hours before moving in to the private conference room used only for viewing top-secret missions carried out by our espionage teams and Special Forces. This was General Leger's domain – we were merely guests.

"We're in position, Sir," a soldier radioed in. I found it baffling that they could communicate with us over a small radio all the way in Swendway but it did pay off in moments such as these. "My men are extracting the royal family now."

Eikko made a small sound in the back of his throat as the soldier called his family royal. With their estrangement, it was so easy to forget that they were technically royalty thanks to Eikko's marriage to me. From cameras set up by spies, we watched Illéa's best guards lead his sister and her family from their home in the capital city of Swendway in the hazy morning light.

The cameras changed to a viewing lens in the front of one of the security cars that would follow the car his sister was in. We watched them the entire way to the airport, Eikko never once slowing his pace.

"The airport is all clear, Sir. Permission to prepare for take off?" the lead guard asked General Leger.

"At your ready," General Leger confirmed. "Keep me informed of your precise arrival time." The cameras cut out and the guards in the room nodded in satisfaction. They trickled out, bowing to us but Eikko was still lost to the world.

General Leger put a hand on my shoulder. "Swendway is a small country. They will be out of Swendish air space soon enough and then you can breathe. They're all but perfectly safe right now."

"I think you should tell that to my husband," I said quietly. General Leger offered me a wink and approached Eikko, starting a whispered conversation that I couldn't hear. I was tired enough that I could put my head on the table and fall asleep right there but my mind was restless.

I dozed in and out of reality until I heard Eikko say, "I'd like to stay in here until they land."

"It will be several hours," General Leger warned.

"It's my family," Eikko insisted. That seemed to be all of the explanation General Leger needed because he nodded, bowed, and bid us both a good night before going outside to stand guard himself at the door.

I stood and put my hands on Eikko's shoulders. "She'll be fine."

"I'll breathe easily once she's here in the palace. Until then…" His voice trailed away and I didn't need him to elaborate to know that this was just an anxiety thing.

"Do you want me to send you some of your work to do in here for the time being?" I offered.

"That would be great. Thank you."

I exited the conference room and bobbed my head to General Leger as I proceeded down the hall, heading toward the southeastern wing where my family's bedrooms were located. It would be interesting to have Eikko's family in the palace but it could be good for us. Perhaps it would help mend things between us and his parents, for them to see us at work in our daily lives. Of course, they were coming at the time of year where we had the least amount of work and would be lounging around for large portions of the day but they could still get a glimpse into our lives.

I passed my father's bedroom and paused, looking at the large double doors that were shut tight. The guard stationed outside frowned slightly as I stood still and stared at the room holding his sovereigns but didn't say anything. He wouldn't unless I was visibly in distress. He was my parents' guard – he couldn't say anything to me if it wasn't an emergency.

I thought of my grandmother Amberly again and how she would probably give anything to be here with us. She would also probably throttle me if she knew how I hadn't really spoken to my parents in days. I heard soft footsteps behind me and turned, half expecting see the ghost of Amberly there.

"Our bedroom is that way," Eikko said gently, pointing to the end of the corridor.

"We're lying about our baby," I whispered, mostly to myself.

He frowned. "Come again?"

"It's infuriating," I vented suddenly. "This baby isn't even born yet and we're already keeping secrets from her."

His frown grew but after a few moments he realized what I was going on about. "It's not a huge deal, Eadlyn. Not like kids are always curious about when and where they were conceived. And technically, we're lying to the people, not our baby."

I sighed, seeing his point. "It still feels wrong, planning secrets."

"But you're doing it to protect her," he reminded me. "There are far worse things to keep from your children than the fact that you were just barely pregnant before we were married."

"Where are you going with this Eikko?"

He folded his arms. "When Uncle Kile comes around for Christmas, will it be your top priority to tell our children that you dated him? Or what about Henri, when he makes cakes for our birthdays? I don't think you'll be rushing to tell them that you were once engaged."

"It's different though," I insisted.

"How?"

"I was allowed to date them. And Kile isn't taking vows to protect our children's lives."

"You weren't allowed to date me."

I stopped. It was east sometimes to forget that Eikko and I were a forbidden romance. He was there the whole time but we hadn't dated through that. It suddenly made even more sense to me, why Dad encouraged me to marry Eikko. Maybe he understood that love didn't have rules and that it required risks. He took risks for the people he loved: Brice, Miss Marlee and Mr. Woodwork…Mom. It probably wasn't a pretty conversation when he found out about Mom sneaking around with General Leger.

I huffed and approached their doors. The guard looked like he had no idea whether or not to stop me. "Eadlyn, where are you going?" Eikko asked cautiously.

I didn't answer. He had no choice to follow me into my father's bedroom. Bypassing their wall of pictures, I stopped at the foot of their bed. Mom stirred at the sounds of my entrance. When she noticed me lurking, she jumped and lightly tapped Dad on the shoulder to wake him.

"Eadlyn, what's wrong?" Mom asked, sitting up and blinking her eyes blearily.

"I'm sorry, I tried to stop her—" Eikko began but I waved to him to shut up.

"I don't understand why you two lied to me about General Leger but I can't argue with your logic. I know you both love each other a lot – sometimes too much. And you love your kids. I just don't want to hate you two for something that I will probably do to my own kids at some point."

Dad smiled slightly. "You couldn't have waited until morning to tell us this?" He turned on the light next to the bed.

"Nope."

Mom sighed. "Honey, you see, my relationship with Aspen complicated things for your father and me. It is all wrapped up with the massacre and my father…" She paused and put a hand to her mouth.

Dad put his arm around her. "It's not something we've ever explicitly discussed with you all because your mother and I still suffer from it." I knew that. I knew that Mom still would shake with anger when she talked about Celeste. I know that a few weeks after the massacre, Dad renovated the entire bottom floor of the palace so that where the Great Room used to be, there was no a mostly unused tearoom.

"The massacre…it's not just your grandparents that we mourn. I lost a maid and there are still days I find myself wishing for her steadiness," Mom admitted.

"And my advisor, Brennan?" Dad added, looking more at Mom as he spoke than Eikko and I. "He trained me even more than my father. In a way, he was a second father to me."

"And the Selected that we lost…there are days that I wish I had Celeste to call and be brutally honest with me. She could have ruled the world without even needing a crown or title. She deserved more than a library. I would have named an entire palace after her," Mom said, smiling tearfully, "but apparently it would look bad for the queen to name something so big after one of the king's ex-girlfriends."

Dad smiled with her. "You'll learn. What you decide for your children won't always seem right or easy, but you'll do anything to protect them. We had unchartered territory to navigate. Not only did we start out with twins at a somewhat young age, but no monarchs of Illéa had ever had so many kids." He winked at Mom, who then rolled her eyes.

"Yes, you did very well, Your Royal Husbandness," she said, patting his knee.

"Okay," I cut in before they could get too mushy. "Are we all good here? Reconciled and everything?"

"Yes," Dad laughed, "we're good, Eady."

Eikko took my hand. "You should get to bed. We'll see you in the morning." Mom and dad bid us sweet dreams and told me that they loved me on our way out. "I'm going back to the war room but you should get some sleep," he reinforced. His thumb brushed under my eyes where I knew I had dark circles. "Sleep in this morning."

I raised my eyebrows. "Sleep in?"

"Don't tell me you don't have time. I know you have the time. I've seen the amount of reports that have been on your desk in the morning the past few days – you can sleep an extra hour and still get everything done. Plus, it's your last morning without in-laws."

I groaned and wrinkled my nose. "Ugh, you're right. I guess the baby and I can go sleep for a little bit."

"I'll come wake you," he offered, his hand brushing around my belly button. It was definitely starting to get to be more noticeable that I was pregnant. My cute little bump was slowly starting to turn into a full-blown pregnant belly. I certainly wasn't fitting any of my clothes properly anymore. I could squeeze into some dresses that were more flowey than others but everything looked tight and made me look like I had gained more weight than I really had.

With the start of my second trimester, my energy had returned in leaps and bounds but I was still running a country, meaning that I was still in desperate need of a nap. Unlike before I was pregnant though, advisors were more than happy to let me take a nap if it meant that I was caring for the heir.

At two o'clock sharp, I was taken down to the front doors of the palace where Eikko was waiting beside my parents. I joined them at the top of the steps from the driveway, taking my spot next to Eikko and in front of my parents. "You look beautiful," he remarked as I smoothed my red satin dress nervously, just trying to find something to keep my hands busy.

"I look pregnant," I complained.

"And?" Eikko asked, sounding confused as to why my looking pregnant did not equal my looking beautiful.

"Your mother is going to be able to tell," I whispered, watching to make sure that none of the footmen were close enough to hear me. "She'll know as soon as she sees me that this baby was not conceived eleven weeks ago, like the country thinks. And when she figures that out, it will just prove that I'm a whore who corrupted her son and clearly has no self-control."

He choked on a laugh. I glanced over and the sight of him holding back his laughter made me crack a smile of my own. "There are worse things in life than my mother thinking that you're a whore."

"Like what?"

"Like," he stopped, trying to think of an answer. "Like if you were a vegetarian. My family would immediately disown me if I ever married a vegetarian. Or worse, a vegan."

"Your family, the butchers," I said, smiling still at the thought of it. "Don't worry. I am in no danger of becoming a vegetarian. Quite the opposite actually. I do love veal." Mom and Dad were laughing quietly behind us. "How are you two not freaking out right now?"

Mom rolled her eyes. "You forget that I tried to usurp my in-laws' power on live television before I even had a ring on my finger," she said, sliding her arm through Dad's. "Eikko's parents don't scare me."

"My dear, you wouldn't be scared of an army even if it camped out in the gardens," Dad said.

"As long as they cleaned up after themselves, I would permit them to stay as long as necessary. Honestly, I have very little fear with Aspen here as head of security. He'd never let anything bad happen to me."

"Except for the time you were shot," Dad argued.

I frowned and turned on them. "How do you two talk about that so casually?"

"Because I healed and didn't die," Mom answered.

"It was also the first time I'd ever seen your mother inebriated," Dad added.

My eyebrows rose. "The first time?"

At that moment the gates opened far down the drive and we could hear cars start rumbling on the gravel. I straightened my shoulders and faced forward, glancing sideways. Eikko was straightening the sleeves of his jacket and shirt, playing idly with his cufflinks. I broke custom and stepped in front of him to straighten his tie.

"You'll be fine," I whispered to him.

"I'm not normally wearing a custom-tailored suit when I see my family. I certainly can never expect footmen and maids to be waiting on them hand and foot while they're visiting," he mumbled.

I nodded and smoothed the lapels of his jacket unnecessarily. "You'll be able to go back to simple button-downs tomorrow."

"Until the Christmas ball in two days," he reminded me.

"Yes, well, I'll be wearing an incredibly uncomfortable dress that night while you're wearing your monkey suit," I said, winking.

The cars grew louder as they drove closer to the palace and I reclaimed my spot next to him. As per protocol, Eikko's parents would be in the first car and his sister and brother-in-law in the second car. General Leger claimed that the threat in Swendway wasn't severe enough for Eikko's cousins to be targeted, especially since his family wasn't easy to trace. Apparently farmers weren't as meticulous in keeping records of their family trees as royals were.

The nondescript black cars stopped in front of us, and the footmen opened the doors. Aulis was the first one out, looking at the footmen with a befuddled expression. He was wearing what I assumed was his best blazer and pants with a plain white button-down underneath. He stopped and held his hand out to Lennie so that she could get out. She was wearing a simple sundress with big green flowers on it.

They approached us, seeming unsure about how to act. "Eikko," Aulis greeted, holding his hand out stiffly.

"Isä," Eikko replied.

Lennie's eyes were watery as she took in the front façade of the palace, finally settling on Eikko nervously. "Eikko, your home…" Her voice trailed off as she looked up at it again.

"Well, I can't take any of the credit. It's all Eadlyn's family," he said. She smiled timidly. Sensing that someone needed to take a leap of faith, he stepped forward hugged his mother tightly. Her arms slowly wrapped around him and she clenched her eyes closed, seeming to be relieved to have her son back. " _Rakastan sinua, äiti_."

He said 'I love you'. I at least knew that much Finnish from him. Lennie wiped her eyes and faced me. "Eadlyn, thank you for inviting us to stay here," she said quietly.

"Of course, Lennie. You are family," I said. There was an awkward beat as she and Al stood in front of us. "Oh! Lennie, Al, these are my parents." I waved a hand back to my parents, standing still behind us.

"Your Majesties," Al greeted. Technically it wasn't proper for him to address them both at the same time but my parents would never dare correct someone who didn't know any better.

"Please, call me Maxon," Dad said, extending his hand.

"And I'm simply America," Mom added. She basically butted between Eikko and I to hug Lennie. Eikko's mother was clearly caught off-guard by my mom being so friendly but Mom was never really one to uphold rules in propriety.

Mom and Dad took Al and Lennie off to the side to continue speaking while Lahja and her husband exited their car. Lahja smiled widely when her eyes landed on Eikko but she surprised me by pulling me into a hug first. "Oh, congratulations, sister!"

I laughed in shock, naturally hugging her back. "Thank you, Lahja," I said to her. "This must be Kaarlo?" I asked, nodding to the man lingering behind her.

"Yes, this is my husband," she confirmed. She took his hand and pulled him toward us.

Kaarlo smiled and bowed slightly. "Hello, Your Majesty," he said to me.

"Call me, Eadlyn, please. I'd introduce you to my parents but they appear to be occupied," I said, peeking over to where they our parents were speaking in a mix of Finnish and English. Mom seemed to have some grasp of the language and Dad contributed what he could.

"Your parents can speak Finnish?" Lahja asked in amazement.

"Mom has a knack for languages – she knows bits of probably ten different languages and is fluent in four. Plus, Dad has family in Swendway as well. They've probably just learned stuff here and there from them," I explained.

"Of course. The royal family of Swendway are…what? Cousins?"

I nodded. "Very distant, but cousins nonetheless. I should really have you all introduced since you live in their country and are my in-laws."

Lahja waved her hand at us. "Please, don't concern yourself with that. We prefer living simply. There's no need for us to be caught up with royalty." She paused, seeming to catch how that could be misunderstood. "I mean, royalty that we are ever so slightly related to."

"I understand," I said sympathetically. "Let's head inside. We can show you to where you'll be staying."

Mom must have overheard me because she looked over and nodded. "Yes, please. I'm afraid our husbands are quickly going down the rabbit hole of American football," she said, steering Lennie toward us.

"Al has always been interested but had no one to explain the rules," Lennie said as we all proceeded up the steps.

The footmen inside the foyer were waiting for us and immediately took over for Mom and I, leading everyone to their guest rooms on the second floor. Eikko lightly pulled on my elbow and kept me back. "You okay?" he asked, his eyes darting between his parents and me.

"I'm tense," I admitted. "I'll feel better after they get settled and we find a routine with them. What about you?" He was my main concern at the moment.

"Well, that went better than I thought it would. But you're right. I'll breathe better in a few days," he agreed, rubbing my shoulder. "We don't need to go to dinner tonight, do we?"

I gave him a look. "Yes. Otherwise your sister and Kaarlo will be left on their own while our parents become best friends. Honestly, how did they do that? Your parents hate me and now they're on their way to being BFFs with the people who raised me."

Eikko laughed and held on to my hand as we followed behind his family and my parents at a slower pace. "They don't hate you. They just hate that I'm married to you and they don't trust how we fell in love. Maybe now that we've been married for a few months and we have a baby on the way, they'll go easier on us."

"Sounds like wishful thinking to me," I mumbled.

Over the next few days though, his parents were clearly making the effort to extend an olive branch. It was obvious though that my parents were the ones facilitating the reconciliation the most. Dad took Al, Eikko and Kaarlo hunting one afternoon while us ladies had a bit of a spa day. I didn't have that much time to spare and had to duck out earlier but I was at least getting to know my husband's family better. Lahja proved to be indispensable with her wealth of embarrassing childhood stories about Eikko.

The real test would be our Christmas ball. It had been tradition for the last fifteen years for Mom and Dad to host a ball on the twenty-third of December, celebrating with dignitaries and prominent politicians in Illéa. It was more of a state event than a ball honestly. Dad had used it multiple times to negotiate tax cuts with mayors and discuss trade deals with visiting monarchs. Part of me also always suspected that it was a big distraction for Mom since it was the anniversary of her father passing away.

As was custom, Dad started the evening off with a speech wishing everyone a wonderful holiday season and would showcase some of his terrible jokes if Mom hadn't read his speech beforehand. Eikko decided to give me the night off and took on Dad's role of doing the opening speech. The afternoon before the ball, after visiting the Great Room to make sure everything was in order, Eikko stood in our bedroom and read several different speeches for me.

I sat on the end of our bed, listening patiently while eating some of the food that would be served that night in my silk robe. I never got the chance to eat a lot at these types of things since people always wanted to talk to me. Apparently, it didn't matter whether or not queens ate when foreign policy was on the table. My hair and makeup was done. All I needed to do what it was time to get ready was put on my dress and crown. He was wearing his dress pants but just his undershirt. What he didn't know about his outfit for the night was that it included one of his Christmas presents from me: a shiny new, personally designed crown.

"What did you think?" he asked apprehensively.

I raised my eyebrows. I hadn't realized that I was so focused on the pumpkin bread pudding on my plate that I stopped listening. "Um…"

"You didn't listen," he said in defeat.

"No," I admitted. "So it must be boring."

He groaned. "Eadlyn, I need to figure out my speech. The ball begins in an hour."

"Okay, okay. Pass me your cards." He handed me the small stack of index cards he had been holding. There were several different colors in the stack with each of his speeches being color-coded. I quickly scanned them. "The green one is way too dry. The blue one sounds a bit like you're trying too hard to promote world peace."

"World peace is a good thing, right?"

"You're speaking to a room full of kings, presidents, and ambassadors. Most of those people are currently are war with either North Africa or New Asia. Do not stand up in front of them and tell them that this is the time of year to…" I stopped as I looked for the right quote. "…'lay down arms and be united in felicity'. Who wrote that?" I asked in disgust.

"Me."

My eyes flicked up to meet his apologetically. "Sorry. Can't a simple Merry Christmas suffice?"

"Did your dad ever simply wish everyone a merry Christmas?"

"No, but you're not my dad."

Eikko chewed on his lips in frustration, not looking even in my direction as he contemplated that. "Am I not? I don't know who I'm supposed to be, honestly. Your father was the king, of course I'll never be him. Your mom…she was her own queen. I wear your father's crowns, sit on your mother's thrones; what is my legacy?"

"You're Eikko Koshinen de Schreave."

"Eadlyn, no one recognizes my last name. Do you see the papers? I'm simply Prince Eikko de Schreave. I'm your shadow."

I put my fork and plate down on our bed and slid to the floor, crossing the room to stand in front of him. He still wasn't meeting my eyes so I put my hand on his cheek to direct his gaze toward me. "Hey, remember that time I told you that all I'll ever be is Her Majesty the Queen? And you told me that I'm Eadlyn and that I mean infinitely more to you?" I shook my head. "I don't remember the exact words but you told me that I'm so much more than a queen to you. You're more than my prince consort."

"Then help me write a speech that proves it. I don't want to be some mannequin in a suit that has no feelings," he said, his voice bordering on desperation.

I sighed and went back to where the note cards were on the duvet. "The yellow speech." He seemed surprised but I pressed them into his hands. "Trust me."

There was a soft knock on the door. "Your Majesty?"

"Come in," I called back to Eloise.

She curtsied when she entered, dressed in her finest uniform. Maids changed uniforms with the seasons and any current events occurring. They wore light blue in the spring and black during the week following a death in the royal family. For the holidays, they wore a deep blue but right around Christmas they had navy dresses with silver embroidery around the collars and sleeves. "We must get you ready for the ball now, ma'am."

"Thank you Eloise. I'll meet you in my closet." I turned to face Eikko again. "You'll be okay?"

"Just stay with me," he said.

"Even while I'm getting dressed?" I couldn't help but ask, feeling slightly mischievous. After all, we'd had an excessive amount of time together over the last few days and it made me all the more grateful for marrying such a wonderful man, not mention more attracted to him when I realized how much I was missing out on everyday.

He smirked and kissed my forehead. "As much as I would like to say yes, no. I'll have to meet my butler and finish getting ready myself. I'll find you when I'm done since I will probably finish before you."

"Probably." I kissed him one last time and walked to my closet where Eloise was opening the various jewelry boxes that had been brought up from the vault earlier in the day. "Nothing too much, right? I wouldn't want to outshine the Christmas tree." Really I didn't want to look too gaudy in front of Eikko's parents.

Eloise had me put on the silk slip that would go underneath my gown as she unzipped the garment bag. Inside was an exquisite black, empire waist gown with red, gold and green embellishments on the shoulders and the ends of the long, sheer sleeves. A black silk belt with more jeweled accents in one cluster would go at the top of my waist, right above where my belly was protruding.

"Eloise, it's gorgeous," I gushed. I lifted it into my hands, feeling how light the fabric was with on my fingertips and nearly groaning in pleasure. I could already tell that it would keep me nice and cool throughout a long night of dancing in a heated warm.

Eloise blushed. "Thank you, ma'am. Neena and Paige assisted me with the design. Paige has been helping me quite a bit with designing dresses that will flatter your new figure."

"Well, let's see how it fits then," I said excitedly.

It fit spectacularly. It was probably the most beautiful I had felt since starting to gain weight. Eloise was fastening my gold earrings in when Eikko knocked on the door to my closet. He whistled as his eyes swept me up and down. I blushed and waited for him to say something but he was apparently struggling for words with the way his mouth kept opening and closing. Finally he coughed and said, "Eloise, you're torturing me."

"I would never do such a thing," Eloise squeaked out. "I'm merely making my queen look her best." She opened the larger box that housed the gold tiara I would be wearing. It was a gold tiara with diamonds and rubies set in it. Mom said it was one of the first tiaras given to her by my father after they got married. It was smaller than most of my tiaras but for some reason, I always felt my most royal when I wore it.

"Hey, Eadlyn, I'm not complaining or anything because they are massively uncomfortable but, where's my crown?" Eikko asked awkwardly.

"Eloise, did you bring up that package I asked you to?"

Eloise put the last pin in place to hold my tiara on and stepped away to admire her work. "I put it on your bookshelf, ma'am."

I turned and smiled to Eikko innocently. "Check the bookshelf."

He came back a few moments later, a large red box in his hands. "Eadlyn…" he began, sounding suspicious and slightly confused.

I stepped away from my mirror and took the box from him, lifting the lid toward me so that he could see it. He gasped slightly as he took in the new gold crown that matched my tiara with its diamond and ruby accents. "You're not my father so I figured that it's time you start building your own crown collection. You have the one from your coronation but you can't exactly where that thing to a state dinner. This one is a bit more casual and it matches mine."

Eikko took a deep breath, his fingers brushing over the gold as he stared at the crown in my hands. "Let's see how it fits," Eloise said from behind me. She placed her gloves on again that were specifically designated for handling our jewelry and carefully placed the crown on Eikko's head, twisting it until it settled on his dark curls. "Perfect."

I smiled as he reached up and touched it, testing out the feel of it. "Perfect," I repeated.

Eloise started fastening the crown with the same pins she used for my tiaras, carefully moving his curls in and out of the way so that they weren't matted down. When she was finished, she stepped away to inspect both of us. "Well, I believe you're both ready for the ball."

We stood by the entrance to the Great Room and greeted every single guest. It was considered proper to arrive on time so that guests could speak with us. Anyone arriving late would miss the chance to meet us. When it was time for the ball to officially get under way, Eikko and I walked to the front of the room where the orchestra was playing on a platform. He took his spot behind the microphone and I stayed down off the platform, standing with my mom and his parents. I thought I had seen Dad running around somewhere with his cousins kids.

"Don't you want to be up there with him?" Mom asked me as the musicians stopped playing and the room turned to face Eikko, waiting for him to start speaking.

"No," I answered, not once taking my eyes off of him. "This is his moment." Her hand wrapped around my elbow comfortingly as she beamed at me.

"Good evening," Eikko said, digging one hand in his pocket while holding both his index cards and champagne in the other. "Thank you all for attending this small, intimate gathering," he said, eliciting a few quiet chuckles from the guests. "Most of you have actually spent more Christmases at the palace than I have so, good on you. Christmas is actually one of my favorite times of the year. Growing up, my parents always volunteered to work at the immigrant community center, where we would serve people a warm dinner for the evening and sing traditional Swendish carols. We just wanted to make everyone feel at home, especially those who had spent so much to move here and then had so little to celebrate with. This year, I don't want that tradition to end. My parents and I may be here at the palace for this Christmas but I still want to make someone's holiday season special. I would like to encourage all of you, here tonight, to donate to a local community center. It can be anything: food, clothes, games, or toys. Just do something good for someone this year and maybe by taking this small step toward loving everyone and making our beautiful country even better." Murmurs echoed through the room as Eikko raised his glass. "Here's to a very merry Christmas with those we love and those we ought to love just a little bit more."

Everyone else followed suit and toasted. My heart swelled with pride as Mom took a small sip of champagne. A guard was standing just a few feet from her. Apparently, right after the massacre, Dad had commanded for Mom to always have a guard close by her just in case. I remembered her always having a guard nearby when I was really little but I guess that once she had Kaden and had to be moving around so much chasing us through the palace, that died down. Since her heart attack though, Dad had reinstituted it. Tonight it came in handy so that she could pass her flute off to him after taking a couple sips.

"That was…" she stopped, words failing her for once.

"It was fantastic," I supplied her.

She looked at me, tears in her eyes. "Eadlyn, I don't know how many of these people will actually take his advice but those who will…people's lives will be changed because of it. I can't believe we didn't have cameras here to show that speech to the world."

"That's exactly why he gave that speech tonight. He didn't want to do it in front of the cameras. It's not about the publicity for him. He really just wants to make the world a better place."

"We never thought of doing that," Mom said pensively.

"And you wouldn't have. Eikko had a different upbringing than even you. It's made him into a different person, a different ruler. It's because of your work to establish all of those community centers that he can even do this." I put a hand on her shoulder while watching Eikko come toward me out of the corner of my eye. "You and Dad did so many great things for this country. Let us have our turn."

She laughed and sniffed, blinking back tears. "If you say so. Now, I need to go find your father so that we can have our dance."

I turned in time for Eikko to sneak an arm around my waist, pulling me close. I could see how nervous he was with the way that his smile was tight on his face. "How was that?"

"Just how you practiced," I said, pecking him on the lips.

"Do you think people will actually do it?" he asked, this seeming to be what he was worried about most.

"Not everyone, but there are plenty of generous and altruistic guests here tonight. My mom said that no matter how many people donate, lives will be changed because of that speech." I reached up and smoothed some of his curls away from his face and he started chuckling. "What?"

"Nothing. That's just a very maternal touch you have there."

I sighed and tried to be annoyed but he was smiling so adorably that I couldn't not smile back. "Get used to it."

The conductor of the small orchestra that was providing our music for the evening tapped his stand, calling the room to attention for the first dance. "That's our cue," Eikko said, pulling me to the middle of the floor. He tucked his cards into his breast pocket and we assumed a traditional ballroom frame, ready for an easy waltz. He wasn't quite comfortable with the steps like I was since I had been doing waltzes my whole life but he was definitely starting to catch on more.

As we spun around the floor with what felt like the eyes of the world upon us, he whispered, "Next year, I'll get to dance with both of my girls."

"How do you know we are having a girl?" I asked.

"You called the baby a she the other night. It felt right," he answered simply. "Do you think it's a girl? Any mother's intuition?"

"I wouldn't call it mother's intuition. More like…an inevitability."

"Inevitability?" he repeated.

"It seems only right that with your obsession over me, you'd end up with a family full of daughters," I told him.

He shrugged slightly but not so much that our frame would be thrown off. "I'm sure your parents thought the same thing."

"No, I don't think so. You see, my parents lives are defined by irony. It's only right that they amended the laws of inheritance, had a girl as their firstborn, and then followed it up by three boys."

"Ironic, huh? You don't see anything ironic about marrying someone not in your Selection?"

I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes. I simply leaned forward, closer than we should have been for a waltz. It was the holiday season though. I figured that if we could get away with being a bit more touchy than usual, it would be during the time of year where families naturally grew closer. "Not at all."

In the midst of our conversation, Mom and Dad had joined us on the dance floor, sharing the first dance with us. They had completely abandoned the steps for the waltz though. Mom had never been much of a dancer. I guess since they weren't ruling anymore and bound by such strict rules of propriety, they didn't care to try to dance properly. They simply swayed together, having their own private conversation like us.

The song ended and Eikko bowed to me, a simple nod of his head, and then we moved off of the floor in pursuit of his parents. "There are so many people here," I said as we walked. "It feels like more than usual."

"We greeted every guest. All one hundred and seventeen of them," he said. He was looking around though, frowning slightly.

"Did we say hi to that guy with the mustache?"

"Isn't that Lord Ivan of New Asia?"

"No, Lord Ivan hibernates during the winter. He only comes to summer parties. I don't think we greeted that guy."

Eikko placed his hand on my back, guiding me along. "Well, he must have snuck in late."

"How rude," I muttered.

Lennie and Lahja were standing off to the side, clearly feeling out of place but putting on brave faces anyway. "Mom, Lahja, you both look beautiful," Eikko said. He gave both of them chaste cheek kisses when we reached them, even stopping to embrace Lahja.

"Eikko, tell me that you party like this every week," Lahja said, her eyes wide as she took in the sparkling Great Room.

Eikko coughed out a laugh. "No, thank goodness. It's exhausting. This is actually one of our most casual balls of the year since we only invite our closest allies and friends. We don't have as much of an obligation to speak with everyone."

"There are over one hundred people here easily," Lennie said, eyes sweeping the crowd nervously.

"My family has a lot of friends," I answered. "Where are Kaarlo and Al?"

Lennie laughed slightly. "Your father mentioned something about introducing them to that quarterback that's here."

"Oh, perfect." The invite list was kept primarily to people involved with politics or business but Dad did have a pension for coercing Mom to invite pro football players. Apparently Eikko had kept them on the list.

Raelynn approached me, her most formal clipboard in hand, and put a hand on my shoulder. "Your Majesty, there are some people that you must dance with before the night is over and seeing as you were planning on leaving early…"

"Right. Let's get it over with." I waved goodbye to Lennie and Lahja and squeezed Eikko's hand before moving toward the fringes of the dance floor. "Who do we have for tonight?"

"Your mother has spared you from dancing with Mayor Pulk but you do need to dance with Count Vernon of Calais," Raelynn informed me, checking her list. "And we will go from there."

I spotted Count Vernon in the opposite corner and approached him, offering my hand to him in a dance. From there on, I danced with about four nobles and two ambassadors, quickly losing track of conversations. Luckily, for Christmas, we didn't need to discuss anything too serious. Just a lot of family anecdotes and hearing people's plans for the holiday season. As the night wore on, more guests started whisking me into dances. Raelynn gave me a thumbs-up from afar, assuring me that I was doing an excellent job of spreading the love.

Then I was spun into a new set of arms.

Suddenly, I was looking up into the eyes of my new partner: Marid Illéa. The trimmed beard and slicked back hair provided him with a good enough disguise. My blood still boiled as soon as his hand pressed against my waist.

"Good evening, Your Majesty," he greeted, smiling widely at him.

"What are you doing here, Marid?" I growled through gritted teeth. The dance floor was packed with couples doing a more complicated version of the waltz and I was in the center, making it practically impossible for anyone to get a good eye on myself and my partner. I could only hope that guards were watching the camera directly overhead, planted in the chandelier and that they could recognize Marid through that. More importantly, the crowd made it impossible for me to escape. As I looked around, with a strike of panic, I realized that I didn't recognize half of the people dancing. They were Marid's posse, sneaking in late to the party throughout the night so that they could be a curtain for him.

"I thought that the time has come for us to talk," he said as if he was reporting the weather for the week.

I snorted. "You've done plenty of talking, believe me. I'm not sure there's much more that needs to be said except for my reminding you that you are wanted by dozens of municipalities throughout Illéa for treason."

His eyebrows drew together as a mocking portrayal of seriousness covered his face. "Well, it does appear that way yet the public still worships me. Any reason for you being terrified of announcing me as a public shame to the throne?"

"I'm sure you know my reasons."

"Sure, but it is still working in my favor. Tell me, Eadlyn—"

"—Your Majesty—"

"—what exactly are your plans for this election for prime minister?"

My heart sunk down into my stomach. "What?"

"The election that will occur in a little under two years from now. The election that any prominent member of Illéa could run for Prime Minister and maybe even win, thus giving them the power to rule over Illéa while you stroll through fields of wildflowers with your beloved husband and child."

"That's not how it's going to work. The Prime Minister will have responsibility for domestic affairs while the monarchy continues to—"

"—shmooze with all of your friends in Europe while pretending to be arranging trade negotiations?"

"No," I said firmly.

Marid ignored me and kept plowing on. "You know, I initially thought that this constitutional monarchy thing was a bad idea. It looked like something that you were doing just to put more people between the common citizen and the royal line. Now, though, I've realized that I can get closer than ever. You may feel insulated by this new government, Queenie, but you have actually allowed me to get to this position that is right next to you, your closest confidante and partner. Maybe even closer than your prince consort."

Through a break in heads and shoulders, I caught a glimpse of Eikko and he was frowning in both concern and confusion, as if he couldn't believe what he was seeing. _Please, Eikko, go find a guard. Get me out of here,_ I pleaded with my eyes. Marid was quick to spin me away. "You can't become Prime Minister," I told him.

"Why not? In case you haven't noticed yet, the people love me. They will vote for me. Whoever you put up against me, I will crush them in a popularity contest."

"Why do you want to do this? You said you don't want the crown. Why PM?"

He pulled me close so that I was completely flush against him, his arm trapping me there. It was too tight and not comfortable at all. My stomach was smashed between us and I couldn't get full breaths. "Because it is time for you royals to realize that you cannot continue to bully us. We will rise up and overwhelm you, just like my parents did. It's time you learn what it's like to be the one that's oppressed relentlessly. I'm a ruler of the people. You're nothing but a figurehead that's dressed up for photo ops and good press."

"You'll never get away with this," I hissed.

"Princess," he murmured like he was singing a lullaby. "You said that last May and here I am, standing in your home, surrounded by a dozen of my most faithful followers, a war raging across the ocean, and on the verge of being elected by the people to rule them. Forgive me for not believing you."

"You're surrounded by royal guards that are under orders to kill you on site."

"And what a tragedy that would be," he sang out. There was no more humor in his eyes, only a passive hostility. "Ah, right on time. It's time for me to take my leave."

"What?" I asked, drawing my face back further to try to discern what he was saying.

Behind me, a woman shouted. "Help! Help, my husband is having a heart attack!"

Those words struck like lightning through the Great Room. With a queen who had just had a heart attack, every head in the room turned to find the source of the commotion. Suddenly I was able to breathe again and I turned, nothing but air left where Marid had just been standing, suffocating me slowly.

Eikko sprinted to my side. "Where'd he go?" I gasped out, my hand fluttering to my neck as I took full breaths again.

"Who?"

"Marid. He was just here!" I exclaimed. Tears swelled in my eyes as my frustration grew. He was right there in front of me. How could he have gotten away? My answer was found in the corner where the woman who had shouted for help was surrounded by nearly every guard in the room.

General Leger emerged from the crowd and came toward us. "Not a heart attack, just heart burn. Jesus, how do you mix up the two?" he asked, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Arrest them both," I ordered, not taking my eyes off of the woman. Eikko's hand closed around my elbow.

"Eadlyn—"

"Arrest them," I repeated when none of the guards around me were moving. "Marid was just here. That was a diversion created by him so that he could escape."

General Leger gasped, his anger palpable. "Marid was _here_?"

"Right here, dancing with me, trying to suffocate me. Those two were part of it!" I cried, pointing at the woman. Guests were starting to look in my direction, more curious about what was disturbing the queen than whatever health problems that woman's supposed husband was facing.

"Eadlyn, let's go into the alcove," Eikko suggested as he sensed a full breakdown coming on. He didn't leave me much of a choice though. He dragged me to the side door of the Great Room that had guards stationed around it, a private alcove meant purely for royal family members to escape to if they needed to touch up their makeup or take a break from the madness of parties. He sat me down on a plush couch and knelt in front of me, my face tight in both of his hands. "Are you okay?"

I nodded. "Think so."

"Did he hurt you?"

I shook my head, looking down into my lap. "He just was holding me so tight. I felt like I couldn't breathe and the baby…" I started sobbing, collapsing forward to fold over my legs. He sat next to me on the sofa, both of his arms coming around me as I swayed and sobbed. "He hates us so much. I don't know what I did or how I can make it better."

"We won't let him get away with this," Eikko vowed. "We'll get him, Eadlyn. He's here in Angeles. It's a mousetrap for him. We can get him this time."

"I really hope we do," I said, meeting his eyes, "because I don't know if our country can handle it if he gets free again."


	23. Chapter 23

It was only eight days before I was donning another gown for another ball. Eloise brushed one last layer of sheer over my collarbone and I glanced toward Eikko's closet to see if he was ready yet. He was just pulling on his suit jacket and adjusted his bow tie to make sure it was straight. His butler started putting on his cuff links for him. Eloise retrieved my jewelry and fastened it lightly behind my neck.

"Who is hosting this party?" Eikko asked.

"Sir Lucas Clark. He's Brice's personal adviser and a really nice man. He hosted a party for New Year's a few years ago and it was a smash," I explained slowly, checking the clasp of my bracelet to make sure it was tight.

Eikko grinned. "A smash?"

"What?"

"Nothing." He waved off his butler and joined me in my closet. "So we get to be guests tonight?"

"Yes. Even better, our parents can celebrate here on their own. Thank you Eloise, you are dismissed. Have a wonderful New Year's Eve." Eloise curtsied and disappeared through a side door in my closet, a small smile on her lips as she saw Eikko hug me tightly.

"Are you sure your parents are okay with us leaving? They seemed a little down at breakfast," he commented.

I grabbed my clutch from the dresser and checked to make sure that my private cell phone and lipstick were tucked safely inside. "This is a hard time of year for them. The anniversary of the massacre was only a couple days ago. They'll be back to their normal selves after the memorial tomorrow."

For the first few years I could remember, the memorial for the massacre was on the actual anniversary but Mom and Dad moved it to New Year's Day, saying that they hated having to do Christmas, then a memorial, then New Year's. Brice also told me one time that Dad thought it was more symbolic to start the year by remembering those we lost in the past and finding hope in a better tomorrow.

"We should go," I said, embracing him one last time before making my way to the door. "The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave."

Eikko laughed and held the door open for me. He clapped the shoulder of the guard posted outside and said, "I like the way you think, woman."

General Leger was waiting by the car that would be driving us to the event. "You have your cell phone, right?" he checked.

"Yes," I sighed. "Just like I always do when I go out in public."

General Leger smiled appreciatively. "I know it seems silly because you've never had to use it but in case there's an emergency or we need to contact you about something urgent, you need to have it."

"I know, I know. Thank you."

"Have fun tonight, Eadlyn. You deserve it." He hugged me quickly and then shut us inside the car.

As our driver was given last minute orders from General Leger, I looked out the window at the wall protecting the palace from the outside. With a start, I realized that I hadn't stepped foot outside that wall since I had returned from Panama four months prior. How quickly I had gotten sucked into being queen and doing work – I had completely forgotten to observe the outside world. I shivered as we passed through the gate. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. I was supposed to be the queen that changed things, not just do what every monarch did before me.

"Are you okay?" Eikko asked, sensing that I was on edge.

"Fine," I growled. It wasn't fair for me to take my frustration out on him. I was more frustrated with myself than anyone else. My ultimate goal of being queen was to get the monarchy closer to the people and my first anniversary of queen was fast approaching and I had only managed to distance myself from my people even more but instituting a government with more tiers than before.

There wasn't a solution to this though. General Leger barely gave us permission to attend this party. The only reason he did finally agree was because an adviser was hosting and there would be palace guards there already. An added dozen of guards was no-biggie, apparently. With my being pregnant and the war raging across the ocean, he would never let me go out for public events like library dedications and hospital visits.

Eikko pressed on though, starting to get concerned by my attitude. "Is it Marid?"

I shook my head. "No." Although Marid was still a problem. He had slipped through our fingers again. There was no permanent damage done by his visit but he had gotten into the palace. He was in the Great Room. He danced with me, held me, and still got away from us. "I'm just tired. My body is definitely starting to feel the effects of pregnancy now."

"We don't need to stay at the party for long, tonight. Heck, we could leave before midnight if you wanted," he offered even though due to protocol, I was the one who decided when we arrived and when we left. Well, I decided and then the guards would take a half hour to make sure it was clear for me to leave.

I leaned forward and tapped the guard in the front seat on the shoulder. "Tell General Leger that I would like to leave at 11:30," I told him. "There, now we can watch the fireworks together on our balcony."

"Fireworks?"

"The Angeles Fire Department has a huge firework display up in the hills. It's massive. It was always my favorite thing about New Year's as a kid."

"And now?"

I smiled as I considered it, our car pulling up to the front of Sir Lucas's house. "Well, for the last few years it's been the champagne but seeing as I can't drink champagne this year, I'd have to say it's my handsome date tonight."

Eikko laughed. "Good one." A guard opened the door for me and I slid out, walking to the doors of the home. It was large and ostentatious compared to normal homes in Angeles but the advisers all lived rather comfortably. Sir Lucas bought the home from another adviser several years prior and held a New Year's party to celebrate it. He was in the foyer, greeting his guests but judging from the sway he had, he was several drinks into the night.

"Am I about to see all of our advisers drunk?" Eikko asked.

"Not all of them. Just most of them."

We greeted Sir Lucas, keeping it brief. Then we proceeded into one of the front parlors, guests starting to swarm around us as we caught the attention of the room. Everyone who hadn't had too much champagne yet bowed and curtsied. Some wobbled and nearly took a tumble but seeing a room full of my colleagues sloppy with alcohol was entertaining enough for me to not turn my nose up at them.

Brice suddenly flung herself into my arms, a glass of white wine in her hand. "Happy New Year!" she sang in my ear. I looked her up and down, trying to figure out if she was drunk or not. She could clearly tell what I was thinking. "I'm not drunk, just excited to see a familiar face."

"How are the wives?" I asked her, nodding to the corner of the room where the wives of the advisers all were congregated.

"Insufferable. If I hear one more conversation revolving around plastic surgery or the outrageous prices of private schools, I might actually have to get drunk."

"Duly noted. What are they saying about private schools though? We just adjusted the policies for how provincial governments can lower the costs," I said, that being the part that caught my attention.

Brice rolled her eyes. "You're supposed to not be working tonight. Don't worry about it."

I tried to take her advice but the truth was, I would have happily been back at the palace worrying about mundane queen things in lieu of having to interact with drunk advisers all night. After my realization that I had essentially abandoned my people, I was in no mood to party with the same people I saw everyday and their snooty wives who looked at me skeptically every time I told them that I was thirteen weeks along.

Eikko left me at one point to get drinks and I was swallowed up in a group of the wives. They talked about their vacations they had taken and how lovely the beaches were in Sonage at this time of year were. One woman was even talking about the yacht that her husband owned. I couldn't remember which adviser she was married to but I certainly was curious about which adviser had the means to own a yacht. I peeked over at Eikko, desperate for a rescue, when one of our guards approached him and whispered something in his ear. His face blanched and he immediately made eye contact with me.

Officer Wells came up to me with my purse. "Phone call, ma'am," he told me briefly. "I've secured a place for you to speak privately." I followed him to a study that was shut away from the party. Several guards were standing outside the door but Officer Wells was the only one to come inside the study with me.

I snapped open my purse and read the number on the screen of my phone, puzzled over who it was. It was an international number. "Who is this?" I asked Officer Wells.

"The prime minister of New Asia," he answered, his voice tense. For good reason. If the New Asian prime minister was calling me at what would be very early in the morning for him, it was not good news.

"Prime Minister Xang, this is Queen Eadlyn," I said as I flipped open my phone.

"Queen Eadlyn, you are a difficult woman to reach."

I chewed on my lip, well aware of the various hoops you had to jump through to reach my secure line. "What can I help you with, Prime Minister Xang?"

"I just have a few questions for you, Your Majesty," he replied in a curt tone. "I'm not interrupting anything too terribly important, am I?"

"No, not at all." _In fact, you've saved me from a party I was loathing._ But New Asia didn't celebrate New Year's until later in January. "I would be glad to answer any of your questions."

"Well, I was wondering if you have read the treaty lately? Or if your father has reviewed with you since you became queen? Just so I can know whether or not you are aware of the conditions and terms that your country agreed to when the war ended."

I frowned, leaning against a desk. "I am very familiar with the treaty, I can assure you of that, Sir."

"Then you would know that according to section six, item two, you are forbidden from putting Illéan boots on New Asian soil."

"I do know that."

"Explain this to me Queen Eadlyn: why am I looking at images of Illéan soldiers camping in Vilnu, a New Asian territory in Eastern Europe?"

My heart stopped and I was confident that every bit of blood in my body froze. Officer Wells noticed my alarm and took a step toward me but I held up a hand to stop him. "I'm sorry?"

"Don't tell me you are unaware of this."

"There must be some sort of confusion, Prime Minister Xang. The only soldiers I've deployed to Europe are in France, working for the emergency aid corps to protect civilians," I said, trying to sound calm and professional.

He chuckled. "I think you are the confused one, my good queen. These images clearly display the Illéan flag. You do have a purple flag and gold flag, correct? And your soldiers appear to be celebrating, which only Illéa, France, England, and Italy have a holiday on this day." I had no response as my mind instantly started going through lists of advisers that could have done this. "You've broken your end of the treaty, Queen Eadlyn. As per the conditions of the treaty, any breach on Illéa's end results in immediate termination. Do you remember that part as well?"

"Yes," I said through gritted teeth.

"Then I must inform you that we are upholding that condition and the treaty is thusly terminated. You can no longer consider New Asia as an ally of Illéa. Have a wonderful night, Queen Eadlyn."

"No, wait—" The line went dead and the phone slipped from my hand. I put a hand to my stomach, fighting back the vile rising in my throat.

"Your Majesty?" Officer Wells called, looking more concerned by the second.

"I need Eikko," I choked out.

It was silent enough in the study that I could hear General Leger speaking urgently in Officer Wells's radio, communicating a message from the palace. " _New Asia terminated the treaty. We discussed our plan for this happening in our morning briefing. You all know what to do. Officer Wells, secure the queen. Officer Cameron will secure the consort._ "

Officer Wells stepped forward and started pulling me through the party again. I let him lead me though because the room was swimming around me and my knees felt like they were made of gelatin. Our car was waiting with a heavily armed SUV behind it as our tail. Eikko was already inside when I slid into the back seat.

He looked troubled but not confused. "I heard."

I had hundreds of questions but no idea where to begin. I didn't even know what to do when I got back to the palace. Every part of my tired body wanted me to go to bed but one of Illéa's biggest former enemies just ended our peace treaty with them – I would not be sleeping for the rest of the night, not if I was lucky.

"I don't understand how this happened, how Illéan soldiers ended up in Vilnu. None of my advisers have that kind of power and General Leger…he watched Dad fight tooth and nail for that treaty, he would never dare to risk terminating it," I said as our car started racing through the streets of Angeles. I needed to talk through this. It was the only way for me to clear my thoughts. "Why Vilnu? I know that New Asian troops and North African troops are occupying Swendway but its not an ideal location to protect England and France so they must be there for…" My voice trailed off. Aside from myself and General Leger, there was only one other person with the power to move soldiers around the globe. I looked sideways to Eikko who appeared to be avoiding eye contact at all costs. "Tell me you didn't."

Silence fell in the car as I stared him down, waiting for him to say something. He took several breaths. It felt like all of the air was slowly being sucked from the car as the full weight of betrayal started sitting on my chest. "Swendway is an ally to Illéa. If we continued to do nothing, they would have been lost to New Asia—"

"New Asia is a stronger enemy to Illéa than Swendway is an ally!" I exploded. "Do you have any idea what you've done?" I demanded as the car stopped in front of the palace. At least a dozen guards were waiting on the palace steps. General Leger and Officer Wells both held their arms above me as I stormed from the car to the front doors. I didn't turn around until I heard the doors close behind Eikko. "Well? Do you?"

"Eadlyn, I'm trying to protect you, protect us. Please, see my reasoning in this. If Swendway lost power to New Asia, France would be surrounded by their enemy. I was doing what was best for us and for your brother."

"You didn't consult me at all, Eikko. How is that supposed to do any good for me? Instead, I get a phone call from the New Asian prime minister, informing me of everything my husband has been doing behind my back?" I exclaimed. "How could you do this? How did you do this?"

"I met with General Leger," he said simply.

I pointed at the general, who happened to be walking through the foyer at that moment. He stopped, standing halfway between Eikko and I. "You are involved with this?"

"Eadlyn, listen to Eikko," General Leger pleaded.

"You do not tell your queen what to do!" I yelled at him, focusing again on my husband, still standing twenty feet from me.

Eikko licked his lips as he carefully considered his next words. There were footsteps from the top of the steps and I just knew that it was my family, probably alerted already to what was happening and wanting to check on us. "You don't see what I see, Eadlyn," Eikko said gently.

"And what do you see?" I growled, making it plenty clear that he better think good and hard about what he said to me next.

"I see the way the advisers influence every decision you make here. They've backed you into a corner, Eadlyn. They've told you that we can't get involved in a war but I talked to General Leger and your father and they both agreed—"

"You talked to my father about this?!" I turned to face Dad, who I knew was standing at the top of the steps. I was seeing red with as furious as I was. Mom smacked Dad's arm from where she stood beside him but his face was stony, giving away nothing. I faced Eikko again. "What about the advisers?"

"Eadlyn, look around you. Ask yourself why you haven't acted yet. It's because the advisers told you not to. Why did you simply send relief to French victims of the war? Because the advisers told you to. Why did you lie to the country about how pregnant you are? Because the advisers told you to. You have become their puppet – they're running the country Eadlyn, not you."

My breathing picked up and I tried to take deep breaths to control my heartbeat but I couldn't. I was actually going to self implode on the marble steps in the foyer of my palace. "How dare you?" I screamed. "How dare you stand in front of me and accuse me of that!"

"You're angry because you know it's true!"

"I'm angry because you've suddenly decided that you are more powerful than your queen and did something without even thinking of consulting me first," I corrected him. I couldn't tolerate being in his presence so I spun and started ascending the steps, feeling every eye in the room on me. Every guard, family member, maid, and footmen in the foyer was still as a statue.

"I am your consort, you know. I can do more than pick out china patterns for state dinners."

I stopped at the top of the steps. Mom and Dad moved to the side so that they were out of my way. I turned and looked down at Eikko, my husband, my prince, and apparently my own worst enemy. "You married me to be a husband, not a king."

"I married you to be married to Eadlyn, not the shell of a queen you've become. I'm trying to help you, Eadlyn."

"I don't think Henri would be trying to _help_ me, do you?" I snapped. It was a low blow. I knew it was a low blow but it came out and the hurt he felt was clear. No one dared to follow me as I stormed the rest of the way up to the third floor. The sound of my bedroom door slamming closed probably echoed through the whole palace.

The silence in my room choked out the sobs I had been holding in for the last twenty minutes. I perched on the edge of my bed, trying to catch my breath. There was a loud boom behind me and the wall opposite my balcony illuminated green and blue as fireworks lit up the sky. I walked to my balcony and stopped at the railing. Fireworks exploded above me.

The war I had been trying so hard to avoid was now coming, running to my borders. At that very moment, people were celebrating the New Year. From my balcony, I could just barely hear the celebrations from down on the basement-level patio where the maids and guards were celebrating. Lovers were kissing, kids were dancing, it was a time for happiness and zeal. Not a time to be preparing for war.

I remained on the balcony, watching the fireworks, as Eikko went through our room and got ready for bed. Only after hearing the small click of his bedside lamp turning off did I leave my balcony, strip down to my slip, and join him in bed, facing the wall and not my husband.

* * *

The only time of the year, every year, where the entire royal family ever left the palace was on the first of the year for the memorial. We were always dressed in black. Mom and I carried bouquets of white roses to lay in the mausoleum where my grandparents were buried. There were no crowns. Photographers were always lined up along the fence to take pictures of us at our most vulnerable.

This was never where our family mourned anyway. It was always hard for me to shed tears on this day because I wasn't alive for it. I didn't live through that fear and I didn't have to go through the loss of people I knew and loved. Not like Mom and Dad. Dad was far more emotional about these visits than Mom because it was primarily for his parents but he hadn't cried openly here for several years.

The memorial this year was different, borderline uncomfortable. Ahren was gone from our stronghold and Eikko was in his place – an imposter. I wanted my husband to be welcome here but I couldn't help feeling that he was intruding. If I had not been really affected by the massacre, he certainly wasn't. He may have been alive when the massacre occurred but he was only an infant.

We walked in a silent could of black across the cemetery. Our family guards were in their funeral uniforms, including General Leger. He walked close behind Mom and Dad. He always took part in the memorial with our family. They never discussed it but General Leger had received a Medal of Honor and Service from the massacre because he saved Dad's life somehow. He had lost friends during that massacre. He earned his place with our family for this day of mourning.

Mom and I put our flowers down in front of the gold-embossed names of my grandparents. I took a step back. Mom lingered though, her fingers shaking as they hovered over Grandma Amberly's name. Dad took my place at her side and pulled her close to him.

I took my place next to Eikko. He leaned over and whispered, "I'm protecting your legacy."

"We're not discussing this here," I hissed back out of the corner of my mouth.

"I don't want you to end up here anytime soon, certainly not before your parents," he pressed. "They can't have any more pain in their lives. They've had enough loss."

I clenched my jaw, anger starting to boil up again. Keeping my eyes forward, I whispered back, "Do _not_ make this about my family."

"It's our family, remember? _Perhe_?"

Hearing that was almost enough to make my resolve crumble. Almost. "Maybe you should have thought of that before you went behind my back and destroyed one of the two things they dedicated most of their reign to."

"I told you that I spoke to your father about it."

"You should have spoken to me about it."

"You would have said no."

I finally turned, facing the entranceway for the mausoleum. Officer Wells, my personal guard for every time I stepped out of the palace, snapped to attention as he foresaw my imminent departure. "I would have argued to find a better way to resolve this without breaking the treaty with New Asia."

"There's no way for us to get through this war without breaking a treaty with someone, Eadlyn. I happened to choose breaking your alliance with New Asia over breaking the alliance with every European ally we have."

I finally left, Eikko following me out into the weak winter sunlight of an Angeles January morning. "That treaty was written in a time of peace. What we're seeing now is anything but." I kept walking, no longer capable of responding to him without screaming. "Are you angry at me for what I actually did or simply because I did it without telling you?"

Almost half of the guards on the family detail that morning were following me. I had twice as many guards in public than anyone else in the family because I was queen but especially now because I was carrying the heir. That meant that half of the guards in the cemetery stopped walking when I stopped. I faced Eikko, sensing that he had more to say.

"'Her first year will be the hardest'," he said, quoting someone or something. "'Don't just be there for her – be her'. That's what Henri told me the morning of your coronation. At first I thought that he was saying that to himself but now I know that he was saying it to me."

"He had no way of knowing—"

"Henri is smart, you know that. He's from Swendway. He lived there when your fourth cousin or whatever became king six years ago. Never mind that. He said to me that being prince consort it isn't the job. Being your husband isn't even the job. It's serving you in every way possible that's the job. It's being your shadow, a constant companion that goes behind you and protects you from what you can't see behind you. I'm here so that you don't have to look back. It just happens that what was behind you this time would have eventually attacked you from the front as well. An enemy doesn't stop being an enemy just because they signed a piece of paper twenty years ago, Eadlyn."

I wanted to hate him. I wanted to argue with every word he just said. I wanted to scream and throw things at him. I wanted to hold on to at least one piece of dignity as queen. I didn't have that luxury though. "I've only ever known peace. I don't know how to be a queen at war."

"I don't know how to be a prince consort at war," he answered. "But we'll figure it out together."

He took a tentative step toward me and reached for my hand. I let him take it, feeling the warmth of his hand even through the gloves we were wearing. "I feel like my life is on fast-forward right now. I'm still learning how to be a wife and a queen and now I'm going to have to learn how to be a mother. Some days I feel like I can't breathe under the weight of it all."

"Lucky for you, I'm here to help bear it. In whatever way I can. I'll be your lungs for you, to breathe for you on days that you have meetings from dawn to midnight and a colicky baby to care for."

"God, I hope our baby never has colic," I said. He pulled a hankie out of his breast pocket in his trench coat and passed it to me. I didn't even know that I was crying. "Do you think your mom believes that we actually have more to do than pose for pictures yet?"

He laughed and kissed my forehead gently. "If anyone is more stubborn than you, it's my mother. She'll probably go to her grave believing that." Officer Wells coughed pointedly. "Okay, you've been out in the open for too long. Let's get you in one of those tanks disguised as a sedan."

Eikko held his hand out to me to help me into the car but I stopped and said, "Eikko, thanks for having the balls to do something I would not have been able to do myself."

"Well, I do wear the pants in the relationship," he said, nodding down at my dress and his suit.

"Watch it," I growled, sliding into the car. Eikko was still laughing though as Officer Wells closed the door behind him.


	24. Chapter 24

"So what do I have to do for tickets to Brice's swearing in?" Ahren asked sarcastically as we talked on the phone one night in early March.

I was trying to multitask by talking to him while also scanning the minutes from a missed budget meeting the day prior. Budget meetings were normally among those that I insisted on attending but Georgean insisted that it was absolutely necessary for me to be pictured at the set up for the Prime Minister's induction ceremony. I didn't know what was so great about any pictures of me anyway. At twenty-seven weeks pregnant, I felt anything but regal or beautiful. Eikko swore that I was more beautiful than ever but I had trouble seeing the same thing as him when I looked in the mirror.

"You'd have to agree to come over here," I told Ahren, giving up on the minutes of the meeting and closing the folder with a huff. Neena scurried forward to take the folder from me but I waved for her to leave it with me.

Ahren sighed, sounding stressed. "I don't like being trapped over here, Eady. I knew that distance was part of my marrying Camille but I never anticipated being stuck in France so suddenly. This war…" His voice trailed off and I could tell that he was struggling to remain composed.

"You'll figure it out, Ahren."

"I hope so."

"Me too, because I can't handle you being stressed anymore."

"What does my stress have to do with you?"

I huffed, not wanting to have to explain our twin link to him for the hundredth time in our lives. "Ahren, remember when Mom pulled out my last tooth in the middle of the night and you woke up from a nightmare that the dentist had ripped out all of your teeth?"

"Yeah," he said slowly, not seeing where I was going with this.

"That's called twin telepathy. That's why you can't be stressed because when you're stressed, I'm stressed and I'm pregnant so I really can't handle any more stress."

"Fine. I just wish there was some way to get all of Europe in a room together so that we can settle our disagreements. We're fighting against the wrong people. New Asia and North Africa aren't the problem; it's the rebels. If we can unite, then we can defeat the rebels. Part of me is scared that the rebels planned this war so that they'd have a façade to hide behind for a while," he admitted.

"It's possible," I agreed. "Why don't you do it then?"

I could hear the frown in his voice as he asked, "Do what?"

"Get everyone together. Call for a summit."

"I can't do that."

I rolled my eyes. "You're the king of France Ahren. You can absolutely call for a summit."

"No, I mean that I can't call for a peace summit while my country is involved with the war. It

would have to be on neutral ground and since basically all of Europe and New Asia and North Africa is involved, it would have to be in—"

"Illea," I finished for him. "The summit would have to be here." Neena's eyebrows rose as she sat across from me, appearing to dread whatever I was planning.

"Eadlyn, I'm not going to ask you to plan a global peace summit. Not when you're expecting a baby so soon."

"I'm not due for another ten weeks, at least," I assured him. "That's plenty of time for us to plan a global summit. Let's just plan this right now hypothetically, okay? Protocol states that I need to wait a month for a grand event so after Brice's ceremony tomorrow, we're in the first week of April. Of course, then we'll have our birthday so that moves it to the first week of May."

Ahren clicked his tongue as he checked his calendar. "Can't do it. My anniversary party with Camille is being planned for the third weekend in May. We can't leave in the middle of that."

"Okay, so then where are we?"

"First week of June, then. Summits start on Tuesdays, right? That first Tuesday is…oh. June sixth."

I paused, considering the date. It was the soonest we could plan this event and we couldn't delay it. It had to be that week. But… "June sixth, my due date." I gulped. "We can manage that."

"What?" Ahren exclaimed. "Eadlyn, you're crazy. We cannot schedule a global peace summit to begin on your due date. That's insane. What if you have the baby before that? Or what if you don't? The last thing you'll want to do is have foreign enemies residing in your palace."

"At that point, I'll be on maternity leave. You're right about that. _But_ , I'll be able to plan most of the summit before I go on maternity leave. Eikko and Brice can manage from there. And it would only be an issue really if I do have the baby before that but Mom said that she went past her due date with all of us so it's probably unlikely for me to go early."

"Unlikely, not impossible." He sighed again. "I can't do this to you, Eady. Not in good conscience."

"Look, Ahren, what will I have to do at this summit? We're neutral in all of this, or at least trying to be. All I will be doing is hosting. That's very low-stress and low-maintenance. I think even with a newborn, I can pull this off. I'm the pregnant one, let me be the one to make this decision."

"That may be exactly why you can't have the final say. Someone needs to look out for you."

"Which you can do when you get here on June fifth."

There was a long pause and I knew Ahren was about to cave in, he just needed to grapple with it for another few moments to make him feel like he did enough to try to stop me. "Fine," he mumbled, barely audible.

"We can pull this off. Maybe I'll call in Silvia. She and Mom could do all of the planning for this like old times."

"Great. Then I can worry about you stressing yourself into early labor and Mom stressing herself into another heart attack."

I rolled my eyes again and wrote a note for myself to remind me to call Silvia later and also speak to Mom about any suggestions she had for how to conduct a successful peace summit. There had to be pictures in the archives from her first few negotiation events. Dad was always good about taking pictures for her events when she asked and I knew for a fact that he save every single roll of film and every memory card stored in the archives. "I should probably let you go. Dinner will be soon."

He chuckled softly, the same quiet rumbling in his chest that Dad had. "I've been so busy lately that customary mealtimes are nonexistent. I eat when I can."

"Well, eat now. And that's a command from your ally, Queen Eadlyn."

"Okay, I will."

"Thanks Ahren. I love you. Tell Camille I say hi."

"Sure, Eadlyn. Love you, too." The line went out but I kept the phone pressed to my ear, as if that would keep him close to me for just a bit longer.

There were some days where I really missed my twin brother. Not even Eikko could fill that hole in my life. He had the other half of my heart but Ahren actually was my other half. A brother wasn't something that a husband could replace. I had expected this first year to be hard since he got married. When he first told me that he was in love with Camille, I started preparing myself for the fact that he would eventually move away and he would miss things like Christmas and birthdays and the arrivals of babies. There was still a very obvious empty seat in the dining room though. And I couldn't easily forget that this would be the first of my birthday spent without the one with whom I share it.

I was chewing on my lip over this as I trekked down to the Women's Room where Mom, Lennie, Miss Marlee, and Miss Lucy were working on the project I'd given Mom back in September. "How're things going in here?" I asked the women. They were all hunching over a table, binders open in front of them. From the door, I could see that one of the binders was full of fabric swatches.

"Oh, Eadlyn, we need another opinion!" Miss Marlee squealed.

Mom waved me in and pointed at the binder of fabrics. "Which one do you think is best for tablecloths for a tea party?" she asked me, pointing to the creamy selections on the page.

"This one," I said, pointing to the one in the corner that had the most dainty floral embroidery on it. "A tea party, huh? For who?"

"Just some of the girls from the local orphanage," Mom answered. "Now that I'm retired, I have more time to properly focus on philanthropy."

"I'm not sure that's what retirement is for, Mom."

"Well it's what retirement looks like when your eldest forces you to retire at the old age of thirty-eight," she said primly.

Lennie turned to me and took my hand in mine. Mom and Dad had always been extra affectionate to us kids but I was still getting used to how touchy-feely Eikko's family was. Blasted Europeans. "Eadlyn, while you're here, I want to ask you how you feel about a baby shower."

"For who?"

"For you, of course!"

My mouth fell open. I had never considered that option before. I looked to Mom, who was smiling at me encouragingly. Running my hand over my growing belly where the baby was exhibiting her talent in somersaults, I shrugged. "Sure. I never really thought of that but I'm sure that there are things we'll need."

"Absolutely!" Mom agreed. "Don't think that just because you're queen and you're pregnant, there will automatically be a stockpile of diapers in the palace when your baby arrives."

"How do you know this?" Lennie asked, eyebrows raised.

"Let's just say that within three days of them being born, there was a nightmarish night where we realized that we were completely out of diapers. Luckily, one of the maids was on night duty and had just had a baby six months prior so she was able to lend us an extra she happened to have in her bag. It was humiliating, nonetheless."

"I remember, you cried about it with me the next morning," Marlee said thoughtfully.

"Hey, my hormones were all over the place," Mom defended.

I put my hand on her shoulder and squeezed it. "I'll make sure to start ordering diapers now. Will I have to plan this baby shower?" I asked Lennie.

"Absolutely not! I will plan everything with your mother. We will simply give you a date and time and you'll need to show up."

"Sounds good to me." Mom tapped my hip with her finger and then pointed at a small note she had just written while Miss Lucy and Miss Marlee were absorbed into the discussion of fabrics once again. It only said PANAMA on it but I understood what she was saying. "Thank you," I told her sincerely. She waved me off and crumpled the note up before anyone else could see it.

* * *

The next day, we started getting ready for the ceremony officially instating Brice as Prime Minister as soon as we were finished breakfast. Though her responsibilities started in January after the New Year, it was established in the plans for the new parliamentary system that elections would occur on the first of every five years with the Prime Minister being sworn in ceremonially in the first week of March. It wouldn't be on the same scale as my coronation or wedding but it was still a major ceremony held in one of the smaller cathedrals in the Central Angeles.

We were gathered in the foyer, awaiting Raelynn's go-ahead for us to get in our respective cars when General Leger groaned loudly. "Wells, we may need to reroute and keep the queen here," he said to my guard.

Dad frowned, sporting an even darker tan after the brief trip he had taken with Mom to Honduragua for her birthday. "What's happening?" he asked in a grave voice.

"My men reported there are crowds surrounding the cathedral. Angry crowds. They're protesting the constitutional monarchy," General Leger informed us.

"We can't just cancel this whole thing," I argued. "We must go on."

Everyone looked at each other nervously. Brice's eyes were wide as saucers as she stood in her burgundy silk gown, train gathered over her arm. The gown was stunning on its own but it would be especially sophisticated underneath the midnight blue and gold cloak she would wear over it during her vows.

It was Eikko who finally spoke, placing his hands on my shoulders lightly. "Eadlyn, love, it will be dangerous to go."

"But this is important."

"We can say that you're under the weather because of the baby. No one would argue with that."

I snorted. "Okay, that's it. No one here is allowed to baby me anymore because I'm pregnant. Not until I'm actually ready to pop, got it? I can be queen while I grow a baby. It's nothing that hasn't been done before. Heck, Mom was pregnant with twins and did it. A little protest won't hurt me."

"I had small pockets of rebels to contend with, not a significant portion of the population. We're just looking out for you," Mom interjected.

"And I appreciate that," I said, holding my hands up. "But it would look worse for me to not be there, at the ceremony embodying the very thing I am trying to institute. The people will mellow out once they have time to understand these changes that are happening." No one moved, not even Brice as Raelynn tried to get her into her car. "I'm going."

I held my chin up high as I walked out of the front doors and climbed into my car. Eikko, Kaden, and Osten rode with us. Mom and Dad were riding with Brice in their own separate car. The crowds lined the streets the entire way to the cathedral. It seemed like all of Angeles had come out for this. As we slowed down just enough for me to start reading the signs, I realized that almost all of them were protesting the monarchy; signs screaming that this wasn't a solution to anything or reminding me that people were still starving in Panama. Worse yet, there were signs urging us to defend our allies across the seas. So many citizens of Illéa had family in Europe that were probably in danger, just like Eikko's had been. No wonder they hated me. I rescued his family and no one else's.

The roar of the crowd was unbearable as we arrived in front of the cathedral, some of them chanting things as terrible as "Off with their heads". I tried to remain poised and composed as Wells rushed me from the car to the narthex of the cathedral but we were moving so quickly that the cameras probably didn't even have time to take a good picture of me anyway.

Once safely inside, Wells checked me over, eyes sweeping me from top to bottom several times. "Someone could shoot you in that crowd and we would never even hear the shot," he said, half to himself. "It's terrifying," he admitted.

"I'm just fine, Officer Wells. Don't worry."

"With all due respect, ma'am, it's my job to worry about you."

Eikko and I walked with my brothers to the seats just below the raised platform where Brice would go through the vows. Even the thick stone walls of the cathedral couldn't drown out the din of the crowd outside. I watched advisers shift nervously in their seats as some chants came through the walls clearly. Wives and husbands looked around the cathedral as if they were trying to plot their escape if we were attacked. I had read about mutinies and rebellious citizens. My father had fought against some of the toughest rebels to live in history but I didn't know it was like this. I had never really lived through it, knowing that I was the one who had to clean up this mess.

Sitting through the ceremony, Dad had one eye on Brice and one hand crossed over Mom's lap, almost like a seat belt. It was a clear display of protection. Eikko sat angled slightly away from me but as close to me as possible, shielding me as much as he could without actually sitting in front of me. Kaden looked like he was about to jump out of his seat at the slightest sound. I had never seen the guards stand up taller than the ones surrounding the perimeter of the sanctuary where we were sitting.

As we rode back to the palace, my mind wandered to what Wells had told me. It was his job to protect me. He was paid by me, from the treasury I commanded, to get me through each day without so much as a scratch. He had a family though. If he were to die simply from trying to keep me alive, how would his family feel? What of my citizens who were loyal to the crown? Were they being persecuted by those against it? I couldn't just keep doing things the way I had been. I had to go back to Marid's idea. My people were upset. Rather than trying to crush their protests, I had to listen to them in a controlled environment.

I found Raelynn in her office in the bowels of the palace that next Monday. "We need to have another town hall. Two representatives from each province, each mayor choosing who their reps will be. It needs to be Friday, understand? We will pay for every plane ticket and hotel room. They can stay in the mayor's houses in the city if they must. Just get them here."

"Your Majesty-"

"Don't tell me that it can't be done, Raelynn. Just do it."

General Leger found me that afternoon, a deep line set between his eyebrows as he entered my office with Raelynn, Neena, and Brice on his heels. "You don't really think that I'll let you sit in the front of a room with seventy angry citizens, do you?"

"You will let me do it," I said in a serious voice. I had been waiting for him to come and find me. He had a list of one hundred reasons why I couldn't do this and I was prepared to counter every single one of them with the same explanation. "Things will only get worse if I don't do this. I need to take the time to listen to my people. It will be here in the palace where you can control the environment."

"Just like last time? I would hardly call that controlled," General Leger said, anger simmering beneath his calm voice.

"The mayors aren't going to pick terrorists as their representatives," I argued.

Brice huffed. "I wouldn't put it past the mayor of Panama to do that." General Leger started pacing on the far side of the room, one hand pinching the bridge of his nose as he was deep in thought.

"What else can I do? The people are five minutes away from setting up a guillotine in the middle of Angeles and pulling advisers from their homes to put their heads under the blade. This can at least buy us a little time." Everyone still looked doubtful that it was a good idea. "Look, we won't promote it or anything. No one will know it's happening except for the people involved. That way we won't give the public a chance to plant someone in the group."

"So you're suppressing public opinion under the guise of trying to help things? That's what dictators do," Brice said. "That's something Gregory Illéa would have done, my fa...King Clarkson would have done that."

"Sometimes a queen needs to be forceful in order to get things done. Rule with a firm hand, your borders will remain secure on both sides. That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it."

General Leger stopped pacing and faced me. "I'll give you the townhall on the condition that you are not the one who presides over it."

I raised my eyebrows. "Then who will?"

"Eikko. The people don't love him, but they like him more than you. They see him as one of their own since he wasn't raised here in the palace. They see him as the more sympathetic one of the two of you."

"Well, he is."

"Exactly. They'll really talk to him. We put you in the front of the room and they'll only see a pretty statue with whom they have no personal connection. Put him in front of them and they see an immigrant's son, a working-class citizen, and a soon-to-be father," General Leger reasoned. As much as I hated to admit it, he had a point.

Raelynn was nodding. "He's right. The One's approval ratings have always been higher than the king's. Your mother and grandmother were loved by the people while they were reigning, for the same reason General Leger just gave you. Eikko is the only one who can do this."

"Than he's doing it," I conceded.

"And we're keeping you under lock and key while this is happening, no arguments," General Leger said, pointing to me. "We're still expecting an attack from New Asia and I can't have regular citizens wandering around the palace with you sitting quietly in your study."

"I can't hide in my own home."

"You will or you won't have a townhall."

I narrowed my eyes at him, feeling less like General Leger's queen and more like his child. "Fine."

Neena sighed, her eyes heavy with concern as she looked between me and General Leger. "Well, that's it then. We have a lot to plan in the next few days so let's get to work."

* * *

On Thursday night, the night before the townhall, I awoke to find the other side of the bed empty. I quickly went to use the bathroom and then crept down the hall in search of my husband. Both of our studies were empty, as was the family room. Finally, when I was about to give up and go back to bed, an older guard waved to get my attention. "Prince Eikko is down in the kitchens, ma'am," he informed me.

"For how long?" I asked, rubbing my belly. I could feel the baby start to kick again, meaning she was probably waking up. I definitely couldn't go back to sleep now.

"Only about twenty minutes. He didn't tell us to pass his location on to you but I assumed you would like to know."

I smiled at the guard. "Rather than walk around the palace aimlessly all night? I think you're correct in that regard, Sir. Have a pleasant evening."

In the kitchens, Eikko was sitting at the wooden prep counter with a bowl of fruit salad from breakfast that morning in front of him. He lifted his head to the door when heard me shuffle inside. I claimed the stool next to him. "I didn't mean to abandon you. I just had to clear my head a bit," he whispered.

"It's fine. Not like I'm sleeping much right now anyway."

"You know, we could get a softer mattress if you need it. Or new pillows. And we should probably ask Eloise to remove our winter comforter because we don't need it this time of year and-"

"Eikko?" I put my hand over his as he spun his fork in his fingers anxiously. "The bed is fine. It's only temporary. Once the baby is born, neither of us will be sleeping." My joke was poorly-timed because it only managed to make the corners of his eyes tighten even more. "Tell me what you're thinking about."

"The baby," he whispered.

I nodded, removing the fork so that I could thread my fingers through his and squeeze his hand. "What about the baby?" I gently asked.

"I don't...Eadlyn, don't get angry with me but I don't want our baby to become queen. I think about the future and I try to imagine our daughter doing what we are and I don't want that life for her. Sometimes I wish - I wish that our lives could be _normal_. That I go to work everyday on a farm somewhere and you stay home with the kids and open up your own fashion line from our kitchen and we talk about boring adult things like bills or school districts." He turned in his seat to face me better. "Don't think me ungrateful for this life, Eadlyn. I just didn't ever imagine becoming a prince consort, not until the moment you asked me to marry you. I feel like I've barely had time to adjust and now in two months, we're going to have a baby to raise in a world that still feels foreign to me."

"How can I help you then?" I asked, sitting up taller. One thing I had learned with Eikko's anxiety was that I couldn't step in and do what I thought would work for him. I had to let him decide what was best for himself.

"Give me something to do. Something more than decorating and being an ambassador to the people on behalf of the royal family. I'll gladly go to war for you Eadlyn but I want to do it as more than a guy in a nice suit and a crown."

I chewed on the inside of my cheek, unconsciously moving his hand to my belly so that he could feel the baby kick. As he gazed down at me in awe, I made a decision. "You really want to go to war for me?"

"Really."

"The North African rebels are attacking Europe and have been for a few years now. Why?"

Eikko frowned and shook his head. "I don't know."

"I don't either." Eikko looked even more puzzled than before. "Don't you see? It's just like what is happening with the people right now. We aren't listening to what they really want so their only choice is to lash out. From the beginning, the North African rebels have been attacking Europe - or so everyone believes. Has anyone actually sat down with them to ask them why they're doing this?"

"You're saying that they've resorted to violence because it's the only way to get their message out there?"

"Or the only way to get enough attention to put a message out there. I don't know if they've done it yet but we can only beat them or make peace with them by knowing what's on the line for them. The only way to do that is to draw them in."

His eyes grew larger as he caught on to what I was saying. "Draw them in. _Let_ them in." He looked down at his fruit salad, thinking deeply for a few moments. Then he peered at me curiously. "Tomorrow isn't going to go well at all, is it?"

"I need you to trust me. Trust that I would never put your life in danger."

He blew out a long breath. "Who's attacking me?"

"Kaden's guard, Ivan. He'll be in there, he'll have a gun. General Leger doesn't know what's happening. Ivan is just going to draw his weapon, fire it and get dragged from the room. The guards won't even know it's him until he's out of the room and removes his disguise."

"Who else knows this plan?"

"Ivan. You."

"If this goes wrong…"

"It won't." I touched my hand to his cheek. "You do this for me, you get to command the military. Because I'm not good at it at all and I have enough to worry about with making sure we don't have any food shortages from our trading with European allies."

He extended his right hand to me. "You've got a deal."


	25. Chapter 25

The morning of the town hall meeting dawned gray with the promise of rain. Since I was supposed to be hiding all day, Eloise dressed me in comfortable pants and a light blouse. I attended to some last-minute business concerning the seating of the guests at the town hall and poked my head in on General Leger's security meeting.

They were doing a weapons check at the gate of the palace and again at the front door but Georgean insisted that it would look bad for us to check people more than twice so this was the most they could plan. Security would be tripled on the third floor where the entire royal family would be sequestered for the day, except for Eikko. He would have the most experienced and skilled guards General Leger had that wouldn't be guarding the third floor. Multiple exit plans had been planned for the morning in case of an emergency, General Leger claiming that they were last resorts. He was really trying to be optimistic about this idea.

I kept Ivan back after the meeting. "You understand the plan?" I asked him.

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"You just need to fire one blank. It doesn't matter where you shoot it. If the people can be convinced that terrorists are a real threat, we can swing them back on our side. They just need to see that they can penetrate the palace and want us dead," I said, mostly to remind myself of my logic in this madness.

Ivan bowed his head. "I understand, Your Majesty. You have nothing to fear here in the palace. If the terrorists had men inside, you would know."

"How long have you been a guard, Ivan?"

"Around fifteen years, Your Majesty. I was immediately placed here at the palace and was shortly assigned to your younger brother."

I nodded. "You know my family, and I trust you. We need more men with your loyalty under our roof."

"Agreed, Your Majesty."

"Best get going. I don't want anyone to be suspicious of your involvement in this." He bowed again and exited the room, cutlass clanking against the doorframe as he went.

I met Eikko in our bedroom where he was donning a fresh suit for the town hall. I straightened his tie and lapels, needing to give my hands something to do. Eikko could sense my nervous energy and grasped my wrists, forcing me to stop. "You would never put me in harm's way, Eadlyn."

"It doesn't feel that way today," I whispered. "I trust Ivan. I just have a weird feeling…"

"Yes, it's called fear. I understand it's something relatively unfamiliar to you." I rolled my eyes at his smile. "Listen to me Eadlyn. General Leger has made this place into a fortress. Even if something does go wrong, I will be safe."

"He'll hate me if anything goes wrong with Ivan's plan. He should know about it."

"No. He can't know about it if you want the plan to go smoothly." He cupped one of my cheeks in his hand. "I love you, Eadlyn."

"I love you too."

Eikko leaned down to kiss me fervently, almost desperately. I clung to him, unable to bear the thought of him going into a shark tank in a little under an hour. He wrapped his arms tight around me, obviously thinking the same thing. "We just have to get through today. Then we can go on and live happily ever after," he whispered into my hair.

"Happily ever after with a war. I'm afraid that this will just be the start of a long battle." I started, realizing that I had never told him about my phone call with Ahren. "Don't kill me, Eikko, but I may or may not have scheduled a peace summit for the week of June sixth."

"June sixth?" he repeated, drawing back from me abruptly. "Eadlyn-"

"I know, I know. Believe me, Ahren isn't happy with it either. But of all of our allies, we are the most neutral at the moment and we are the only ones that could actually get everyone here. Unfortunately, that's the soonest we could plan it."

"Eadlyn, if you haven't already had the baby, you'll be on maternity leave that week. How are you supposed to host twenty different nations and garner world peace?"

"I can do that while on maternity leave and I can do that with a newborn. Mom told me that newborns are easy to take care of. It's the toddlers that cause trouble."

Eikko took a deep, annoyed breath. "Maybe for her, who had four of them. I don't think it'll be so easy the first time around." I raised my eyebrows at him and he shook his head. "I can't believe I'm letting you do this."

"You're not letting me do this. You know my limits, Eikko. If I need to be told to go to bed or whatever, you are the emergency shutdown button, okay? We," I placed his hand on my belly, "are your responsibility that week. And you may have to be the one to negotiate world peace too, but we'll worry about that when it comes."

"I can't believe we only have a few months left. It feels like just yesterday that we were meeting."

There was a knock on the door and Eikko's butler poked his head inside. "It's time, Your Majesties. General Leger would like for Queen Eadlyn to go into her secure location now, before any guests arrive."

"Of course, thank you Adam." I met Eikko's eyes again. "We'll be fine. General Leger won't let so much as a fly into the family room, okay?"

"Just let me tell you one more time that I love you." He kissed me again, this time chastely. Then he bent down to press his lips to my belly. "And I love you, sweet girl."

"We'll be doomed if this baby is a boy," I told him.

He smiled, his excitement not quite reaching his eyes. "There's no way we're having a boy. Only girls, and they're only allowed to look like you."

"Okay, okay. Go, appease the citizenry. We'll see you for dinner." He squeezed my hand one last time before I walked over to the family room where my family and his family were already gathered.

Mom and Lennie were laughing over what looked like a photo album and I groaned, instantly deciding to let them look at my baby pictures in peace. Al and Kaarlo were engrossed in some sporting event happening on television and Kaden and Osten were playing an intense game of chess. Dad was on his own, staring down into the gardens with a glass of something in his hand. With little energy to talk to anyone else at the moment, I approached him and looked down toward the gardens where guards were in the middle of rotating their shifts. It was a choreographed, well-practiced routine. Even in these moments in between their shifts on duty, they were vigilant.

"It's quite something, isn't it?" Dad asked.

"What is?"

"Being surrounded by these people that are willing to die for you. For most of those men, the only thing I know about them are their names yet it's their job to die, if it means that I live." He took a swig of his drink. It was definitely something stronger than wine.

I frowned. "I've never really thought about it, honestly."

"You've never had to. It's all you've known." He paused again, gritting his teeth slightly. "I saw you talking to Ivan this morning. Everything okay there?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

Dad leaned against the window frame, still looking outside. It was just starting to rain. "When we found out that we were pregnant with you and Ahren, we started choosing guards who would be your personal body guards. Did you know that our personal guards have to go through an extra two months of intensive training? Because we didn't. You two weren't even born yet and we were choosing the people that would spend their lives guarding yours."

"Why hasn't General Leger talked to me about it yet?"

"We're at war, Eads. Even if it's not official, increasing troop presence overseas means decreasing the men we have here, domestically. We're spread thin. Even if Aspen won't admit to it, I can tell. It's just like when I was a teenager."

Though he was standing right next to me, talking to me, I could tell that Dad wasn't totally there. His mind was somewhere else. "You haven't been sleeping well, have you?"

"You'd understand, now, why memories from my adolescence may keep me up at night, right?" I nodded. "I try to hide it from your mom so that she won't worry but it's no use. You live with someone for twenty years and very little can be kept secret from them."

"I understand that. Eikko hates it when I find him in the kitchens in the middle of the night."

"He's a fine man, Eadlyn. I couldn't be happier for your choice."

I sighed. "I wish the people felt the same."

He put his hand on my shoulder. "They'll adjust. This year, your first year as queen, is not supposed to be easy. You've handled everything with little trouble. Sure, you've had hiccups here and there but I couldn't be more proud to be your subject right now."

"No offense, but you're a rather privileged subject, Dad. You know everything, you know I'm doing the best I can. The people don't know that."

"Then why let them bother you?" I shrugged. "Look, you're never going to have one hundred-percent approval. You'll be really lucky just to have seventy-five. You can't please everyone, but you can keep them safe, fed, and housed. Focus on the basic human rights. The education programs and infrastructure and sport camps will come later."

"Thanks, Dad."

"You should relax today. You don't have any duties to fulfill this afternoon, you're with family, aside from being in a room that's on lockdown, it's just a normal day. Why don't you take a break from queen and just be daughter and sister for the time being?"

The baby kicked, seeming to like the idea of relaxing. I smiled slightly and faced Dad fully. "I think I'm supposed to be Mom right now." Dad frowned, not quite understanding, so I grabbed his hand and placed it on my belly.

It took a few moments but the baby kicked again, making Dad suck in a breath. "Eadlyn…" His eyes were wide with excitement and wonder, looking slightly as if he had no idea what he had just felt.

The baby continued kicking his hand as I said, "Haven't you done this before?"

"Three times, actually. But it never ceases to be amazing."

"Yeah, it's really amazing in the early hours of the morning."

Dad winced slightly and moved his hand automatically as the baby shifted, kicking elsewhere. "I remember that from your mom. Kaden was by far the worst. Go figure, your mom's hardest pregnancy and he turned out to be an angel. I can't believe that's my grandchild. I'm too young to be a grandfather, right?"

"Would it make you feel better if we called you uncle?"

He laughed. "No, actually. As much as I hate being a grandfather before I'm fifty, I can't wait to be Grandpa to your children. It's...I never really knew my grandparents. Magda is the only grandparent you had. Your mom and I are overjoyed to see your children with four grandparents, just the way it should be."

My eyes welled up at the thought. Even six months ago, with Mom's many health scares, that would have been a thought to ignore. It would have been a hope, a prayer. Now, seeing her beaming in all of her good health and happiness and relaxation, it was an assurance.

"I think the baby got tired," Dad said, pulling his hand away. "C'mon, let's get you off your feet and maybe even give you a chance to nap while the little one is still, okay?" He led me to one of the couches and gestured for me to sit down.

"Will you stay with me, Daddy?" I asked, not quite ready to be without him. I felt six-years-old again. Something about having him here, holding my hand, made my nervous stomach feel one hundred times better.

"Sure." He sat down beside me and put his arm around my shoulders. I nestled into the side of his body. It wasn't the same as being held by Eikko or even Ahren but he was still just as comforting. It wasn't long before I was nodding off.

I wasn't entirely sure if I was dreaming or not when the alarm went off, making me nearly jump off of the sofa. My brain wasn't processing anything. There was just Dad, his hand tight around mine, pulling me toward a door. Al suddenly appeared my side, his hand on the small of my back. We entered the secret passageways. Dad and Al never lost contact with me as we dashed through the dark tunnels. I whined slightly when we passed the spot that Eikko and I always escaped to.

It wasn't until we were in the large safe room and I had the chance to take in the faces looking at me that I realized why I was panicking. Eikko wasn't here. "Eikko…" I panted, winded after our mad dash to safety.

Dad rubbed my back. "Just catch your breath, sweetheart. In and out."

"Eikko...he isn't...he's not here…"

Mom was suddenly before me, her hands gripping my shoulders. Her eyes locked on mine and she mimicked controlled breaths. "You can do this, Eadlyn. You need to breathe deeply for your baby. C'mon, listen to Dad and I."

I didn't want to listen to them. I ducked under her hands and started pacing. "Eikko isn't here. Where is he? Will they bring him here? What's going on?" The questions just came tumbling out. My hands were twisting around each other and it just felt like my lungs weren't holding any air.

"Eadlyn!" Kaden shouted abruptly, making everyone in the room stop. We all looked at him but he was only looking at me, his early teenager face lifting defiantly. "We don't know where Eikko is. Worry will not help that. Slow down, take some big breaths, concentrate on that for now."

The silence was too much. It made me feel like the whole room was going to cave in. My composure completely crumbled then and I unlocked my knees, sinking down against the heavy vault door. Mom knelt down next to me, clutching my hand and wiping away my tears. As I cried, I worked on breathing and finally paid attention to Dad, still mimicking the way I should be breathing. Eventually my body started to relax a bit and exhaustion fell into my bones. I was wide awake, my mind still working a million miles a minute, but my body seemed to be telling me to rest.

I fell into a sort of worry-induced coma, not really responding to anything around me or focusing on anything. Dad lifted me up gently and carried me to one of the chairs. Mom draped a blanket around my shoulders and started rubbing my feet. They were trying. They were really trying to keep me sane. The longer I stared at the door, though, the more my mind spiraled.

I thought back to when I was thirteen and had a crush on the prince of Saudi. We danced at a party and when he left, he promised to call me. Dad even let me give him our private family phone number. I sat by the phone in the family room for hours, just staring at it. I missed lunch and my afternoon lessons. Mom finally came and sat down next to me. She had said, "A watched phone never rings." It didn't make sense to me. It felt as if (despite the fact that by then it was late at night in Saudi) I looked at the phone long enough, I could will it to ring. Anyone could have called that phone, really, but in my mind the only person who could call that phone was the prince.

So I kept watch over the vault door, waiting for it to open. It would either be Eikko, being brought to safety, or General Leger with news. Officer Wells was in the room but he wouldn't clog up the radio by asking about Eikko when the guards needed their radios to communicate through whatever madness was happening above us. This was something we would have to wait out.

My mind brought me back to reality when I heard Mom say the word "Astra".

"What about Astra?" I asked suddenly. There were two years between myself and my oldest cousin but growing up, she had been one of my closest confidantes. After her mom passed away and she moved back to Carolina with her dad's family, we drifted apart. At the time, we were in such different stages in life. Astra was a full-blown teenager starting to get real-world responsibilities and I was still an awkward pre-teen, my only responsibilities being to make my parents look good. Distance and grief had added a strain to our relationship, and Aunt May would occasionally mention some dissention to the crown from the Orders family.

Mom started, not expecting me to tune in so abruptly. "I was just mentioning to your father that it may be time to bring James and the kids here. They may have distanced themselves, but I worry about them. Especially being on the other side of the country...it makes it hard for us to protect them."

"Could they really be in danger because of us?"

"We love them, Eadlyn. They're family. That makes them a weakness," Dad said, patting my knee. "It may be a few days before I can bring it up to Aspen, though. We don't know what's happening upstairs and how much that will change things for the next week or so."

Mom nodded solemnly. She didn't talk about Astra and Leo often, despite being their godmother. She and May shared the responsibility for Astra but lately, it had seemed May was the only one really visiting them. I tried to put myself in Mom's shoes, losing a sister so suddenly and then having to care for her children that looked so much like her. The thought of losing one of my brothers was painful in a way different from the thought of losing Mom or Eikko. Especially Ahren...he was my other half. Some days it felt like being an ocean apart was too much.

"Leo still has school," Mom argued. "It's his last year, he'll want to stay with his friends."

"His safety is more important. We've seen what the rebels can do to people far less important than a queen's nephew."

"They already feel like we get in the way of their normal lives enough as it is. Should we really add another disruption?"

Dad shrugged. "They were born into the family. They'll have to understand that no matter how much distance they put between us, they can't really get away."

"What about…" Mom's voice trailed off but Dad seemed to know where she was going.

"We should. He'll be insulted if we do nothing."

"I'm sorry," Lennie began, approaching my parents and I, "but you're not talking about bringing more of your relatives here for _safety_ , are you?"

Mom and Dad exchanged a befuddled look. "Indeed, we are," Dad confirmed.

Lennie's eyebrows rose. "You cannot be serious about this. You brought my family and I from our homes to this palace, all in the name of safety, and now look where we are. We are hiding in a vault under a palace that our ancestors built, cowering, while who knows what is happening to my son-"

"Lennie, I understand that this is frustrating," Dad started but Mom overpowered him.

"We are not _cowering_ , I can assure you of that," Mom snapped.

"Well we're certainly not fighting," Lennie said. "Tell me, Queen America, what exactly are we doing down here if we're not cowering or fighting? Don't tell me you've lost your nerve."

"How dare you speak to my wife like that," Dad growled, stepping in front of Mom protectively. "Don't forget that while we have taken you in, she is your queen and demands absolute respect. You are our guest here."

"This is a hell of a way to treat your guests."

Al stood and put a hand on Lennie's shoulder. "Len, that is enough."

"No, these people deserve to know what kind of circus show they're putting on here. You wonder why the people hate you so much. Look around! Your palace is crumbling around you, Your Majesties, and your guards are stationed all over the world because your enemies outnumber your allies," Lennie said aggressively.

"We are not in a time of peace," Dad pointed out.

"We were when we gave our son to you. And now look. He could be dead upstairs for all we know and we are just down here, twiddling our thumbs, waiting for news that probably won't come for hours."

Kaden stepped in between my in-laws and my father then, putting his hands out. "Stop, all of you. Emotions are high right now, I get it, but arguing isn't going to solve anything."

"As soon as this is over, I'm taking my family back to Swendway," Lennie snarled.

"Go ahead," Dad taunted, nostrils flared.

Kaden sighed, his head bowing. Josie gently pulled Dad away, separating him and Lennie further. Mom's teeth were still gritted, her face flushed with anger. I was frozen in my chair, my mind replaying what Lennie had just said. _He could be dead_ , I thought. The father of my child could be dead and we didn't know. We would know, right? They would tell us right away if he had died. God, he was mine to protect, he was supposed to be safe with me in my palace, and I fed him to the wolves…

"Ead?" Kaden said, looking at my inquisitively. "What do you mean, fed him to the wolves?"

"You heard that?" I asked as I started to notice all of the people staring at me, waiting for answers. "It wasn't supposed to go like this, the town hall."

"How was it supposed to go?" Mom asked quietly.

"Eikko told me he could do this. I gave him the option, he was going along with the plan. We were so confidant that it would work…"

"Does it have to do with Ivan?" Dad pressed.

"Ivan?" Kaden chimed in. "My old bodyguard, Ivan?"

Our attention shifted to him. "Your _old_ bodyguard?"

"He hasn't been around for a couple weeks. I figured that he had quit or retired or something. What does any of this have to do with him?"

Mom pressed a hand to her mouth and took a few steps away from the group, already panicking. Dad looked straight at me. "Eadlyn, exactly how is Ivan involved in this?"

I never got the chance to respond.

With a loud squeak, the door swung open and I jumped to my feet, nearly knocking my mother over in the process. A breathless General Leger stepped through and to my supreme disappointment, Eikko didn't follow after him. He was alone.

"Aspen, what happened?" Mom asked, taking him by the shoulder and seeming to inspect him for injury.

He didn't answer. His eyes swept the room until they fell on me. "Eadlyn…" he sighed, his expression grim. "I'm so sorry."

Ivan was a rebel plant in the guards. General Leger proclaimed that he was probably the most successful plant that New Asia had ever had. He had risen through the ranks, unsuspected, and was placed in front of the royal family. And while it would have been easy for him to simply kill us all in one broad stroke, he apparently had orders to wait until we put him in the position to do harm.

I had given him that opportunity. My husband was lying in a hospital bed with a bullet wound in his stomach because of it.

General Leger gave us the full debrief as we waited for Eikko to wake up from his surgery that saved his liver and corrected any other internal damage done. He explained how Ivan waited for eleven minutes to pass in the town hall before raising his gun and firing at Eikko. He made it past all security checkpoints because he knew where they were. Because he was a guard. The other guards took him into custody. The emergency alarm blared. All other guards helped calm the guests and get them to safety. The town hall, for all intents and purposes, was a disaster.

It was a few hours after we emerged from the safe room that Eikko blinked his eyes open, grasping at the mask on his face in fear. I knew that he couldn't stand sleeping in a way that had him restrained. There were some nights where he didn't even like me to touch him while we were sleeping because it plagued on his anxiety. When he woke up with wires tangled around him and a mask strapped around his jaw, I immediately pulled at his hands and started speaking to him.

Dr. Cleary assured us that Eikko's injuries were non life-threatening. He would be slow moving for a few weeks and wouldn't be able to do anything too rigorous for up to two months but he would be just fine by the same time next year. Mom stayed with me in the afternoon as I sat by Eikko's side. Dad attended to any security measures that didn't require the acting queen. The only thing I had to sign off on was the use of torture on Ivan in order to extract information about New Asia and any other rebels hiding in our midst. Only General Leger's closest friends were allowed around us now. For their safety, Kaden and Osten had been quarantined to the first floor library so that we could all be on the same level of the palace.

Mom was quiet as we listened to the soft, steady beeping of Eikko's heart machine. She picked at her fingernails thoughtfully, uncharacteristically quiet. "We hired him," she mumbled, sounding mostly like she was talking to herself.

"Sorry?" I asked, drained in every way possible.

"We hired Ivan to protect us. It seemed so thoughtless. He was one of the stand-out guards, he made Aspen's shortlist for recommendations for Kaden. There was no way for us to have seen this coming."

"I did. I had a terrible feeling about today."

Mom shook her head. "You didn't know that it would be this."

"What are the odds that I chose him?"

"From the outside perspective? Terrible. It makes no sense for you to have chosen him to be your own plant in the town hall." We both winced at her casual use of the word 'plant'. "But as someone who understands you and how our personal guards work, it makes sense. You couldn't send one of your own guards because they can't leave you. Kaden's and Osten's have more flexibility and Kaden's guards have been serving him personally for fifteen years, making them less recognized by other, low-level guards. It's no coincidence that he started excelling as a guard while I was pregnant with Kaden."

I shook my head for what felt like the hundredth time. "Has anyone talked to Ahren yet? If he hears about this in the news…"

"Your dad is calling him. We had the same thought. All that matters is that you and the baby are safe."

"Eikko…"

"Will recover." Mom sighed and ran a hand down her face. "It's hard to watch them hurt, isn't it?" I nodded numbly. "Did your father ever tell you how I found about the scars on his back?"

I blinked, slightly nervous about treading this territory with her. I wasn't sure I could handle it emotionally at the moment. "He told me that the last time it happened...he did it for you."

She nodded, a sad smile tugging on her lips. "I was walking right down that hallway outside later that night, after the Report. I was waiting for him to come tell me that I was going home. To get some clarity, I decided to walk down to the gardens. You know how much I love walking through the gardens." I nodded, knowing that they were frequently a place of refuge for both her and Dad. "And I bumped into him, walking right out of that door. He could barely stand up straight and he had this little box of medical supplies because he was planning on tending to himself."

"He said that he tried to hide it," I said, recalling vaguely the story that Dad told me. Truth be told, most of it had been overshadowed by the revelation that Lady Brice was actually Aunt Brice.

"Lucky for him that I bumped into him. The rebel alarm went off and he was in no condition to run, so of course Fate decided to stick us in a small safe room together. One thing led to another, and next thing I knew, I had patched up his back for him and was realizing just how deeply he loved me. And how much of a fool I'd been to think that he wasn't so sincere in his feelings. He could have told me he loved me twenty times. Seeing his back torn up from him trying to protect me...that's what sealed it for me."

"But isn't it terrifying, knowing that if anything had happened to him and you lost him, it would be your fault?"

She winced. "Yes, when you put it like that. Relationships are more than that, though. He's my best friend. We actually started out as friends, for however brief a time. Surely you know by now that the fear of losing your other half is outweighed by the value of your relationship. Just take it as a gift, that these boys would do anything for us."

"I'd prefer it if blood didn't need to be spilled."

"Of course you would. We can't live in...Oh, Lahja, join us."

I turned in my seat to see my sister-in-law lingering in the doorway, hesitating. "Are you sure? I wouldn't want to intrude."

"Please, we're just in here having girl talk," Mom said. "Husband stuff, you know?"

Lahja smiled tentatively as she sat in one of the numerous chairs in the room. "How is Eikko?" she asked, nodding to her brother.

"He's out of the woods, so to speak," I told her, my hand tightening around his reflexively. "Dr. Cleary said he'll fully recover in time."

"Good. America, I want to apologize on behalf of my mother. What she said to you and your husband was wrong-"

Mom waved her hand. "Your mother isn't sorry, Lahja. Don't feel it necessary to apologize for her actions. Believe me, what she said isn't all new to me. I've heard it all before. And I've heard it from my brother, actually, so I could handle it. Maxon made it into a much bigger deal than it needed to be, defending my honor and all of that. See what I mean?" she asked, looking at me. "Men."

I chuckled at Mom being ornery again. Leave it to her to make me smile after the day I'd had. Eikko shifted his head slightly. "He must know we're talking about his kind," Lahja said, starting to giggle herself.

"Us men do the same thing," he said in a very raspy voice, barely able to breathe the words out. I had to swallow my tears of relief just at hearing him speak.

"How are you feeling? Can I get you anything?" I asked, swiping a hand down his cheek.

He shook his head just a little bit. "It hurts, and there's nothing you can get me that I'm allowed to have right now."

"Fair enough."

"How are you?"

I smiled sadly, brushing some of his dark curls away from his face, my thumb swiping under his eyes. It felt so unbelievably _good_ to see his eyes. "Not a scratch. Baby is fine. She's been kicking all day. I guess she could sense that her daddy was in danger."

His hand sought my belly and I leaned closer so that he could reach better. "My girls…"

"We don't know it's a girl."

"It's a girl."

"I love you." I pressed a kiss to the back of his hand, his fingers still wrapped in my free hand.

"Love you." He closed his eyes again, exhausted from our brief interaction. I peered over at Lahja and Mom and saw that both of them were misty-eyed from watching our exchange.

Lahja wiped at her nose and tried to disguise her tears as she said, "He seems good."

"Yeah," I sighed, looking at his face again. "We're good."

Lennie visited the next morning when Eikko was much more alert. The nurse gave him a light breakfast that wouldn't put him at risk of getting sick from eating it with all of his pain meds. I hadn't needed to say anything to my younger brothers to know that I needed comfort through the night because without a word, they joined me in my bedroom for the night and kept close watch over me. With a few hours of sleep and a quick bath from Eloise, I felt refreshed enough to face whatever aftermath awaited me from the day prior.

The first matter to attend to was Lennie. She beat me to Eikko's room. She was standing at the foot of his bed, arms crossed, her jaw sticking out petulantly. I lingered outside the door, listening in. "I want to be part of your life, Eikko, and part of my grandchild's life but I refuse to remain jailed here any longer."

"We're not keeping you prisoner," Eikko insisted.

"Are you not? You brought me here without asking me how I felt about moving and leaving behind our business and our house-"

"You were moving to Swendway anyway," he remined her.

She huffed. "I would like to return to Swendway now. Today."

Eikko bit down on his bottom lip, looking torn. He chewed over it for a few moments, seriously weighing his options from the looks of it. "Okay," he finally acquiesced. "I'll have one of the secretaries arrange your travel for the day."

"Thank you, Eikko." Her tone softened. "I am glad that you're okay."

"You'd be happier if I went with you today, right?"

"Of course. I hate the idea of you being involved with something so messy and dangerous."

He shrugged. "She's the love of my life. She is my soul mate. I would walk through fire if it meant keeping her and our baby safe."

"You will do good work here, Eikko. We have no doubt of that."

"Thank you." She stepped forward to kiss his forehead. Al followed suit and shook Eikko's hand, both smiling sadly as they passed me on their way out.

Al stopped before me. "Thank you for all that you have done. We want to return when it is safe. I want to meet my grandchild."

I rose on my tiptoes so that I could embrace him, wanting him to know that I appreciated his kind words. It would be strange not having them around and the separation would be hard on Eikko, but I couldn't keep them here like prisoners. "Thank you for Eikko," I whispered to Al. He patted my arms and then left the hospital wing behind his wife.

I joined Eikko on his bed, sitting near his hip. "So they're leaving for good?"

"Seems so," he sighed dejectedly. "I always knew that they wouldn't be here long. I'm glad that they were here and they have a better idea of what we do here. But I can respect them for wanting to be _home_ home right now. Don't worry, she did ask how I was doing before you got here."

"Do you get scared?" I asked suddenly.

"Scared of what?"

I waved at the room. "This, the dangers of our lives here. This isn't what you're used to and it certainly isn't what you signed up for. I'm sure that when you arrived here last year you didn't think that you would be lying in a hospital bed right now because of a New Asian spy."

"I'm always scared, Eadlyn, but I'd be more scared of you doing all of this on your own. I'm lying here because the only other option was to have you at the town hall. I took that bullet for you and our baby. I would do it again if I needed to."

"I wish you didn't have to think like that."

He shrugged. "Ours has never been the most conventional relationship. This is just another part of that." He brushed his thumb over my knuckles. "I've said it a hundred times, Eadlyn, and I pray that this is the last time I have to say it for you to really get it: you're worth it."

I pursed my lips as tears pricked at the corners of my eyes. "Good, because I do need you. I never thought I would need a man in my life but I really do need you. Congratulations, you turned me into a living, breathing human being."

"Maybe I wanted to marry a rock with no feelings." He curled his finger at me, indicating for me to lean forward. I happily obliged him, minding the bandages on his stomach and being careful for my baby belly to not press into him too much.

Unfortunately, I could only let my dad take care of my duties for so long and I had to return to work the following day to see to the fallout from Ivan. Eikko's parents had landed safely in Swendway and I alerted our distant cousins that they were there. They agreed to place some undercover guards near their house for protection, keeping at a safe distance so that they didn't suspect anything.

Lady Brice had the latest report for what happened on my desk, although Officer Wells had filled me in already. I put it aside and studied the next letter in the stack of papers. It was signed from General Leger and without having to read it, I knew what it said. I snatched the paper off of my desk and went outside to the hallway where Officer Wells was stationed.

"Where is General Leger?" I demanded, starting to shake with anger.

"I believe in his office, ma'am."

I stormed down the hallway to the office closest to the main stairwell. Before General Leger was in charge, the general's office was downstairs close to the barracks but he and Dad worked together so closely trying to negotiate with New Asia and putting the rebels to rest that it wasn't practical for him to be four floors down. They cleared out a conference room and made it into the new general's office. It was closest to the steps so that he could move about the palace efficiently but it also meant that he was in the first line of defense if anyone dangerous found their way to the fourth floor and an heir or adviser was there.

He was standing at his desk, signing various documents and sliding them into a manila folder. "Queen Eadlyn, how can I help you?" he asked, not a hint of trouble in his voice as he addressed me.

"What is this?" I growled at him, showing him the letter.

He glanced up and sighed deeply before going back to his documents. "My letter of resignation."

"Who said you can resign?"

"Me." He ran a hand through his hair, a habit he and Dad seemed to share. "I don't need your permission to do this, Eadlyn. It's my career that I'm surrendering. Things will carry on much the same for you."

"I don't understand. I thought you love your job."

He struggled to come up with the right words. Finally, he said, "I love my job when I'm doing it well. Doing my job well means that you and the royal family are safe. Right now, the prince consort is recovering from a bullet wound that I couldn't take for him. I've failed you, Eadlyn. If he had died, it would have been my responsibility."

"You couldn't have predicted this-"

"It's my job to predict this!" he exploded. "I assigned Ivan to Kaden's security detail. I gave his name to your parents. I placed an enemy spy right in the most advantageous position he could have been in. I never suspected a single thing about him. This is my fault." He paused to collect himself. "When I took this position, I promised your parents that I would never fail them, and I had a good streak. It's over though. Clearly the job has advanced past my abilities, and it's time to step down."

"It's my fault, actually. I planned the stunt with Ivan," I blurted out. He turned from the filing cabinet that he was about to slide a folder into, eyebrows in his hairline. "It was supposed to be a fake shot but then it turned out to be real...anyway, it's my fault that Ivan was even there in the first place. You can't quit for something that I did."

He shook his head. "I was the first one to put him here. The last general resigned after the massacre involving your parents. It's only natural for me to do the same."

"I still trust you to protect us."

"I don't trust myself. And you need someone who is confident."

He was really doing this. He was actually going to leave us. "Who will replace you?"

"I have a few men in mind. They've been sticking close to me this past year or so, starting to learn the ropes of my job. I'm not taking this decision lightly, Eadlyn. You will need someone strong and able to guide you through these next few months."

"Then why leave?"

"I'm exhausted," he said simply. "I need to spend time with my wife. I'm tired of having to spent nights here at the palace because of work. I'm tired of having to explain that to her. She would never dare ask me to forego my duties to be her husband but it's time I start putting her first. She needs it."

"Mom always said that you're the hero Miss Lucy needs," I said quietly.

He smiled at that. "I'm no hero, Eadlyn. I just have the opportunity to be heroic." He lifted a folder from the filing cabinet and handed it to me. "This is what you should know about Marid and New Asia. It's not a lot. It's really one big puzzle but I trust you to figure it out. Your father trained you well."

"I guess I'll sign this then," I said, tucking the letter of resignation inside. "It's been good to have you here, General Leger." I offered him my hand and he gladly accepted, giving me a firm shake.

"It's been my pleasure, Your Majesty."

I walked back to my office, folder tucked closely to my chest. I looked around me at the fourth floor of the palace. All of the portraits that I had opted to have up here as decoration had been changed. The curtains were a deep blue, different from the crimson ones Mom had selected. The palace was changing, and so was the world around it.

It felt right, though. It was the natural transition of things, the cycle of royalty changing in and out. I rubbed my belly, feeling my baby kick back. "Don't worry, baby, we'll make it all good for you." She kicked my bladder then. "Right, after I use the bathroom."


End file.
